


Becoming Magic

by nlpiersee



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-15
Updated: 2021-03-21
Packaged: 2021-03-23 10:33:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 21
Words: 159,469
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30054093
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nlpiersee/pseuds/nlpiersee
Summary: Based on BBC's Merlin, takes place post season 3 and leads in to season 4.Arthur Pendragon has been crowned King of Camelot as his father's condition worsens. His coronation is celebrated with a fortnight of festivities.Merlin shares some secrets and finds more acceptance than he thought was possible. His magic matures and he has trouble controlling it at times.After an unfortunate encounter with Slavers, Arthur has demanded that Merlin take part in a training regimen including swordsmanship and hand-to-hand.The Knights all know about Merlin's magic and have claimed him as their younger brother. Well. Except Gwaine, who wants more than friendship with the warlock.Cross-posted on wattpad.
Relationships: Gwaine/Merlin (Merlin), Gwen & Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Gwen & Merlin (Merlin), Lancelot & Merlin (Merlin), Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)
Comments: 8
Kudos: 42





	1. King Arthur

It’s been a week since Arthur took his oaths and became the Once a Future King of Camelot. A full week of festivities has been enjoyed and there was still one more week of celebrations planned. There were still signs in the citadel and lower town of people rebuilding after Morgana and Morgause attempted takeover. Uther was still in his disconnected state. Gaius said the best anyone can do for him is keep him comfortable. It’s not easy for Arthur to see his proud, strong, imposing father reduced to this broken shell of a man staring out the window. Arthur sits with him at the end of every day for an hour or two. This leaves Merlin off early now most days as once Arthur has visited his father he usually works at his desk or goes to bed. Merlin has been learning more and more from Gaius. He isn’t quite a skilled physician yet, but he gets by being an apprentice and treating small ailments and injuries. Using his magic as sparingly as possible, obviously.

The knights spend time preparing for a tournament to be held the last few days of the celebrations followed by one final feast, before things were expected to turn back to a more normal pace. Lancelot and Leon were pretty evenly matched with a sword, Gwaine was unconventional and brash, Elyan was skilled, just not quite on Lancelot or Leon’s level. Then there was Percival who most couldn’t even get close to due to his reach. There were many commoners who had entered as well, determined to make an impression on the new King and get a chance at joining his Knights. Evenings were spent enjoying a meal together or making bets for the upcoming tournament, or, in Gwaine’s case, going to the tavern and occasionally dragging Elyan or Lancelot with him. As much as he tried he couldn’t seem to get Merlin to join them. Of course, most of them didn’t know that Merlin was not even 20 yet. He had only turned 16 a few months after arriving in Camelot. Arthur was to be 25 soon. The youngest of the Knights that Merlin knew of was 22. It was strange sometimes when he stopped to think about their differences, not only in age, but of life experience in general. Arthur was raised to be a king one day, Gwaine’s father had been a Knight (though he refused to tell anyone), Lancelot had an uneventful and normal childhood dreaming of being a Knight one day; Elyan had planned to follow in his fathers’ footsteps working a forge, which he did for a time. Leon had known since he was very small that his duty would be to protect the future king, while Percival had lived on a farm but never really dreamed what would happen when he was grown. They all shared their stories and childhood tales every time they went out on hunting trips or were tricked into a drinking game with Gwaine.

No one had realized that the only things they knew about Merlin were that he was from Ealdor, his mother was Hunith, he was an apprentice to Gaius, and became Arthur’s servant by a weird twist of fate. Gwaine actually paused in the middle of a maneuver just realizing this, leaving himself open to get hit by Lancelot knocking him to the ground. Lancelot gave him a confused look and put his hand out to help him up. 

“You lost focus there my friend. Something on your mind?”

“I just realized something. Merlin has brought us all together, and we’ve had our adventures with him, but, what do we actually know about him?” Gwaine huffed out, catching his breath from the hit. 

“He doesn’t really ever talk about himself,” Elyan noted. 

“Ever! I mean he makes small talk well enough and gets Princess all worked up, which is hilarious, but he doesn’t ever talk about his life, or anything he’s done or does when he’s not with us”, Gwaine said, his mind turning because he wants to rectify this with his best friend.

“Merlin certainly is an enigma”, Lancelot states. Gwaine catches the look in Lancelot’s face and realizes something. Lancelot knows something of Merlin’s past. 

“What is it you know?” he asks Lancelot.

“It is not my place to say what I know, it is up to Merlin if he wants to share any of what he’s been through.”

“The way you say that does not inspire confidence that our dear friend has had an easy and happy life” Gwaine says and they all turn to head in for the evening. Lancelot just sighs. If only Merlin would open up about at least some of what he’s done for the King and the Knights, then maybe his friend would be able to relax a bit more. 

“Do you know how old he is? I don’t even know when his birthday is. What kind of friend does that make me if he celebrates with me each year, but not I with him?” Gwaine wonders aloud. 

At that all the knights stop in their tracks and look at each other. It’s true. Merlin has helped each of them celebrate at least one birthday but they’ve never even thought to ask. On that somber note, they head to prepare for yet another banquet all silently agreeing to get it out of Merlin before the night is over.

Merlin collected papers from the council meetings that seemed to take the entire day then followed Arthur back to his chambers to help him prepare for the feast. He stacked the documents neatly on the desk and headed to the wardrobe to pick out the night's attire. As he was setting things out there’s a knock on the door. 

“Enter” Arthur states flatly. 

“Sire, I was wondering if I might have a word with you. In private”, Gwaine says looking towards Merlin setting out the clothes.

“If you can give me a few minutes to get dressed for the feast, I can send Merlin off after that,” Arthur says as he heads behind the dressing screen. 

“I’ll just be outside waiting then” Gwaine says and turns and leaves the room.

“Alright Merlin, let's hurry this up, I need to get in there and get this over with.” 

“Yes Sire” Merlin replies with only a touch of sarcasm. He’s been careful of how he talks to Arthur lately with the coronation happening and his father being ill, he doesn’t want to distress his King unduly.

As he finishes tying up Arthur’s cape he hands him the crown which Arthur places on his head with a heavy sigh. “That’ll be all for tonight Merlin.” Merlin nods and heads out the door. As Gwaine sees him walk off he comes back in the room and closes the door behind him. 

“Alright, Gwaine, what is it you wanted to speak with me about that can’t seem to wait until tomorrow?” Arthur asks. 

“Merlin, actually, Princess. Me and some of the others got to talking earlier and realized he's like a little brother to us, but we don’t know when his birthday is. Or how old he is now. I guess I’m wondering if you know?” he finished looking around the room a bit.

Arthur just stared at his Knight. Guilt rushed through him as he understood now what was being asked. Did he, Arthur, know when his most trusted friends’ birthday was? He’d never actually even thought about it, hence the rising guilt. Gwaine noticed the King visibly pale and he looked at him. “I don’t know”, Arthur nearly whispered in response. “How is it, I’ve known that….that….idiot! For years and I have no idea.” 

Once Arthur was done Gwaine could see how much it upset him. “Don’t get too upset, we were talking about it leaving the training grounds earlier and no one seems to know. All the times he’s talked with us, given us advice, and we were all so thankful to have someone who could help with our burdens we never thought about who Merlin actually talked to. Lancelot knows something. He won’t share, we’ve already asked. He said that was up to Merlin”, Gwaine put his hands up as Arthur was starting to get some color back realizing that someone else knew more about the person he spent the most time with. “We plan to corner him sometime tonight or tomorrow to see if he’ll open up to us.”

“Thanks Gwaine”, Arthur says, putting a hand on his friend's shoulder, “Please let me know if you find anything out as well. It seems we’ve all neglected our little brother too long.” At that they nod and head towards the feast. 

*********

Merlin was walking back to the Physician’s chambers when he noticed Lancelot waiting outside the door, ready for the feast, but looking a tad anxious. 

“Hey Lance, are you looking for someone?” Merlin asks, looking at his friend quizzically.

“You actually,” Lancelot says as he looks up and sees Merlin coming up and heading in the door.

“Me, are you alright, is something wrong? Gaius isn’t here, but I’m getting better if you need some sort of remedy…..” he trails off when he notices Lancelot close the door and start pacing the middle of the room. He stops and turns towards his friend leaning against a table while Merlin leans against a wall.

“How old are you Merlin?” 

This seems to have come out of nowhere. He blinks in response, before clearing his throat, “Um, er, why?”

“Humor me. How old are you?”

After a long pause, and some internal debate, he said “I’ll be 20 soon”. Barely above a whisper

Lancelot just stares. He knew Merlin was young, but he did not realize he wasn’t even 20! “When is soon?”

“What’s this about Lance?” Merlin asks nervously.

“Earlier during training, Gwaine got distracted during our bout and I knocked the breath out of him, landing him in the grass. When he was back on his feet he started asking everyone what they actually knew about you. Like when your birthday was, because you are always around to celebrate with us and make sure we have a good day. But we have no idea when that day is for you.” Lancelot had started pacing again while he was speaking and stopped taking a deep breath after getting that out. 

Merlin cocks an eyebrow at him. After another internal debate, he figures why not? “My birthday was never anything special growing up, it was always just my mother and I. When the other kids in the village would ask they would just bully me saying that a bastard doesn’t deserve a birthday.”

Lancelot, stunned into silence by the hurt in Merlin’s voice just stares at his friend. “So why haven’t you celebrated since you’ve been in Camelot?”

“There hasn’t been time. When I arrived, I arrived to see a man executed for having magic. And then…so many other things were happening, and they  _ kept _ happening, and it just never seemed important, never even came up. Just another day.” Merlin said quietly.

“Is there no one here that celebrates your day with you?” Lancelot asks a tone of sadness realizing even he’d neglected his friend.

“Gaius tried to when I first got here, but it just gave me nightmares from when I was younger and would be teased and beaten for thinking I should be able to celebrate.” Merlin says looking at the floor.

“Merlin. We are your friends. We want to celebrate the day that the man who brought us all together was born. Let us thank you for all that you have done for us, let alone Camelot.”

Merlin just grinned, it was a sad kind of grin, but it was something. “My birthday is the end of next week. Final day of the tournament actually. But, please, don’t tell anyone yet. If you must tell anyone, wait until the tournament is over, and then, only then, if you want we can celebrate.”

“Thanks for trusting me Merlin. There should be no secrets between brothers after all.” Lancelot gives Merlin a hug and heads out to join the feast, meeting Gaius at the door. Gaius simply shuts the door and walks into the room over to Merlin. 

“I know that wasn’t easy, my boy. But it’s good of you to share.” Gaius always seems to know what to say. 

“I’ve kept it to myself so long I wasn’t sure I should share. Everything that’s happened since I got here has been keeping me busy and I was hoping over time the new memories here would just make that old hurt go away. Maybe now it can.” Merlin walked up to his room and lay down on the small bed thinking how lucky he was to have friends that cared and worried over him. 

*********

Arthur had noticed Lancelot enter the feast late and pointed it out. “I thought you all ended training early to be here on time tonight?”

While sitting down and pulling a plate towards him he says, “Sorry, I went to talk to Merlin for a bit”. 

You could almost hear Elyan, Percival, Leon, Gwaine, and Arthur all snap their heads in his direction. It was a bit amusing so Lancelot said nothing. 

“And?!” Arthur demanded.

“Yeah Lance, don’t get the Princess all worked up. What’d he say?”

“First, a wager I believe. Gwaine?” Lancelot looks at Gwaine seeing a twinkle in his friends’ eye and smirk spread on his face. 

“Alright, I am putting my money on 21. Any takers?” Gwaine looks around at the others. 

Elyan says, “I’ll go with 23.”

Percival studies Lancelot for a second and says “20”. Arthur goes for 22 and Leon 24.

“Alright Lance, what’s the verdict?” Gwaine asks.

“Well, he is a wise little one, but you are all wrong.” At this everyone lets out a groan and pays Lancelot, who grins for a half a second before getting serious. “Our little brother, for that is what he is, will be 20 at the end of next week.”

Everyone just stares at Lancelot.

“That can’t be right.” Leon says. “That would have made him, what, around 15 or 16 when he was given the position as Arthurs’ manservant?” 

“That does explain some of his childish responses to certain events, though it doesn’t explain his random good advice.” Arthur ponders aloud.

“Wait so his birthday is next week?” Gwaine asks.

“That it is. The last day of the Tournament actually. HOWEVER, he does not want to do anything until after Arthur’s celebrations are ended” Lancelot states looking each Knight, and the King, in the eyes. 

“Think I can get him drunk enough to tell us about growing up?” Gwaine asks innocently.

“Do you really think it’s a good idea to try and corrupt him?” Elyan retorts.

“If it gets him to talk about himself, I’m all for it.” Gwaine responds by taking a drink.

“So should we plan something?” Percival looks to Lancelot.

“I don’t know.” Lancelot’s face drops and shows some of the concern he was trying to hide from what Merlin had told him about why he never did anything. Unfortunately the group had seen this reaction.

“What happened?” Arthur asks. 

“Merlin explained why he doesn’t celebrate, or tell anyone. He said when he was younger the kids of the village would bully or beat him and tell him that a bastard didn’t deserve a birthday. He told me that when Gaius tried to celebrate with him when he first arrived it gave him nightmares and they haven’t celebrated since.” Lance finishes looking into his cup.

He looks up to see the shocked faces of his friends. They had the same reaction he did. How could anyone do that to a child? Let alone one as good and kind as Merlin. 

“Well then”, Gwaine says coming out of his shock first, “it seems we owe our little brother a good birthday memory”. Agreement and determination swept across the Knights faces and the King masked his face but nodded in agreement. The rest of the night was spent trying to enjoy the food and entertainment before everyone headed back to their beds for the night. 

*********

Across the castle, Merlin was tossing and turning. A cold sweat broke out across his face. He wasn’t dreaming, but an intense and sudden panic had come over him.  _ Emrys, they are coming. You must be ready! _ He woke retching on the floor heaving in gulps of air trying to ease his heart back to a normal pace. Gaius had come in and seen he was shaking uncontrollably on the floor and put a hand to his head. He was burning up. Gaius helped guide his ward back to the bed and covered him with the extra blankets he kept for patients. He got a wet cloth and put it on Merlin’s head trying to bring down the fever that seemed to have suddenly gripped him. Gaius sat with him as the dawn's light started to creep across the sky. Merlin was still shaking and his lips were slightly blue. Gaius stepped out to stop a serving girl passing by to fetch him some water and inform the staff that another servant would need to assist the King today as Merlin was too ill. Half an hour later the door opened and instead of the serving girl, Lancelot was standing there with the bucket. 

“Lancelot, I wasn’t expecting you.” Gaius says looking at the knight. 

“I asked the girl getting water why she was out so early, and she said Merlin was ill. I had to come check on him. Do you know what’s wrong with him?” Lancelot tried to hide his worry.

“I’m not sure just yet actually. He woke in the night retching and has a fever. Since you are here, could you help me bring him out here so we can put him next to the fire? I think that might help warm him up.”

Lancelot sets the bucket down and heads up into Merlin’s room. He reaches down and puts his arms under the boy's head and knees and brings him out to the patient cot in front of the fire while Gaius promptly starts piling on blankets. At that moment Merlin gasps loudly arching his back and several things happen at once. The fire flares up, several books levitate off the tables/shelves they are on, several flasks and jars shatter and the water from the bucket explodes out. When Merlin falls back to the cot, it all stops. The fire is back to normal, the books have fallen, and the little bit of water still in the bucket sloshes around. Gaius and Lancelot look at each other and then down at Merlin who seems to be breathing easier now and not shaking as much. 

“Does that happen often?” Lancelot asks Gaius. 

“That’s a first actually.” He reached down to test Merlin’s head with his hand. He’s still warm but it is starting to go down. “If you aren’t busy, could you go and fetch me some more water?”

“Of course.” Lancelot grabs the near empty bucket and heads to get it refilled. When he returns Gaius is trying to sweep the remnants of the shattered glass. 

“Thank you Lancelot. If you want to check on him again later, I’ll let him know you came by.”

“Thank you Gaius. If there is anything else he might need, just send someone to fetch me.” At that Lancelot turned and headed for the training grounds knowing that whatever just happened could mean nothing good for the young warlock. 

Gaius had finished clearing away the glass and was examining a book while sitting in the chair next to his patient. He looked over when saw Merlin starting to stir. 

“Gaius, what’s going on?” Merlin’s deep sleep voice questions. 

“You had some sort of episode last night. You don’t remember?”

“I…I remember going to bed, but I don’t remember dreaming. It was strange though. I felt this surge, almost like a rush of just pure panic and I got swept away like it was an ocean. There was something dark there. I could sense it. It was trying to use me to pull itself out of wherever it was. I’ve never felt anything like that before.” Merlin finishes closing his eyes. 

Gaius looks at this young boy, his boy. So much rests on him. How he has not been broken by the weight of destiny is a miracle. All he can do is look at him and pat his arm and tell him to try and rest. 

After an hour, a few of the knights came by to check on him. Seems they couldn’t focus on anything but the health of the young warlock. 

“He will be fine. He just needs some rest. He should be back on his feet and running around the castle tomorrow.” At his words the Knights all visibly relax. Gaius hadn’t realized how much everyone around relied on Merlin. For his grins, his jokes, his banter with the King. It seemed when he was out for the count everyone sort of scrambled. He hoped that wasn’t a foreboding feeling settling in his stomach just then. He knows all too well how much he himself relies on the young warlock. 

Merlin shot up from his bed looking around confused momentarily forgetting where he was. Realizing he was in the main physician chambers and not his room, he walked up the few steps and dressed for the day, though dawn was barely starting to break across the sky. Something was going to happen and soon. And it would not end well. With that cheerful thought he walked through the castle towards the kitchens to get Arthur's breakfast. When he opened the door to the King’s chambers he found the bed not slept in and his King standing at the window watching the sunrise. Merlin set the breakfast down on the table and went to get clothes out as the King looked like he hadn’t changed, noting the wrinkles and smudges on the sleeves. When he turned around Arthur was looking at him. It was not a look Merlin was accustomed to. It almost looked sad and concerned. “Good morning Sire, you need to eat so you can get ready for training with the knights and then….” He trailed off as Arthur walked over to stand in front of him. “Is something wrong?” he asks his King.

“How long have we known each other Merlin?” He says, his face now a mask hiding any emotion that may tell me where this conversation is going. 

“I dunno, almost five years?”

“And in all that time, have I made you feel… like I don’t care about you?”

“Where is this going, Arthur?”

“Have I made you feel like you couldn’t share anything about your life? Have I somehow offended you or something that I’m not aware of?” Merlin could feel the sincerity and concern coming from his friend. 

“No? No, Sire, you haven’t. My life isn’t much to talk about. My life, my burdens, are mine to bear. They are trivial when compared to those of a King making decisions for his country.” It comes out in such a low tone that as soon as the words are out, he’s across the room getting the papers together on the desk for the afternoon council meeting, and gathering the laundry, but Arthur seems to be stuck just standing there staring at where the boy had been standing, before slowly moving to the table to eat breakfast. As he sits down Merlin sees what looks like hurt in his King’s eyes.  _ Does it bother him that much that I don’t tell him anything about me? _

Arthur clears his throat, “Lancelot told me you were ill yesterday, how are you feeling today?”

“Better. Gaius can’t figure out what it was, but I seem to have recovered. Will you be needing me for training this morning or would you like me to get started on the wash?”

“Training. I think it would do well for the Knights to see you out and about and the fresh air could do you some good. You look near as pale as the dead. After that you can sharpen my sword, polish my armor, and wash my clothes.” Arthur grins as Merlin purses his lips together and nods in acknowledgement. 

Armor on, the two head down to the training grounds where several of the Knights seem more interested in Merlin’s well being than paying attention to Arthur. Arthur takes note of this and his face lights with a small smile. Merlin goes to his normal position at the side and prepares to watch and hope he’s not participating this time. Gwaine comes over and bumps shoulders with him. 

“Heard you were sick. Seems you’ve recovered.” 

“You know me, Gwaine, works never done.” Merlin chuckles, but notices Gwaine’s smile falter.

“I should hope to know you, Merlin. You’re my best friend and the little brother I never thought I needed. Better get out there before Princess takes it all out on the youngins.”He says and walks off. 

Merlin watched as he walked away, stunned into silence. Little brother. Is that how these clotpoles see him? Well, it’s better than just another face in the crowd. The thought warmed him up and chased away the remaining cold chills of the previous night. Maybe training wouldn’t be so bad today. 

After training was done, Arthur watched as Merlin gathered his armor and sword and headed off to take care of his daily tasks. Once he was in the castle and surely out of ear shot, he turned to face the other Knights who were also standing around trying to look busy. 

“It’s a good thing we aren’t planning a secret mission, or you lot would be found out immediately.” Arthur states looking at his Knights as they move over to him. 

“Have you talked with him today?” Leon asks, the eagerness in his voice betraying his calm demeanor. 

“Don’t hold out on us Princess” Gwaine adds.

“I tried. I asked him if he knew that he could confide in me, and his response was ‘my burdens are mine to bear’”, Arthur said looking at the ground. 

Percival was the first to break the silence, “why would he not think we could lessen the burden like he’s done for us?” 

“After what he told me about what the village kids would do to him for his birthday, I’d hate to think what could have happened just in his daily life.” Lancelot mumbles a bit angrily.

“On that chipper thought, where are we holding this little celebration for Merlin? The tavern is a good spot, for obvious reasons, but drinking isn’t really Merlin’s thing” Gwaine states looking around the group. 

“Are you sure? Gaius is always telling me when he’s not around that he must be in the tavern. Are you telling me you’ve never seen him there?” Arthur looks at his Knights starting to get upset. 

“Merlin in the tavern?” Gwaine scoffs, “The only time I’ve seen him there was when he was near carrying me out.” 

“We could plan a hunt, or at least tell Merlin we’re going on a hunt and just go camping. He always looks peaceful when he’s able to be in nature.” Elyan mentions. 

“Will that work? I mean he has to know by now that Lancelot has told us when his birthday is, so wouldn’t he know we were up to something?” Leon asks, looking to the others. 

“Doesn’t matter if he knows somethings up. As long as we get him out and give him a proper celebration. I’ll talk to Gwen and see if she can stop by the kitchens and have them prepare something. We’ll bring some drinks, and maybe, if we’re lucky, he’ll start to share some of his burden with us.” Arthur looks at his Knights as he finishes his statement. They all head inside to prepare for the rest of the day's duties and look forward to celebrating their little brother. 

*********

The next few days went by quickly enough. Dueling competitions, crossbow contests, and a few more feasts. Merlin started getting headaches the closer his birthday came, and he would wake in the middle of the night from screams, that turned out to be his. Gaius was starting to get worried. When he gave Merlin a sleeping draught the evening before his birthday, he decided to go to the King. When he got to Arthurs chambers he was only slightly surprised to find he had just gotten in and was just staring at some papers on his desk. 

“Ah, Gaius, you’re up late. What can I help you with?” Arthur asks, putting his quill down. 

“Sire, I wanted to speak with you about Merlin.”

At the mention of his friend, Arthur stands up and goes around the front of his desk leaning against it. “What about him? Is he ill again?”

“I’m not exactly sure. He has been having headaches that are growing worse, though he won’t admit it, and he’s only sleeping two or three hours a night. I gave him a sleeping draught before I decided to come inform you.” 

Arthur looks to his physician. “Do you think it’s because of his upcoming birthday? Or could it be something more serious?”

Gaius can tell the King is worried but is trying not to show it. “At first I thought maybe it was a residual effect of his ailment a short while back, but it doesn’t seem to be getting better. I’d like to keep him near me tomorrow if that’s alright, so I can keep an eye on him.”

Arthur nods. Tomorrow is the last day of the tournament. Hopefully Merlin would be well enough after tomorrow so they could still enjoy his celebration. “Of course. If he worsens I expect to be notified immediately. We’ve been planning a trip to take Merlin out and celebrate with him. I know the Knights would be sorely upset.”

“Of course, my lord.” Gaius bows and heads back to his chambers to check on his ward. 

*********

As Gaius opens the door to his chambers, his jaw drops. All around the room, it seems as though everything; every book, vial, plant, everything is levitating. It really was incredible to witness. The fire was changing colors from its normal color to green, then violet, then blue, and white. Some of the plants had started sprouting roots and were actually growing in the air! As he stumbled through the main part of the chambers he could make out a soft golden light coming from Merlin’s room. He rushed in and opened the door only to grab the frame for support. Not only was everything in Merlin’s room levitating as well, so was Merlin! The soft golden glow was coming from him. “Merlin, what is happening to you my boy…” he whispers. He rushes back to the main door to ensure it is locked and comes to sit in the chair beside Merlin’s bed. He notices the look of complete peace and serenity on the young boy's face. Something that is so innocent and pure he doesn’t think he’s ever seen him this way before. As the dawn breaks, Gaius notices that Merlin has somehow lowered down to a hands-breadth above the bed now. The golden glow started to soften. 

Just then there’s a knock on the door. Gaius rushes out of Merlin’s room pulling the door shut, knowing that the main chambers are still full of levitating objects, he quickly opens the door and steps into the corridor before addressing the guest. He looks up to see Lancelot’s confused face. Once Gaius sees who it is he opens the door and ushers the Knight inside quickly. To say Lancelot was shocked, would be an understatement. He looked around and noted the near fully matured plants that have sprouted in the air. Turning to Gaius, he simply asks “how?”

“I don’t know.” Gaius says and he walks up to Merlin’s room and opens the door to reveal the same in there. Lancelot coming in right behind Gaius notices that Merlin is not actually on the bed and seems a bit golden. 

“Do you think it maybe has to do with him turning 20 today?” Lancelot asks, looking to Gaius. 

“I hadn’t thought of that. Maybe his magic has fully come into itself. I’ve never seen magic react the way it does to Merlin.” Gaius tells him.

When the sun fully peaked over the horizon a golden light seemed to expand and explode out from the young warlock whose eyes opened wide, the irises were fully golden, a small gasp escaping his lips. Everything in the main chambers somehow was set back down where it belonged and the fire turned to cinders. Gaius and Lancelot had barely breathed during the whole ordeal simply watching in amazed silence. Merlin blinked a few times, eyes staying the golden color, settling back on his bed. Gaius and Lancelot just stared at him. 

“Um, good morning? Did I miss something? I know I’m not late, the suns barely risen…” 

The two men continued to stare. 

“Do you remember anything from last night?” Gaius asks hesitantly.

“For once, no, I don’t. It’s strange. I feel like I got the best nights’ sleep I’ve ever had. Your sleeping draughts must be getting better.” Merlin said standing up to stretch. “Are you here in my room for something particular?”

“Merlin, get dressed and meet us out here, will you?” Lancelot said and pulled Gaius out the door. Once in the main chambers, “What are we supposed to tell him?” he whispers to Gaius. 

“The truth. His magic somehow protected him last night and a large amount of energy was released. Did you feel it?” Gaius looks to Lancelot.

“I felt it. It was nothing short of incredible. Like pure summer sunshine. I’ve never felt anything that...  _ good _ before.”

Just then Merlin came out dressed in his usual red shirt, blue neckerchief, and brown boots. “Alright what did I miss…” though his voice trails off as he sees all the plants and herbs had suddenly turned in to fully grown plants laying on the tables, hanging on the walls, and poking out of the jars on the shelves. “Gaius, what happened?” he said, looking to his guardian. 

“You happened, Merlin. I can’t explain it. After I gave you that sleeping draught I went to speak with the King asking if I could keep you near me today to ensure you were not falling ill again since you were having those headaches. When I came back everything in the room was in the air, the fire was changing colors, and plants grew roots and matured in the air right in front of my eyes. And you…you were hovering in the air with this golden light surrounding you.” Gaius paused here. Looking at the now panic stricken warlock. “As dawn was breaking, everything settled back into its place. And you. As soon as the sun was over the horizon you opened your eyes, and this golden light sort of surged out of you.”

At those last words Merlin sat down on the bench at the table. So many thoughts and emotions started running through his head. He could feel the panic building, but had no idea how to stop it. As his breathing became quicker he put his head in his hands not noticing the wind that started to whip up around him. 

“Merlin” Lancelot was kneeling in front of the young warlock. “Merlin, look at me.”

He looked up and met Lancelot's eyes as the older man put his hand on Merlin’s shoulder and the panic started to recede, and with it, the wind. Lancelot kept the eye contact, “Merlin, there is something else you should know”.

“What?” he croaked out.

“Your eyes, they are still golden. They have not gone back to the deep blue they normally are.” As Lancelot said this Merlin grabbed a nearby mirror and looked at his reflection. 

“I don’t understand….” He whispered. “What’s happening to me?”

Gaius and Lancelot just looked at each other unsure of what to say to comfort this amazing young person. 

“One thing is certain, you cannot leave this room or interact with anyone today. Not until this is more under control, or your eyes change back” Lancelot states firmly. Merlin just nods. Lancelot bids them both good morning and makes his way out of the castle to prepare for the final day of the festival, with no less than a million questions running through his mind. The foremost being, what is happening to his friend? His little brother.


	2. A Friendly Game

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Never have I ever

While he was walking toward the grounds, Lancelot had heard many people discussing that strange sensation of love and happiness that seemed to have gone through the town. The townspeople seemed to think it was a sign to come of how the Kings rule would be. 

“The whole castle is buzzing this morning. Did you feel anything this morning Lance?” Elyan asks as he joins Lancelot on the training grounds. 

“It was the most incredible thing.” Was all Lancelot could say, with a far off look in his eyes. 

“I don’t think I’ve ever felt anything that, I don’t know, peaceful? Content?” Gwaine was looking a bit troubled trying to find the words to describe what he had awoken to that morning. 

“Whatever it was, it happened on the last day of the tournament celebrating Arthur’s coronation. It’s got to be a good sign for things to come, right?” Leon said. 

Arthur was making his way over towards his knights to wish them luck before the tournament kicked off. “Best of luck to you all. I’m sure today is going to be quite interesting if this morning is anything to judge from. It’s been almost a year since Morgana and her immortal army were here, but for the first time, I feel like things are going to be much better from here on out.”

“It reminded me of home,” Percival said with a small smile. 

“It  _ felt _ like home” Arthur added under his breath, gazing towards the rising sun. Shaking his head as if to clear it, “Anyways, best of luck. Don’t celebrate too much this evening, I still plan to leave fairly early tomorrow.” At that Arthur made his way to the stadium and horns sounded marking his arrival to the gathering crowd. 

(Near the White Mountains) Morgana woke with a start. She looked around noticing that the sun had only crested the horizon moments ago. She was overcome by an intense and overwhelming feeling of all the good things she had pushed aside in her drive for revenge. She remembered being a little girl and sitting in a meadow with her father enjoying the early summer sun. It had been so long that anger and resentment had been driving her that she forgot what happiness truly felt like. She heard Morgause gasping near her and rushed to her sisters’ side. “No, it can’t be,” she whispered. 

“What? What can’t be?” Morgana questioned her. 

“Magic in the form of a pure soul has emerged. Much like a boy coming of age. That. That should not be possible!” Morgause struggled to sit up. “We must hurry, sister. As this magic will only grow and will prevent us from putting our plan into action.”

“I understand. But we must still wait for the right time. We are not far from the Isle of the Blessed, but Samhain is still weeks away.” Morgana reasoned with her sister.

“Of course. You are right. As we are both up, we may as well move on for today.” Morgause added. Morgana gathered up their belongings and loaded them up into the cart and then carefully assisted her sister in as well. She placed a blanket on her sister and began their journey once again.

*********

Deep in the Valley of the Fallen Kings, at an abandoned fortress, a group of disreputable men gathered. They sat around a stone table discussing ways to best bring about profit and prosperity for their like. The fire light and candles cast an eerie glow on their faces. “Since we’re all here, best get this started and over with and be on our way.” The man at the head of the table says. 

“So the plan is what? Meet here once a week to trade wares?” The man to his left asks. 

“Straight to the point then, eh Jorin? Alright, well, the plan is fairly simple. It seems that King Arthur has been quite occupied within the citadel of Camelot hosting a fortnight of celebrations for his coronation. Leaving those outside to fend for themselves. I was approached by a man called Helios who is in need of Soldiers that he plans to use to test this new King. I expect no less than a few men from each of you by the end of the week.” 

“And why should we join forces for this particular venture, Gregor?” Jorin asks.

“The Lady Morgana plans to retake Camelot in the near future. There are those who have offered a handsome price for any  _ wares _ we can acquire for them. As product comes in, money will be distributed.” Gregor finishes. 

The man at the other end of the table taps the table a few times, “alright, I‘m in”. 

“Very well, Darren, any other takers then? Jorin? William? Makes no difference to me, if you want to walk go on. Just means more money in my pockets.” Gregor looked at the men over his goblet that he drained. 

The two slavers look at each other, nodding, “We’re in”.

“Very well then! Head out and bring me what you can in the next five days. I expect results.” At that all the men, save one, got up to leave. “So Balin, what say you? You were quiet.” Gregor asks looking over to his second in command. 

“I have it on good authority that the new King and a few Knights will be out in the woods on the morrow. If we could get a few of them I think that may get us quite the reward from Odin. He has been looking forward to getting revenge on Arthur since his son was killed. I’d like to lead a few men and scout around and see what we can come up with.” Balin finishes.

“Do what you must. I’d love to see what Odin would pay for King Arthur. Be back as soon as you have something.” Gregor says dismissing Balin. 

*********

Merlin had no idea what to do. He was pacing in his small room pulling at his hair. He felt raw. There was no other word for it. He felt like an exposed nerve. His magic was barely under the surface and caused him to feel everything around. He could hear the roar of the crowds for the tournament as if he was in the midst of it. He could smell the fresh flowers that Gwen had brought in and put in Uther’s room. He needed to get away from everything or his magic was going to explode out and he had no idea what would happen. He walked out to the main chambers and started pacing again. Gaius looked up noticing this. 

“Merlin, worrying about this is not going to get your magic to calm down any time soon. You need to find something to focus on so you can calm your nerves as well as your magic.”

“I know Gaius, I know, but there is just so much right now I can’t process it. All of my senses are…enhanced. I feel as if I’m going to explode and I have no idea how that would turn out.” Merlin finally sat down on the bench next to Gaius. He bent his head down, closed his eyes and focused solely on taking several deep breaths. He inhaled and could almost taste all the different herbs and plants that were in the room. Merlin slowly lifted his head and continued his deep breaths while Gaius kept an eye on him. Merlin could hear someone coming down the hall with heavy footfalls. “Someone’s at the door,” he said. A moment later, a knock sounds, startling Gaius. “Come in”. Merlin was still sitting on the bench with his eyes closed and focusing his senses. “Lance, how’d the tournament go?” he asks. 

Gaius just looks at him quizzically. “Merlin, how is it you knew who was at the door? How is it you knew someone was even coming?”

“I can’t really explain it. I could just...sense it? I guess? Er, I could hear the footsteps down the hall and smell the sweat from the tournament. I don’t know. I can’t really answer how I knew.”

Lancelot came over and kneeled down in front of Merlin. “Merlin, can you open your eyes for me?”

“I’d rather not just yet. I think a few more moments and I can get this under control”.

The two men just stand up and move to the other side of the room while Merlin continues breathing with eyes shut tight. With one last deep breath out Merlin opened his eyes and another wave of magic rolled off of him. Nothing moved or shifted, not even Gaius or Lancelot. They felt it though, Merlin could tell from their posture and reactions that they had felt something. 

“Well you’ll be glad to know that your eyes have gone back to their usual color” Lancelot points out. Merlin grins for what seems the first time in many days. 

“What is it that you feel when my magic rolls over you?” Merlin curiously asks, standing up.

“Well, it seems to be a different feeling for everyone.” Gaius starts.

“I’m sorry, everyone? What do you mean for everyone? Who else would have felt it?” Merlin looks to his guardian and friend who just look at each other. This can’t be good, he thinks to himself. 

“Merlin, this morning when your magic surged out, it was felt throughout all of Camelot. At the least throughout the citadel” Lancelot explained. “Everyone was talking about it as we prepared for the tournament. Saying it must be a sign that better things are ahead and it must be because Arthur is finally King.”

Merlin just looked at this friend's mouth hanging open. “You’re telling me that everyone in this entire citadel felt my magic and thought it was something to do with Arthur?” 

“Seems to be so,” Gaius added. 

“I suppose that’s good, no one suspects sorcery at play. Or at least no one understands what it was they felt. But, um, er, Gaius, how am I supposed to keep this under control? I was barely able to get myself together after being in here all day. What happens if I’m out in a crowd or on a hunting trip…?” Merlin paused, looking suddenly panicked again. “A hunting trip! We’re meant to go out on a hunt tomorrow. Lance what if I can’t control this around the others. What if they notice that it’s coming from me?”

“Merlin, deep breaths, you need to get your magic under control. You’re going to cause a tornado or something.” Lancelot says putting a hand on the warlock's shoulder. Almost as soon as Lancelot touched Merlin he felt a surge of electricity. Not a bad shock, more of a jolt of pure energy. Merlin relaxed in the Lancelot’s touch letting the magic settle again. “I will help you figure this out”.

“Thanks Lance. You better get going, I hear they want to honor the winner of the tournament.”

“How did you know I won?” Lancelot asks, tilting his head slightly.

“Just… a feeling.”

“Well if you’re up to it, I’d love to have my little brother along for the night.” Lance grins as Merlin smiles brightly. They start to head toward the door when Lancelot pauses, “Oh, and Merlin?”

“Yeah?”

“Happy Birthday”

Merlin just blushes saying thanks as the two head down the corridor towards the festivities. Maybe his birthday wasn’t such a bad day after all?

*********

As they entered the great hall, they were assailed with shouts of congratulations and cheering. Merlin winced as his senses were overwhelmed. Lancelot, noticing the wince, simply keeps a hand on his shoulder and makes his way over to his table ensuring Merlin is ok up against the back wall while he goes to take his seat. Merlin closes his eyes to try and keep his magic from reacting to the cacophony around him. No one seems to notice the slight warm breeze that passes through. The knights and the King all continue with their chatting and dinner. Lancelot had his eyes on Merlin. When Merlin opened his eyes he saw Lancelot was looking straight at him. Something about the eye contact helped him to calm and get his magic back under control. He gave a grin of thanks towards his friend. No, not friend. Brother. That’s what Lancelot had said. This made Merlin relax more and with a final deep breath he released it and another surge of magic, though subtler, made its way outward. 

The King had noticed Lancelot and Merlin sticking close together and somehow Lancelot was keeping Merlin relaxed. He couldn’t riddle it out. He had wished he could be the one to make his friend feel so relaxed. He could tell from looking at Gwaine and seeing the sad look he had before taking a long drink, he was thinking the same thing. Something had happened that those two weren’t sharing with the others. He was shaken from his reverie as he caught a glimpse of Gwen walking around the other end of the hall. Arthur couldn’t help but stare at how gracefully she seemed to move through the room, effortlessly interacting with everyone. He knew he loved her. As he watched her leave, captivated by her movements, he let out a long sigh and turned his attention back to his knights. Of course as soon as he looked at them they were all staring at him with goofy smiles. 

“Something catch your attention, Sire?” Leon smirks. Arthur could feel a blush creep up over his face. 

“Nothing out of the ordinary” he tries to play it off. 

“Should we talk about what your intentions are towards my sister?” Elyan asks, raising an eyebrow at him.

He cleared his throat, “Currently no intentions. I just took over as King, I can’t very well pursue any kinds of intentions.”

“Don’t wait too long, my friend” Lancelot leans over to him. At that Arthur looks up with a question on the tip of his tongue, but shakes his head and changes his mind. This isn’t the time or place. “I don’t intend to Lance.”

“I’m going to turn in. I’d like to be fresh for tomorrows ‘hunt’” Percival says as he stands to leave.

“We should all turn in.” Arthur states as they all begin to rise. Scanning the room, Arthur realizes that Merlin is no longer there. Lancelot notices at the same time and tries to mask his concern. 

Lancelot left the others at the end of the hall making his way to the physician’s chambers. He knocked and promptly opened the door coming in to see if Merlin had made his way in only to find Gaius alone with a book in his hand and a look of deep concentration on his face. Seeing the physician hadn’t noticed him, he backed out of the room and started searching for his friend until he felt something. Kind of like a tug. He follows it, and finds himself high above Camelot on one of the western towers. There stood the young warlock looking peaceful as he watched the stars. Walking up carefully and standing next to him, he just stood there enjoying the view.

“Everything looks and feels so different. The stars seem brighter. The moon, closer. I can smell the new growth in the forest, I can hear the insects buzzing through the trees. I can feel the birds gliding on the breeze.” Merlin paused and looked over at him.

“Sounds…nice.” Lancelot says meeting his eyes. Merlin smiled and continued looking over the citadel. 

“I’m not sure how tomorrow is going to go. This is all very new and I’m afraid I might lose control of my magic.” His gaze shifts down towards the tower wall. 

“I will be there. If you feel like you are starting to lose control, just look to me and I will do what I can to assist you. You are not alone.” Lancelot puts his arm around his brother. “Now, let’s go get some rest. Tomorrow is going to be an early morning and you need your sleep if you’re going to get used to this new…energy.” At that Lancelot guides Merlin back down to the physician’s chambers and ensures he goes to bed. Standing in the room looking at the door to Merlin’s room, he glances over to see Gaius watching him. “You know more about him.”

Gaius looked as if he was debating something. “I will tell you what I know, because Merlin trusts you, but it cannot be repeated. Merlin, as you have noticed is… quite unique.” Lancelot sat down at the table across from him. “Merlin does not just  _ have _ magic. He was born with it. The first time his mother saw it, he was only a few days old. I think she knew then what destiny had in store for him. The reason this is important, is that no one has been born with magic as Merlin was for many hundreds of years, if ever. His magic is to him, as blood is to you or I. There are rumors amongst the Druids and magical folk that Merlin is the greatest sorcerer to ever walk the Earth. If you were to meet the Druids on the road with him, you would see the reverence in which they worship him. The way they tell it, is that Merlin  _ is  _ magic in physical form. He is all that is good and pure about magic and that is what we feel from him. To us, he is and always will be, Merlin. But to those who follow the Old Religion, the Druids, and others, he is Emrys. He has been carrying the weight of a destiny since he arrived in Camelot and a prophecy was given to him. He would help Arthur to become the Once and Future King who would bring magic back to the land bringing about a great peace and unity.” Gaius paused and took a few deep breaths. “He will not like that I’ve told you this, but you should know. I’ve never seen someone so young with so many scars.”

Lancelot just blinked at Gaius. “He’s known this destiny since he arrived?” Gaius just nods. “How bad are the scars?” He asks about getting serious. Gaius then looks down at the table.

“I’ve never seen a body endure so much and not be broken. And he always manages to smile and keep everyone around him in high spirits.”

“Do you think he would open up to me? About the scars? It can’t be good for him to keep all that in.”

“I think if anyone, he would open up to you. You’re like the older brother he never knew he needed.” Gaius says smiling. 

“I swear to you I will protect him if it is in my power to do so.” At that Lancelot gets up and checks on the young warlock sleeping soundly in his room before wishing Gaius goodnight and heading to his own bed. The whole while his thoughts were consumed with how much they all owed to this brave young man. 

*********

Merlin woke just before dawn feeling really great. He dressed in his usual opting for the blue shirt and red neckerchief today. Calming down his hair was not a successful venture so he gave up and went to greet Gaius. They sat down to have breakfast but all Merlin was thinking about was packing for yet another hunting trip he didn’t want to go on. He was working his way down a mental checklist while eating when Gaius touched his hand. He looked up to see him with a strange look on his face. 

“Gaius? What is it?” He asked concern coming through. 

“Merlin what were you just thinking about?”

“I was thinking of packing for this trip. Making a sort of mental list of what to take. Why?”

“Because I think you are already packed.” He said nodding behind him. As he watched, the things that he had been checking off in his head loaded themselves into the pack. Merlin turned back around to look at Gaius. They just stared at each other for a second. 

“Gaius I don’t think I should go. What if this happens while I’m with the King? I don’t think Arthur would hurt me, but I could be banished. I don’t think I could handle that!” Panic had started to rise in him and he was struggling to keep his breathing under control. He hadn’t even noticed the wind that had started up around him making him the center of a small whirlwind leaving everything outside of it untouched. He didn’t notice Gaius leave the room. The next thing he knew there was a strong hand on his shoulder forcing him to look up and open his eyes. He met Lancelot’s concerned but friendly gaze. Slowly, he started to get his breathing back under control. When had Lance gotten there? He realized that he had ended up kneeling on the floor and got up to sit back at the table. 

“Are you alright?” Lance asks. 

“I’m not sure. Did Gaius tell you? Ww-we-we were having breakfast and, and, and I was just thinking about what I needed to pack. And” Merlin gestured at his pack by his door, “it packed itself.”

At first Lancelot just looked at him. “Well it’d be best if we don’t let Arthur know about that little trick. He’ll have you packing everyone’s things in addition to your other chores.” Merlin could tell from the grin on Lance’s face that he was joking. He let out a soft chuckle relaxing some. 

“Thanks, Lance. I better get going. I don’t need the King being grouchy the whole day because I brought his breakfast late.” At that Merlin headed down the corridors to the kitchen to pick up Arthur's breakfast before going in to wake him. When he walked into Arthur’s chambers, he wasn’t in his bed. That’s strange. Merlin put the tray down on the table and went to open the curtains. As he did so, he noticed Arthur just entering. 

“Morning, Arthur.”

“Merlin. I thought you’d be late this morning, like usual. As I’ve managed to dress myself already, I’d like you to go and get the horses ready. We leave in an hour.” At that Arthur sat down to eat his breakfast. Merlin left and headed back to his room to grab his pack. Once he’d said a proper goodbye to Gaius, he made sure to grab the provisions from the kitchens and headed out to the stables. He had just got all the horses out to the front steps of the castle when the Knights and the King descended. Almost as if they had been just staying out of eyeshot waiting for Merlin to be ready. With barely a word they all mounted and headed off. 

The Knights all made small talk with Gwaine telling another ridiculous tale of how he was kicked out of yet another tavern. At midday Arthur called for them to halt and dismount and set up a camp. Merlin was a bit confused since they weren’t too far from Camelot but started rushing around putting the bedrolls and belongings on the ground and set up a spot for a fire. He hadn’t even noticed that the others were all just standing there watching him. By the time he figured it out, he was already done. The Knights seemed to snap out of their reverie and came over to Merlin and sat him down on a log. Getting a bit concerned he looked up at them tilting his head to the side a bit. 

“Alright Merlin, time for the truth.” Arthur said as the younger man sat there looking at everyone. He tensed, though tried to hide it. “The truth is, we didn’t come out here to hunt. Lancelot told us that yesterday was your birthday. We wanted to get you out of the castle and try to help you celebrate a bit.”

Merlin relaxed, though only a little. “There’s no need, honestly.” He tries to grin at his friends reassuringly, but they won’t have it. 

“Just sit here and relax, we’re going to hunt and make you a feast of your own.” Leon said this with such conviction that Merlin just smiled and nodded. He watched as all his friends, no brothers, banded off to try making a feast for him, with Gwaine giving him a wink before taking off. Lancelot stayed behind sitting down next to him smiling. 

“Surprise!” Lancelot exclaims.

“This is really great Lance. I don’t know how you convinced anyone to do this for me, but thanks.” Merlin grins blushing slightly at all effort the Knights had gone to for him. 

“I didn’t have to convince them of anything. If anything I had to convince them not to drag you out in front of the tournament and wish you a happy birthday in front of all of Camelot.”

“Ugh that would have been awful.” Merlin groans and shudders at the very idea. They sit in contented silence for a little while. Merlin winces all of a sudden as if in pain. 

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. They’ll be back in a minute, they just caught their prey.” Merlin says looking at the ground.

“And you felt it, didn’t you?”

Merlin just nods and gets up and starts getting the pots ready and starts cutting up vegetables until Lancelot takes the implements away from him and forces him to sit back down while he finishes. The others appear through the trees with their kill in tow and begin dressing it to prepare it for cooking. Gwaine goes over to his bags and grabs a few skeins out of wine that he had brought along. Before long they were all seated around the fire, meals in hand, and wine being passed around freely. Everyone was laughing and smiling and talking about the tournament. There was a lull in the conversation and everyone turned to Merlin raising up their drinks. 

“Though we would have liked to have celebrated with you these past years for your birthday, I promise here and now that you will never celebrate alone. You have helped us all in your own, odd, Merlin-way, and we are all grateful to have known you. So, cheers! Happy Birthday!” When Arthur finishes Merlin can swear he sees a blush creeping on to the King’s face. Everyone joins in with a loud “Happy Birthday, Merlin!” The loudest being Gwaine. 

“Time for a game!” Elyan announces. 

“A game?” Merlin asks, feeling more and more relaxed, effects of the wine, he is certain.

“Yes, a game,  _ Mer _ -lin. You do know what games are, yes?” Arthur jokes. Merlin just rolls his eyes.

“Alright,  _ Sire _ , what kind of game do you have in mind?” Merlin asks dripping sarcasm.

“How about ‘never have I ever’?” Gwaine asks. 

“What’s that?” Leon questions scratching his face.

“It’s simple. Someone starts and says, never have I ever, and if you have, then you take a drink.” Gwaine explains. Merlin knows this will probably end badly, but he’s enjoying himself, so why not?

“Alright, who starts?” Merlin looks to his friends. 

“Lancelot, why don’t you do the honors?” Gwaine says. 

“Alright, never have I ever, kissed Guinevere.” At that Arthur and Lancelot drink, and then so does Merlin drawing everyone’s eyes in shock. 

“When did you kiss Guinevere?!” Arthur demanded nearly shouting. Lancelot was stunned as well. Merlin was trying his best not to laugh at their expressions. 

“I don’t know if you count it as me kissing her, but she kissed me. It was years ago. It was when King Bayard was here and I drank from that poison cup, you remember, Arthur. When Gaius was able to make the antidote, thanks to you, and I woke up, she just sort of grabbed me and kissed me. It was a long time ago though. We’d only known each other a few weeks at that point” Merlin finished. Everyone just sat stunned for a minute absorbing this. 

“You drank poison?” Elyan asks, shocked.

“Erm, yeah, it was not a pleasant experience. I don’t recommend it. According to Gaius I died, for a short bit there, but apparently I’m too stubborn, as the next thing I know, I’m waking up and Gaius is comforting Gwen. Then she just kisses me. Hmm. Guess it wasn’t that long of a story after all.” Merlin ponders scratching his chin.

“Percival, why don’t you go next?” Lancelot says while still looking at Merlin. 

“Alright, uh, never have I ever helped Gwaine escape the wrath of some unsavory fellows.” After the laughter died down, Arthur and Merlin both drank. Leon raised his eyebrows looking at Merlin.

“I expect there’s a story there, eh Merlin?” Leon taunts. 

“Another long story, well a couple. Suffice it to say, the second time, uh, Arthur was on a solo quest, and I knew he was in trouble, so I went to get some help and found Gwaine in the midst of a brawl in a tavern. We ran, he pushed me off the side of a building into a giant haystack. Then we took off, me on my horse, and Gwaine had procured one from somewhere.” Merlin was smiling so wide his face was starting to hurt. He felt a warmth growing in his chest.

“Hey now, it was either I pushed you, or you’d still be standing on that ledge as we speak!” Gwaine put in causing the two to laugh even harder. 

“Alright, Gwaine, you’re next.” Percival said grinning at his friend. 

“Hmmm. Ah, never have I ever been caught with slavers and escaped.” Arthur, Merlin, and Gwaine all drank to that while the others just stared at them. “Merlin why don’t explain that one too.” Everyone’s gaze shifted to Merlin once again. Why did they want him to explain everything? 

“Erm. Alright. We were out looking for the cup of life and things had been going surprisingly smoothly. Which of course means something terrible is about to happen. Arthur and I were in the woods near Cenred’s border and next thing we know we’re waking up in a dungeon of sorts. Belonged to the slave trader Jarl. Gwaine was there, he and Arthur were meant to fight to the death so they put on a show while another slaver held on to me. Said it was incentive for them to fight. Anyway, somehow a fire caught above Gwaine and Arthur, I managed to get loose when the slaver ran to avoid the fire, and we took off.” As Merlin finished he looked up to find Leon and Elyan looking at him with a mix of awe and anger. “What?”

“So harming you was their incentive to get Arthur to fight?” Elyan asked.

“Erm, yeah, I guess. If he didn’t fight Jarl said he’d cut me up and feed me piece by piece to the crows.” 

“I still say I was winning that fight,” Gwaine said, looking at Arthur trying to ease the tension back to a lighter note.

“In your dreams.” Arthur replied with a mischievous grin. 

“So who’s next? Elyan?” Gwaine nodded to his friend.

“Right. Um. Never have I ever… fought a statue!” he finished excitedly. At that, Leon, Arthur, and Merlin all drank. “What?! How could you all fight statues?”

“Go on, Merlin.” Leon prompts.

“Well, um. A few years back Uther was having some tunnels under the castle excavated and a tomb was discovered. Turned out to be the Tomb of Sigan. An evil sorcerer King who swore he’d have his revenge on Camelot one day. There was a gem that housed his soul. It was stolen and his spirit released. Once he possessed a person he then used his magic to bring many of the statues and gargoyles on the castle to life and caused them to attack the citizens. Arthur and Leon and a group of knights did what they could but they weren’t able to do much. Can’t very well kill stone, ya know? Anyway in the end the spirit seemed to stop the chaos. Camelot had some sort of help as Sigan was once again trapped in the stone and placed back in the tomb which was sealed off again.” As he finished he took another drink while glancing at Lancelot, an unspoken acknowledgement that Merlin had once again saved them. 

“That is insane. Alright, Arthur, your turn.” Elyan says toasting his drink in Arthur’s direction. Arthur is just watching Merlin seeing his friend had drunk enough to start being totally honest with them. He smiled as he thought of what he could possibly want to know.

“Never have I ever gotten a scar protecting Camelot.” He said looking around at all the men in the group. Everyone drank. Merlin included, gods knew he had gotten his fair share of scars protecting his King and his friends in general. He seemed to take a longer drink than anyone else because all of a sudden everyone was looking at him. 

“What?”

“I don’t know that I believe you Merlin. Every time there’s a fight you’re usually behind a tree or something.” Arthur prods.

“Scars just tell more stories, Arthur. You should know that from all that you have.” Merlin says looking down. They all just stare. He wasn’t wrong. They just hadn’t expected such a despairing tone when he said it. 

“Has someone done something to you Merlin?” Percival asks, concerned.

“Not recently, no.” He shifts a little uneasily and clears his throat. “My turn now, yeah? Alright, erm, never have I ever…been cursed by a goblin.” He finishes already starting to laugh. Arthur and Leon drink while Merlin doubles over with laughter. 

“I’ve got to hear this story” Gwaine said smiling brightly at how entertained his friend is and how embarrassed the other two look.

“Merlin. We were all sworn to never speak of that again.” Arthur muttered darkly. Which made Merlin laugh harder tears streaming down his face at the sheer memory of it. He was almost glowing with how happy he was in that moment. The drink was not helping him to control his magic at all. 

“All I’m gonna say, is that I’m glad you figured out Gaius was possessed by a goblin before I could be burnt at the stake.” He gasped between laughs. Apparently this was the wrong thing to say because Lancelot was suddenly livid. 

“What?! Why would you be burnt at the stake?” He growled out. 

“Ah, uh, Gaius, who was possessed by the goblin, went in front of the court and Uther and announced that I was a sorcerer and came up with a magic book from somewhere. Luckily Arthur figured it out, and the whole thing was sorted.”

“How could that memory be so funny to you mate?” Gwaine asked, looking more than a little confused and concerned.

He started chuckling again, “well, erm, the only part I’ll tell is, Uther seemed to have lost all of his hair overnight. He was so upset, I can still remember his face!” At this Merlin was in fits of laughter again on the ground, causing the others to join in. A wave of joy washed out from Merlin without realizing it. When he finally got himself composed enough, he wiped the happy tears from his face and looked back to Lancelot. “Back to you it seems, Lance.”

“Never have I ever gone into battle without armor or a weapon of some sort” he finished putting his hand on his friend's shoulder. 

“That’s not really fair.” Merlin said after taking a drink. He never wore armor or chainmail, never carried a sword, he usually just grabbed one from a bandit or something and couldn’t use a crossbow for any kind of accuracy. 

“Why is that Merlin?” Leon asks, getting serious. “Why do you never even use chain mail?”

“Dunno. I mean, I’m just a servant so honestly not wearing it tends to give me a bit more of an advantage as you all end up being the main targets. Nobody really pays attention to a servant in the midst of a battle.” 

“Well, when we get back, I believe some swordplay lessons are in order, don’t you agree, Sire?” Lancelot says looking over at Arthur who now has a bit of a wicked gleam in his eye. 

“Absolutely, Lance, that’s a wonderful idea!” Merlin just groans thinking about it.

“Don’t worry Merls, I’m sure we’ll get you into fighting shape fairly quick” Percival says with a wink. “My turn. Never have I ever been enchanted.” At this the only one to drink was Arthur. “Alright Merlin, spill it, what happened?”

“Which time?” He scoffed. “Lady Sophia, turned out to be a Sidhe who was trying to use Arthur’s soul to earn passage back to Avalon. There was an enchantment put on both Arthur and Lady Vivian in effort to break down peace talks and cause a war. That one was broke by true love's kiss. Um, I think there was one more but can’t seem to order my thoughts just now.” 

“Luckily, Merlin somehow managed to get me back to myself before things went too poorly.” Arthur stated. 

“Alright, Princess, whatever you say.” Gwaine just winks at Merlin, who tries and fails to hide his snickering. “Ok, never have I ever. Hmm. Never have I ever fought a dragon.” He looks around expecting no one to drink only to see Arthur, Leon, and MERLIN all drinking. 

“Before you even ask, yes, we fought a dragon, it had attacked Camelot, but it’s done and over, let’s not talk about it.” Merlin said to forestall any questions. 

“That was the first time I really noticed you Merlin. I had thought you insolent and rude and that you owed Arthur more respect than you paid him. After that though, you riding out with us, no armor or anything, to take on a dragon. Very brave and selfless of you. Earned you my respect that day.” Leon finished looking up to the young man. 

“Thanks, Leon.” He said feeling his ears heat up.

“To you, Elyan. What have you got for us?” Gwaine asks.

“Never have I ever been in love.” No surprise that Arthur and Lancelot drank. Not too surprising Percival drank. But Merlin. No one expected that.

“Merlin, have you been holding out on us?” Elyan asks a tad jokingly. 

“It’s complicated. But it doesn’t end happily. I was in love. We were in love. And she was killed. She was killed because of a curse.” Merlin was looking down, noticing his vision getting blurry and touched his face to realize he was crying. He wiped his face. Taking a deep breath, “Sorry to drag down the party. Um, Leon, I believe you’re next.” They all just stare at him for a moment. Wishing they could ease a fraction of the pain they saw cross his face. 

“I’m sorry Merlin. I didn’t know.” Elyan says. 

“It’s fine. I never talk about it. About her. It hurts too much. I don’t even know why I’m telling you now aside from this silly game. BUT, let’s move on. Leon?”

“Hmm. Never have I ever fought a foe that was supposed to already be dead.”

“That’s specific.” Lancelot states. “We all fought Morgana’s undead army, does that count?”

“No, it does not. I mean wraiths, skeletons, and the like.” Leon clarifies. At this Leon, Arthur, and Merlin all drink. “Care to tell the story Merlin? Or one of them?”

“I’ll try.” He says scratching his head, causing his hair to stand up. “When Cenred attacked Camelot shortly after Morgana had been found and welcomed back, an army of skeletons had come from the crypt forcing Camelot to fight an enemy on two fronts. Turned out Morgana had taken a magical staff and entered the crypt and used it to resurrect them. I confronted her and was able to break the staff’s hold and the skeletons finally fell allowing the knights to push Cenred’s army back.” He took another drink after the tale and again found all eyes on him. 

“I didn’t know you did that.” Came Arthur’s quiet response. 

Damn. “Um. Well. I knew Morgana was planning something since she came back. I just had no proof. Plus it would have been my word against Morgana’s. She was Uther’s daughter so if I had said anything about it, I would have probably been strung up for saying such things. Anyway, it doesn’t matter. It’s in the past now.”

“I’m sorry for that. It must not have been easy knowing she had turned against us all and unable to let us know. Did she know that you knew?” Arthur asked sincerely.

He just let out a dark chuckle. “Yeah, she knew. She tried to kill me enough times. She would say that I needed to keep my nose out of things that didn’t concern me.” He took another drink.

“That time you were missing, I asked you where you had been, and you said you were dying. You weren’t lying were you? You really were dying?” Arthur looked hurt.

“Yeah, I was. Since apparently I’m telling this story, just wait til the end, yeah? I, er, I was taking medicine into Uther for Gaius shortly after the feast welcoming Morgana back when he had fallen ill. And noticed something on the floor. When I went to check what it was, the door opened so I hid under the bed. Not sure why, but it’s a good thing I did. There was a mandrake root under the bed that was being used to torture Uther. A hand reached under and grabbed it and when I looked out to see who it was, I saw Morgana leaving. So I decided to follow her when she snuck out of the castle that night. She met up with Morgause in the woods. It was right before Cenred attacked. Needless to say, I was found out and the witch sisters were not happy to be discovered.”

“What happened? What did they do to you?” Percival asked. Merlin just looked to the ground biting his lip debating on what to tell them. He decided on a sort of truth version.

“They, uh, knocked me out, then Morgana went back to the castle and left me with Morgause. When I woke she had placed enchanted chains on me that tightened anytime I moved or breathed. She questioned why I would defend Camelot, why I was so dedicated to Arthur. When I didn’t answer, she decided to just leave me there. I was attacked by a magical creature and its venom was very strong. I’m not sure how I survived. But when I woke I made my way to Camelot. I grabbed Gaius as soon as I got back and we ran to the King’s chambers and I threw the mandrake root in the fire to break the enchantment. Morgana was obviously less than pleased that I had survived.”

“I’m sorry that happened to you.” Lancelot said, placing a hand on his shoulder. 

“Let’s move on. You lot keep picking darker and darker topics. What do you got, Arthur?”

“Um. Alright never have I ever spent the night in the tavern.” Arthur looks quite smug as he says this. Of course Gwaine drinks. When Elyan, Leon, and Percival drink, Arthur cocks an eyebrow at them. 

“Uh, we lost a bet with Gwaine. So not entirely our fault” Elyan says trying to justify himself. 

“Why didn’t you drink Merlin? Aren’t you always in the tavern?” Arthur asks.

“Who is it that always tells you I’m in the tavern?” Merlin asks innocently, trying not to smile.

“Gaius, mostly. Though when I talk to you, you usually say you were out collecting herbs. So. Which is it? The tavern, or herbs?” Arthur asks, looking intently at him. 

“Most of the time it’s herbs. Some of the time, like with Morgana and Morgause, it’s not easy to explain.” He finishes meeting his Kings eyes.

“And you never once thought to tell me any of this?” Arthur asked, hurt now clear in his voice.

“It’s not your burden to bear, Arthur. Most of the time I have no proof and I’m only a servant so I can’t go around telling you all the things I’ve managed to intercept. It would be my word against theirs.” Merlin pauses. “You’re my King, Arthur, and I’d gladly lay down my life for you. I believe in the world you will build. If I can play any part in making sure you succeed, I will do it.” Merlin answers, maintaining eye contact so he knows his words sink in. 

“You know, you don’t have to bear these things alone, mate. If anyone is out to get you, they are out to get us. We protect our own.” Gwaine said looking over to make sure Merlin understood. 

“Thanks. I appreciate it. I do have to say this has been better than my usual birthdays. Even with the occasional dark turn in conversation. Thank you all, for making me feel a little less alone in this world. Cheers!” Merlin lifts his drink as do the others. As Merlin takes his drink he realizes he’s empty. “Well, I guess that’s the end of that game. Anyone else have a suggestion?” He looks around at the group. “Alright, well while you think, nature is calling, I’ll be right back.” He stumbled a little as he got up, earning some chuckles and whistles from the group before making his way into the woods. 

********

Balin and his crew sat silently waiting and watching as the King and his knights set about catering to a servant. How odd. From what he has been able to learn, this servant has been by his King’s side through many years and many battles. As he watched the servant got up and wandered into the woods seeming to answer a call of nature. Seeing him stumble, he could tell the drink was having its effect. Before long all the knights and the King would be unconscious and ripe for the taking. This servant though. Something about him had these nobles scraping to him. He knew the best way to control them, would be through the boy. He would be the key. 

“Grab the boy. Once we have him, we’ll have the rest under control”. 

Two of his men head off towards where the boy was. All of a sudden a wave of shock flowed over him. He had to grab the tree to steady himself. That was strange. About like the other waves that had been working their way across the country. Unfortunately, the knights and the King felt it too and were suddenly much less intoxicated. One jumped up and headed into the woods where the boy had gone, calling for him. The others were grabbing their swords and following in case of a fight. As Balin watched the Knight rushed back to the camp with the boy's limp form in his arms. His head was bleeding, but he seemed otherwise unharmed. They put him on a blanket in front of the fire while the large brute tended to his wound to ensure he would be ok. Hmm. It appears he will have to wait a little longer to collect his prize. 

“Go to Gregor and see if he can have a dozen or so men here by dawn.” He sent the last man with him on his way and continued watching this strange group of men. 

“Lancelot, what happened?” Arthur asks him. 

“I’m not sure, Sire. I found him on the ground and there were a couple swords nearby. It’s like someone attacked him, but then dropped their weapons and ran off. You felt it, didn’t you? That panic? Or whatever it was?” 

“We all felt it. I wonder what caused it…” Percival trailed off looking at Lancelot. “Anyway, his injury is not terrible, he will need to rest and should wake fine in the morning. Though he will probably have a headache.” 

“Alright, take shifts keeping watch in case it was someone who knocked Merlin out and not himself”. Arthur said walking over to his bed roll. 

“I’ll take the first watch,” Elyan stated. At that Leon and Gwaine went to their places and lay down as well. Processing all that had been said this day. Lancelot sat next to Merlin, and Percival sat nearby as if checking on his patient. 

“You know something.” Percival said while adjusting a bandage.

“I know many things my friend. To what are you referring?” 

“That energy, or wave, or whatever it was. It came from him, didn’t it? Merlin?” Percival said not looking up.

“What do you know of this?”

“Not much. Bits and pieces picked up from living with the Druids for a time. They have prophecies of one who is born of magic. But not just born of it, they are the embodiment of magic itself. Destined to help the Once and Future King bring about peace and unite the land.” Percival looked up, settling back into a seated position. He grinned at the shocked look on Lancelot’s face. “I know that you’ve always considered him special. The way you spoke of him, was always caring and awed. I do pick up things. So go on. Fill in some blanks for me.”

“Well. All that you said is true. I went to Gaius’ chambers yesterday morning before dawn as I wanted to wish Merlin a happy birthday early before the tournament began. When I got there, I’ve never seen anything like it. The plants and herbs that Gaius keeps were all in the air and growing roots and maturing right in front of my eyes. Books were in the air, the fire was changing colors, and a soft golden light was coming off of his sleeping form. I’ve never seen such a peaceful look on his face. So pure, and innocent. As the sun crested the horizon a wave of golden light sort of burst out of him and everything that was in the air went back to its resting spot and the fire was nothing but cinders. When he opened his eyes they were golden. He wasn’t doing anything just waking up. And they stayed that way all day. That’s why Gaius kept him indoors. When the games were over I went in to check on him. When I went in he was sitting with his head down taking many deep breaths and he congratulated me on my win, though he shouldn’t have known. He could sense everything around. Smell, sight, sound, touch, it was all amplified for him. We have a theory it may have had something to do with his birthday but that’s only a guess. He is more powerful and more, just more, than anyone I’ve ever met. And I will protect him, no matter the cost.” Lancelot finishes looking up to the gentle giant’s eyes. 

“I will do the same. You have my word. That first wave, it was so pure. It was the most amazing feeling I’ve ever experienced. I will do all that I can to ensure his safety and protection.” At that final statement the two sat there watching the fire die down and thinking. Each their own thoughts, but both centered on this amazing young warlock.

Merlin woke slowly and seemed to have trouble opening his eyes. He reached up to his head and realized it was bandaged. What happened? He remembered getting up to go relieve himself, but something happened. Bandits! He was knocked out by bandits! He needed to warn the others! He felt himself start to panic and he couldn’t order his thoughts. His breathing became harsh. It was as if he couldn’t get enough air. Before he could be consumed by this feeling, he felt a strong hand on his shoulder and turned to see Lancelot and Percival sitting up and looking at him. 

“Merlin, you need to calm down. Remember what to do? Deep breaths.” Lancelot urged him. Right. Of course slow deep breaths. With the steadiness and strength of his friend he took several slow deep breaths and when he was finally calm again he opened his eyes again. He hoped he didn’t expel too much magic. What a terrible way to be found out. 

“What happened, Lance?” He asked.

“A burst of energy hit us and I knew something had to have happened to you. I found you with swords nearby. It looked like someone tried to knock you out, but your magic reacted and the wave of panic you sent out must have sent them running for the hills. I brought you back to the camp. You’ve been resting now for a few hours. It’s still some time until dawn, so you should try and get some more rest.”

“That’s not a bad idea.” Percival said, looking concerned.

“Um, Lance. What’s going on?” Merlin asks guardedly. 

“Don’t worry Merlin. Percival figured a few things out and drew his own conclusions. You can trust him.” Lancelot says with conviction. 

“Sorry for not telling you sooner Perc. Didn’t want to put you in a hard spot.”

“No need to apologize.” With a nod from Percival, Merlin lay his head back down and closed his eyes again, hoping for more rest. Merlin was awake at first light feeling only a slight headache, but overall refreshed. He snuck around while the others were still sleeping and started making breakfast. The others had slowly started to wake and come ‘round smelling the food. 

“Morning, Merlin. How are you?” Gwaine says walking over to him giving him a hug. 

“I’m fine, Gwaine.” Merlin says smiling at him. 

“Good to hear!” Gwaine patted Merlin on the shoulder. Merlin then proceeded to start packing up some of the sleeping bundles in preparations for heading back to Camelot. 


	3. Escape

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> WARNING! Some torture and description of intent to harm and unwanted touch.

A branch snapped nearby causing the group to tense and glance around in preparation for an attack. Sure enough there were more cracks and snaps as if they were being surrounded. Arthur was up in a second sword in hand. Suddenly Leon was thrown into the midst of the group with blood smeared down his face. That explained why there was no warning. They went for the sentry first. Leon groaned and attempted to rise to fight. Unfortunately he had a worse head wound than Merlin had the previous night. He was most likely concussed. A yell echoed as they were surrounded by at least a dozen men. The Knights leapt into the fray along with their King. Merlin went to Leon to check him over and do what he could to get him back to fighting condition. Before he could do anything else he yelped as a hand was grabbing his hair and he was being pulled up to his feet with a dagger at his throat. Lancelot and Percival froze as they took in the scene. The man holding Merlin had started to drag the blade across his neck leaving a trail of blood dripping to his neckerchief causing Merlin to gasp in pain. 

“I hope I have your attention now.” The man said. The fighting paused.

“Let him go. He’s of no consequence to you.” Arthur bargained. 

“Ah, but you see, you are wrong. Because having watched you all, I can see how much this little one means to you. So. You are going to come along nicely, or you can watch as I find new places to put this dagger.” 

“Don’t do it!” Merlin tried yelling to them but I came out as more of a cough as the bandit pressed the dagger harder to his neck causing him to gasp in pain again.

The Knights and the King all put their weapons down. It was expected, but still surprising. What had this little one done to have such loyal friends? He would get his answers, sooner rather than later. He always did. His men bound the hands of the Camelotians. Balin then made them watch as the boy’s hands were bound and he was gagged and blindfolded. He then pulled the boy up on his horse so he was always within reach and away from his friends. They tied the others all in a line and marched them off toward their encampment. Gregor was waiting, and this would be worth his wait. This tactic would keep his captives in line. They wouldn’t risk escaping while the boy was in danger. And so they went. By midday they had reached Gregor’s hideout. The prisoners were all marched down to the cells and locked up. Holding on to the boy and drawing a bit more blood ensured that they all moved without attempting anything. He then took the boy to a much larger empty cell at the end and chained his hands above his head, arms spread wide, feet barely touching the ground. The whole time the knights and the King were cursing him and threatening a multitude of harms if he touched the boy. He kept the gag on and sent one of his men to fetch Gregor. After a few moments, Gregor entered the cells to admire his prizes. 

“Well, Balin! It seems you have outdone yourself! King Arthur of Camelot. You’ll fetch quite the nice price, I do believe. As for your knights, well, I’m sure someone would pay nicely for them.”

“Do what you want with us, but let my servant go. He’s of no consequence to you.” Arthur seethed, barely keeping his anger down. 

“Your servant?” At this, Gregor looked over to where Balin was standing next to the boy he had chained up. “If he’s of no consequence, then my brother wouldn’t have wasted his time. So there must be something about him.” Gregor sauntered over, grabbed Merlin’s face, pulling off the blindfold, and examining him better. Then he started walking around him like he was appraising property, running his hands along the boy’s frame, a predatory gleam in his eyes. “What say you Balin? Is this boy of consequence?”

“They will do anything to protect him. They only came as swiftly as they did as I threatened the boy. Once they saw he was in danger they all lay down their arms.” Balin stated flatly.

“Interesting. So,  _ boy _ . What makes you special?” Gregor asks, stroking a hand down Merlin’s cheek before reaching back and smacking him across the face. Angry shouts came from the others, though there was nothing they could do. A large red handprint slowly made its way across the boy’s features. Gregor swung again, this time putting a fist in the boy’s stomach. More threats from the others. Seeing how upset this made the King and his Knights gave Gregor a strange sort of glee. He reached up and backhanded the boy. This time he had drawn blood. The boy didn’t react though. He didn’t try to hide, or dodge away. He simply stood there and took the beating. Strange. Gregor turned to leave and stopped in front of the others’ cell. “The more noise you make the more he’s going to bleed. Something you may want to keep in mind,  _ highness _ .” At that he went upstairs and prepared to send word of the prisoners he now possessed. 

Balin stayed and circled the boy. He was taller than the boy by at least half a head. He was trying to riddle out what made him so special. Nothing came to mind. After watching the group for several hours, he had no conclusion. They all simply cared deeply for him. Almost like he was their little brother. Then it clicked. That’s exactly how they saw him. This boy was their little brother. And big brothers will do anything to protect their little brothers. He should know. His brother often thought the same way. Though he was the older and did what he could to protect his younger brother, sometimes there was no stopping the wildness in his younger brother. This boy did not contain that wildness. He had a calm that seeped through to his bones. It was almost chilling to witness. As he walked behind the boy he could hear the others trying to protest. The oddest thing happened, then. The boy looked to the others and simply shook his head. As if saying  _ don’t. _ They backed down. Interesting. Balin trailed his dagger along the boys back causing him to tense. He could almost hear a growl coming from the other cell. He walked back around to the front of the boy and drug his dagger across the pretty face, slowly. From just above his eyebrow down to his jawline. The boy winced and groaned and the blood started to run. Balin wiped the dagger on the boy’s shirt and left the room to join Gregor. 

As the bandits walked off, leaving a few guards at the entrance, Merlin tried to get the gag off and failed. He needed to be able to talk to the others to keep them calm. His head was swimming due to the new injuries and blood loss. He looked up and met Lancelot’s eyes. Lancelot was trying to tell him to break free. He could see it plainly on his face. But he was finding it hard to keep his eyes open. Seeing this, Lancelot kept trying to say his name. But he couldn’t focus. He could see Arthur and the others working to find a way out.  _ You shouldn’t have dropped your weapons just for me _ . He said to Lancelot through his mind. He saw the man react, so he knew he got the message. He didn’t get anything back but it was written across his face. He would not do anything to risk Merlin’s life.  _ You need to protect the King. He is the priority. _ He could see that Lancelot got that message but didn’t agree to it.  _ Perc, if you get the chance to escape, you must get Arthur to safety. _ At that the big man had come over to stand by Lancelot looking over at him. 

“Lance, did he just speak in my mind?” He whispered.

“Yes. He wants us to get Arthur to safety and leave him. Stubborn as always.” Lancelot responded. 

Merlin just rolled his eyes.  _ If you keep focused on me like this, Arthur will know something is up. He already has some suspicions. _ At that, the two turned slightly to join in with the others' plans of escape. Merlin used this time to glance around the area he was in. Why was he still gagged? They removed the blindfold but not the gag? Oh. They didn’t want him reassuring the others. Comforting them. They had watched them. But, why? Why didn’t they just try to nab Arthur and ransom him? How did he end up the target? One thing was certain, he would never hear the end of this. This was going to be another reason they would want him to train with them and start wearing armor and everything. Ugh. His mind was still kind of muddled as he couldn’t seem to reach out for his magic.  _ I know you want me to just break out of here, but I can’t. My mind isn’t clear and I don’t know what would happen. _ He sees Lance nod in acknowledgement, though he can tell his friend is still anxious. He closes his eyes then and takes a few deep breaths. After that last breath, he feels a release. Not on the shackles, but his magic. The others felt it too, Lancelot and Percival both looked to Merlin. He tried to shrug but couldn’t due to his current position. 

“Gregor.” Balin called. 

“Yes, brother? Something you need?” Grego asked cautiously. 

“I don’t know. That boy. There’s something about him. I can’t put my finger on it. I’d like to spend some… quality time with him. Perhaps in private, away from his companions. What say you?”

Gregor chuckled as he looked at his brother. “I’ve sent word to Odin that we have a guest for him. He’ll be here tomorrow night to collect. Take the boy, but be sure to put him back worse than you got him.” 

“Of course.”

Heading back down to the cells, he felt another wave of energy wash over him. He could hear the Knights and King attempting to make an escape plan. As Balin entered the cells the talking ceased and they eyed him with contempt and anger. Though when they saw him continue on down to their little brother they all tensed and grabbed at the bars. Blood had drenched the front of the boy’s shirt from the cuts on his face and neck. It was starting to dry, but only just. He looked up then and held Balin’s gaze. He could sense no fear in him. Only resolve. How curious. He walked over to the boy and ran his hands over his arms, then his chest. The boy tensed, not wanting the touch, but that’s why Balin felt compelled to do it. He walked behind the boy and felt down his back all the way down to the top of his slim, narrow hips. The boy was shaking slightly, and wriggling to try to get the hands off of him. 

“It’s time you and I had some alone time.” Balin whispered in the boy’s ear, feeling him shiver against the breath that brushed against him. Then, Balin walked over to the wall and pressed a lever that closed a section of wall so the others could no longer see or hear the boy. At this his eyes widened and he pulled at his restraints, while the others started shouting in earnest. Knowing the last thing they saw was utter fear from the boy made him grin. Balin drank in the fear he saw in the boy. It fueled him. He took the gag off now standing barely a hand’s-breadth from the lean body. The boy tried to back away but with his feet barely touching the ground there was nowhere he could go. Balin simply moved closer, close enough his chest was against the boy. He could tell standing this close to him made him uncomfortable. Balin walked around the boy again, and watched as he tried to keep his eyes on his potential tormentor, failing as Balin came to stand behind him brushing the hair from his neck. The boy stiffened. 

“What is it you want with me?” The boy asked, somehow keeping his voice even.

“You intrigue me. There’s just something about you. Something…special. The way that those nobles out there treat you is proof enough. They all seem to care an awful lot about you.” 

“I’m just a servant. There’s nothing special about me.” He lies. Though it’s a lie he has practiced. He has said it enough times that unless you were familiar with lying, you would believe it. 

“I think we both know that’s not true. Not that it matters. I don’t really care why they care so much for you. BUT. I know how much it will hurt them, if something were to happen to you.” Balin ran his hands along the boys’ shoulders again and down his back feeling him tense up. “I am very good at what I do. And what I do is take things apart. Pull out the secrets. What secrets must the servant to a King possess?” He whispers in his ear standing directly behind him, hands on his hips holding them firmly in place. Though, that was merely a taunt. There is nothing he needed to know about this King or his Knights. He came around to face the boy again, dragging his hands across this body feeling him struggle to keep from tensing, to look in his eyes. “Doing anything to you, right now, will drive your friends mad. They won’t be able to reach you.” 

“As long as they are safe from harm, then you can do what you want to me. I will never tell you anything.” There’s a fire in his soul. It would be very rewarding to extinguish it. 

Balin backed away towards the wall that had opened up behind them when the other wall closed. He liked to keep an assortment of tools on hand in case any of their guests needed persuading to share what they knew. He wanted to hear this boy scream. Nothing more, nothing less. He grabbed the whip that had metal barbs on the end. Without warning he turned and struck out at the boys back with it. Merlin tried not to scream but it still came out. Balin struck again, this time he didn’t fight the scream. Good. It only hurt worse when they held it in. The slaver lashed out now, rage suddenly taking hold. Ten times the boy was struck. The boy’s shirt was now a bloody mess. He was hanging from his manacles, not able to hold his weight anymore. Going back to the table he placed the whip down. He knew the longer he was kept here, the more he hurt the boy, the more the Camelot King and his Knights were hurt. 

“What is it that makes you so special?” He asks while grabbing the brand, heating it over a small torch set by the tools. It wasn’t much. Just a letter B with a crown tilted on it. It was a slave brand. 

“There’s nothing special about me.” It was so quiet Balin almost missed it. 

Hmm. He hadn’t expected an answer. He tore the neckerchief the boy wore off and threw it to the ground. Balin held his face and turned it away placing his brand on the right side of his neck. Where it could always be seen. This warranted another scream, much worse than when he was whipped. Oh how he enjoyed this. Returning the brand to its place he circled the boy admiring the work. The boy was whimpering now. He grabbed the boy’s face and looked into it. 

“Why is it, you are so cared for? What is it about you that makes Knights and a King, want to please you?” He walked around the boy again trying to decide the next course of action. The boys’ face was already ruined with the slash made earlier. He slapped the boy across the face. When he opened his eyes, Balin could see the fire still burning in the boy’s eyes. He grabbed a thin blade and pressed it slowly into the boy’s hand. He didn’t scream this time. The boy bit his lip trying not to cry out as Balin drove the blade all the way through his hand. Blood ran down his arm. Merlin’s eyes closed, he wasn’t able to keep them open any more. Balin slapped him again. His eyes fluttered open, briefly, but closed again. Seems he did a little too much all at once this time. It had been almost two hours. But, that’s what happens when he’s too anxious. No matter. The goal was still accomplished. The others would be devastated by these results. “I’ll be back in a few hours.Then we can continue our conversation,” He said and walked over and pulled the lever re-opening the wall and left him and his companions. 

Arthur was losing his mind. That man had come in, and slid a wall between them and Merlin. He knew nothing good could come of this. He was rewarded with the sound of a whip cracking and a scream that tore through his mind. The others felt it too. Everyone had tensed. Ten times. Ten times that whip had cracked and Merlin had cried out. He could feel tears welling up but he would not let them out. He would not be weak right now. Merlin needed them. Then came the worst scream of them all. It was awful. Arthur was certain it would definitely haunt him the most. The wall opened up and the man just walked away. Merlin wasn’t moving. He was hanging from his wrists, unable to stand. There was an angry burn on his neck. A brand. He had branded Merlin and then left a dagger in his hand!

“Merlin!” He couldn’t help it. He had to hear his voice. 

“Yes?” came a weak barely audible reply. 

“Merlin you need to hang in there. We will get out of here.” He said it with as much conviction as he could muster. At that the raven-haired boy nodded and either went to sleep or passed out. Arthur couldn’t tell. They needed to get him out of here. When night had fallen, the man called Balin reappeared in the cells. He leaned against the cell opposite the King and just watched. 

“Tell me”, Balin said, “How is it that a servant can garner so much loyalty?” 

“You wouldn’t understand.” Was all Arthur could get out.

“Perhaps. I watched you all though. You played some silly game and recounted some adventures. Strange that a servant would be in the midst of all that. I wonder how it is he survived?”

Having no answer, Arthur stayed silent. He could feel the others glaring at the man. 

“Have you noticed anything strange about him? Anything special?” Lancelot tensed beside Arthur. Balin caught it.

“You. You know something about him. Hmm. I wonder if you’ve seen the fire in his eyes.” He said as he leaned in. “I’m interested in dampening that fire. I will find out what it is you are trying to conceal. One way or another. Every man has a breaking point. I will find his. And in finding his, I will find yours.” At that he turned to walk back towards Merlin. 

“No!” Arthur yelled. 

There was a loud crash all of a sudden. Percival had slammed so hard against the cell door that it had broken off. Balin hadn’t been expecting that and the Knights were able to subdue the slaver and toss him into another cell. Arthur rushed out to get to Merlin. He was still breathing but he was bleeding everywhere. They managed to get the manacles off which caused Merlin to wince in response to his shoulders coming back down. Lancelot carefully pulled the blade free from Merlin’s hand. Leon and Elyan appeared with Swords they had taken off the guards. Without a word Percival picked Merlin up over his shoulder and the group made their escape as quiet as possible.  _ Stop _ . Arthur froze, as did the others looking around in confusion. It was as if someone was speaking in their minds. It felt…familiar for some reason. Lancelot shared a look with Percival.  _ Go right at the top of the stairs, quickly! _ Skeptical, they all followed the instructions barely pausing to consider where they were coming from.  _ Take this corridor then follow the stairs down, there is a door at the bottom that leads to some stables. Go, now! _ Once in the open, the Knights and the King took the horses and raced off back towards the direction of their camp and Camelot. They rode hard, through the night, stopping only long enough to grab a blanket to throw around Merlin to try to protect his injuries. They reached Camelot by mid-morning and wasted no time getting Merlin up to Gaius’ chambers. As soon as they burst in the door and Gaius saw the limp and paling figure Percival carried he snapped into physician mode. Ordering everyone about to collect water and get blankets. Percival set Merlin down on the patient cot face down. Gaius’ face dropped when he saw the damage done. 

“My boy, what happened…” it was barely above a whisper. 

“We were attacked. Slavers. They said they had watched us and when the fighting started they went straight for Merlin while he was trying to help Leon. They knew holding Merlin would keep us under control. They separated us and when we saw him again…” Arthur couldn’t finish his thought, he had started to see red again and wanted heads to roll for this. 

“I need to clean the wounds, help me cut away what’s left of his shirt.” 

Lancelot was there slicing a dagger through the fabric with ease. Once the shirt was clear of his back, Gaius started cleaning with a wet cloth. When all the blood seemed to be cleaned up, the others caught their first real glimpse at some of the scars he was trying to hide. There were so many. Any one of them could have been fatal, but he was still here. How had they missed these? While the men were all stuck staring, Gaius had already started putting a salve on each lash mark. Once the salve was in place, he put bandages on to protect from further infection. Then he moved to clean the cut on his face. He had Percival help sit him up so that he could give him a potion for the pain. As soon as he swallowed it, his body relaxed. There was a strange wave of relief that washed out over everyone.  _ Thank you. _ They looked around at each other. Had that come from Merlin? 

“You’ll let us know the moment he’s awake?” Arthur asked Gaius anxiously. 

“Of course, Sire.”

“Percival, stick around and help Gaius as best you can. Everyone else, let’s get cleaned up and try to get some rest. We won’t do Merlin any good if we’re all still dirty and tired when he wakes up.” At that Arthur ushered his knights out the door leaving Gaius and Percival to watch over their patient. Percival nodded to Lancelot as he left the room. 

Percival sat vigilant next to Merlin’s side, wiping his brow with a cool wet rag. Gaius would come over and fuss occasionally, replacing the bandages with fresh ones when warranted. Percival looked up at the worried older man as he finished replacing the last bandage. “You know about him, don’t you?”

Gaius looked up at this statement. “I know a great many things about him, is there something particular you are referring to?”

“His magic.” Percival said flatly.

Gaius merely sighed. “Yes. I know.”

“He’s been here protecting Arthur all these years. And Arthur has no idea, does he?”

“No. He doesn’t. I’ve bandaged up Merlin more times than I care to count, and every time he just goes on with his day as if nothing happened. As if he hadn’t just barely escaped death.” Gaius was speaking very quietly now.

“I know his burden. I will do everything I can to protect him. Lance and I, we will not let him feel alone. He has so much goodness and love in him. He has been such a wonderful friend, I don’t think anything I can do will ever repay him for what he has given me. But I swear I will try.” 

Gaius smiles, though a bit sadly, patting Percival on the arm. “Arthur will know one day. Until then we do what we can.”

A peaceful silence settled over them. Percival had pulled a book over and was looking through it when he noticed that the room was a little brighter. He turned to see if the sun was rising, but it was dark. When he turned back towards Merlin, he gasped dropping his book and nearly fell over his stool. Merlin was glowing. A soft golden light was spread over the boy. “Gaius?” Percival called. Gaius appeared a moment later rushing over to his ward. Merlin gasped eyes opening wide revealing his normally blue eyes, golden. Merlin’s body tensed and then with a rush of energy, he lay still and relaxed once more. Gaius checked for any signs of fever and then moved on to check the bandages. When he removed them, all that remained were more scars. The wounds had healed. His face, his neck, his back, the wounds were all now scars and all looked much older than they possibly could be. Percival and Gaius just looked at each other. 

“There is not going to be a way to explain this to Arthur.” Percival said quietly. 

“No there is not…” Gaius was trying to think. “I think it is time Merlin had a trip home, to Ealdor, to recover. Spend some time with his mother. If he’s out of sight, at least it won’t cause the King to notice too much.” 

“Lance and I will accompany him. I’ll let the King know that it would be better for Merlin’s health if he had some time off to recover from his ordeal at home.” At that Percival nodded to Gaius and headed out. 

*********

Arthur sat in his chambers unable to sleep. Maybe if they hadn’t shown how much they all cared for Merlin he could have been spared. All he had wanted to do was give his friend a good birthday memory. And now? Now it was yet another day of pain for him. Pain. He had never felt such pain as seeing his friend lying on the patient cot with his shirt cut open revealing so many scars along with the fresh injuries. Had those happened since he had been in Camelot? How could he have missed those? How much was Merlin hiding from him? He thought he knew him. But all he really knows is how he can’t make it through a day without his friend offering some sort of advice or bantering with him. His smile always manages to cheer him up, though he’ll never admit it to Merlin’s face. And after Merlin had gotten the medicine. He swears he heard a thank you in his head that sounded like Merlin. And that wave of relief that washed over him? It happened at the same time Merlin got the medicine. That couldn’t be a coincidence, could it? That voice that guided them out of the bandits’ hideout… It was the same as the thank you. But that would mean magic was at play, right? And magic, according to his father, was evil and it corrupted. But Merlin wasn’t evil. He was so pure and innocent. Maybe…maybe not all magic is bad? He started as a hand suddenly reached out and touched his shoulder. Looking up he saw it was Guinevere. He rested his hand on hers looking into her eyes. 

“What’s troubling you?” she asked concernedly.

“So many things. At the moment? I was wondering about… Well about magic actually.” He paused. 

“Yes?” Gwen encouraged.

“Do you think all magic is evil? That those who practice are all corrupt?” He asked, uncertainly.

“I’m not sure. Magic has been outlawed and your father waged a war that lasted over 20 years. How many people did he kill that may have used their powers to heal? Or to mend or grow crops? I don’t know what I feel about magic. If you ask around, the people will tell you they believe the waves of energy that went through the citadel during the tournament were magic. If that is magic, I could easily embrace it. It felt so comforting and warm. Like love. Maybe it was magic that took away what your father loved and for that he blamed all those with magic. We all do crazy things in grief. But if you’re willing to take counsel with those you trust, then you are already a more wise and just ruler.”

“How is it, you always know what to say?” Arthur asks looking up at her lovingly. 

“I don’t. But you are easy to talk to.” At this she patted his hand and turned to leave again. 

“Thank you, Guinevere.” Arthur calls to her. She just smiles back at him before leaving the room. Feeling a little more at ease, Arthur got out of his clothes and climbed in bed to get a few hours of sleep. 


	4. Rested

The weeks following the event that was meant to be a celebration for Merlin, were filled with patrols and many arrests of slavers and thieves. Though not those that had captured the group. They had managed to evade all patrols. Arthur had a knighting ceremony at least weekly, and he was having to make due, through all of it, without Merlin. He often found his thoughts turned to Merlin during his council meetings. He’d look over his shoulder for a smile of encouragement or word of advice, to find the space empty. He knew it was for the best. Gaius had said that some time off at home should help Merlin to heal completely. Percival and Lancelot had rode out to Ealdor with him to ensure his safe arrival. After a few days, they had returned, but without Merlin. Lancelot had told him that he wasn’t ready to come back just yet. But he did plan to. Merlin had given a letter to Lancelot to give to Arthur. It didn’t say much, just that he promised to come back soon so the prat shouldn’t worry. And that he’d send word ahead when he was ready to come back. The Knights were all subdued as well. Arthur hadn’t realized how much they all relied on his smile, his snarky comebacks, or his ability to just talk to everyone as equals. He knew that Lancelot and Percival were hiding something, but he hadn’t had time to work out what it was. His Uncle Aggravaine gave sound advice, but it wasn’t the same. 

“Arthur?” Aggravaine asked.

He hadn’t realized his uncle was speaking until then. “Sorry, Uncle, what can I do for you?”

“Are you well, Sire?” he questioned back. 

“Fine. Just thinking. Is there something you needed?”

“I just wanted to check about preparations for the Samhain Feast. It is fast approaching, and I wondered if you intended to continue the tradition? Since you are breaking many traditions such as the addition of commoners to the knights.”

Arthur could tell his uncle was still bitter about this, but he refused to acknowledge the statement. “We will hold a feast and uphold the tradition. But, it is, as you said, still a ways off. Is that all?”

“I should think so. The patrols have cleared the woods and it appears as if you either arrested or scared off all the bandits that were responsible for your capture. They are nowhere to be found.”

“That’s great news. Keep up the patrols for a few more weeks. We need to ensure our people know that their safety and well-being are my priority.”

“Of course, Sire.” He bows slightly and leaves Arthur alone with his thoughts. Maybe heading to the training grounds will help him focus. At the least he knows it will help relieve some stress. George helps him into his armor and he heads out to meet the knights already sparring. 

“Nice of you to join us for a change, Princess! We were beginning to think you forgot about us” Gwaine yells across the field. Arthur can’t help but smirk at this. 

“What have I said about calling me that, Gwaine?”

“I forget.” He says with a broad smile. 

“Alright then, I’ll help it sink in a bit more.” They sparred and Arthur started to feel better getting back into the rhythm of an everyday task that he always enjoyed. After Gwaine and him fought, Lancelot and Leon fought, followed by Elyan and Percival. More had paired up after, including the new additions of Sir Corbett and Sir Eoin, and kept the energy going. 

“I think this successful training session requires a celebration!” Gwaine stated. 

Arthur readied himself to argue and quickly changed my mind. “You know what, you are absolutely right. Let’s all get a drink tonight.” 

“Very well. Drinks tonight it is.” Leon says smiling. 

The men part ways to head to their rooms to change and have dinner before heading out. They all head down to the tavern together making light hearted conversation. When they got to a table Gwaine was already bringing drinks over and passing them out. It was nice getting out and being around the knights again. They helped fill the void that had been left by Merlin. Naturally as soon as Arthur thought this, he felt his smile falter and looked down to the table hoping no one noticed. 

“We all miss him,” Lancelot says. Arthur looks up at him a bit surprised he knew what he was thinking. When he looked at each of their faces he could see the same sadness that he felt. Arthur simply nods. 

“Did you know the first time I met him, he took a swing at me?” Arthur said to the group. They all looked shocked. 

“Don’t hold out on us,” Gwaine insisted. 

“I was training with some of my father's knights, this was, what, maybe five years ago now? Anyway, we may have been a little rough with the servant who was moving the target. I was practicing throwing daggers at the target when he dropped it and it rolled away, and this gangly, pale, big-eared, boy stops it and tells me ‘that’s enough’. I’d never been told no at this point so hearing some stranger say it made me a bit angry. He said ‘you’ve had your fun my friend’. I said, ‘do I know you?’ he said ‘I’m Merlin’. I responded ‘so I don’t know you’. He said no and then I said ‘yet, you called me friend’. Well you know Merlin, he never knows when to shut up. He said, ‘that was my mistake’. And I agreed. Then he looks me in the eyes and says ‘I’d never have a friend that could be such an ass’.” Arthur had to pause laughing at the memory. The knights were laughing as well.

“I can’t believe he said that!” Elyan laughed, looking shocked. 

“Of course that wasn’t the end of it. I said, ‘nor I one who could be so stupid’. I said something along the lines of ‘do you know how to walk on your knees?’ He of course said no. So I said, ‘do you want me to help you?’ You know what he said? He looks me in the eyes ‘I wouldn’t if I were you’.” I laughed again remembering his face. “I said ‘what are you gonna do to me?’ and he responds with ‘you have no idea’! So naturally I egg him on and he just takes a swing at me! Didn’t hit me of course, but he tried.”

“I’m definitely bringing this up when he gets back!” Gwaine says. Everyone just keeps laughing until they fall in to companionable silence. Still smiling at the idea of  _ Merlin _ trying to hit  _ Arthur _ . 

“Oh my god!” Arthur exclaims. They all look at him. “He was only 15 when he tried to hit me!”

“You’re right!” Leon says. “Brave little bugger, I’ll give him that. You know, after he saved you from that dagger, you became a different person. Better. You didn’t act like a spoiled child anymore. He balanced you out, I think. Treated you like a person and not a prince. Did you some good, I do believe.”

“Come on, I wasn’t that bad!” Arthur said incredulously. Leon just took a drink and mumbled, under his breath. “What?”

“I said, if you say so, Sire.” Leon repeated louder. The others just chuckled. They hadn’t known Arthur as long as Leon or even Merlin. 

“You know if it wasn’t for Merlin, I don’t think we all would be sitting here together.” Lancelot adds. 

“I’m not sure that’s true.” Arthur started to say.

“Well I know I wouldn’t be.” Lancelot says sincerely.

“Nor I. I’d probably be in another tavern in another town if not for him. He’s the one who convinced me to come back, a few times actually. He was the first real friend I’d had.” Gwaine put in, trying to hide a blush behind his drink. 

“I don’t know how much of my being here would or wouldn’t be affected by Merlin. I know how we met, but not really the why behind it.” Elyan says.

“What do you mean?” Percival asks. 

“Well, I had been working in a forge in Cenred’s Kingdom, he kidnapped me and brought me to a castle and when I got there, he had me and Gwen in what I guess was a throne room. He had kidnapped me to get to her, then kidnapped her, to get to Arthur. He let her go back to Camelot telling her to bring Arthur to him. I was sure I was a dead man.”

“I had sent Merlin to look for Gwen that morning when she didn’t turn up for work. He came back after finding some sort of cloth that was soaked in something that we believed was used to knock her out so they could take her. She told me she had bumped in to Merlin the next day while taking clothes to wash and dropped them. He spotted the rope burns on her wrist and took her home so she could talk to him. Then they came to me. We had a plan to sneak into the castle, but somehow Cenred’s men knew we were in the hidden tunnels under the castle and they quickly overtook us. Merlin and I escaped the cell we were tossed in, we got Elyan and Gwen out of their cell and headed back towards the tunnels. I should have just gone instead of going back for Morgana, but I didn’t know it was her who planned the whole charade. Anyway I ran to the throne room to try to rescue Morgana but Morgause came out from behind a pillar and sent a column of fire towards me. I don’t know what happened but it exploded and the ceiling started coming down. I grabbed Morgana and turned to see Merlin standing in the door. Naturally I yelled at him, but he just took Morgana by the arm and pulled her through the tunnels. If Merlin hadn’t found Gwen with the marks on her wrist, I’m not sure what would have happened to you.” Arthur finished. He had noticed Lancelot and Percival share a glance when he talked about the column of fire exploding. He’d have to ask about that later. 

“Well, it seems I wouldn’t be here without Merlin either.” Elyan says. 

“Toast! To Merlin. May he have a swift recovery and get his ass back quickly!” Gwaine says raising his drink. 

“Merlin!” Everyone cheers and finishes their drinks. 

“Think it’s time to call it a night, boys.” Arthur says standing up to leave. The others join and they make their way back to the castle. Having had a good night reminiscing about Merlin put everyone in a better mood and made it much easier to sleep that night. 

*********

Merlin was sitting in his mother’s house enjoying dinner with her when he noticed she was looking at him. “Mother?”

“Merlin. I have loved having you here these past weeks, but you are needed in Camelot. I think it’s time you went back. Arthur needs you.”

“I know. I’m still not sure I have all that much control yet. My magic is still reacting to things I think or feelings that are very strong. I’m not sure I can hide it.”

She puts her hand on his on the table. “Love. You will be fine. If he finds out about your gift, and can’t accept you, then you can always come back. I can’t promise you anything exciting. No grand feasts or towering city walls. But this will always be your home.”

“Thanks, mother. I’ll send word to Lance. It’ll give Lance and Percy time to get here. If I try to go on my own I have a feeling they’ll never let me hear the end of it.”

“Good. They are good friends. I’m glad you have them.”

“Me too.” After they ate, they cleaned the dishes and walked for a bit enjoying the crisp air and starry night. When his mother went to bed, he stayed up and wrote a letter to Lancelot. When he was done he folded up the paper and held it for a minute, wondering. Holding the letter on his flattened palm he concentrated on one thing, well, one name.  _ Lancelot _ . He felt a flutter and looked at his hand. The letter he had written was gone. Hoping it would end up where he thought it would, he went to bed. Tomorrow he would pack a few things and say goodbye to the few who actually didn’t treat him like he was the devil. 

As Lancelot and Percival rounded the corridor there was a strange sort of popping sound. When Lancelot opened his door he saw a piece of paper on his pillow. Percival followed to see what had caused the noise, shutting the door behind him. When Lancelot opened the paper he saw his friends’ familiar writing, and smiled. 

“It looks as though we are heading out to Ealdor tomorrow to retrieve our missing piece.” He hands the note over to Percival.

“How do you think he managed this?” 

“With Merlin, I’ve learned to trust and not think too much in to it. I don’t understand most of what that boy is capable of”. 

“Should we tell Arthur, or make something up and bring Merlin back as a surprise?”

“Let’s make it a surprise, shall we? We’ll get Gwaine and say we are going to head out on a patrol. He won’t suspect anything. Best not to tell Gwaine the actual purpose until we get out of the citadel. Don’t need him getting worked up and putting Arthur on alert.” Lancelot noted. At this Percival handed back the note and headed out to his room to prepare for the journey. 

*********

Gwaine, Lancelot, and Percival had travelled most of the day and stopped for the night only a few hours from Ealdor. Lancelot had been able to convince Arthur easily enough to let them go on a patrol for a few days. Convincing Gwaine had not been as easy. 

“Gwaine, you know we aren’t actually out here to patrol, right?” Lancelot starts as he sets his bedroll down. 

“What do you mean?” 

“I mean, we received a letter from Merlin. We are fetching him, so to speak. Escorting him back to Camelot.” Lancelot said watching for a reaction.

“Why didn’t you say?! I would have come along much faster had I known it was for Merlin!” Gwaine nearly shouted. 

“We didn’t tell you because we wanted it to be a surprise. Arthur has been down and we all know Merlin tends to cheer him up. When we got the letter we didn’t have a whole lot of time to plan. He said he was ready to come back. And if we didn’t leave when we did, he would have come back on his own. We didn’t want to chance he’d run into trouble along the way.” Percival added. 

“He sent you a letter? Why not me? Why not Arthur?” Gwaine was asking. “You two know something about him that you aren’t telling the rest of us. I don’t suppose you care to share?” He said biting into an apple. 

“It’s not really our place to tell. If he wants you to know, then he needs to be the one to tell you.” Lancelot says calmly. 

“Hmm. I suppose you’re talking about his magic then.” Gwaine said with a sly smile. 

“What!? You knew?” Percival asks, surprised.

“Course I knew. He’s not exactly stealthy. I honestly don’t know how Arthur doesn’t know. Then again, maybe he does and just doesn’t want to say anything about it.” Gwaine says simply.

“You should tell Merlin that you know. If Percival or I can’t be around, it would be good if he knew he could confide in you. He likes to try to hide his pain from us, but he needs to know we are here for him.”

“I can do that.” Gwaine says tossing his apple core and laying down on his bed roll.

“How long have you known, anyway?” Percival asks.

“Ah, well, you know that story Merlin told about running from a tavern and jumping off to follow Arthur? Well we were headed to the Perilous lands because Merlin said the Princess was in trouble. There was this bridge and while I was tying up the horses I heard the man say ‘finally! Magic has arrived!’ Since Merlin was the only one there, there was only one person he could be talking to. When I got there he called me Strength. Merlin seemed anxious like he thought I heard so I just pretended I hadn’t. Figured he’d tell me when he was ready. What about you? How long have you known?”

“Since he defeated a griffon. Arthur thought, still thinks, actually, that I killed it. But it was a magical creature and could only be killed by magical means. Merlin had said a spell that set my lance burning and it killed the griffon. Arthur had been knocked out but came too when the griffon died, seeing me standing over it. He tried to get me to stay in Camelot, but I couldn’t take credit for something I did not do. Besides, in leaving I became a better fighter and even met up with Percival.”

“Percival? What about you?” Gwaine asks.

“Well. I had my suspicions. But I wasn’t sure until after we had found Merlin in the woods when he was knocked out. That energy, that panic that washed over us all, I was certain it came from Merlin. I knew of some rumors, prophecies from my time with the Druids, and from what I had seen of Camelot, I knew they were about Merlin and Arthur. Not to mention seeing his wounds heal in front of my eyes leaving nothing but healed scars behind.”

“What? He healed? Why did he leave then?” Gwaine asked confused.

“There was no way to explain to Arthur how he had been whipped at least ten times, slashed in the face, and branded, but there was no longer any trace of fresh wounds on his body. Just more scars. The only conclusion would be magic. We couldn’t risk Merlin being discovered. So we sent him home. But, Arthur needs him. It’s time for him to come back to Camelot.” Lancelot finished.

“Well then. Let’s make sure he gets back safely so he can protect the King better. Goodnight fellas.” Gwaine said, laying his head down and almost instantly falling asleep. 

The knights were up early the next day determined to make it to Ealdor sooner rather than later. When they got to the village they dismounted and walked down the road, Lancelot, Percival, then Gwaine, stopping in front of a small house after tying up the horses. Lancelot went to knock when the door was suddenly opened. 

“Oh, hello Lancelot! How are you?” Hunith asks. 

“I’m well. We’re here to escort Merlin back to Camelot. Is he in?” 

“You just missed him. He wanted to go for a walk in the trees, just there before heading out. If you want you can follow. He always loses track of time when he’s in nature.” The men turned around and headed for the trees that she had pointed out. As they neared the grove they could feel a warm energy coming from ahead. They looked at each other, knowing they all felt it, and kept moving towards what felt like the center would be. When they got there, they saw Merlin sitting on a log, eyes closed, with a sort of gold shimmer surrounding him. He was grinning. 

“Are you lot just going to stand there, or are you going to say hello?” the boy said turning around and opening his eyes. For a second, they were gold and the energy around them dissipated. Then he had his normal cheeky grin and bright blue eyes.

“Merlin, my friend! You look great!” Gwaine said walking over and pulling him into a hug.

“It’s good to see you. Though, I didn’t know you would be joining.” Merlin said hesitantly. 

“They didn’t tell me anything I didn’t already know, mate. I’m glad to see you’re doing well. Are you ready to go?” Gwaine said nonchalantly, keeping an arm around the younger man. Merlin just looked between his friends. Lancelot nodded. They had started walking back. 

“And you’re not mad?” Merlin asked softly.

“Course not. I’ve known for a while, but was hoping you would tell me yourself. Circumstances just never came together though. Now that you know that I know, I’m here for you just as much as these two. Don’t forget that. You’re my best friend. I won’t jeopardize that.” He finished. 

“Thanks Gwaine.” Merlin blushed slightly. “Alright, let’s get going. I’ll grab my pack and we can be off. Think we’ll get there tonight or do you want to make camp and get back tomorrow sometime?” He asked.

“If we ride all day, we could probably get back tonight, but it will be extremely late.” Lancelot stated.

“That should be fine. I’d like to see the look on Arthur's face when I wake him up in the morning anyway. He hasn’t been too much of a dollop-head, has he?” Merlin grinned. 

“Well, we learned that none of his most trusted knights, aside from Leon, would be knights if it weren’t for you.” Lancelot said.

“What do you mean?” Merlin looks at each of his friends confused. “I’m sure you all would have been made knights without me.”

“Not the way Arthur tells it. Did you really try to hit him when you first met him?” Gwaine asked curiously.

“He was being a prat. And a bully. I don’t like bullies. He has changed since then. He’s not nearly as arrogant as he used to be.”

“Well, then. I’m sure glad you came to Camelot to sort him out. Lord knows where we’d be now if you hadn’t.” Gwaine chuckled. 

They had reached Merlin’s home now and he went inside to grab his pack. He hugged his mother goodbye, who then told the knights they were responsible for keeping her boy safe. Merlin just rolled his eyes, but was secretly pleased his mother was so concerned. They rode off for Camelot taking breaks every few hours to let the horses rest and eat a bit. When they reached Camelot it was just before midnight. They led the horses back to the stable and went their separate ways. Merlin went in to the physicians chambers as quietly as he could so as to not wake Gaius. When he lay down in bed he was asleep in moments grinning like a fool, knowing he was home. 


	5. A Funny Feeling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Heading to the Isle of the Blessed to try to stop the Dorocha.

When morning came, Merlin came out of his room to a startled Gaius who hadn’t known he was going to be back. They hugged and had breakfast together. Then he was off to the kitchens to get a proper breakfast for Arthur. He found himself checking and re-checking his neckerchief to make sure it covered the brand he received. When he got there, most of the servants were giving him hugs or handshakes, glad that he was back. Even the cook broke her normal scowl to grin at him. When he got to Arthur’s chambers, he opened the door, set the breakfast up on the table and went to open the curtains. As he did, he heard the muffled voice of his King.

“Rise and shine!” He said, and as soon as he said it the King shot up out of bed looking at him in disbelief. “Good morning Arthur, breakfast is at the table, you have training this morning with the Knights for a bit then on to council meetings.” He paused in confusion as Arthur had come to stand very close to him. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

“You’re back.” He said a bit breathy.

“Yes, I am. Would you like to get dressed before breakfast or after?” As he finished, he found himself wrapped in a hug. He wasn’t sure what to do at first, but eventually hugged his friend back. After a minute Arthur backed up and Merlin felt a hand smack him on the back of the head.

“Ow! What was that for?!” Merlin exclaimed, rubbing his head.

“That was for being away for so long. I trust you rested enough. I’m going to eat, while you put my clothes out for the day and start making the bed and picking up my laundry.” Arthur said turning away to go to the table, feeling like a huge weight had been lifted off his shoulders. Merlin wasn’t sure what to make of this interaction, so he put it down to a one off. Once Arthur ate and dressed, they headed down to the training grounds together. What Merlin had not expected was to be tackled by most of the knights. All of them were apparently glad to see him back and feeling better. Once everyone had got off him, he made his way over to the side to watch as he usually did. It felt good to be missed and know that all these people were glad he was back. While he was watching training he noticed a nobleman that he didn’t recognize coming over. When he got to the training grounds he caught Arthur’s attention. Merlin could swear that he heard Arthur call him ‘uncle’. Strange. He didn’t think Uther had any family, but this man didn’t look anything like Arthur’s mother. But that was the only connection he could think of. There was something about him that Merlin didn’t like. Just then the man looked up and spotted Merlin watching them. He bowed to Arthur and went back towards the castle, while Arthur walked over to him. 

“Seems the council meeting is happening earlier than I thought. You ready?” 

Merlin just looked at him. “Am I ready? I don’t do anything in the council meetings. I just stand to the back blending in with walls and such. Are you ready? You seem a bit tense after talking with that man.” Merlin added hoping Arthur would explain.

“Ah, that’s right. You were gone when Aggravaine arrived. That was my Uncle, on my mother’s side. He has been advising me when needed. He’s been very helpful.” Arthur finished as they walked toward the castle. Great. If Arthur trusted him this much it could only mean one thing. He would eventually betray him. Merlin made a note to keep an eye on him, just in case. 

They made their way through the castle to drop Arthur’s armor off at his chambers and grab the council papers before heading to the meeting. Once Arthur took his seat, Merlin took his spot to Arthur’s right slightly back. Throughout the meeting he caught Arthur glancing back to him, almost as if he were checking to make sure he were really there. Merlin wasn’t the only one to notice this. Aggravaine had picked up on Arthur’s focus shifting to him every so often. Merlin did what he could to pay attention to the topics of discussion, but kept feeling eyes on him. He glanced up and found Aggravaine looking at him. Like he was trying to study him. That was odd. Once they were done for the day, Merlin had gotten Arthur to bed and taken his armor and sword to polish back to his room. He’d forgotten how tiring keeping Arthur going could be. He settled into a restless sleep that night. He couldn’t help but feel in the pit of his stomach that something was about to happen. Arthur would call it one of his funny feelings. He knew it had to do with the illness he had experienced the week before his birthday. He just hoped he was wrong.

*********

After a few days, the Knights noticed a marked change in Arthur’s demeanor. He wasn’t so sullen all the time. He came to training more often and seemed overall more relaxed. He was happy again. They often attempted to drag Merlin out to the tavern, but he refused as politely as he could. After noticing their King’s improved behavior over a week, the Knights had started to notice Merlin frowning or dropping his smile almost as soon as he thought no one was watching. He acted happy to be back, and dove right in to all his normal tasks, but he was hiding something. A couple of days before the Samhain feast, Lancelot cornered Merlin and wouldn’t let him go until he told him what was bothering him. 

“Merlin, glad I found you. Come on, we’re going out.” Lancelot said as he walked into the physician’s chambers. 

“I’d rather not, Lance. But thanks.” He tried to politely decline. 

“It wasn’t a question, Merls. Let’s go.”

“You’re rather pushy today.” Merlin said obligingly as they walked out the door. “So where are we going?” 

“You are coming to the Knights quarters. Gwaine has a drinking game going on with Leon and YOU will be participating! Something has been bothering you, don’t deny it, just come have a couple drinks with us, relax, and then, if you want, you can tell me what it is.”

“Did Leon try making a bet again? He should know by now it’s not a good idea to make bets with Gwaine” Merlin chuckled. Lancelot didn’t miss that he hadn’t acknowledged the rest of what he had said. He knew Merlin would talk when he was ready. When they walked in the room, everyone cheered seeing who it was. Gwaine came over and nearly picked Merlin up with the hug he gave him. This caused even more laughter. It wasn’t long before Merlin had a cup in his hand and was sitting between Percival and Elyan. It was good to see his brother smiling and joyful. After a few hours, and several drinks, the knights headed their separate ways leaving Lancelot and Gwaine with Merlin. They sat in companionable silence for a bit. 

“I’m sorry that I have not been around much, or been a better friend these past days.” Merlin said almost slurring. 

“It’s alright Merls. You’re here now. And we’re always here for you. You know that.” Lance said.

“Yeah what Lance said” Gwaine leaned over and patted Merlin’s knee. 

“I, uh, I have somewhere I need to go. But I don’t know how to tell Arthur that I might be gone for a few days. He’s been so happy lately and I don’t want to be the cause of him being upset.”

“What do you know?” Lance asked seriously.

“It’s not a  _ know _ exactly. You remember just before my birthday, when I had been sick?” 

The Knights nod. 

“Well, it wasn’t exactly a normal kind of sick. I was woken out of a dead sleep by a voice. It said  _ Emrys, they are coming, you must be ready _ .” It had taken some time, but he had eventually remembered what had happened. Merlin took another drink. The silence seemed to drag on. 

“Ok, two questions, one, who is Emrys? And two, why do you think it’s now?” Gwaine asked, looking concernedly at his friend. 

“Emrys, is, erm, it’s what the Druids call me. But that bit isn’t really important right now. Something is coming. Something dark. I can feel it. I can’t really explain it other than that. I know that I need to go towards the White Mountains, but I don’t know what awaits me.” Merlin finished and looked up at his friends. 

“I’m with you. I’ll speak with Arthur tomorrow and ask that you accompany me and Gwaine on a patrol. Would that be enough or should we have anyone else along?” Lancelot asks.

“Maybe Percy? I don’t want too many people to come because I won’t be able to explain why or what I’m doing.” Merlin says and finishes his drink putting his cup back on the table.

“I’ll go let Percy know and meet you all tomorrow. Let’s not leave at dawn though, yeah? Maybe mid-morning?” Gwaine says. At this, he goes to deliver the news leaving Lancelot and Merlin alone. 

“Let’s get you back to your room before you can’t walk anymore.” Lancelot says snickering at the look on his brother’s face. Merlin laughs at this. 

“Alright. I’ll have Gaius make a couple hangover remedies for the morning. I think we might need it. Or at least I will.” Merlin smiles as Lancelot puts his arm around him leading him through the corridors to his chambers. 

Arthur had woken in the night for some reason. He didn’t know why, but now he couldn’t get back to sleep. He decided to go for a walk through the corridors and head up to the battlements. As he was walking, though, he found himself nearing the physician’s chambers, not really sure how he ended up on this side of the castle. He had heard someone else coming so he ducked in an alcove. What he saw was Lancelot nearly carrying his drunken manservant through the hall both of them laughing hysterically at something. He couldn’t help but smile. He hadn’t seen Merlin this happy in many days. After several moments, Lancelot had come back after putting Merlin to bed. Arthur stepped out of his alcove surprising Lancelot. 

“Sire, I didn’t see you there.”

“No worries Lancelot. I couldn’t sleep so I took a walk. Found myself down here for some reason.”

“I understand.”

“So what has you and Merlin up so late?” Arthur asks, trying for innocence.

“Nothing specific. Just a friendly competition of drinks.” Lancelot answers as they start walking back down the corridor together. “Sire, I wanted to speak with you, I was going to wait until tomorrow, but as you are here I see no time like the present.”

“Shoot Lancelot. You know I have no secrets.”

“I’d like to head a patrol out tomorrow, with Gwaine and Percival and Merlin. I’ve heard word of some activity near the White Mountains and I think a small party to investigate would be best.”

Arthur pauses. “Why Merlin?”

“Sire? If any of us were to become injured he would be invaluable. He has learned much from Gaius and it would be like having our own physician with us.”

Arthur couldn’t deny that made sense. But he knew there was more to it. Something Lancelot wasn’t saying. “Lancelot, you trust me, right?”

“Of course, Sire.” 

“I know there’s something you and a few of the others are keeping from me. I’m not mad. I know you wouldn’t unless you thought it was important. Just tell me this. It’s important? This secret?”

Lancelot stared at his King. “Yes. It is a secret that I will guard with my life. The secret entrusted to me affects more than I can imagine. And I will never betray the trust I hold.”

Arthur nods. “Tell me this one last thing. Does this secret involve magic?”

Lancelot just stares. Arthur nods as if that answered his question, then continues walking down the corridor. 

“Sire. You must know that I would lay down my life for you. I would never do anything to betray you, either.”

“I know. Have a good night Lancelot. See me before you depart tomorrow.” The King says this over his shoulder as he rounds a corner. There it is again. Magic. He wishes he had someone he could confide in about his doubts about the evilness of magic. Lancelot would never betray him, he knew that. But he had a secret about magic. One that he is willing to die to protect. Surely, if Lancelot is involved, it can’t be evil? When he got back to his chambers he went to his desk and sat down intending to do some paperwork since he was awake. But instead he ended up staring out the window watching the night fade into dawn consumed with his thoughts. He hadn’t even known Merlin was in the room until he felt a hand on his arm. 

“Sire? Have you not slept?” Merlin asked with concern in his voice.

“Hmm? No, I slept. But woke late into the night and went for a walk only to see a drunken Merlin being practically carried to his chambers.” He said looking up at his friend, smirking. He saw the blush creep up Merlin’s face. 

“Ah. That. Yes, well Lancelot thought I needed cheering up so he took me to the Knights’ hall and we somehow ended up in a drinking contest with Gwaine and Leon. Leon lost, obviously, but I don’t think that I won by any means.” He said with a chuckle. “Anyway, your breakfast is at the table, you should come eat. You’ll need your strength. Lots of meetings and training and such today.” As Merlin was talking he opened the curtains the rest of the way, picked up clothes off the floor, and started making the bed. 

“Merlin”

“Yes, Sire?”

“Can I ask you something and you’ll give me an honest answer?” Arthur asks as he walks over to the table for breakfast.

“I always give you an honest answer, dollop-head. Why would I change now?” He grins at Arthur but when he sees the serious look on his face he drops it. “Arthur?”

“What do you think of magic? I was raised that it’s evil and only corrupts. But. I can’t help but wonder. What if my father was wrong?” He paused and just stared at the table. 

“Where’s this coming from, Arthur?” Merlin asked tilting his head slightly, curiosity coming through. 

“Some of the knights are keeping something from me. I know it isn’t bad, they would never risk my life. But I know that this secret they are keeping involves magic. I don’t know how exactly, but it does. I know I’ve only been King for a short time, and there is much that I have to learn, but, maybe, just maybe, not all magic is bad.” When Arthur looked up he couldn’t figure out the expression on Merlin’s face. He had stiffened when he mentioned his knights keeping a secret about magic. Maybe Merlin knew the secret too? “Merlin?”

“Total honesty, Sire?”

“Yes, Merlin. Please. Tell me.”

“I don’t think magic is inherently good or bad. I think it just… is. Think of it like a sword. A sword is neither good nor bad. It is just a sword. The only harm it can cause is at the hand of the wielder. If the person means to harm, then it will do harm. If the person is using it to protect themselves from harm, then it is but a means of protection, a tool. Look at the Druids. Many of them have magic and practice the Old Religion, but they have always been a peaceful people. They healed Leon and sent him back to us. If all magic was truly evil, would they have done that?” Merlin paused. “That is just my opinion, Sire. And my opinion isn’t what matters. Trust in yourself, Arthur. You will be a great King, if you just trust in yourself and your judgement as I do.” Arthur stared at him. 

“Thank you, Merlin. Thank you for your honesty.” Arthur paused and picked up a piece of bread and started nibbling. “You better go get packed and get ready. Lancelot has requested you to accompany him on a patrol. I expect you to be back before the week is out though.” At that Merlin nodded and left. 

Lancelot knocked on the King's chambers and hearing an “Enter” he opened the doors and closed them behind him. 

“Everything is ready, Sire. You wished to see me before we departed?” 

“Yes, Lancelot. I know I don’t really have to say this, but I’m going to anyway. Merlin is to be kept safe and returned uninjured. Is that clear?”

“Of course, Sire. That goes without saying. He has had a few lessons with the sword now so that should help. We will protect him as if we were protecting you.” Lancelot could see the worry and anxiety warring in his King's face. He put a hand on his shoulder. “Sire, we will not let any harm come to him. I swear to you.” Some of the worry lifted but not by much.

“Thank you. Don’t. Don’t let him know that I asked this of you. I’ll never hear the end of it from him.”

Lancelot grinned. “It’ll be our little secret.” At that Arthur nodded and Lancelot went to join the others who were already on their horses ready to head out.

“What took you so long?” Gwaine asked. 

“The King wanted to speak to me before we left. But, I’m here now, so let’s not delay.” At that they headed out of the citadel. None of them looked back to see that the King was standing in his window watching them ride off. 

The day after the small party departed Camelot, another group was returning from their patrol. They had encountered Morgana travelling to the Isle of the Blessed and lost two knights. After Sirs Elyan and Leon had reported to Arthur, they returned to the knights chambers to prepare for the feast of Samhain. Arthur couldn’t help but feel as if there was some kind of connection between Morgana’s attack of his patrol and Merlin’s departure. Merlin would often talk to him about having a bad feeling about something. Arthur called them Merlin’s funny feelings. He often disregarded them. Though looking back, all those times Arthur had either been injured or ended up unconscious only to have to rely on Merlin’s version of events. Strange. 

*********

Merlin’s group made it to the foothills of the White Mountains after a few days and decided to stay in an inn that night instead of setting up a camp. They got a room, put their belongings away and went to the hall to have their evening meal and a drink or two in honor of Samhain, as the locals were also doing. Merlin could feel his stomach rolling and it took a massive effort on his part to eat even just a few bites, let alone keep, any food down. The others kept their eyes on him, noticing his condition seemed to worsen as the night went on. 

Morgana and Morgause had made it to the Isle of the Blessed and as midnight approached their plan was put into action. Morgana chanted her spell and drove her dagger into Morgause’s heart. A blast knocked Morgana off her feet where she lay unmoving for a time. 

Right as midnight struck in the Inn, the people had lifted their drinks in toast. At that moment, an intense and overwhelming cold seeped through Merlin to his bones. There in the middle of the room stood a woman shrouded in darkness and looking directly at him.  _ Emrys. Emrys. Emrys.  _ As she said this, he felt his mug leave his hand and hit the floor. Before he could do anything, he too, lost consciousness and that was all he knew. 

Morgana had awoken on the Isle to find herself face to face with a strange presence. The Caileach is what she called herself. She spoke with a knowledge that Morgana could only hope to one day achieve. “In tearing the veil you have created a new world. And you will not walk through it alone. The one they call Emrys will walk in your shadow. He is your Destiny. And he is your Doom.”

Percival had barely caught Merlin before he fell. His skin was freezing. The three Knights rushed to their room and placed him on the bed piling as many blankets on him as they could. 

“What happened?” Gwaine asked.

“I don’t know.” Percival answered. 

“I’ve never felt anyone so cold” Lancelot added. They stoked a fire in the and tried to keep Merlin as close to it as possible. He hadn’t realized they must have dozed off as there was another person in the room standing over Merlin. He went to draw his sword, but was stopped when he saw it was a Druid. 

“What are you doing?” Gwaine asked, coming over to the figure after Lancelot stood up.

“I’m doing my part to help heal him. Giving him information that will help him in the coming days. If he is to succeed, he is going to need your strength. He has a great destiny. And he must fulfill it.” The Druid replied. Very cryptic. 

“Will he wake?” Lancelot asked nervously.

“He will be fine in a few hours. When large amounts of dark magic are released, they affect him more than anyone. His magic is so pure, and good, that he feels everything with an intensity I could not even fathom. When he wakes, he will not know I was here. He must succeed. You, his companions, must ensure it.” At that the Druid said a spell over Merlin’s sleeping form. Merlin seemed to relax slightly. Then the Druid left, leaving the men to wonder what just happened. After a few hours Merlin began to stir.

“Merlin?” Gwaine asked tentatively.

“Gwaine. We’re too late.” He whispered. 

“Hold on let me wake the others, they’re going to want to hear this too.” Gwaine woke Percival and Lancelot and they crowded around Merlin, waiting. 

“What happened Merlin?” Lancelot asked.

“We’re too late. Morgana has made a move to bring the people to their knees. She means to cause despair and panic. And she will succeed.” He said softly teeth chattering slightly. The three waited for him to continue. “She has created a tear between the worlds. Spirits have already started to cross over. The Dorocha.” As Merlin said this he closed his eyes putting a hand to his head as if staving off a headache. 

“How is that possible?” Gwaine asked.

“With a blood sacrifice. Dark magic. The magic of a High Priestess. We knew Morgause was injured, but it was more than that. She was dying. Morgana sacrificed her to tear open the veil.” Merlin finished and attempted to sit up, but was promptly pushed back down and covered back up. 

“Can it be repaired?” Percival asks.

“Yes. But I’m not sure how it will work. A blood sacrifice was made to open it, it may require another to close it.” Merlin said softly.

“Get some rest Merls. We’ll keep an eye on you and head out first thing to see if we can figure something out.” Gwaine said with finality and watched as his eyes drifted close already falling asleep. 

“We need to warn Arthur.” Lancelot said. 

“We will. First thing tomorrow we’ll send word. Hopefully that won’t be too late.” Gwaine answered. “If what Merlin said is true, then we all need to get some rest. The next few days will not be easy.”

When they got up the next morning, Merlin had an idea and wanted to see if it would work. He wrote a note to Gaius about the veil and told him to warn Arthur of the dangers. He then set it in his hand like he had for Lancelot and thought about Gaius, and the letter was gone. 

“That’d be a neat trick to know.” Gwaine said watching him curiously. 

“I’m not sure I could teach that one. I don’t really know how it works.” Merlin shrugged grabbing his pack as they headed out to ready their horses. 

“I suppose we are going to head straight for this tear, aren’t we?” Lancelot asked, looking at the others. 

“You don’t have to come.” Merlin said quietly. “But I have to go. I think I can close it, but I’m not sure. I have to try.”

“Where you go, we go.” Said Percival. At that they head off following Merlin’s lead. Not sure what to expect. 

In Camelot, Gaius was restocking his medicine satchel when a parchment landed on the table with a soft sort of popping sound. Knowing this can only be from one person, he grabbed the letter and read. As soon as he had, he wished he hadn’t. Not that that would undo what had happened, but it would definitely make him less uneasy. He folded the note, grabbed his medicine, and headed to speak with the King before the day's meetings began. Unfortunately the King had already been called to the audience chamber as a girl came seeking shelter from something that had attacked her village. When Gaius got there he stood in the back while she told her story. His fear was realized when she completed her tale. When she was ushered from the room, the King approached him and asked if he had any ideas. Thanks to Merlin, he knew exactly what had happened. He explained as much to the King, leaving out how he discovered this information, who then gathered some of his knights to ride out and investigate. He hoped that Merlin could find a way to fix the tear without doing something crazy, like sacrificing himself. He couldn’t bear the thought of losing him. 

*********

Merlin had been prepared for spirits, what he hadn’t been prepared for was the cold. That, and the screaming. The group had managed to make it further along the path to the Isle of the blessed but they were still a good day hard journey from their goal. They were all tired. Taking shifts to keep the fires going and trying to get some rest was taking its toll. It was night, and they had found some ruins to take shelter in. Merlin and Gwaine had gathered what firewood they could hoping it would last the night. 

“I’m sorry I couldn’t tell you sooner,” Merlin started.

“Not your fault Merls. We’re on our way now. Do you know what you plan to do when we get there?” Lancelot asks. 

“Erm. Well. I have an idea, but it’s something I’d like to test out first. Would you all be ok to keep watch? It’s just I’m not sure I’m going to be very… responsive, once I start.”

“We’ll keep watch. If I don’t like what I see, though. I will do what I can to pull you back. Understand?” Lancelot says looking directly in my eyes. 

He nodded. “Right. Well, here goes nothing I guess.” At that he sat in front of the fire and stared deep in the flames. Closing his eyes while concentrating on the warmth of the fire. Imagining it spreading over his body. His senses felt hyper focused. He could feel the hair on his arms rise in response to the warmth, hear the crackle of the flames as if he was amongst them. At that same moment, he felt his magic respond. He pushed it out almost like pushing out a bubble. Forcing it to envelope first himself and then fire, then the others. He heard the gasps from his companions. He could sense their awe. When he opened his eyes he could see that he’d made a sort of force-field around them. He closed his eyes again and reached out with his senses to see how far he could reach. He felt the forest, a few animals nearby, but no people. He let his magic wander a bit more and then gasped. Arthur. What is he doing out here? And he’s only a few hours away! He can’t be out here! He is supposed to be at the castle, ruling Camelot. He could sense Arthur had some Knights with him to include Sirs Elyan and Leon. He tried to keep his breathing even, but he could feel the panic coming up. He couldn’t get enough air. Before he knew it he was out of breath, head down in his hands. His magic had started to react to the episode. It pulsed out like a warning. Hands were on his shoulders trying to tell him something but he couldn’t make out what it was. 

“Come on, Merlin, breathe!” Lancelot was saying. Breathe? He opened his eyes to see Lancelot was looking at him with concern and noticed a whirlwind had picked up outside of the warm field he had established. Why had he said to breathe? Oh! He quickly took a few deep breaths and released them he hadn’t realized he had stopped breathing for a minute there. After a few deep breaths, he was feeling a little more relaxed and as he breathed out he released a last surge of magic that was just warmth. Hoping it made it to Arthur. 

“Sorry” he muttered as he looked up at Lancelot and the equally concerned faces of Gwaine and Percival. 

“What happened?” Percival asks.

“Well, I wanted to test something. Part of it worked, though I’m not sure if I’m sustaining it, or what exactly, but I wanted to create the feeling of the fire all around. Thus the bubble we are now sitting in. But I also wanted to check and see how far I could reach with my magic. So I sent it wandering, so to speak. There was nothing nearby. But, there was something less than half a day behind us.” He said, trying to keep it together. “Arthur.”

“What’s the princess doing?” Gwaine asked, trying to keep the tone light. 

“It appears, he’s heading the same way we are. To the Isle of the Blessed. I think it’s safe to say that Gaius got my note and told Arthur the pertinent information, who then decided to ride out and face this new threat since I’m not there to talk him out of it.” Merlin said, barely daring to take a breath. “When I felt how close he was, I might have… panicked. Slightly.”

“Slightly? You think so? I’ve never seen anything like it. It’s like we were in the center of a whirlwind. It was kind of incredible.” Gwaine said. 

“Though, potentially, highly destructive” Percival added concernedly. 

“Yeah, sorry, I’ve had these episodes for a long time now but since my magic started acting up they sort of take on a life of their own.”

“Anyway we can figure out how we can help ease them? Other than Lancelot keeping a hold of you that is?” Gwaine asks.

“I’m not sure. I can't explain how Lance seems to be able to calm me. Maybe it has something to do with you being there when this all started? Maybe my magic just recognizes you? I don’t know. If you want, Gwaine, Perc, after this is over, we can try to get it so you can help as well. It would probably be better if all of you were able to reach me when that happens. That way Lance isn’t stuck with me all the time.” Merlin chuckles lightly.

“That’s not a bad idea. So let’s get this over with and start heading back and we can work on keeping you under wraps as the princess’s secret protector.” Gwaine says. “Do you think this bubble thing will last all night?”

“I think so. But maybe keep someone up for a while to make sure that when I go to sleep it stays up.” 

“Then go to sleep. We’ll wake you when it’s time to move on. Maybe we can make it there before tomorrow night. But we’ll need you rested.” Lance says as he more or less forces me to lay down on my bedroll. 

“Ok. But wake me if anything comes up.”

“Of course.” Percival says. I see them all glance at each other and walk to the other side of the fire before I can’t keep my eyes open anymore. 

Arthur had been on watch when he felt it. A strange, yet familiar, energy that passed over him. It helped ease his mind, as it felt like he had Merlin right next to him comforting him. Not that he would admit that he needed the boy to comfort him. Or, at least, not out loud. This whole trip, he had a plan. He was actually glad that Merlin wasn’t here because he knew that he was the only one who could talk him out of his plan. He knew it was a crazy plan. But after what Gaius had said about the rift, he saw it as his only chance. His best hope of saving the people of Camelot.  _ His _ people. Feeling that comfort right then, feeling like Merlin was with him, well it only strengthened his resolve. If he had told any of his Knights what his true intentions were, they would offer to sacrifice themselves in an instant to protect their King. But he could not ask it of them. His thoughts were still going when he realized the sky had started lightening. Strange. There hadn’t been any Dorocha this night. It was a relief from the many nights of terror that had occurred. Better wake the others so they could be on their way.

*********

“Merlin” Percival was attempting to shake him awake. The warlock started to stir, and when his eyes opened, they were golden. “How do you feel?” he asked a little hesitantly.

“Really great.” He answered with a smile, sitting up. He looked over and Lance had put breakfast together, but they all stopped and watched him for a bit when he got up. A little confused, he asked, “Is something wrong? You’re all looking at me very strangely.” 

“Merls. Uh, well, first things first, the shield or whatever it was, stayed up all night, and we had no issues with the Dorocha. So, cheers to that!” Gwaine said, not quite meeting his eyes. 

“That’s fantastic!” he said excitedly. Noticing the others not as excited as him he asked, “Isn’t it?”

“It is. But, you should know, that your eyes are gold. It might be from all the magic you were using unconsciously. It could fade, but we should probably avoid towns and people for the rest of our journey. Or at the very least get you a cloak that covers your face.” Lancelot told him. Merlin just stood there looking at each of his friends, making eye contact with each of them. They weren’t frightened of him, just concerned. 

“Does anyone have an extra cloak then?” He asks, voice sounding a little harsh as if he hadn’t had any water in days. Lancelot could tell he was trying very hard to keep his panic under control. Gwaine pulled one out of his pack and brought it over. 

“Here ya go Merls. Picked it up at the Inn. Should work for now.” He pats Merlin on the shoulder handing him the cloak. Percival watched most of this, trying to keep his awe in control. There was so much raw power radiating from Merlin, even he could feel it. And he wasn’t magically inclined. He had decided to pack up their things while Merlin was putting the cloak on and adjusting it to hide as much of his face as he could. When he looked up at his friends, all that was seen were glowing gold orbs in the depth of the hood. As long as no one got too close to them, they wouldn’t notice anything. Considering where they were headed, he doubted they’d encounter anyone. Riding hard, they should reach their goal by the end of the day. They all mounted up, in a hurry to get the day over with. 


	6. What Happens on the Isle...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Closing the rift.

The Isle of the Blessed lay just ahead. A small boat awaited them. Merlin had started shaking, well, his hands had started shaking. He was doing what he could to keep them under control but the amount of magic coming from the rift was intense. The others were starting to feel uneasy as well. Merlin wasn’t just sending off waves of energy now. There were a few times that small tendrils of lightning seemed to come off him. He could feel his magic about to burst out. BUT. He needed to hold on until he got to the rift.  _ I’m not entirely in control right now. When we get there, try to stay back. I don’t know what’s going to happen. When Arthur gets here, try to keep him back. They are almost upon us. Whatever happens in there, do not worry about me. Protect Arthur.  _ It was all Merlin could do. He couldn’t speak for fear of his magic leaking out. The others nodded to each other and him, acknowledging they understood. When the boat finally stopped, they climbed out and moved towards the center of the Isle, following closely behind Merlin. When they arrived in the open of what was supposed to be a courtyard, they all stared at the sight before them. A massive void, the size of the tallest tower in Camelot was in the center, with a being standing sentry.  _ Stay here.  _ Merlin walked forward to meet the Caileach. He kept his hood low over his head. He could feel Arthur approaching where the boat would be. How had he caught up so quickly? Now was not the time to worry about that. He returned his focus to the being in front of him. They stood facing each other now directly in front of the rift. 

“So, Emrys, you mean to challenge me?” The Caileach says. 

“I mean to banish you back to the depths you came from” Merlin says, power seeping through his every word. He could feel the others bracing themselves on the walls when the power from his voice rolled over them. 

“Is that so? The rift was created by a blood sacrifice. And I do not intend to close it without the same.” She said, though now unsteady, her black eyes staring into Merlin’s gold. 

“It was dark magic that was used to bring the Dorocha forward. But the rift can be healed without another sacrifice.” His power was swelling, and he knew what he needed to do to close the rift. He saw the fear in the Caileach’s eyes as she felt the power roll over her. Thinking of his friends, all those he cared about, he could feel the warmth and love of his magic. He focused on the rift and began to chant words from the Old Religion. He didn’t even know what words he was saying. They just came out and the rift started to pull itself together. The void started to send out tendrils of cold and darkness towards him. He couldn’t defend himself because his energy was so focused on closing the rift. One jolt of ice shot through his chest. Before he lost consciousness he saw the rift fully healed. He could feel himself falling to the ground. Was someone yelling his name? He couldn’t feel anything anymore. 

*********

Arthur hadn’t known what to expect when he got to the Isle of the Blessed, but it definitely wasn’t this. Lancelot, Percival, and Gwaine stood at the entrance to the courtyard where the rift was. 

“What are you doing here?” It was all he could get out. 

“Sire, you need to stay back.” Lancelot said. Leon and Elyan and the others stayed as close as they could to the courtyard entrance. 

“Where is he?” Arthur yelled. Panic starting to come through. He sees that there are two figures near the rift, and one with a pure golden light that seemed to be closing the rift. 

“Sire, please, just be patient.” Lancelot said with certainty.

“It’s him isn’t it? Merlin is the one closing the tear?” Arthur says in shock as everything clicks in place. The warmth, it felt like him. 

“Please, Arthur, we will tell you everything, just not here. Not right now.” Lancelot says, trying to reassure him. Suddenly the golden light flares and the rift is closed. Before anyone could say anything else, Arthur had run across the courtyard to try to catch the slowly falling cloaked form. He got there just in time to save the familiar head from slamming to the ground. His skin is so pale now that it looks like he’s dead. But he can’t be dead. Arthur has so much still to say to him. He touches the boys’ face and his skin is like ice. Pulse. Check for a pulse! There! Barely, but it’s there. 

“Quickly! We need to get him out of here and get a fire going.” At that Percival comes forward and picks him up like he weighs nothing, keeping his head covered so the others don’t see who it is just yet. 

The boat ride back to the shore was tinged with anxiety. Once there, they all mount up and ride until it’s too dark to see. They found a stream and set up camp right next to it. Percival got Merlin off his horse, hood still covering his face, and set him next to the stream. When he did this, the strangest thing happened. Merlin’s hand reached out to the water. And it appeared as if the water was moving through him. Arthur rushed to his side to pull his hand back.

“Arthur. Arthur, there is no need to worry. Good Knights of Camelot, you can rest here safely. We wish you no harm.” The voice was strange and seemed to come from several drops of water with faces. 

“Please, we need to get him help.” Arthur pleads. 

“There is no need to worry. Already my sisters work to heal him. The young warlock has a destiny that has been written since the dawn of time. There is much that he does not understand about the power he wields. He will need your help, as you will need his in the days to come.”

“What?” it comes out as a whisper. Arthur looks over at Merlin, though his face is still covered, he can see the faint traces of blue-white lights tracing up his limbs. He looks back at the faces. “Who are you? What destiny are speaking of?”

“We are Vilia. The spirits of this stream. He is not fully aware of his destiny. You must speak with him to get some of the answers you seek. You will be safe here for the night. Now rest. For when you wake, he will be healed.” There was a warm glow radiating over the camp now. Arthur looks over to the others to see they are focused on the pale motionless form. Arthur goes to sit next to him and feels for a pulse. It’s getting stronger already. The King breathes a sigh of relief that he had no idea he had been holding in. He turns to the Knights and knows this is not going to be an easy conversation. 

“So. Who wants to start? Lancelot? Percival? Gwaine? I don’t really care who goes first, but start talking. Either with how you know what you know, or what it is you learned?” They look amongst each other, then nod at some unspoken agreement.

“I’ll start.” Lancelot says. “I’ve known since the griffon that he has magic. He’s the one who killed it. I only wielded the lance, but it was a magical creature and could only be killed with magic. I heard his spell. Since then I’ve done what I could to help him, protect him. He was the one who knew how to defeat Morgana’s immortal army. He’s always been the bravest man I’ve ever met. But, things changed after we started to pry into his life. Not knowing his birthday made me realize that he keeps much of himself closed off. The first week of your coronation celebrations, you remember he was sick? He’d had a nightmare and was woken from a dead sleep with a warning that something dark was coming. He was as cold as he is now, and a cold sweat had enveloped him. I had stopped a serving girl who was taking water to Gaius and I took it. I helped get him put in front of the fire to warm him some. He had let out a gasp and several jars shattered. His magic just sort of lashed out in response to something. He doesn’t remember it really, just the feeling of panic, so you won’t be able to ask him about it. He had many, many more bad nights after that, according to Gaius. The night before the final day of the tournament, which also happened to be his birthday, Gaius finally gave him a sleeping draught. I know he told you as much. I was up early that last day, call it nerves if you will, but I went to check on him again. It was the most incredible thing. I went into the physicians chambers and books were hanging in the air. Plants and herbs were growing and maturing. The fire was changing colors. And Merlin. He was over his bed, but not in it. There was this soft golden light coming off of him. He looked so peaceful. I’d never seen such a serene look on his face before. Right as the sun crested the horizon, everything in the air settled back down to its rightful place, including Merlin. A burst of golden energy came out of him. You all felt it, though you didn’t know what it was. When he opened his eyes, they were the most pure gold color I have ever seen. They stayed that way all day. Which is why Gaius wanted to keep him away from anyone. But, after the tournament, when the feast was getting ready to start, I went to check on him again. He knew I was there before I knocked on the door. He knew I had won, though he hadn’t seen any of the games. When I brought him to the feast, he was on edge because of his… transformation, if you will. He described it as a raw nerve feeling. He could feel everything and hear everything so clearly that it was overwhelming. I know you and Gwaine saw how I was able to calm him. When we all parted, I found him up on one of the western towers overlooking the citadel. The way he described what he felt… You need to have him tell you sometime. I can’t do it justice. Anyway, after I got him to bed, I cornered Gaius. I knew he knew something of what was going on. He told me of how he was born with his magic. According to the Druids, he is magic in physical form. Destined to help the Once and Future King unite the lands creating peace for all peoples. He is said to be the greatest sorcerer to ever walk the Earth. Percival can confirm the legends as he had heard them when he spent some time with the Druids. That night I told you I wanted to lead a patrol, I did have ulterior motives to getting Merlin drunk. He was hiding something and I needed him to open up. He told us about something bad that was coming that he needed to take care of. When Samhain came, we were at an Inn, and he collapsed as the clock struck midnight. When he came to, he told us of the Dorocha and sent word to Gaius to inform you what happened. A day back, he sat in front of a fire and said he wanted to try something. His magic surrounded us and kept the Dorocha away. But while he was sitting there, a whirlwind seemed to pick up all around us. We were in the eye. I’ve seen it happen before on a much smaller scale. He was panicking. He sensed you nearby. He knew you were not far behind us and he started to worry. I’m sure you know by now that the voice we had heard when escaping those slavers, it was him. He wasn’t able to access his magic for fear of collapsing the crumbling structure on top of us. He said his fear was keeping him from being able to reach his magic.” Lancelot finally took a moment to pause. “His magic is so powerful, I don’t know how he contains it. When we were approaching the Isle of the Blessed, he couldn’t speak. He spoke only through our thoughts. Power was radiating off of him as well as lightning. You saw most of what he was able to do. He warned us you were coming and to keep you back until he could close the rift. He cares more about our well-being than his own. If you all will help, I mean to change that.”

This was more than Arthur had anticipated. So much information. All he could do was look down at his friend in wonder. “He was born with magic? I didn’t think that was possible…”

“There has never been, and will never be, another like him.” Percival says. 

“I’ve been speaking with Merlin and Guinevere, and a few others recently, but, I’ve been thinking of changing the laws regarding the use of magic. It will all take a lot of time, but, I’ve been wondering if we didn’t have such harsh laws against those with magic, perhaps many magical attacks could have been prevented. The Druids have been nothing but peaceful. Morgana has sought to use her magic for her own gains, but, surely not all magic users are like that. Would you stand with me, if these laws were to change?” 

“Princess, you don’t need to ask. We are with you. Bringing magic back, you’re going to encounter obstacles. Just let us know what you need, and we are there.” Gwaine says. “Now, after that bedtime story, I’m exhausted. I’m gonna get some rest so hopefully we can wake up and thank our currently unsung hero for saving our lives.” At that, they all nodded and lay down to rest. Arthur stayed right next to Merlin. He was not about to let him be out of his sight like that again. It caused him too much anxiety. Finally knowing how incredible his friend was, he closed his eyes hoping for rest. 

*********

Just before dawn, Merlin had started to stir. This caused Arthur to wake up and watch his friend. As he stirred, he could see a soft light coming off of his friend. After Merlin had taken a deep breath in, and released it, he also released some of his magic. A warm, loving feeling washed over everything. Arthur just sat there. That was incredible. There was no other word for it. The others had started to wake and come over after the feeling had washed over them as well. 

“How is he?” Lancelot asked, coming to squat down next to Arthur. 

“I’m not sure. If that energy was any indicator, I’d say fine. He’s starting to wake up. We should get some breakfast going so he can have something to eat when he wakes up.” Lancelot nods and heads off to get the others started on gathering what they can for breakfast. Since Gwaine usually burns the food, he was in charge of getting the horses ready to head out once they are done. As breakfast is being dished out, porridge and some berries they found, Merlin sits up and comes over rubbing his eyes, not sure he believes what he’s seeing. 

“Is Arthur helping with breakfast? I must have died then. Or this is a really, really weird dream.” He says approaching the group. The others chuckle at the familiar antics from the raven-haired warlock. He isn’t meeting anyone’s eyes though, as he doesn’t know what his eyes are doing.  _ Someone needs to tell me what happened. Before I start panicking. _ Merlin directs his thoughts to Lancelot, Percival, and Gwaine who all look at each other a little guiltily. 

“Come here Merlin. Sit down and eat. You’ve been out cold since yesterday.” Arthur says handing him a bowl. Seeing how polite and nice Arthur is being causes Merlin’s anxiety to jump up. 

“Okay, who are you, and what have you done with King Arthur?” He said trying to keep the anxiety he feels out of his voice. A small wind had picked up and was starting to swirl around the group. Lancelot puts a hand on his shoulder. He hadn’t realized Lancelot was so close. 

“Deep breaths Merls. Remember, deep breaths.” Lancelot looks him in the eyes and tries to find a way to let him know that his eyes are still gold. Since Merlin is attuned to Lancelot he’s able to calm down after closing his eyes and taking some deep breaths. After the last one, his magic dispelled the unintentional wind. He kept his eyes on the food in front of him. 

“So, who wants to go first on how their trip has been so far?” Arthur asks feigning innocence. “Should I go first? Or would you lot like to tell your tale?”

“Since you had most of our story last night, I think it’s only fair for you to start, Princess” Gwaine says with a smirk. 

“Alright, well, the day after you had left we had a patrol return with a confirmed sighting of Morgana putting her in the vicinity of the Isle of the Blessed. After the feast for Samhain, a young lady came seeking an audience as her village had been decimated by some unseen force. After what she described, Gaius said it was the work of the Dorocha who had been released by Morgana. We made to ride out and vanquish them. Gaius had said a blood sacrifice had been made to open this rift, and it was presumed that another would be required to close it. A couple days back we were camped out, still at least a day’s ride from the Isle, but we experienced no attacks that night. Being well rested we were able to make haste to the Isle. What we had not expected to see when we got there, were you all. I knew you were running a patrol in the general area, but I had not expected to find you facing off with this being on your own. Any reason you couldn’t tell your King the real reason you were wanting to head a patrol this way?” Arthur looked at the companions before turning to look at Merlin whose hands were shaking holding his bowl. 

“It’s my fault. I had a bad feeling and I had no way of explaining it to you. I don’t know that I can explain it now, honestly. I expect you saw some of what happened, so I know you’re going to have questions. I will do my best to answer. When I told Lance about my  _ funny feeling _ as you call it, he said he’d take care of it. I didn’t want to bother you with it since I had only been back from Ealdor for a short time.” Merlin said eyes remaining fully focused on the bowl in his hands. 

“Merlin, can you do me a favor?” Arthur asked. 

“If it is in my power to do so, yes.” He responded. 

“Look at me.” 

Merlin tensed at this and tried to keep his breathing even. He felt the anxiety rise and knew he was going to have another episode. But he could not keep going like this. Hiding things from Arthur. Slowly, he looked up and met his King’s gaze. The wind had picked up again around them. Much faster this time. Similar to a few days ago, their group was now the center of a small whirlwind. Unlike before, he could feel his eyes shining. That was strange. He hadn’t felt his eyes shining before. 

“You don’t have to hide anything from me, Merlin. You’re my friend. The little brother I never wanted if you will. I know you don’t think you can trust me, and that you’ve conditioned yourself to hide this side of you. But I need you to know you have nothing to fear from me.” Arthur had said this with his hand resting on Merlin’s shoulder to ensure the words sunk in. When Arthur had finished speaking the wind had died down. Merlin had a huge smile on his face that reached his eyes. Arthur couldn’t help but notice the scar on Merlin’s face as he smiled, making his guilt come up. He smothered it down, because he hadn’t seen his friend this happy in a very long time. A small wave of joy washed out over the group causing everyone to smile. 

“Sorry about that. I’m still trying to get a handle on this. Since my birthday, my emotions and magic kind of go hand in hand and I can’t seem to control it all that much.” He chuckled. “It’s strange talking about it with you. I had had nightmares for so long of what would happen if you found out about it. About my magic. Being burned on a pyre, hanged, beheaded, even banished. I don’t think anything could have prepared me for your… acceptance. I don’t think I can tell you how much of a relief it is. Though I suppose my magic already told you for me.” 

“There is one problem though, currently.” Arthur said. 

“Yes?” Merlin asked hesitantly.

“Well, we can’t very well come back to Camelot with you and your glowing eyes. That’ll just give everything away. Do you know if they’ll go back to normal in the next few days while we journey back?” Arthur asked looking at Merlin like he was a puzzle that needed solving. 

“Erm, I’m not sure I can answer that. The last time this happened, it did eventually go away. But the amount of magic I’ve expended recently, I kind of don’t really have control right now. I can work on it on the way. Besides, I promised Gwaine and Percival that I’d work with them so they could calm me down the same way Lance does.” 

“Alright. Perhaps when we get back, you can add me to that list. The more people that can help you keep calm and not accidentally cause a whirlwind in the Great Hall during a feast, the better.” Arthur says almost teasingly. 

“Yes, Sire. I think I can handle that” he chuckles again. At that, they all got up, cleaned their dishes and headed on their way back towards Camelot.  _ Don’t think this means I’ve let you all off the hook of telling me what happened last night. I want to know what happened after Arthur got there and how we ended up here.  _ He pushed his thoughts to Lancelot, Percival and Gwaine. The three just looked at him and each other.  _ If you keep looking at me when I speak to you like this, the others are going to know something is up. I think Arthur knowing I can do this would be too much for him right now.  _ As that thought was coming across, he caught something from Gwaine. It wasn’t really words, but it was a feeling saying ‘you’d be surprised’. Which caused him to tilt his head in confusion. 

“If you lot are done staring into each other’s eyes, we’re planning to stop ahead for a quick break.” Elyan says, apparently having caught they were having some silent conversation. Even Arthur looked at them, causing Merlin to blush knowing they’d been caught. 

“Some other hidden talent you care to share with the rest of us,  _ Me _ rlin?” Arthur asked.

_ No Sire.  _ He thought and chuckled. Then he looked up and realized he’d said that to them all, in their minds. His eyes grew wide in a mix of shock and fear. “Er, no, Sire, not at the moment” his voice cracked betraying him. It was already too late they had all stopped and were watching him. Oh no. not now! Panic rose in him, quick and overwhelming. He couldn’t catch his breath. He jumped off his horse and ran a ways into the trees, not hearing the others calling after him. He couldn’t catch his breath. He fell to the ground on his hands and knees and tried to calm himself down. Arthur had looked so shocked and maybe he saw a little fear in his eyes too. He grabbed at his hair desperately trying to reign in his panic. He was in a tempest. It wasn’t just wind, there was the crackle of lightning this time. Clouds were gathering.  _ Stop. Stop! STOP! _ He yelled at himself. He felt like he was going to burst, he wanted to scream. Maybe that’s what he needed to do. With that thought he let out a yell. He knew his magic would react and burst out, but there was nothing he could do to get it under control right now. As he yelled, his voice seemed to carry and come out of him like a shockwave. Once he yelled, he felt a hand on his shoulder. He looked up to see his friend, and King looking at him with such concern, his panic faded. Arthur was kneeling in front of him trying to reassure him as much as he could with a look. He nodded and took a few deep breaths. After the fourth breath he let out, his magic surged out a sense of calm. Strange. How had Arthur been able to calm him down?

“I’m sorry.”

“What for?” He said looking at Merlin curiously. 

“I didn’t mean to panic like that. It just came over me so suddenly and I didn’t know how my magic would react. I didn’t want to hurt anyone.” It came out low and barely above a whisper. 

“You don’t need to apologize. But we definitely need to work on this before we get back. I don’t want you to wipe out Camelot by accident because you forgot to polish my armor or something.” He said teasingly. This caused him to laugh and he found he couldn’t stop. Arthur just grinned and got him back to his feet and headed back towards the others. Arthur was doing what he could so Merlin wouldn’t see the destruction he had caused with his episode. “I don’t suppose there’s a way for us to communicate back to you since we don’t have magic when you speak with us through our minds?”

“Not exactly. I mean, if my magic is accustomed to you then I can sort of pick up a response, in a sense. It’s hard to explain. Erm. When you caught me talking with Lance, Percy, and Gwaine I had told them to stop staring as they’d give us away that I didn’t want to scare you with this ability. I could swear I picked up from Gwaine a sort of response of,  _ you’d be surprised _ . I’m still not sure what he meant.” Merlin said, looking to Arthur for an answer.

“That’s a bit of a conversation that would be best had over a fire and dinner at the end of the day. I promise we will talk about it, but let’s wait until we stop for the day, yeah?”

“Alright. As long as you promise. I trust you, Arthur.” Merlin paused, a crooked smile forming. “Even if you are a clotpole.”

“Glad to see you’re better.” He chuckled as they got back to the others who were filling their water up and resting the horses. When they got back and the others heard their bantering they seemed to visibly relax. After a half hour they mounted up and continued on their journey. When they stopped for the night, they were about a day and a half from Camelot. They’d made good timing. When they made camp, Merlin went about setting out bedrolls, getting pots and pans out, setting up a fire, until Gwaine came over and pushed him down to sit on a log near the fire that he had just started. 

“Gwaine? Something up?” 

“Merls, just sit here and try and relax, yeah? I think we can manage dinner tonight while we go over a bit of what happened so the Princess has a full understanding.” He sat down next to him on the log, leaning up against his friend. 

“Ok, sure. As long as it doesn’t turn out like the last time I didn’t make dinner and we all ended up kidnapped by slavers.” He said laughing a bit, meaning to make light of it, but he saw the pain that came across his friends’ faces. “Oh, no, sorry, I didn’t mean to remind you of anything dark, I was meaning it more as a joke. Sorry.” That was stupid, bringing up that disaster. Lancelot was working to make dinner with Elyan. “So who is starting the tale for tonight then?” 

“Well, I think you should go first Merlin. I want to know… well, everything, obviously, but start with what happened at the Isle of the Blessed. And, if you know, how Gaius seemed to know what was going on before anyone else.” Arthur said, handing him a bowl of stew and sitting opposite him. 

“I’ll try. Erm, Gaius knew what was going on because I sent him a letter the morning after Samhain. I found I could send notes and things without much thought other than thinking of who I wanted it to go to. The first time I tried it was when I sent word to Lance that I was ready to come back to Camelot after seeing my mum for a bit. I can’t really explain how I can do it, please don’t ask. Anyway, I sent word to Gaius that a rift had been opened and that The Caileach had appeared to me. We were already at the base of the White Mountains so it wasn’t a far ride to the Isle of the Blessed. When we were a day out, I had asked the others to keep watch while I tried something. I, er, sort of went into a type of trance and just focused on my magic and then sent it out to scan the surrounding area. I managed to create a warm bubble of sorts to protect us from the Dorocha. But while I was scanning the area, what did I come across, but a troop of Camelot Knights led by none other than King Prat himself. As you may or may not imagine, this caused a sort of panic episode that Lance broke me out of. I couldn’t believe how close you were to us. As soon as morning came, we made for the Isle of the Blessed, but my eyes had turned gold after my trance and hadn’t seemed to change back. The closer we got to the Isle, the more my magic was reacting to the darkness the tear emanated. I couldn’t even speak. Lance, Perc, and Gwaine had to stay a ways back from me as my magic was reacting extremely, sending off tendrils of lightning. I knew you weren’t far behind us, so I had warned them to keep you back as long as they could while I closed the rift through their minds.” Merlin paused and ate a few bites while it was still warm. “When I got to the courtyard, I could feel the lightning coming off of me even more than when we were in the boat. When I went forward to meet the Caileach, she simply said  _ ‘So, Emrys you mean to challenge me’ _ . As soon as I spoke I felt all the remaining windows shatter and crash and my magic just sort of rushed out. My magic was…intense. I had zero control over it. It’s like I was simply a vessel for it to fix what the dark magic had caused.” Merlin couldn’t meet their eyes and just stared into the fire. 

“You’ll have to ask them what they felt. My side is a little...unreliable, I’m afraid. The Caileach had blanched after I spoke to her. I think the power actually frightened her. Anyway, I focused on the rift and started a spell. I don’t remember the words, I don’t even know where it came from, honestly. But I could feel the spirits lashing out that I was closing the rift. They struck out at me trying to get me to lose my concentration. I felt when you had come in the room, Arthur. Knowing you were there, and that you were safe, it gave me the strength I needed to close the rift completely. But not before an icy shard of darkness hit me right here.” Merlin put his hand on over his heart, remembering the intense cold that overcame him. He shivered involuntarily. “The rift had been closed and I felt myself fall in to darkness. That was the last I remembered before waking up to breakfast the next day.” He finished and ate the rest of the stew. 

“It was a strange sight to behold, I’ll tell you that.” Percival started. 

“The raw power that came off of just your voice when you spoke, I could barely stay standing without a firm hold on the wall.” Lancelot added.

“It was scary to be that close to you, mate. The power coming off of you, I’m honestly surprised that Caileach being didn’t just close up and take off on her own.” Gwaine said playfully.

“I guess that leaves our side then.” Arthur said. “Well, I don’t think I can get over the shock of getting to the Isle and finding Lancelot, Gwaine, and Percival standing at the back of this courtyard while you weaved the rift closed surrounded by light. I tried to come forward, but the others stopped me. Once the rift was closed, I ran forward and barely caught you before your head cracked on the ground. I’ve never felt someone so cold before. We hurried back to the shore and the horses to try to get as much ground covered as possible trying to get you back to Camelot. We stopped at a stream to rest for a few hours. Your hand ended up dipping in the water and we noticed something that seemed to be running over you almost like water. A voice spoke to us. It was a woman’s voice, and she said they were called Vilia. They worked to heal you through the night and told us that you had a destiny that had been written since the dawn of time.” He paused and looked at Merlin who, if possible, paled at those words. “They told us we were safe to rest for the night. Naturally we took that time to gain insight. Lancelot filled us in on some happenings. Namely the surges of energy that apparently were coming from you this whole time. I don’t suppose you know much about this so called destiny?” 

He had to clear his throat. “Erm, I only know of a prophecy, which I guess could be considered my destiny. I’m not sure. There is much that I don’t know that I’m still learning about as far as my abilities go.”

“Hmm. Well, we will be here with you while this is sorted out. You’re still going to continue with sword lessons with Lancelot, so don’t think these newfound powers are going to get you out of that. And you’ll continue to be my manservant so I can keep a close eye on you. We’re going to add in some more basic self-defense. Percival can train you there. I’ll test you once a week on these skills to see how you’re progressing. I know I will feel better knowing you can handle a weapon as well as your magic. Until I can figure out and work to change some laws, it needs to remain a closely-guarded secret. Understand?” Arthur finished looking directly in Merlin’s eyes. 

He groans and sinks down against the log. “Is all that really, absolutely necessary? I’m not terrible with a sword, but I really don’t like carrying one. If you  _ must _ insist, though, my training should be kept out of the sight of the others in the castle and citadel. It would definitely raise plenty of questions on why all of a sudden you’re spending so much effort training a servant.”

“You’re right. Any ideas, then?” Arthur asks the group.

“We could train in the forest outside the citadel after nightfall.” Percival suggests. 

“Ok, we will give that a shot and see how it goes for a week or two. We will do the testing just before dawn at the end of each week.” 

“Ugh” Merlin groans again leaning his head back on the log. The others simply laugh enjoying the idea of training him. They get up to clean the dishes and turn in for the night. As they lay there, he can’t help but reach out with his magic. He forms images in the embers and sends them soaring amongst the stars. A dragon flies through the night sky over them. It resembles the Pendragon crest. A warmth envelopes the camp. He realizes as he drifts off to sleep that he inadvertently put a shield up around them as his eyes close and he drifts off to sleep smiling as the dragon disappears amongst the stars. 

Once Merlin was asleep Arthur got the others’ attention. “I want to make this clear, as I’m not going to repeat myself. You will guard this secret, you will guard Merlin as if you were guarding me. If it is discovered any outside of this group have betrayed this trust, you will be stripped of any nobility and banished. Should I be the one to witness the betrayal, I cannot guarantee you will live long enough to experience banishment. Do I make myself clear?” Arthur had no doubts that the Round Table Knights would guard Merlin with their lives. It had to be said in the presence of all as the two other Knights with them, Sir Corbett and Sir Eoin were both newer. He hadn’t wanted to single them out. Percival and Lancelot had already sworn they would protect Merlin, and he knew Gwaine would as well. They all put their hands over their hearts and swore they would. Good. He’d hate to have to banish or kill any one of them.

“Good.” He said. “Now get some rest. I’m not sure how long this shield will last or if it will keep everything out. Sir Leon, your first watch, then Sir Eoin, Lancelot, and Percival will be last. Gwaine, you’re to keep a close eye on him.”

“Of course, Princess. It goes without saying.” Gwaine mock bows from his bedroll causing Arthur to roll his eyes. 


	7. Back to Camelot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another round of Never have I ever, Merlin starting to trust his friends with some more of his secrets.

The slavers, Gregor and Balin had managed to escape before the Camelot patrols came through, arresting and rounding up all the bandits who had attacked the King and his Knights. They were both bitter. Balin, because he had so been looking forward to breaking that servant. The boy. There was something about him that the others were extremely protective over. He wanted to get to the bottom of why. He knew Gregor was upset on missing out on the reward of handing the King of Camelot over to Odin. He’d managed to set up again on the outer edges of Cenred’s kingdom, by the Forest of Assetir. Not ideal, but business wasn’t going terribly, especially with Jarl no longer operating here. After the spirits had gone through their hideout, half of their prisoners had died. Frozen on the spot. The Southrons still came through and paid for the remaining captives as they had been amassing a sizable force. No matter what happened, Balin could not get the boy out of his mind. He intended to recapture him by any means. 

“Balin? Are you listening?’ Gregor said with irritation. 

“I’m listening. I’ve just had other things on my mind. I am going to ride out this week and seek out our spies in Camelot and see what news they have. I’m not satisfied that those Camelotians escaped.” This was more or less true.

“Is that all? Not still thinking about that boy, then?” Gregor asks. Straight to the point then.

“You know me too well, brother. There’s more to him, I know there is. He’s a problem that I need to unravel. I’ll see what else I can scrounge up and be back in a month. Think you can handle things without me that long?”

Gregor laughs at this. “Do what you need to do. If you can get the boy and bring him back here, that might be the better option. I’ll expect to see you in a month then.” At that Balin walks out, focusing already on his prey. He will not be outwitted or caught unaware again. The giant caught him off-guard last time when he tore the cell door off to get to the boy. So he’ll just have to make sure to get him alone. Let the hunt begin!

*********

The next day of riding was easy going. They hadn’t encountered anyone. Merlin kept his hood up and his head as covered as much as he could. He knew his eyes were still not back to normal and wasn’t sure when that would happen. This was getting ridiculous! Honestly! It’s been like this for days now. They had to go back to normal soon or he would have to work up some kind of glamour to mask them when he was around other people in the castle. 

“Merlin, you with us?” Leon asked questioningly. 

“What? Sorry lost in thought.” A blush crept up his face and he was glad that the hood covered him so the others couldn’t see.

“We’re going to stop up here for the night and should arrive back in Camelot by mid-morning tomorrow. You and Gwaine get some firewood, Sir Corbett is going to cook tonight.” Leon repeated.

“Ah. Alright.” He replied. They dismounted in a clearing and started setting up their campsite. He and Gwaine went off to gather some wood to set a fire going. 

“So, Merlin, you in the mood for some shenanigans tonight? Or perhaps a wager?” Gwaine asked with a mischievous look in his eyes and a lopsided grin.

He chuckled at his friend. “You have something in mind, I take it?”

“Well, I might do. How about another round of ‘Never have I ever’?” He asked.

“What is it you’re trying to find out?” Merlin asked, tilting his head slightly.

“It’s either that or a truth or dare game. Thought it would ease some of the tension from last week. Plus I’m hoping to get you a little drunk again.” 

“The truth comes out!” Merlin exclaims laughing. “Alright I’ll play your game. What’s the wager then? How long will it take me to get drunk? Or how much can you trick me in to telling you? You know, that last time we drank? That was only the second time I’ve been drunk. The first was almost a disaster,” he said, remembering in Ealdor when Will snuck wine and they got drunk in the woods. He couldn’t help but laugh at the memory.

“Oh, now that’s a story I need to hear!” Gwaine said excitement clear in his voice.

“Er, well, I was 15, it was right before I came to Camelot actually, and I was still trying to get control of my magic. It had a mind of its own even then. But, under the influence of wine and Will, I somehow ended up growing an apple tree in the midst of the woods. I grew it right underneath Will’s feet so he was stuck high up in the air with no way to get down.” Merlin started laughing again remembering Will’s face. “I had to have a branch lower him down most of the way to the ground but it left him hanging there. He was so mad! I was laughing so hard that I couldn’t concentrate to help lower him down so I went to grab him and help him down and the branch snapped and he landed on top of me and we ended up rolling a ways into a nearby creek.” He stopped talking, remembering what happened next, not wanting to tell Gwaine, not sure if that secret was one he wanted to share. When he looked up at his friend, he knew he could tell Merlin was holding something back.

“Will sounds like a great friend, getting you to cut loose. I wish I could’ve met him.” 

“You would have got on pretty well. He was almost a worse influence than you.” Merlin chuckles and decides to trust in his friend. “We were so drunk we couldn’t move out of the water, just lay there letting it run over us and looking up at the stars. I was so happy. When he kissed me, I wasn’t sure what to do. My brain was muddled. It was my first kiss. I don’t know why he did it, but I know I didn’t mind. Will had always been the one who was there for me, so I held some affection for him. The drink seemed to amplify those affections for both of us. After a while, we got out of the creek finally and stumbled back home soaked to the bone as the sky was starting to lighten.” He smiled at the memory.

“I’m sorry you’ve had to lose those you’ve held affection for. It can’t have been easy.” Gwaine said, reaching out to him hesitantly, giving him a small tug on his ear. 

“With Freya, it was like love at first sight. It was wild and made me reckless and want to abandon everything with her. With Will, it was just, easy and relaxing. Like a warm spring day, full of potential. It’s strange. I know there aren’t many that could ever accept that I would have been happy with either of them. But I trust you, Gwaine. I want to be able to talk to you all like you talk with me. But, just for now, maybe keep this one secret between us? I don’t want to have the royal prat looking at me any more strangely than he already does because of who I may or may not have interest in or affections for.”

“Merlin. I don’t think there is anything you can say to the Princess that will make him think any less of you. Thank you for trusting me.” Gwaine put his arm around his shoulders as they headed back with the collected wood. 

“What took you two so long?” Arthur griped as the pair walked back in the camp. 

Merlin simply raised an eyebrow at him. “Sorry, wanted to make sure we had enough wood.” Merlin could see the anxiety all over his King’s face. Had he been that worried? Hmm.

“No need to get excited, Princess. Merlin and I just decided tonight would be a good night for another round of games, if you’re interested.” Gwaine said heading to his saddle bags to grab the wine he had hidden. 

“Is that really a good idea?” Lancelot asked.

“Why not? We’re not far from Camelot, we’re more in number than last time, and all the bandits who had previously been here have been chased off by all the patrols that were sent out. I think it’s a great idea. Besides, Gwaine wants to see if he can get me drunk again.” Merlin says setting up wood and lighting the fire just by thinking it. The others grin, starting to see him relax again. 

“Alright, but we should eat first. That’ll give you more of a chance to not fall prey to Gwaine’s corruption.” Arthur said smiling. Sir Corbett roasted a few rabbits over the fire as well as some carrots and what looked like potatoes, though Merlin was not sure where those came from. It was really quite good. What made it better was that he hadn’t had to cook. Once all the dishes were cleaned, the fire stoked again, they took places on logs that they had set up. Cups were passed around and wine was poured. 

“So, who’s going first this time, then?” Merlin asks, curious to see where this is going to go. His hood was still up because he didn’t want his eyes to unnerve anyone. 

“I’ll start this one and we’ll just go round. That way we don’t forget whose turn it is.” Arthur said. So it was going to be Arthur, Elyan, Corbett, Leon, Eoin, Percival, Lancelot, Merlin, and then Gwaine. Should be interesting. “Never have I ever jumped naked into a lake.” Everyone laughed at this, and Gwaine, Percival, Eoin, Arthur, and Leon all drank. “Ah, come on Merlin, surely you’ve jumped naked in a lake or river at some point?” 

“I haven’t actually.” He said matter-of-factly. “I’ve been thrown in fully clothed several times, but never jumped in willingly, let alone naked.” He flinched slightly thinking about what he had just said and hoped they’d leave it be.

“What do you mean you were thrown in?” Lancelot asks.

Merlin shrugs. Had to open his mouth. “As you have discovered, I have trouble controlling my emotions at times, and my magic just...reacts. When I was younger, still trying to figure out what was going on, I would get bullied a lot. They couldn’t prove anything, but that didn’t stop them from throwing me in the nearest body of water to see if I’d drown. The war on magic was still going and one of the ways magic users were put to death was by drowning. Luckily I learned to swim quickly or I’d have never made it past five.” He said looking into the fire, not wanting to see their faces. 

“Five?!” Arthur says incredulously. 

“Yeah. Mum taught me to swim before I was three though, so it wouldn’t matter how many times they did it, I’d just swim to the other bank and wait ‘til they’d gone before going home. I couldn’t tell her about it, I knew it would break her heart. I would just tell her I went for a swim. By the time I was around 12 they finally stopped trying to drown me, for the most part. Having Will around helped. He would defend me and start fights with the other kids.” Merlin finally looked up and met Arthur’s eyes. “It’s not your fault. When Uther started his war on magic, it was spread that all magic is evil. That it corrupts. People were more afraid of Uther than killing someone that may be innocent, child or not. They tried to kill me because of how I was born and it was only because they could sense I was different. You shouldn’t worry so much though. I’m still here. It’ll take more than a few attempts on my life to get rid of me.”  _ If I can even die _ , he thought to himself. 

“THAT, is exactly why you are going to be training with Percival. We need to know you can defend yourself without having to rely entirely on your magic.” Arthur said seriously. 

“Yeah, I get it.” Merlin grumbles. 

“Alright, my turn.” Elyan says drawing our attention back to the game. “Never have I ever, fell a tree with one blow.” He says smugly looking around. Percival and Merlin were the only ones to drink there. 

“Really, Merlin?” he asks.

“Erm, wasn’t  _ exactly _ my fault. Any of the times.”

“What do you mean,  _ any _ of the times?” Eoin asks.

“Uh, erm. Well, when I was 14, um, I may have gotten angry about something and lashed out in the midst of the woods near home, and well, it was a fairly old tree anyway. The real trouble came when it smashed into Old Man Simmons’ house.” Merlin shuddered remembering the beating that had earned him. 

“There’s more that happened, isn’t there?” Percival asked. 

Merlin nodded, knowing how much trusting them with his story meant to them. “I had used a lot of magic, and it wore me out. Old Man Simmons found me next to the base of the fallen tree. He yelled a lot, told me how much of a bastard I was and how everyone would be better off if I’d just died at birth. Then he just started hitting me with a branch he found. I couldn’t defend myself because I’d used too much magic, I was exhausted. I got lucky that he only got about a dozen or so hits in before Will found us and nearly threw him down the hill. He was so mad. He helped me get back home and tried to clean me up. Hoping to get it taken care of before my mother could find out. Naturally she came in while Will was using a rag to wipe the blood from my back and arms. That was a year before I came to Camelot.” Merlin said, finishing his story. “Another time was when we were attacked by some bandits while searching for Morgana. I may have used a bit of magic to force an axe that was intended for me through a tree, which then toppled over on the bandit.” He added that bit so they would stop looking at me so sullenly. “Please, let’s move on, if you get like this every time I share something about my past, you lot are going to be a mess. It’s done. I’m still here.” Gwaine reaches over and puts a hand on his shoulder. 

“Thank goodness for that, otherwise I doubt Princess would be here.” He winks at Arthur after that. Merlin let out a small laugh. 

“My go then. Hmm. Never have I ever…escaped from or through Camelot’s dungeons.” Corbett said. Everyone except the newer Knights drank to this. “Really? All of you?” he asked, taken aback.

“Some of it was sneaking in, some sneaking someone else out. The dungeons really are quite easy to get out of.” Merlin said, trying to contain his laughter.

“I’ll take your word for it.” He accepted, still a little stunned.

“Never have I ever had a javelin thrown at me.” Leon says looking around. Of course Merlin takes a drink. 

“Yeah, sorry about that.” Arthur says a bit sheepishly. 

“An apology? Wow, the world must be coming to an end!” He shouts, grinning.

“Oh, shut up, Merlin. No need to be so dramatic.” Arthur says. The others just laugh at the bickering. 

“Hm. Never have I ever, stopped an assassination attempt.” Eoin says. 

“Great, it’s single out Merlin night.” Merlin says taking a quick drink. 

“Exactly how many assassination attempts  _ have _ you stopped?” Corbett asks curiously. 

“Erm. I’ve kind of lost count, actually. There are so many people angry about Uther and his war on magic that there was constantly someone out to either kill him or Arthur.” 

“You protected a King that you knew would have had you killed?” Eoin asks, genuinely. 

“Well, yes. He was driven by his grief. It wasn’t entirely his fault. Letting Uther be killed wouldn’t have done anything for me. If he had died by magic, then it would have confirmed everything that he had taught Arthur about it. All magic users are evil and corrupt. I would have eventually been found out and been executed or banished and I couldn’t let him be unprotected. One of the first attempts on Uther that I had uncovered, I wasn’t sure what I was going to do. Morgana had plotted with Tauren, you remember him Arthur, Leon? To kill Uther. I was torn on what to do after what happened with Tom. Gwen actually reminded me what the right thing to do would be. She was so strong even though her father had just been killed. I asked her what she would do if she had the power of life and death over Uther, if she could kill him, what would she do? And she said that if Uther died she would feel nothing. She said, ‘what would that solve? It would make me a murderer. It would make me just as bad as him’. Of course she was right. I just needed the nudge to take action.” He let that sink in for a bit and Arthur just gaped at him. 

“Never have I ever worn a disguise.” Percival says moving the game along. Arthur, Merlin, Eoin, and Leon all drank. Merlin almost spit his drink out remembering Leon’s disguise and couldn’t stop laughing. 

“Merlin, it’s not funny.” Leon says turning red. 

“I’m sorry, you’re right.” Merlin pauses, “it’s not funny. It’s hilarious.” And then he falls over on Gwaine trying to get his laughter under control. 

“Care to share?” Percival asks. 

“NO. He does not!” Leon says quite sternly which did nothing to ease Merlin’s amusement. “Lancelot, it’s your turn.”

Lancelot just grins. “Alright, never have I ever, scaled a castle wall.” Arthur, Merlin, Gwaine, and Corbett are the ones drinking now. “How could you possibly scale a castle wall, Merlin?” Lancelot asks incredulously. 

“With extreme difficulty. And if I can help it, I never want to do it again. Twice was more than enough for me.” He answered. 

“Oh, come on, Merlin, it wasn’t that bad. You made it to the top just fine each time.” Arthur said grinning. 

“No. Get that thought out of your head right now!” Merlin says nearly shouting at him. He recognized that glint in the King’s eye. 

“Absolutely not! It’s a great idea! I think it would do you some good to learn how to properly scale a wall. Gwaine can train you on that one. I know he’s got experience scaling walls of places he’s not supposed to be in.” Arthur finishes. 

“Certainly.” Gwaine says grinning. Merlin just groans. 

“Alright, my turn I suppose. Erm, never have I ever had someone else dress me.” Merlin says with a grin. Arthur, Leon, Corbett, Eoin, and even Gwaine drink to that. 

“Gwaine? Care to explain?” Arthur asks.

“Well, since we’re all being open and honest, and Merls has decided to trust us with his secrets, I suppose I can let mine go. My, er, my father was a Knight for Caerleon. So even though my mother was left with nothing after he died, apparently the King had decided to attempt to make an ally of me early on and brought me to the castle a few times to try to get me to be a Knight for him. It didn’t end well, at least, not for Caerleon.” He said looking down. 

“You’re a noble?!” Arthur near shouts, incredulous. “Do you know how much that could have helped you when you were around for the melee? I wouldn’t have had to defend you, it would have been the word of a noble against the word of someone impersonating a noble.” 

“I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want any special treatment. Merlin only got it out of me after a long drink filled night at the tavern. You remember that, Merlin had you pay for it, and then we paid for it by having to polish the boots for the entire army.” 

“Still. I’m glad you told us.” Arthur says looking at Gwaine. 

“Yeah, yeah. Let’s move on, eh? Never have I ever tried to hide so others were comfortable around me.” He said and just stared at Merlin. Who attempted to glare back and took a drink. 

“Merlin, why  _ do _ you still have that cloak on? You can’t be cold, and it's dark out so it’s not to block the sun. Are you trying to hide from us?” Elyan asks sincerely. 

“I just know that my eyes haven’t gone back to normal yet and I didn’t want to unnerve anyone.”

“Merlin, take the hood off. It is far stranger for you to be the only one sitting here hiding your face, then it is for us to look you in the eye. No matter what color they are.” Leon said. 

“If you’re sure.” He says looking at each of them before reaching up and lowering the hood. He kept his eyes on the ground as a sense of panic started to creep in. He couldn’t help it. For some reason the thought of looking them in his eyes while he didn’t have full control of his magic just caused him to feel a tightness in his chest. He wanted to get up and get away from them so he didn’t hurt anyone accidentally. He put his hands on his temples and tried to take some deep breaths knowing he needed to be able to calm himself down. Hands were on his shoulders and it helped him feel a bit more centered. Less like falling, more… secure. With a final deep breath in, he shakes his head out and feels a burst of energy roll off. “Sorry. Still adjusting.” He says finally looking up at them to see their worried expressions. He tries to smile, but it doesn’t really come across. Gwaine still has his arm around his shoulders. The feeling is comforting.

“You know, Merlin, we are going to need to get you to be a little less dramatic about this at some point.” Arthur says teasingly. Merlin can’t help but smile a big goofy smile at him. 

“I can’t help it. I was scared for so long about what would happen if you found out that it’s not going to be easy to just break that habit. I’ll work on it though. As long as you can be patient with me about it.” He says looking at everyone. 

“Well we don’t want you to accidentally blow Camelot across the sea by any means so until you get this under control, one of this group will be with you at all times.” Arthur says. Merlin rolls his eyes. 

“Prat”

“Idiot”

“Clotpole”

“Dollop-head”

“That’s my word!”

“And it suits you, Merlin!” 

“Oi, you two! You can bicker later! We’re in the middle of a game here!” Leon hollers causing everyone to crack up at the familiar antics. Merlin blushes hard this time and, of course, since he doesn’t have his hood on, everyone sees. Which causes even more laughter. 

“Ok, ok. Hmm. Never have I ever gone on a quest with Merlin.” Arthur says grinning and taking a drink. Gwaine takes a drink also. 

“Well, we all know that Merlin is more or less attached to Arthur when it comes to any kind of quest, but what about you Gwaine? Care to tell the story?” Elyan encourages.    
“You remember last time we played Merlin told the tale of how we narrowly escaped that tavern and headed for the Perilous Lands?” Most nod their heads, but Corbett and Eoin were confused. 

“You went to the Perilous Lands? And survived?” Eoin asks.

“Alright, I can take this back a bit. I was at a tavern in Engerd and some scoundrels got a bit mad they’d lost a wager. Anyway, I look up as the door opens and there’s Merlin! He just comes in and says ‘ _ Hello, Gwaine! _ ’ ‘Course then we had to run as the fellows who wanted money gave chase. We ran through the old citadel and came up to a wall, while we were running and I had asked Merlin why he was there, as he’s not the type to go to a tavern. He said the princess was on a quest and was in trouble, and needed some help. We got to a somewhat high wall, there was some hay stacked at the bottom and I gave Merls a little push to get him going and followed after. Wasn’t too bad of a drop. We took off headed to the Perilous lands then. We got to a bridge and there was a very small man standing there. I was tying up my horse and he said something about ‘ _ Magic has arrived! _ ’, had no idea what he was talking about, but the way Merlin had tensed up told me that it was a secret he wasn’t keen on sharing. When I got over he called me strength, and then turned my sword into a giant flower! We made it further down the road the next day and saw something in the sky circling something smaller on the ground. Turns out they were wyverns circling Arthur. We ran to catch up and get to the crumbling castle and separate to search out the princess. I guess Merlin found him first because when I got to them I got there just in time to take out one of the wyverns. We wandered through the castle looking for something that was supposed to be there, a trident I believe. Merlin here steps off the stairs and sets off a booby trap causing a door to shut between him and us. Eventually the princess gets the door opened and we retrieve Merlin and head off back to Camelot. The strange part was Merlin’s face when we got through to him. Looked a little shaken. What exactly happened to you in there and why was it you knew the princess was in danger to begin with?” He asks looking at his friend. 

“Ah. Erm, well, since you know of my magic now I suppose I can actually fill in the blanks. When Arthur was setting off, I felt some powerful magic coming from a jewel. Turns out Morgana had given him an Eye of the Phoenix. It’s a jewel that drains the life force of whoever wears it. I knew her intent was to make sure Arthur didn’t survive the journey. The eye would work to continuously drain any energy he had. It would kill him. But, I couldn’t very well just announce that Morgana, the King’s daughter, had intentionally aimed to kill her half-brother the Crown Prince in order to try and steal the throne. So having picked up Gwaine, we headed to try and catch up. The little man on the bridge was called Grettir. He, er, he told me that this was actually my quest, not Arthur’s. He told me that the Fisher King had long awaited my arrival and not to deny him his request.”

“Wait, stop. The Fisher King was alive?!” Arthur asked, trying to stay with the story. All Merlin could do was attempt to clear his throat. 

“Yes. He was. I’ll get to that. But, something you should know, is that I, er, I am the last Dragon Lord. It is an ability that is passed from Father to son, once the father passes away.” He paused trying not to think too much about holding his father in his arms when he took his last breath. 

“That would mean that man, Balinor, was your father.” Arthur said. Merlin just nodded. “Did you know all this time?”

He shook his head, “No. I’d only just found out right before we set out to find him. I knew him for just those two days and every day I wish we could have had even another hour.” He felt a tear roll down his cheek that he hadn’t realized came out. “Anyway, when we approached the castle Gwaine said that the wyverns were distant cousins of the dragon. It actually made me more relaxed as I can control dragons. When Gwaine and I separated to see who could find Arthur first. I knew he would be very close to dying by now. I heard the wyverns crash through a door and got lucky there was another entrance. I got between them and Arthur and used dragon-tongue to send them on their way. I grabbed the jewel off Arthur and put it in my pocket and he started coming ‘round. And you know Arthur, he saw me and started shouting straight off. While he was shouting another wyvern had come in behind me that I wasn’t prepared for. Luckily Gwaine showed up right then and ran it through. Arthur stormed off and we followed. I felt something when we were walking, that’s why I stepped off the stairs into that throne room. I wasn’t paying attention when I set off the trap. I tried banging on the door, but a voice sounded from the room behind me. When I turned and walked towards the throne, the Fisher King was sitting there looking at me. All I could say was,  _ ‘So you are still alive’ _ . His response was  _ ‘for now’ _ . Gwaine and Arthur were making a lot of noise on the other side of the door and the Fisher King said it was my friends  _ Courage _ and  _ Strength _ . He said  _ ‘without their help, you would not be here’ _ . He told me he wanted an end to his suffering. He said that the time of the Once and Future King had arrived and his time was at an end. He dropped the trident on the ground and offered me a vial; water from the Lake of Avalon. He said he had waited for the right person to claim it and that person was me. He called me the chosen one. He said  _ ‘Albion’s time of need is near. And in that dark hour you must be strong. For you alone can save her. Your powers are great, but you will need help’ _ . He told me when all seems lost that the water would show me the way. But of course, as with most magical gifts, it came with a price. He had given me a gift and demanded one in return. He asked for the Eye of the Phoenix. When I put it on his wrist he swirled away in a type of whirlwind and disappeared. That’s when these two finally made it through the door.” Merlin said taking a drink due to speaking so much. He noticed his cup was a little fuller, instead of emptier. It seemed Gwaine had poured more in when he wasn’t paying attention.

“That is a lot to unpack there, Merlin.” Arthur said, staring at him. “You could have told me some of that, like about the jewel after Morgana attacked this last time. I would have believed you. At least I’d like to think I would.”

“I know Arthur. But I was locked in a silent battle with Morgana for most of the year she was back. I knew she had turned on us after she’d been back with us for only a few days. We can talk about what happened during that year if you want, but I don’t think Gwaine brought enough to drink to discuss all that just now.” He says grinning crookedly at him. Arthur just laughs. 

“You are probably right. But. This isn’t done with. When we get back, at some point we will sit down and you will tell me what happened during that year. It’s not a request, it’s a command.”

“Of course, Sire!” Merlin says mockingly. 

“Alright, my turn. Never have I ever been in the stocks!” Elyan says excitedly. Merlin just groans and takes a drink. The others just laugh. 

“Pretty sure I spent most of my first year in Camelot in the stocks. And a bit of my second.” 

“If you would have kept your head down and not caused any trouble, you probably could have got on just fine.” Arthur said. 

“You know that some of the times I was there was because you were under an enchantment and I had tried to cover for you with your father, right?” 

“I don’t remember that actually. My memory of that incident isn’t the greatest. But we agreed not to bring it up again.” He says pointing at him.

“I would never, Sire!” Merlin says feigning shock. This just causes the others to burst out laughing again. 

“Never have I ever unleashed a curse,” Corbett says. Groaning, Arthur drinks. 

“Care to elaborate, Sire?” Corbett asks. 

“Honestly it was an accident.” Arthur says.

“Maybe the first time, but the second? If you and your father had listened to me and Gaius there wouldn’t have been a second time, I believe.” Merlin chip in. 

“Alright, then  _ Mer _ lin, since you’re so keen on telling them, you tell it.” Arthur says sarcastically. 

“Well the first time, Arthur killed a unicorn. As you can imagine, they are magical creatures, pure of heart. And to kill one unleashed a curse upon the kingdom. In order to reverse it, Arthur had to complete some tasks to prove he was pure of heart. It was not an easy time in Camelot. And Uther refused to send for help from any of the neighboring kingdoms he had treaties with. The second time, some of you know a bit of it, Uther was excavating under the castle and had uncovered the tomb of Cornelius Segan. We, Gaius and I, warned Uther that the tomb should be sealed off. Of course no one listens to us. Someone had blabbed about the tomb down at the tavern and this fellow Cedric, decided he would worm his way into getting access to it.” He tried to keep calm, but the betrayal there still angered him. He could feel the electricity in the air. Hopefully he could keep it under control. “Anyway, we went on a hunt, a huge boar came out of the woods and was headed straight for Arthur. Everyone seemed to have forgotten their weapons so I used my magic to throw a spear at it. ‘Course I couldn’t say it was me, so Cedric claimed it was him. To which Arthur decided, due to the extreme flattery he was getting, to give him a job. By more or less replacing me. Granted I could probably have handled it better, but I was only 16 and felt betrayed. Arthur told me to take some time off and Cedric would look after him for a while. That’s all he needed. As soon as Arthur had gone to sleep Cedric stole the keys and made his way to the tomb to raid it. He was struck by the massive blue heart shaped gem. Once he pried it from its resting place he released the spirit of Cornelius Segan. His spirit took over Cedric’s body. I tried to confront Arthur about it the next day, but he wouldn’t listen. I may have lost control of my emotions and tried to attack Cedric. Not my smartest move, I’ll grant you, but I was mad that I was so easily cast aside.” Lightning started to crackle around him, so he did what he could to breathe deeply and get it together. “Arthur tossed me in the cells that night. While I was there, Segan, using Cedric’s body, used a spell to bring the statues and gargoyles to life. The citadel was in chaos. I broke out of the cells and ran to Gaius to see if he knew what I could do. He sent me to the Great Dragon who provided me with a powerful spell to free and then re-trap Segan’s spirit. When I got back to the courtyard, Arthur was unconscious on the ground and injured. A gargoyle dove at him and I blasted it to pieces with my magic. Of course Segan saw this. He asked me to rule alongside him and bring Camelot to its knees. Just so you know, he wasn’t the first, and I doubt he’ll be the last, to ask me to join him. I’d be pret-ty wealthy if I could have even one gold coin every time someone offered me to join them in their evil plots. Anyway, I told him no, in more or less words, and he got a bit upset by that and said if I wouldn’t join him, he’d become me and harness my power to his will. His spirit then left Cedric’s body and came towards me. I couldn’t use the spell I had until his spirit was trying to take over my body. I was able to trap him back in the stone and Gaius and I got it back to where it belonged. Luckily the King saw how dangerous Segan’s tomb could be and had it sealed off again.” He took one deep breath in and released it along with the crackling energy that had accidentally whipped up. 

“Huh.” Arthur said.

“What?” Merlin asks.

“I mean looking back, knowing you were so young, actually makes sense how you reacted to everything. I admit, I enjoyed the flattery. Maybe that’s why I ignored your warnings. So, exactly how many times has an evil sorcerer asked you to join them?” He asks, genuinely curious. 

“Erm, a fair few.” Merlin can feel his face heating up and hopes that the fire blocks some of the redness going to his ears. Arthur just smiles, and Gwaine gives him a squeeze, arm still around his shoulders. 

“Hmm. Never have I ever interfered in a tournament” Leon says. Of course Gwaine and Merlin drink both chuckling about it, causing others to raise their eyebrows, which made him laugh harder. “We all know Gwaine interfered with the melee, what was the last tournament you interfered with, Merlin?”

“Um the last one I interfered in was when Uther and Arthur both fought and Arthur had let his father beat him.” He paused hoping they would leave it at that. 

“And?” Leon urged. 

“And…the, er, the boy that Uther fought in the finals was a young sorcerer.” He rushed out.

“You knew and you didn’t say anything?” Arthur asked, getting a little upset. 

“I took care of it. I talked to him and tried to get him to withdraw. When he killed his opponent he was planning to withdraw, but the way everyone treated him afterwards, he enjoyed it, the attention. They were treating him with respect and he was used to being walked on. We could relate to each other. I hadn’t told him that I had magic, not at first. But when he said he’d withdraw, and didn’t, I needed to find a way to get through to him.” He closed his eyes and imagined the scene where they talked at the inn. He waved his hand in the air and the scene played out before the others. 

Merlin was standing in the room with Gili.  _ I thought you weren’t going to fight? _ He said.  _ You’ve seen the way people are now. They’re showing me respect. You don’t know what that’s like for me  _ Gili said.  _ I do _ , Merlin said.  _ No. No, no one does _ Gili said. Merlin turned around and closed the door. He raised his hand and whispered a spell making a small flame in his hand and held it out to the other boy.  _ It’s…lonely. To be more powerful than any man you know and have to live like a shadow. To be special and have to pretend you’re a fool. I know, how it feels. I, understand. _ Merlin says.  _ Then you understand why I have to fight. If Uther is killed, so what? How many of our kind have died at his hands? How many more will?  _ Merlin shakes his head.  _ It’s time those with magic fought back _ Gili said getting angry.  _ Gili _ , Merlin started.  _ You can’t tell me what to do _ he shouts.  _ You need to learn to use your magic for good that is its true purpose, it’s not meant for your own vanity,  _ Merlin nearly yells.  _ I’m not going to apologize for who I am. You can be a servant and…and pretend that you’re less than them but I’m not going to!  _ Gili shouts.  _ No, that’s not what I do!  _ Merlin says.  _ No? You’re defending the King! Protecting a man that would have you dead.  _ Gili says.  _ I’m protecting you! _ Merlin shouts back.  _ You’ve been pretending for so long now that you’ve actually forgotten who you are.  _ Gili says walking up to him.  _ No. That’s not true _ Merlin says barely above a whisper.  _ Isn’t it? _ Gili asks.  _ No.  _ Merlin answers, shaking his head.  _ It’s time someone struck a blow for the likes of you and me. And if you’re too weak, then I will.  _ Gili left the room. The scene changed to Uther and Gili fighting in the arena. The two were fighting and Merlin caused Gili’s shield to roll away. Gili hit Uther’s shield and moved to strike Uther through his shield and Merlin’s eyes flashed and caused the sword to stick. The two magic users kept catching the others eyes. Hurt and betrayal flashing between them, until the King was victorious. They were back at the inn now, and Gili was packing up his things.  _ I had no choice _ , Merlin said.  _ You did what you had to do _ Gili responded,  _ and you betrayed your kind. No that was you _ , Merlin said.  _ You betrayed us. You’d won, but you were going to kill the king anyway? There’s no honor in that. You’re better than this. Magic is not there for fighting, it’s not meant to bring you glory  _ he said sitting down at the chair in the room. Gili had sat on the bed,  _ I never understood my father. I thought he was afraid of magic, but he wasn’t. He was afraid of what it can do, how it can corrupt. I know now that he was…he was strong. Well, he was stronger than me,  _ Gili said as he picked up his pack and made to leave.  _ I’m sorry,  _ Gili said.  _ Now, I know it doesn’t seem like it now, but, one day, magic will be permitted once again. When that day arrives, you’ll no longer have to hide who you are, your gifts will be recognized and we… we will be free. And who knows, maybe, maybe then our paths will cross again _ , Merlin tells him.  _ I hope so _ , Gili says.  _ Oh, they will. We’re kin,  _ he says pointing between them.  _ Kin _ , Gili says softly shaking Merlin’s hand. 

Merlin let the image drift away and grabbed his head as a wave of dizziness washes over him nearly causing him to fall over. Luckily Gwaine had ahold of him. 

“Thanks for that,” Merlin said softly to him. He looked up and noticed the others just staring at him. “Sorry, I didn’t realize I could do that. Thought I’d give it a go and see if I could show you a memory. If you want to see something like that again, though, I’m going to have to practice and build up some of my strength again.” He says leaning back against the log. The others are still staring. “What?”

“You sounded so…sad.” Elyan said finally. 

“It was hard. Knowing I had this power, and no one to talk to other than Gaius. I wanted to believe that another magic user close to my age understood what was at stake. If Uther had died, it would have been another step to ensuring magic would never return. I…was…am…unique. Even amongst my kind, I never really fit in. When Lance found out, it was nice to have someone to share with. But he left. Anytime I had confided in someone either they left, or worse. They died. Being able to share with you lot, it helps. It’ll take me some time, but I’m counting on you all to help me feel a little less alone.” He says meeting Arthur’s eyes, then moving around to the others. He could swear he saw a couple wiping a few tears away. He hoped he hadn’t caused them too much distress. His head felt like it was swimming a bit. He knew using magic like that mixed with drinking was going to leave him with a headache in the morning. “Alright, keep the game going so you can all stop looking at me like that. Otherwise I’m going to go to bed.” He said rubbing his eyes with the palm of his hands. When he looked at his hands he noticed some blood on them and tried to quickly wipe it away, but Gwaine had seen it. He looked over to him and shook his head slightly.  _ Don’t say anything. I’m fine. It’s probably just the strain of sharing a memory.  _ He doesn’t seem happy about it, but lets it be. 

“Ok, then. Never have I ever been healed with magic” Eoin said. Leon and I drink. When Arthur doesn’t drink I simply raise my eyebrows at him, which causes Lancelot to snort and try covering it with a cough. 

“Sire.” I say

“What? I haven’t been healed with magic that I know of.” He said, looking innocent. Merlin couldn’t help it; he just started laughing. “What?” Arthur asked. 

“You have been healed with magic, more times than I can count.” Merlin says gasping for breath. 

“Name five times that I was healed with magic.” He said seriously. 

“The questing beast, when we went to find my father when the Great Dragon was attacking Camelot, you were shot with an arrow when we travelled through the Valley of the Fallen Kings, when we went to retrieve the Cup of Life and were shot with an arrow, again, not to mention at least two occasions where a love spell had to be lifted from you.” He looked so shocked. 

“You told me when we went through the Valley of the Fallen Kings that the arrow only glanced off my armor and I fell and got knocked out. What happened there?” 

Damn. Merlin pursed his lips trying to think of the best course of action. “Erm, well, the arrow struck you in the back. I couldn’t heal you. My magic…wouldn’t work. It was something to do with the curse there. Anyway, I met a Druid seer, Taliesin, and he healed you.” 

“Alright, I suppose I’ll take your word for it.” Arthur says and drinks. 

“Hmm. Never have I ever drank poison.” Percival says. Ugh. Arthur and Merlin both drink. Now Percival is giving the eyebrow. 

“Mine was unintentional.” Merlin says. “Apparently I foiled a High Priestess once too many times and she decided to try to get me out of the way. Arthurs, well, it’s a bit more… complicated. Erm, when Uther married that troll” He had to stop and try to keep from laughing, but it only made him laugh harder. “Right, when Uther married a troll, due to the enchantment he was under, the magic was too powerful for me to break. The only way to break it was to get Uther to cry real tears of remorse and regret. So, er, Arthur had to drink some poison so Uther thought he was dead. We had the antidote, and we were able to administer it before any permanent damage could occur.” He paused looking at Arthur. “Well, mostly. He’s still a bit of a cabbage head at times.” Merlin snickers. Arthur just rolls his eyes. 

“Never have I ever lived away from home.” Lancelot says smiling. Everyone but Arthur drinks. 

“Hmm. Never have I ever been drunk underage.” Merlin says smiling. Merlin, Gwaine, Leon, Eoin and Corbett all drink. 

“Arthur you never had too much to drink when you were younger?” Merlin asks.

“I never had a reason to, I guess. We had wine or ale constantly at meal times.” He said. “What about you Merlin, when did you get drunk the first time?” He asks.

“Oh, uh, Will snuck a bottle of wine and we hid in the woods and drank the whole thing. I was 15, it was just a short time before I came to Camelot. I, uh, accidentally grew an apple tree to full height right underneath him. I did what I could to get him down, but I was laughing so hard I couldn’t get him all the way to the ground. We both ended up laughing when he crashed on top of me and we rolled in to the creek.” Merlin was smiling so hard his cheeks hurt. Remembering what happened after, he felt his cheeks warm and hoped the others attributed it to the drink. 

“Never have I ever admitted I was a sorcerer or accused of being a sorcerer on more than one occasion.” Gwaine said looking directly at Merlin. 

“Gee Gwaine, who could you be talking about?” Merlin laughs and realizes he just finished his drink. He laughs and holds his cup up. “Does this mean I lost or won?” He asks the group. They all just bust out laughing. There was a warmth growing in his chest. Sitting like this with his friends made him feel so loved. His thoughts were swimming as the wine did its work. He leaned his head back on Gwaine and just stared up at the sky. 

“Well I think we all better turn in and try to get a few hours of sleep.” Arthur says heading to lay down. The others follow suit. Merlin can’t get himself to move. 

“Erm, Gwaine?” he says.

“Yeah, Merls?” 

“I can’t move.” He says and giggles. Ugh, he actually giggled! Instantly he felt his face redden. He tries to sit up and move but realizes he can’t and ends up giggling more.

“It’s alright Merls. I’ll keep an eye on you. Get some rest.” He ruffles the boy’s hair as he sinks down a little further against Gwaine. 

“Thanks, Gwaine. Thanks for everything.”

“Hey, Merlin?” Gwaine says hesitantly.

“Hmm?”

“Why did you leave Ealdor?”

“Mm. Mum said it was best. She was worried about Will, mostly that he knew about my magic, not the other part. She was happy that I was happy, ya know? One day we were out walking through the trees, just walking not holding hands or kissing or anything. We came up to our apple tree and climbed to some of the lower branches and just sat up there enjoying the view and eating our fill. I made some stupid comment, I don’t even remember what it was, and Will was laughing so hard he fell out of the tree. I knew he would probably break something, it was a pretty big drop, and I reacted as best I could; with magic. I stopped his fall and he landed safely on the ground on his back just looking up at me. I scrambled down to make sure he was ok, but a few kids from the village were nearby and saw what I did. I couldn’t very well deny my magic at that point, they’d seen it already. A few of them grabbed Will to hold him back so he couldn’t protect me. I was too scared I would hurt them, so I didn’t use my magic. They punched, and kicked me until I couldn’t see straight. Then the bigger boy from the group, Thomas, he was a few years older than me, grabbed me by my hair and drug me over to the creek and stuck my head down in it trying to drown me. I could get out of a lake by swimming, but I couldn’t do anything to keep this idiot from drowning me in a small creek. I don’t really know what happened next. I breathed in too much water and everything went dark. I woke up coughing and spitting out water. I guess they had decided to leave me believing me to be dead. They hadn’t counted on Will rescuing me. Once he saw I was breathing again he pulled me in to his lap and just hugged me. I tried telling him, it was ok. That I was fine. But the words wouldn’t come out. He kissed my head and helped me to my feet and walked back to his house. I knew what would happen as soon as I got home and mum saw me all beaten and bloodied. She had already been planning to send me to Camelot, to Gaius. I just knew that as soon as I walked through the door it would be my last night at home for a long while. Will helped clean me up a bit and we just lay down together for a little while. Just looking at each other. He knew what was coming too and I could feel his regret and anger. I kissed him trying to comfort him to let him know what he meant to me and that things would work out in the end. I got him to go to sleep eventually and headed home. Mum was a wreck as I’d expected. She’d already sent word to Gaius that I was on my way. She packed some things for me so I could leave first thing in the morning. When I was leaving, I looked back one last time and saw Will just standing there looking lost. I hated knowing that he was hurting because of me.” Merlin cleared his throat. He hadn’t talked about why he left in a long time. All he had told Arthur was that he didn’t fit in anymore. Which was still true. In a way. “Now, don’t think, that just because I’ve shared this all with you, it gives you the right to flirt with me,  _ Sir _ Gwaine.” Merlin said grinning. 

“I would never!” Gwaine responded mimicking shock. 

Merlin chuckled, “Thanks for listening. I know you all get a shock when I talk about my childhood and some of the things that have happened to me. But, you need to remember, I’m still alive. I’m still here. I’m still, mostly, happy. I have my good and bad days like anyone.” He feels himself falling asleep and can’t stop it. He hears Gwaine say something back but he's already asleep, breathing in the scent of the forest and the man he had fallen asleep against. 


	8. Training starts...and disaster strikes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Arthur's birthday celebrations, Gwaine shamelessly ogling Merlin, Lancelot is a mother hen.

Morning came too quickly. Merlin was hungover and his head was pounding. The others found this quite funny. Lancelot told him that his eyes were now mostly blue again. Mostly. They had some gold still showing in them, but only barely. They ate a quick breakfast and were back in Camelot in just a few short hours. Merlin worked with the stable hands to get the horses taken care of while the Knights and King unpacked and headed off to their respective chambers. Merlin knew he’d have to attend to the King shortly, so once he was finished brushing down his horse and grabbing his pack, he ran to drop it in his room. Gaius was not there so he didn’t have to answer any questions just then. He hurried down the corridors and went into Arthur's chambers, but the King wasn’t there. Ah. He’s probably sitting with his father. Merlin walked to Uther’s chambers and found Arthur sitting in the chair next to his father. Merlin decided to go and grab an early lunch for his King and his father and made his way to the kitchens. He ran in to Gwen on his way and she just wrapped him in a hug. 

“I’m glad you’re back.” She said smiling brightly at him.

“Me too. Hey, would you want to help me for a moment? I was going to grab an early lunch for Arthur and his father.”

“Of course, that’s a great idea. I know Uther has not had an easy time with Arthur being gone. I was worried that one of you might not come back. Gaius told me a little of what was going on. Why don’t we talk while we walk?”

“That’d be great!” During the walk towards the kitchen Gwen tells Merlin about Aggravaine trying to shut the gates to keep people out and how she told him that he needed to have more faith in Arthur. That it would be sorted in a few short days. She tells him how Gaius found her unconscious on the road as if someone had attacked her, but she’s fine, now, truly. And the please-don’t-tell-Arthur look accompanied it. He sighed. When they got back to Uther’s chambers Merlin walked in first followed by Gwen and they set the trays down in front of the King and his father. Merlin looked away and started to walk out when he saw the loving gazes between Gwen and Arthur. 

“Merlin?” Arthur calls. 

“Yes?”

“Make sure you polish my armor and clean my chambers. After that you can take the rest of the day to assist Gaius.” He says over his shoulder. Merlin just nods and heads out to get started. Sitting in the armory polishing the armor helps him clear his mind and reflect on his life these past few months. If this is what happens after turning 20, he can only imagine what the next years would bring. When he was done, he headed back to his room to put his things away from his saddle bags. His door was closed to the main physician’s chambers so he wasn’t seen when Aggravaine came to speak with Gaius. Merlin watched through the sliver of his door that was open and listened intently. When he heard Aggravaine asking Gaius if he’d ever encountered a sorcerer called Emrys, he thought he might pass out. Eventually he left and once the door was closed again, Merlin came out to talk with Gaius. 

“There’s only one person who could have told him that name.” Gaius said.

“Morgana.” Of course it was Morgana. She must have spoken to The Caileach when she opened the veil. The pair agreed to keep an eye on the King’s uncle. If he was working with Morgana, then he was no friend to Arthur. Merlin just hoped that he had enough of his friends’ trust that it wouldn’t cause any issues. 

*********

Over the next week of being back in Camelot, Lancelot had consistently drug Merlin out to the forest in the evenings to practice sword fighting. He was getting better, but he was still tripping on his own feet a lot. It resulted in a lot of bruises. Every other day he would train in hand-to-hand defense with Percival. He was getting more toned now. It had only been a week and already his chest was more muscle, as were his shoulders. His cheekbones, if it were possible, seemed sharper than before. All his boyishness was melting away. Gwaine was constantly staring at him, amazed at how good he was looking. Though he promised not to flirt with him, he found himself changing his mind in that regard. Honestly he was quite glad that Merlin had confessed to him that he was ok with affections for a man or a woman. Knowing that his friend had had two loves already, one young man and one young woman, made him feel much more at ease. He never thought he’d run in to someone that saw things so openly. He often found himself assisting Lancelot or Percival train him in the evenings or just simply watching. Lancelot, of course, noticed all the ogling that Gwaine had started doing openly.

“You know, he will eventually catch you staring at him, right?” Lancelot told him after a training session one day. 

“Yeah, maybe.” Gwaine says walking back toward the castle together. “Don’t ruin my daydreaming for now, though.”

“Just be, sure of what your intentions are. He’s young.” Lancelot said.

Gwaine snorted and laughed. “Mate, I’m aware. He’s only 3 years younger than me, by the way. If it makes you that uncomfortable, I can stay back from helping you train him. I’d hate to end up causing a distraction when he needs this.”

“Just, tread carefully. It’s not illegal, but, it’s also not that open around Camelot. Arthur’s birthday celebrations start tomorrow, so just try to keep from staring at him too much around the King.”

“What around the King?” Merlin asks running to catch up with them after a grueling training session. 

“Nothing, Merls. Just Lancelot being a mother hen is all.” Gwaine says ruffling Merlin’s hair, making the boy laugh. 

“Alright, if you say so. Hey do you know if Arthur plans to test me tomorrow morning before his celebrations start, or do you think he’ll hold off a day? Or week?” Merlin asks hopefully.

“Merlin. You’ve been training hard. It’s just the first test. Arthur is not going to let you go that easily. If it was your birthday, maybe. But since it’s his, well…” Lancelot shrugged his shoulders. Merlin just groaned. Lancelot and Gwaine both laughed at the reaction. 

“You’ll be fine. He’s not going to go crazy hard against you. He knows you’ve only been training for a week. He’s probably going to make sure you know all the basic stances and how to block. With the hand-to-hand though, that might get a bit rough. I know Percy’s been working with you, but just do what he showed you. And remember, this is only the first week. You can only get better from here.” Gwaine said, throwing his arm around Merlin’s shoulders, earning him a glare from Lancelot. Gwaine just winked at him. 

The trio separated when they got to the castle. Merlin headed to his room in hopes of a bath. When he got there Gaius was working on some medicines for a few of his regular patients. When Merlin walked in, his mentor didn’t even look up.

“How was training?” he asked.

“Ugh. Well, I’m still very clumsy, but I think I’ve gotten better at blocking. I’m still not near Knight-quality but I’m hoping not to get to that point. Percival is the one that has been working me the hardest. I have more muscle now, than I thought I’d ever have. The cook has taken to sneaking me a loaf of bread here, or some dumplings there. Apparently the other servants are starting to notice that I seem to be training for something even if none of them ever see it.” As Merlin is talking he pulls his neckerchief and shirt off. And grabs a bucket of water to start washing. Gaius eyes his ward suspiciously as he has noticed the muscle as well. Not just that, though. He seems to no longer be so self-conscious of his scars. The boy’s hair was disheveled. 

“You do know that you could train with your shirt off to save you from having to repair it every other day?” Gaius said. 

“Yeah, I know. I think I might be ready to do that soon. I’m just not sure I’m ready for all the staring from the others when they see the extent of my scars. I don’t want to scare them.” He says, continuing to wash his face and hair. There was a knock on the door and it swung open before they could answer. Arthur strolled in and walked in a few steps. 

“So, do you think you’re ready for your first test tomorrow, Merlin?” He asks looking at the boy who had stopped what he was doing.

“Erm, well, I don’t suppose I have another option, do I? I mean if I say I’d rather not, that won’t make you change your mind, will it?” He asks hopefully. 

“Absolutely not. I just wanted to make sure you would be ready. Also, don’t think I’ve forgotten about what we talked about on our way back from the Isle. You owe me a long talk.” Arthur was eying Merlin and taking note of all the scars and how the brand still stood out on his neck. He wondered how many of these could have been prevented if he had just trained Merlin earlier in their friendship. 

“Arthur? You’re, er, staring.” Merlin said. “I know it’s a lot, and probably more than you even expected, but, I will tell you all the tales. I promised I would. Just, not tonight. I need to try to sleep tonight so I can get ready for tomorrow morning.”

“Very well. And, Merlin? Be on time. I’d hate to put you in the stocks on my birthday.” He paused, “then again…” there was a glint in his eye of amusement. 

“No. I will be on time, and there will be no need to put me in the stocks.” Merlin says, trying to stop Arthur’s thoughts. Arthur turns and leaves then, heading back to his chambers. Merlin finished washing and ate an apple before going to sleep in preparation for the morning. 

*********

Merlin had found a way to get his magic to wake him in the pre-dawn hours so he wouldn’t be late for Arthur’s testing. He stretched as he got out of bed and pulled on a red shirt and blue neckerchief. He grabbed his jacket and headed quietly out of his room so as not to wake Gaius. He made it down to the castle steps unnoticed and headed towards the forest. When he got to the clearing they had been practicing in, he found all the round table Knights, including Sir Corbett and Sir Eoin, who had been inducted into the original group due to knowing his secret. Great. He had an audience. 

“You lot just couldn’t stay away, could you?” He asked.

“Of course not! We need to see what progress you are making.” Leon said, smiling. 

“Just, please, remember, that I am not a Knight, and it is not my goal to ever be a Knight.” He said looking at his friends. 

“Well, you don’t have to worry about that. I’m not interested in knighting you.” Arthur says as he walks in the clearing. “Alright  _ Mer _ lin, I’m just going to run you through some basic moves, and see how well you do. This is to determine if you need more time to train on swords or hand-to-hand or if you’re ready for a different skill, like knife throwing. In the future, we’ll add in chainmail to make sure you can still do the basics with the extra weight.” Merlin just gulps and nods. “Alright, let’s begin then!” Arthur says and stands a few paces in front of the boy. Merlin grabs a sword and stands opposite Arthur. Arthur attacks, but keeps his moves controlled. He is an expert swordsman, so he knows not to use his full skill set against his friend. Merlin manages to block most of the attacks and his stumbling is minimal. He tests him for another few minutes before stopping. “Very good. Lancelot, I believe you can step up the intensity with him. He’s got the basic defenses down. You’ve taught him well. Now, let’s see what you learned from Percival.” At this Arthur takes off his chain mail and sets it off to the side with his sword. He strips off his shirt as well. And stands in the same place he stood for the sword test. Merlin decides to follow suit and takes his jacket off, then his neckerchief, and hesitates for a second, before pulling his shirt off. He walks over to Arthur and tries to prepare like Percival had taught him. They grapple for about 10 minutes before Arthur has him hopelessly pinned to the ground and gasping for air. 

“Not bad,” Arthur says, helping his friend to stand up. Trying to catch his breath, Merlin can only nod and give him a small smile. “Next week, I expect you to work on your footwork some more. Lancelot is teaching you well. Percival is moving you along nicely in the hand-to-hand. I honestly didn’t think you’d last five minutes. Next week, I’m going to add in a day to start familiarizing yourself with throwing daggers. I won’t test you on those until next month. Now, go wash up and get breakfast. I’ll need a bath so bring up some water.” At that Merlin nods and gathers his clothing and heads back to the castle while the others stay planted in their spots watching him go.

“I’ve never seen so many scars on someone.” Elyan whispers. “How is he still alive?”

“He’s getting better. I wasn’t sure he’d be comfortable enough to take his shirt off or not. The fact that he did, means he’ll be able to talk about them to us soon.” Arthur says, deep in thought, watching the retreating form of his manservant. 

“We all need to make sure that we can listen and keep a clear head. If he opens up and sees how shocked we are or sees how much it disturbs us, he’ll close himself off again. So, when he’s ready, we agree to try our best to school our expressions, yeah?” Lancelot says. Everyone nods. Gwaine looks like he’s having a hard time so Lancelot puts an arm around his shoulders as they walk back to the castle. 

“You knew it was going to be bad. I knew it was going to be bad. I don’t think any of us were prepared for all of it though. Remember. He’s still here. He’s strong. Plus he has us! We’ll get him through this.”

“You really are quite the mother hen, there, Lance.” Gwaine says trying to mask his concern. “I think I’ll go check on him before I meet you at the training grounds.” Lancelot knows him too well and just squeezes his shoulder one last time before heading off to get ready for regular training. 

“Hey, Merlin?” Gwaine says as he walks in the physician’s chambers. Merlin was standing there washing himself over a bucket of water. Gwaine had to school himself not to stare. Not at the scars, but at the muscle tone that his friend had been hiding. 

“Hey Gwaine. What’s up?” Merlin asks as he leans over and washes his hair out. 

“I wanted to swing in before we started regular training and see how you were doing? You did a good job this morning. If you can get your feet to keep up with you, you’ll make a pretty decent swordsman yet.” He said walking in and sitting down on a stool by the table. 

“Thanks. I’m just glad Arthur didn’t try fighting me like he fights you lot. I am definitely not ready for that.” He says and chuckles a little. He turns his back on Gwaine and heads up to his room to grab a clean shirt and neckerchief. Gwaine was finding it very difficult not to stare.

“So, are you free to attend the feast tonight, or are you stuck ensuring his highness’ glass never runs dry?”

“Oh, well, you already know the answer to that. I might be able to sneak away for a little bit here and there. But it is his birthday so I want to make sure he has a good time. What about you? Going to try and corrupt some serving maid or another?” He says grinning. Gwaine can’t help but smile at his friends’ happiness. 

“Oh, no. I’m not about to mess with the staff here. The last thing I need is that drama while I attend to my Knightly duties.” He says with a smug look in his eyes.”Besides, none of them have caught my eye.” 

“Ok. Well, save time for a drink with me, I’ll try and sneak off for a bit.” Merlin says.

“I can do that. Now, you better hurry before the princess comes down here demanding his bath.” Gwaine says and walks out with Merlin. 

Gwaine heads back towards the training grounds to conduct his own training. His thoughts keep wandering off towards Merlin. Is he wanting to flirt with him now that he knows Merlin wouldn’t mind? Or is it because he’s always been fond of him? Whatever the case, he needed to sort it out sooner rather than later. He didn’t want to jeopardize his friendship, but he was glad to know that his advances wouldn’t offend him any. He’s so distracted by these thoughts that he realized he was just staring at the others who had already begun training by pairing off. That left him to pair up with Lancelot. Great. Just what he wanted. More unsolicited advice. Lancelot just grinned at him because he knew where Gwaine’s thoughts were. And they weren’t on training. 

“Alright, Lance, let’s see what you got.” Lancelot just raised his eyebrow at him. Daring him to make the first move. They exchanged blows for a few minutes, neither making much headway. 

“Oh, hey Merlin!” Lance says looking over Gwaine’s shoulder. Gwaine knows this is a ploy to trip him up, but he can’t stop himself from looking over his shoulder. When he does, Lance has him down, and his sword is knocked away. As he helps Gwaine up, he just shakes his head. “Come on, Gwaine. You know better than to let something or someone distract you in a bout.”

“Yeah, yeah. Just thinking is all. I’ll get it worked out at some point.” Gwaine answered feeling slightly flustered. Why did he let himself be distracted? That was stupid. Maybe it wasn’t the best idea Merlin had told him about his relationship with Will. Now it seemed to be all that was on his mind. Sitting at the fire that night when Merlin got drunk on wine and fell asleep leaning up against him, it had felt nice. But they were just friends, right? He really needed to sort this out.

“Get what worked out?” Percival asks walking up to them.

“Just wondering if we’ll be able to work out getting Merlin to celebrate tonight as well, instead of just babysitting Arthur all night.” Gwaine said.

“Hmm. Well, we can try, I suppose.” Percival shrugs. “It is Arthur’s day. So as long as he has a good time, then we might be able to steal Merlin for a bit.”

“Why would you need to steal Merlin?” Merlin asks, walking up with Arthur. 

“No reason” the three say at the same time, obviously fooling no one. Merlin just looks at them funny and goes to stand in his usual place while Arthur directs the training. That was strange, Merlin thought to himself. Maybe everyone’s just on edge because they want to make sure Arthur has a good birthday. Even Uther was able to come out of his current state long enough to talk to Arthur about it this morning. He wanted to make sure his son had proper celebrations in place. Which of course, there were. Merlin had been helping the servants set up all week. All the visiting nobility had the castle feeling fuller than it ever does. He watched the sparring and found himself paying more attention this time since he was undergoing his own training at the moment. He wondered if he’d get close to their level or not. Knowing Arthur, he’d probably do everything he could to get him close. 

Once training was over, Merlin helped Arthur out of his armor and attended a few council meetings before going to help the rest of the staff finish setting up the banquet hall for the feast. Celebrating his friends’ birthdays always made him feel pretty happy. He was excited to see the festivities because it was Arthur so celebrating a King’s birthday was always an event. Something just felt, off. He couldn’t put his finger on what it was, but something felt wrong. Once the hall was set up with the decorations, he made his way back to Arthur’s chambers to help him prepare for the feast. As he was helping his King dress, he found he lost focus on masking his facial features and was scowling. 

“Is something wrong, Merlin?” Arthur asked.

“Hmm?” Merlin replied.

“Is something wrong? You’re making a face like you ate a rotten apple.”

“Oh. Sorry.” Merlin said and tried to reset his expression, but kept failing. 

“Just, out with it. What is wrong?” Arthur said a bit exasperated. 

“I don’t know.” Was Merlin’s reply. “It’s just a feeling. Something feels…off. I didn’t want to say anything, especially not today, but it hasn’t gone away. It’s probably nothing. Don’t worry about it. Just relax and enjoy tonight.” He said and smiled at his friend.

“When you do figure out what it is, because I’m sure you will, come straight to me or Lancelot. Doesn’t matter what time it is. Your funny feelings almost always end up meaning something terrible is going to happen. Now. Let’s go. You understand your job tonight, yes? Keep my cup filled, and keep me from making a fool of myself.” Arthur says putting his hand on Merlin’s shoulder. The boy just grins and they head down to the feast. Even Uther had made it down for a little while. Though the exertion drained him and he had to retire early. Everyone was having a great time. Merlin was smiling at how drunk Arthur was and how much fun he was having. A few times Gwaine came up and would just put his arm around Merlin and whisper in his ear about making some kind of wager. He just laughed at his friend. 

“C’mon Merls! Just put his highness to bed and come back down and help us finish this fine ale. We haven’t gotten to spend much time together recently and I find I’m missing it.” Gwaine said reaching up and grabbing Merlin’s face. Merlin just blushed. 

“Gwaine, what did I say about shamelessly flirting with me?”

“That I shouldn’t. But you know me. I don’t really listen.” He winks at Merlin causing him to blush even more. 

Merlin leaned over to whisper in Gwaine’s ear, “I’ll come back later. Maybe we can talk some more tonight after everything settles down. But, you have to stop flirting with me in front of Arthur. It’s unfair.” When he stood straight again, Gwaine was the one blushing. Merlin winked and laughed at his friend. Gwaine then reached up and ruffled Merlin’s hair before going back to his seat. When Merlin turned back around, Arthur was watching him with an eyebrow raised. Of course he saw that. Ugh. He filled his King’s cup up again and went to get another pitcher, failing to hide his smile.

Lancelot came up and put a hand on his shoulder.

“How are you, Merlin? Enjoying yourself?”

“Of course! I don’t get to see this side of the clot-pole very often.” He responded brightly. 

“Well, I don’t want to cause any discomfort, but, uh, the room is kind of glowing. And if I’m not mistaken, it’s coming from you.” Lancelot said. Merlin’s face dropped. Once that happened, the room dimmed some. 

“I’m sorry. I hadn’t realized.” His eyes got wide and he was worried he might have an episode. “You don’t think anyone noticed, do you?” He said looking around the room. No one was looking in their direction though. 

“I don’t believe so. Do you know any way you can work to train with your emotions like you do with us? I know your talent isn’t a weapon, but it is still a skill that needs honed. I think you should be spending some time each week to work on that. Maybe ask one of the Round Table to sit with you while you work on it? Though probably not Gwaine.” Lancelot said, smiling at him crookedly and walked back to his table. 

After a while, Merlin helped Arthur stumble to his room. Merlin couldn’t help but laugh at his friend. He must have had more to drink than he thought. After getting back to Arthur’s room, the King decided he wanted to spend some more time with his father and headed that way. Merlin left him sitting in the chair next to Uther and shut the door behind him leaving father and son alone. He then headed back down to the feast to see what the Knights were getting up to. And, just maybe, corner Gwaine about his earlier antics. When he entered the banquet hall, most of the other guests as well as the entertainers had retired. Percival, Lancelot, Gwaine, Corbett, and Leon were still there. Apparently Elyan and Eoin had gone to bed as well having lost a bet with Gwaine. When Merlin walked in the others gave a cheer as he came over to sit with them. 

“Merlin! You made it!” Leon exclaimed. 

“I can’t very well let you lot have all the fun, now can I?” He said grinning at them. Before he knew it Gwaine had shoved a cup in his hand and thrown his arm around him. Merlin just rolled his eyes and took a drink. Even Percival found Gwaine entertaining tonight and was laughing at the pair. As much as Merlin may have been uncomfortable about the others knowing the secret he shared with Gwaine, he found he was rather comfortable sitting there with the other man hanging on him. He caught Lancelot’s eye though and Lance seemed slightly irritated. 

“What’s with the sour face, Lance?” Merlin asked.

“It’s nothing, Merlin. Have fun. I think I’m going to turn in for the night.” At that he turned and headed out. 

“Did I say something wrong?” Merlin asks the others. Gwaine was trying not to laugh. “What?”

“It’s nothing Merls. Or rather, it’s not you.” Gwaine reassured him. 

“He’s probably just being overprotective.” Corbett added slurring his words some. 

“Overprotective? Of what?” Merlin was genuinely confused and drank some more. Percival burst out laughing. He kept laughing until his eyes were watering. Leon and Corbett and Gwaine all joined in on the laughter. “What’s funny?”

“Lance is worried about you and leaving you alone with this scoundrel” Percival said nudging Gwaine.

Merlin felt his face flush and tried to hide it with his drink, but failed, causing the others to laugh even more. Eventually he was laughing with them. “Well, that’s just ridiculous!” Merlin said, trying to catch his breath.

“He thinks  _ Gwaine _ here is going to corrupt your innocence” Leon says, wiping the tears away. 

“Who says  _ I’m _ not the bad influence here?” Merlin says cheekily, causing another roar in laughter. Percival was laughing so hard he fell off his chair. Merlin couldn’t help but feel truly happy right now. His friends had accepted him fully. He started to wonder why he never shared anything with them to begin with. A shock ran through his body and he stiffened, eyes going wide, dropping his cup on the table and he shot to his feet, sending his chair flying back. He felt his eyes flare and heard thunder crack outside. “Arthur” he said. The others seemed to sober up quickly but Merlin was already off and running through the halls to Uther’s room. All he could hear was his heart pounding in his head, he had no idea if the others had jumped up to follow him or not. When he got to the room, the guards there were down. He burst through the door and found Arthur sitting on the ground cradling his father, tears streaming down his face. There was another man dead on the floor, but the damage had already been done. Uther had a stab wound in his chest by his heart. 

“Arthur! I’m so sorry. I should have been here. Are you alright? Can you stand?” Merlin asked quickly. Just then the others appeared in the doorway. “Quick, Percival, Leon help me get Uther on the bed. Corbett, get Gaius, tell him the King was attacked and Uther took the blow. Gwaine, grab some blankets and start the fire. We need to keep him warm.” Arthur just looked Merlin in the eyes, thankful his friend was there, but he seemed so lost. So, afraid. It hurt Merlin to see those things in his eyes. In no time, Uther was on the bed and Merlin was putting the blankets Gwaine had retrieved on him. Gaius had come in and Merlin ushered everyone out. Arthur refused. Merlin grabbed Arthur and took him to his chambers so Gaius could examine his patient. Once in Arthur’s room, Merlin pulled out some clean clothes and started to dress him. Something was off. He looked in Arthur’s eyes again and he saw what it was. Somehow, the King had been drugged. “Arthur, I’m going to do something for you. It might feel a bit strange, but you’ll feel better in a second, I promise.” He then placed his hands on the sides of Arthur’s face and concentrated. Merlin reached for the drug to cleanse his King’s blood. He felt his eyes shine brightly and let out a gasp when he finished, swaying slightly. The drug mixed with copious amounts of alcohol had not done Arthur any favors and used a good deal more energy than he thought it would. Arthur reached up and caught him before he could stumble back. 

“Thank you Merlin.” Arthur said as his head cleared. “I must get back to my father. Will you be alright?” 

“I’m fine. I’m coming with you. I need to see if Gaius needs any assistance.” The pair walked back down the hall. Merlin had to stop for a second as his head started to swim a few times. When they got to the room, Gaius had dressed the wound. Unfortunately the blade had pierced Uther’s heart. He would not last the night. Gaius and Merlin left Arthur to sit with his father and headed back to the physician’s chambers. They sat in silence for a while. Arthur was King already, but it didn’t make this any easier. Merlin knew all too well what it felt like to watch your father die. He was having trouble controlling his sadness. 

“I need some air. I’ll be back to check on Arthur in a minute.” And he left and went up to the battlements feeling like his magic was going to burst from him. When he reached his destination, he let his emotions rage. He pulled at his hair and sadness, anger, and grief for his friend rolled off of him. His face was wet. When had it started to rain? Had he caused it? He should have been able to stop this from happening. Thunder and lightning crackled across the sky reacting to his emotions. 

_ Stop! Stop this!  _ He thought furiously. He needed to get himself in check, Arthur still needed him. But it was too late. The magic was pouring from him now and lightning crackled around him as he went to his knees.  _ You can do this. Just stop the rain. Get it together, Merlin! _ He tried reigning his magic back in and felt the rain lessen. The thunder kept on as well as the lightning. He couldn’t get it to stop.  _ Arthur needs you, Merlin. _ That was strange. He hadn’t thought that, but the thought felt familiar. He got back up to his feet and turned to head back into the castle. When he turned around, Gaius was standing there waiting for him. Ah, Gaius. He must have been thinking that. He went to his mentor and they walked the corridors until they reached Uther’s room. Word had spread fast that there had been an attack on the King and his father was grievously wounded. Aggravaine was in the room with Arthur when they walked in. Merlin stayed back by the door while Gaius went to check on Uther and give him some medicine. 

“Is there nothing you can do?” Arthur asked softly. 

“I’m afraid not, Sire. The blade has touched his heart.” Gaius said solemnly. 

“I can’t watch him die, Gaius!” Arthur was up now. “Uncle, could you give us the room?” Aggravaine nods and exits the chambers. “Magic can save him. I need him to live.” Arthur says looking at Gaius and then at Merlin who is standing at the door. His eyes wide realizing what it is Arthur is asking. “Please. I can’t lose him.” He adds softly.

“Let me see what we can come up with. Give me an hour.” Gaius says and grabs Merlin by the arm pulling him down the corridors until they are in the physician’s chambers. No one had noticed Aggravaine riding out of the citadel at a high speed. 

Merlin walked in the familiar room in a daze. His chest felt tight. Was Arthur really asking him to heal Uther? With magic? No. No, he wouldn’t do that. Knowing how scared he had been of the man, surely Arthur wasn’t asking him this. He went to his room feeling the panic rising and not wanting to disrupt any medicines Gaius had been working on. As soon as he closed his door, he stood between his bed and the window and let his panic overwhelm him. He needed to get this out so he could move forward. He felt as if he was drowning again. He couldn’t catch his breath. He knew he had caused a whirlwind to form around himself, he just hoped it left Gaius’ things untouched. Worry was eating at him. If he failed, Arthur would surely hate him. Could he really risk that? The thought of Arthur hating him caused the wind around him to rumble like he was in the eye of a storm. He had his head in his hands and was shaking some due to the emotional stress he was putting on himself. A small sob escaped him. Suddenly he was pulled into a tight, comforting hug. He didn’t even care who it was, he let the sobbing take over for a minute. He was finally able to catch his breath again and noticed his whirlwind had dissipated. He pulled back to see who had brought him back. It was Arthur. 

“I’m…I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to react like that.” Merlin mumbled.

“I understand. I know what I’m asking of you. I know it is not an easy decision. I need you to know that no matter what happens, it will not change things between us. You are my little brother. All I’m asking you to do is try. Gaius says he’s dying. I understand that. But I NEED you, Merlin. I need you to try and save him. He’s the only parent I have left. I know you understand. More than anyone.” Merlin just nods. He understands all too well. 

“I will try. But, please, I don’t want this to change things between us. If I can’t save him…I can’t lose you in the process.” Merlin whispers.

“You won’t. This will not change things.” Arthur says looking in his eyes, their foreheads were touching. Being this close to Arthur helped Merlin relax. This was his best friend. His brother.

“Ok.” Merlin nodded. Then let’s go try and save your father.” The pair walk out through the main physician chambers and head to Uther’s room, Gaius following behind. They walked over and each stood on either side of the bed watching as Gaius checked him over. He had a grave look on his face. 

“I want you to know, Sire, if you did nothing, your father would be gone within the hour.”

Arthur nodded trying to hide the tears in his eyes. “Please Merlin, I just need you to try.” His voice cracked and he wiped his face, not looking up from his father’s face. Merlin knew he had to try. He just hoped he hadn’t expended too much energy earlier. His hands shook slightly as he reached out and placed them over the bandaged wound. He closed his eyes and felt his magic stir. Something felt…off. But he couldn’t figure out where it was coming from. He recited words from one of the healing spells he had learned. It was powerful and he knew it should heal the dying man. When he was done he backed up, nearly falling over after all the magic he had used throughout the night threatened to overwhelm him. Uther took in a breath and opened his eyes looking at his son. 

“Arthur?” he said weakly. But something was wrong. Merlin felt his healing spell being pulled away and he collapsed to the floor just as Uther gasped again and then lay still not breathing. Merlin didn’t know what happened, and darkness took him before he could figure it out. 

Arthur couldn’t move. His father had woken up. He looked like he was healed. But then Merlin collapsed and his father let out a groan and lay still. He was gone. He thought surely magic could heal him. And it looked like it had. So what happened? What went wrong? He fell to his knees by his father’s side and just stayed there staring at his still form. This was not how his birthday was supposed to end. He’d now lost both his parents on his birthday. He heard someone calling his name but he couldn’t respond. He just reached out and closed his father’s eyes as the tears flooded down his face. Some servants entered and began to prepare his father for his final resting. Arthur was moving very slowly and once his father had been prepared he followed. When he was laid out on the cairn, Arthur went to him and kneeled next to it. The room was shut and he was alone. 

The first thing Merlin felt was a deep ache in his head. He reached up to rub his temples hoping to alleviate some of the pain. 

“Here, drink this.” A familiar voice said. He couldn’t even open his eyes. He reached out and, with some help, grabbed the vial and drank. The ache in his head started to go away, even if only slightly. 

“What happened?” He asked, voice rough.

“What do you remember?”

“I tried to heal Uther. Something felt off, but I didn’t know what it was. It was working. I felt it working. But something ripped my spell away. It ripped the healing away. It was so dark.”

“It seems someone knew that Arthur intended to use magic to heal Uther. I found a pendant on Uther’s neck that was designed to reverse any spell cast on the wearer.”

“Morgana.” Merlin whispered. 

“Perhaps. But she couldn’t have gotten in the castle. This may be her work, but she had help.” Gaius paused. “Arthur is sitting with his father. He is going to need you these coming days.”

Merlin nodded and sat up slowly opening his eyes. “I need to go to him. He can’t feel as if he’s alone.” He got up and walked the corridor to where he knew his King was sitting with his father. He leaned against the wall and sat there. He hadn’t even realized it was morning when the doors opened, and his King came out. 

“Merlin? Have you been out here all night?”

“I didn’t want you to feel like you were alone.” Merlin and Arthur walked through the corridors back towards Arthur’s room. Merlin stopped by the kitchen and got Arthur’s breakfast on the way. When they got to his room, Merlin set the breakfast down and went about opening the curtains and picking laundry up off the floor. The bed was still made as it hadn’t been slept in. Merlin was so focused on trying to tidy up that when he felt a hand on his shoulder he dropped the clothes he had picked up. 

“Merlin. Stop, you’re making me tired. Come, sit down and eat with me. Please.” Arthur said. 

Merlin just stared at him. He decided to go for a light-hearted comeback. “Who are you, and what have you done with King Arthur?”

Arthur just smirked. “Hmm. Merlin, what have we said about you trying to be funny?”

“I shouldn’t.” They walked over to the table and sat down and had breakfast together. Neither one saying anything. Just glad for the company.


	9. Merlin being...Merlin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Merlin surprised the King, the Knights, and himself.

The next few weeks, Arthur had thrown himself in to his duties as King, fully. He never really seemed to smile anymore. Losing his father took its toll on him. When he trained, he was hyper focused. He only tested Merlin on his training that first week. After that, he put Leon in charge of testing him. The Knights continued patrols through the kingdom to ensure peace and take care of any bandits. After his second week of training and testing, Leon told him it was time to start with daggers. Eion was put in charge of that portion. Though Merlin didn’t know the Knight well, he figured this was a chance to remedy that since the Knight now knew a great deal about him. Gwaine accompanied him to each testing session, but was out on patrol a lot, so he missed most of the training sessions. Percival was definitely determined to make sure Merlin could take on most men with just his hands. 

Merlin was, quite frankly, exhausted. When he wasn't training he was maintaining his duties taking care of Arthur. And he was still apprenticed to Gaius. He was often sent to the lower town to check up on those who had various ailments and see how they were recovering or to treat them with a small medicine satchel Gaius had given him. The people were so used to seeing him, they often stopped him and chatted trying to get him to come for dinner some night, or join them for a drink. They sought him out for advice. It didn’t matter how big or small the issue, he would listen to their stories and give out what advice he could. Sometimes he would be so caught up assisting the people, he would miss fetching Arthur his dinner, and in turn, be late for his secret training. 

It had been a month now since Uther had died. Merlin knew Arthur was very busy, but he wanted to help ease the burden on his friend any way he could. Every couple of days he would meet up with one of the kitchen girls, Diana, and head down to the lower town. He did this once a week, though he told no one what he was doing. When they got to the lower town, he would, more or less, hold audiences. He would help fix things if he could, though he wasn’t great at it. Sometimes the person just needed an extra set of hands, which he would provide. Thanks to all his training he had more muscle, and he was making sure to put it to good use. Diana would often sit with him and watch him work. Sometimes she would return to the castle and try to make sure another servant took the King his dinner when she knew Merlin had been kept late. She didn’t have feelings for him, but he understood her. Her heart lay with her dear friend Adaline. They shared a small house together and would try to get Merlin to just stay for a few hours and have dinner with them. He would cave in sometimes as it was nice to talk to others openly about affections that weren’t always accepted. On the nights they convinced him to stay the children would crowd him before he could return to the castle insisting that he tell them a story and play with them. He would usher them over to a spot by the citadel walls and, very animatedly, tell them stories. The stories happened to be the adventures that he, the King, and the Knights of the Round Table went on. The children loved his stories and could be seen chasing each other through the streets with sticks pretending to be knights. He had been so caught up in the stories he was telling the children one evening, that he hadn’t noticed he was being watched. Gwen stayed back as far as she could hoping that Merlin didn’t see her. She had followed Merlin and Diana that day to the lower town to see what they were doing. She wondered if, perhaps, Merlin had a new love. To say she was shocked to see Merlin helping the merchants reinforce their stands, or the tavern owner put up a new sign, or even a few townspeople begging him to stay for dinner, was an understatement. She was determined to share this with Arthur. She wanted him to see how wonderful Merlin was. 

Arthur couldn’t understand why Merlin showed up late some evenings, or why a different servant brought his dinner some nights. He watched his friend hoping he would share, but he never did. He had started to notice that his weekly audiences with the townspeople were getting smaller and smaller. Arthur was wondering why, but didn’t think too much on it as it gave him more time to spend with Gwen. Or at least more time to daydream about her. When a knock came to his door, he was pleasantly surprised to see her standing there. 

“Guinevere. How are you?” He asked.

“Are you busy right now, Arthur?”

“Not at the moment no. Was wondering where Merlin had wandered off to actually. You haven’t seen him, have you?”

“Actually, I have. That’s why I’m here. I’d like to show you something. Care to go for a walk through the lower town?” Gwen asked blushing at how forward she was being. 

“A walk would be great.” He brightened at the idea of spending some time with her.

“You should put something on though, to hide who you are. Otherwise it will ruin the surprise.” She said. 

“Alright.” Arthur grabbed a cloak and pulled the hood over his face. It was approaching evening, but a walk before dinner sounded nice. As they walked he noticed that Gwen was walking a particular path, not just wandering. When they reached the end of a path, Gwen slowed and leaned around a house. 

“Now, just promise me you’ll be quiet. I don’t want you to startle him.” She said looking stern.

“Alright, I promise. I won’t say a word.”

“Good.” She then walked around the corner and stood to the back of a small crowd. Most were children, but there were some adults there as well. Standing in front of them all, waving his arms around, was Merlin. Arthur almost tripped. What was Merlin doing? Then shrieks from the little ones reached his ears and he focused on what was being said. Merlin was telling a story. It was the story of Arthur’s quest to get the trident from the Fisher King. He left out a lot of the details that Arthur had been told, but still made the story sound amazing. When we reached the end about how the Prince had retrieved the trident and made it home safely, the children cheered loudly and the adults all clapped as well. Someone brought out some ale, Arthur thought it was the tavern owner, and had everyone raise their cups. 

“To Merlin! Who has helped fix what is broken and bring joy to the little ones as well as us older folks.” Laughter went around the group and Merlin just blushed a deep red color, making Arthur smile. “If it weren’t for Merlin, I doubt many of us would know what our King has done for us. He has shown us that we are all lucky to have King Arthur and the Knights of the Round Table. Of course we, ourselves, are lucky as well, that we are able to steal Merlin away from time to time. I know I for one, and grateful you have taken time to help. Whether you are delivering remedies, or helping fix a broken cart, or telling stories, you always bring joy with you. Cheers, mate!” 

“Merlin!” Everyone shouts and drinks milling about and trying to get a chance to talk to the young man, who is almost as red as his shirt by now. Arthur was stunned. Merlin had been sneaking out fixing things and telling stories of their adventures together. Arthur felt himself getting a little jealous. Since the Isle of the Blessed he had been determined to spend time with his friend, but it never happened. There always seemed to be something going on that prevented the two from spending time together. He felt a hand on his elbow pulling him back towards the castle. He and Gwen walked in silence for a little while. 

“How long has he been doing this?” 

“I’m not sure. I only found out a few days ago when I followed one of the kitchen girls who walked with him down here. I thought maybe they were romantically involved, but instead he talked with the people. He answered questions, gave advice, and helped if someone needed an extra set of hands for something. He had dinner with the young woman and her companion that night. When he left, the children rushed him and wouldn’t let him leave until he told them a story. He told them the story of a tricky goblin that had gotten loose in the castle. The way he told it, even I couldn’t help but laugh. The people all really love him. I just wanted you to see a little bit of it.”

“I’m glad you did. I only wished we’d had some time to talk properly. A lot has happened since we got back from vanquishing the Dorocha and then my father…and we’ve not really spoken about anything of any importance. It’s… strange.” Was all Arthur could say. They bid each other good night at the castle steps and Arthur found himself walking to the Knights hall to see who was there. He knew there were a few patrols out, so not all of his trusted Knights were here, but he found he wanted to speak with them. When he got there he found Percival, Lancelot, and Elyan. 

“Sire, what brings you to this part of the castle?” Lancelot asks.

“Hmm. What indeed. Have any of you noticed anything about Merlin lately?” Arthur asks. 

“No, Sire. Other than he’s coming along nicely in his sword training and hand-to-hand. His, uh, knife throwing, definitely needs more work. He’s at least hitting the target now instead of sending the blades sailing past. Is something the matter?” Elyan looks at Arthur concerned.

“No. It’s nothing that is wrong. I found something out today about Merlin, and I want to show you all. So, whoever is here the day after tomorrow, meet me here just before evening meal. Bring cloaks so you can blend in. All I ask is that you trust me. It will be a…pleasant surprise.” Arthur said. 

“Very well. Gwaine and Leon will be back tomorrow afternoon, and Corbett should be back the next morning. Eoin is supposed to be working daggers with Merlin right now, so we’ll let him know when he gets back.” Lancelot says.

“What should we know about this venture?” Percival asks.

“I can tell you we’ll be going to the lower town, but staying within the walls of Camelot. And I can tell you it involves our little brother showing his kindness and putting the well-being of others above himself.” Arthur says smiling at the memory of an animated Merlin telling a story to children. 

“Very well. Oh, Arthur, are you going to be doing Merlin’s testing tomorrow since Leon is on patrol still, or would you want one of us to do it? It’s been a month since you have seen his progress, so you might be surprised.” Lancelot says.

“I’ll do it.” He says and turns to leave, but then remembers something from a few weeks past at his birthday feast. “One more thing, was my mind playing tricks on me during my birthday feast, or was Gwaine  _ flirting _ with Merlin?” He looked at the others and their faces gave it away. Hmm. Interesting. “Never mind. It’s all over your faces. Just, make sure Gwaine knows it can’t interfere with Merlin’s training, and that it can’t serve as a distraction when we’re out on patrol. Also, if Merlin at any point makes it clear he’s not ok with it, it ends. I plan to make a proper threat out of it when Gwaine gets back if necessary. Have a good night.” Arthur says to the stunned Knights and heads back to his chambers. As long as Merlin was happy, that’s all he cared about. They didn’t know that the last night before getting back to Camelot after the drinking game, Arthur had heard the conversation between the pair. 

*********

Merlin got up early knowing that he had another testing day today to see how far he’d come on the various skills that others were teaching him. As he headed down to the usual clearing he wondered if Lancelot and Percival were going to test him or who would end up doing it. Arthur had only tested him that first week and then, with everything that happened, he’d been very busy with his various King-ly duties. They hadn’t gotten to have that long talk they were meant to have yet either. Merlin found he was missing spending time with Arthur. They didn’t ride out with the patrols since the Isle of the Blessed incident and hadn’t even been hunting. Not that Merlin wanted to hunt, but he did enjoy being in nature with his friends. When he got to the clearing he knew he was early but he wanted to warm up a bit before jumping straight in to the test. He wasn’t great, but he was getting better each week. The Knights could all still beat him, but he was lasting longer and holding his ground better. He tripped over his own feet less. 

After he had warmed up, he found he was already sweating a lot. He hung his shirt up on a branch so as not to get it too dirty. He hadn’t had a chance to do his own laundry, so this was his last clean shirt. He decided to practice with his magic for a second and closed his eyes. He then reached out with his magic to see if he could tell who was coming and who would be testing him. There were four people exiting the castle heading towards the clearing where he waited. Merlin couldn’t help but grin. Seems like Arthur was going to test him this morning. Then he felt something else. Something he hadn’t felt in months. He turned to focus in the direction it was coming from. There. Merlin felt his chest tighten and the man he had nightmares about camped a few hours ride from where he was now. The man who had captured them when all his friends had wanted to do was give him a happy birthday. No. Why is he here? Why is he close? Merlin tried to reign his magic back in, but he was already panicking. He reached out hoping to connect his hand with the tree to steady himself, but missed and landed hard on his knees. He felt the breeze his magic had whipped up. The slaver. Balin, he had been called. Merlin reached up and touched the scar on his face. He tried, in vain, to steady his breathing. Suddenly he was retching on the ground. His fear had gripped him and he couldn’t shake it. He heard his name being called. There were hands on him pulling him up off the ground. 

“Breathe, Merlin, come on. Steady your breathing. Focus on me, focus on my breathing.” Arthur was telling him. Arthur. As long as Arthur was by him, he knew he’d be fine. 

Once his breathing was finally under control he said, “Sorry about that.”

“What happened? You haven’t had an episode in weeks.” Lancelot asked.

“If I tell you, you won’t want to stay here and test me, you’ll want blood.” He said so low it was almost a whisper.

“Merlin. We’ve talked about being dramatic, haven’t we? Tell us.” Arthur said.

“I wanted to come out and warm up a bit before testing. After I warmed up I decided to reach out with my magic and see if I could find out who would be testing me. I felt you lot leaving the castle but then I felt something else. Someone camped in the woods a few hours from Camelot.” He paused, not wanting to say the name. 

“And?” Percival encouraged.

“It was the slave trader. The one who…the one who did this.” He said touching his face. “Balin.” As soon as the name was out, he felt the anger roll off his friends. He thought he was going to be sick again saying the name. “Please, don’t get worked up, because if you all get worked up, then my magic is going to react again, and I’m not sure what will happen. He isn’t close enough you could reach him anytime soon. Maybe the patrol that’s supposed to be coming back today will run into him. Or something.” The others weren’t happy about this, but they knew he was right.

“Alright Merlin. So, after that little episode, do you think you can still show me what you’ve learned?” Arthur said, slightly concerned yet slightly daring his friend. Merlin caught the look in his eye and smiled.

“Well I’d hate to think I got you up early just so you could watch me have a panic episode.” Merlin said and gave a small mock bow.

“Well, then, if today goes well, then next week you’re going to start practicing what to do with two opponents. So, let’s see what you’ve picked up so far!” And with that Lancelot, Percival, Elyan, and Eion moved back from the duo as they started circling each other. Merlin held his own for quite a while, but he knew it was because Arthur was testing him to see what he had learned. They sparred for a quarter of an hour before Arthur had enough and disarmed him. “Not bad.” Arthur said and tossed his sword down removing his own shirt. “Come on, then!” They fought for a while. Merlin felt like he was holding his own and he was a little surprised at his own strength. After another half an hour, Arthur had him pinned to the ground, both out of breath. Arthur stood up and offered Merlin a hand, who refused it as politely as he could.

“Just give me a minute to, uh, collect myself.” Merlin said panting. The group laughed and after a minute they pulled Merlin to his feet. 

“Lance, Percival, you are doing a great job with Merlin. He’s doing better than some of the new Knight recruits. We have a little time left, care to show what you have learned about daggers?” Arthur asks.

Merlin just groans. “If it’s necessary…” 

“It absolutely is. Before, though, I have something that may help. Here, I brought a set of my throwing daggers for you to try.” Arthur said handing Merlin a box with a half dozen knives inside. 

“Are you sure?” Merlin eyed the blades greedily. 

“Yes, Merlin, I’m sure. You need a set, and I have more than I could ever use. Now, show me what you got.”

Merlin held the first in his hand for a minute feeling its weight. He then launches it at the target and somehow lands it dead center. He smiles then grabs the next one and lets it go. He manages to get all six blades in or right outside the center mark. Arthur just stares at him and then looks at the gathered Knights skeptically.

“You said he wasn’t very good.” Arthur said looking at Elyan.

“He wasn’t. He hasn’t thrown even close to like that these past weeks.” Eoin said in defense. 

“Hmm. Merlin, fetch the blades and go again.” Arthur instructed. Merlin went and pulled the blades loose then walked back to the others. 

“These feel different than what I’ve been practicing with. Almost like…they were made for me. They just feel…right.” Merlin said gazing at the blades in his hands. He then launched each of the blades at the target landing each right next to the other within the center mark. 

“Well, now that you have a set of blades that are apparently attuned to you, you will carry a minimum of two blades on you at all times. Am I clear?” Arthur said looking at Merlin trying to get his attention away from the blades. 

When Merlin finally looked at Arthur he blushed. “Of course. I think I can manage that.”

“Ok then.” Arthur smiles and grabs his shirt and sword, Merlin grabs his shirt as well, and the group heads back to the castle. Lancelot, Percival, Elyan, and Eoin are in a stunned silence. They had not seen someone throw blades so perfectly before. Not even Arthur. It was slightly unnerving. 

The day went by fairly quickly. Arthur kept Merlin busy with as many chores as he could think of. Honestly. First he scrubbed the floors, then he took the laundry, of course he added his to this as he needed to do laundry anyway, then he polished the shields in the armory. By the time he was done, his arms felt like they would fall off. He stumbled back to his room and collapsed on his bed. Before he fell asleep he pulled out the case of throwing knives that Arthur had given him. They were stunning. When he threw them, they felt like an extension of himself. It was incredible. He had carried two with him all day, but he hadn’t even felt them. As he drifted off to sleep he knew he would carry them all on his person at all times. They just felt right. 

The next morning Merlin headed to the kitchens to grab Arthur’s breakfast. While he waited he talked with Diana who had come in early. 

“Everyone is excited to see you this evening. Do you have a new story to tell?” She asked while she washed some pans.

“Hmm. Maybe. Tell me, would you prefer an adventure, a romance, or a comedy?” Merlin asks leaning in.

“Oh! You know they all love a good adventure. The last one you told about the Fisher King was wonderful! The kids have been running around arguing over who got to be Courage, Strength, and Magic.” She said smiling.

“Ok, I think I have one in mind. Does anyone need anything when I come down, or is tonight just for the story?” He asks. 

“Well, I hate to ask, but Ada and I could use your help. Part of the roof started coming down last night and we can’t seem to get it fixed. It’s just supposed to be the story tonight, but, we would be really grateful if you could help us. She’s great with tools, but I am not.” Diana says blushing a little.

“Ok, well how about I go by early afternoon, after the council meeting to check it out and see what I can do?”

“That would be wonderful. Thank you so much, Merlin! I can’t tell you what your friendship has meant to us, Ada and I, I mean. You were the first one to accept us and we can’t thank you enough. If there is ever anything you need, you let us know.” She said and then hugged him. 

“You don’t have to thank me. Really. I better go, don’t want the King in a bad mood because he’s hungry.” He grabs the tray and heads off to start his day of training with the Knights, then an unfortunate amount of meetings. 

When he and Arthur get down to the training grounds, they see that all of the Round Table have made it back from their patrols. Naturally, Gwaine comes up and hugs Merlin in front of everyone. Arthur just rolls his eyes. He had set up targets and was having them practice throwing daggers. He found himself watching his Knights and couldn’t figure out what was off. They threw the blades well enough, their form was correct, but it just seemed like they were trying too hard. Arthur halted the Knights.

“Merlin. Come here.” He had an idea and wanted to see some of the reactions. As Merlin walked over he looked at him raising an eyebrow. “You have your blades on you?” He asks him.

“Yes...” Merlin said hesitantly, his eyes were questioning. 

“Good. Now, I want you to show these Knights how to throw a blade correctly.” Arthur says and grins. 

“You want me to what?” Merlin asks.

“Show them. I can’t put my finger on it, there’s just something off about how they are throwing. I want them to watch you and do as you do. Go on, then.” The Knights were all waiting. The group who had seen Merlin throw before had knowing smiles. He walked over to the targets and started pulling the blades out from where he had hidden them. This caused some shocked expressions. No one had expected him to have a half dozen blades hidden on him. Looking far more graceful than he had the right to, he launched each blade at the targets and landed all six in the center of six different targets. Some of the Knights just dropped their weapons and stared. Merlin went to retrieve the blades and came back. “Again.” Arthur told him. So again he launched all six blades. This time all at one target. They were barely a finger width apart. Gwaine’s jaw had dropped and he just stared. Merlin retrieved the blades again and looked to Arthur. “Again. This time go a little slower so they can see your form. Merlin took his jacket off and tossed it to the side. 

“Same target or different targets?” He asked looking at Arthur. 

“Different targets.” At that he launched each blade slowly and carefully. Each rolling end over end and embedding themselves in the center of each target. “Thank you Merlin. Now, you lot, see if you can do even half of that. Each of you must land three blades in the center of your target before you can leave.” Merlin had put all of the blades back quickly so Arthur hadn’t even seen where he was hiding them. He grabbed his jacket and then came to stand next to his King. 

“A little heads up next time would be nice, clot-pole.” Merlin said as he reached Arthur who saw his friend blushing furiously. 

“But then I would miss the surprise on everyone’s faces. Including Gwaine who I don’t think has recovered yet. Looks like his jaw is still on the ground.” They watched as the Knights worked trying to land their blades. Eoin landed his fairly quickly and then moved on to help some of the others. Lancelot, Leon, Elyan and Corbett were next to make their marks. Gwaine seemed a little flustered and was having trouble on his last blade when Lancelot came over to talk to him. 

“Sorry we didn’t get a chance to warn you. It was a shock for us too. When Arthur came to do the testing for Merlin yesterday, he gave him a set of throwing knives. And he did what you just saw him do. Hit every target dead center.”

“I haven’t had any time to talk to him since I got back so it’s not anyone’s fault. It was… very attractive though. He looked very graceful and powerful all at the same time. I’m intrigued.” Gwaine said.

“I’m sure you are.” Lancelot chuckled. “By the way, this evening, Arthur needs us for something. Said it has to do with Merlin. Have to have a disguise though, so bring a cloak and cover your head.” 

Gwaine looked at Lancelot. “Any idea what it’s about?” He asked.

“None. The King didn’t seem upset. He was, almost proud, actually. He said it had to do with Merlin being kind and putting others needs above his own.”

“That’s not surprising.” Gwaine said and launched his last dagger hitting the center of his target finally, “I’ll make sure I’m ready.” 

Arthur had left Leon in charge of the rest of training while he, attended by Merlin, went to the many council meetings scheduled for the afternoon. After several hours, Merlin excused himself. It was a little over an hour until it would be dinner time, but Arthur decided to start rounding the others up. He got his less King-ly clothes and a cloak and headed to grab the Knights. When he got there he saw the others sitting around waiting.

“So can you tell us anything about what we’re going to do?” Gwaine asks.

“I can tell you it involves Merlin, and I can tell you you’ll be pleasantly surprised.” Arthur said. “Now, come on.” And with that he left the room. The Knights were right behind him as he made his way through the citadel and to the lower town. When they got close enough, Arthur stopped them, much like Gwen had done with him. “Whatever you do, try to keep quiet. I don’t want to draw attention. Just, watch, and listen.” 

They came around the corner then and were at the back of a crowd again. At the front a young woman who worked in the palace kitchens came out and the crowd cheered. She just smiled at them all. “Is everyone ready for another adventure!?” She asks. More cheers. “Ok, Merlin come up here and tell these lovely folk a story!” Merlin came up and hugged her before turning around to face everyone, smiling brightly. 

“I was asked for an adventure tonight, so I hope that’s ok.” The crowd cheered. “Alright calm down, you don’t want to draw too much attention.” He chuckled. Kids were huddled up front sitting down and anxiously watching his every move. The tale he told was similar to that of when Morgana’s immortal army took over Camelot. There was a sad King, an angry Princess, and a brave Prince who only wanted to do the best he could for his people. But he needed help. With the help of his servant he made some new friends and Knighted common men. These men were the first Knights of the Round Table. One of the Knights knew his friend, the servant, was up to something sneaky and volunteered to help him while the others were going to try to rescue the sad King. He told of how they fought their way through an Army that wouldn’t die. How scary it was. Merlin’s face was so expressive, Arthur was fascinated and could not look away. He’d not heard this story before, though he knew how it played out. Merlin went on saying how the servant and the Knight raced to destroy the source of the soldiers’ power. They fought through many men, the Knight was injured! The servant was almost to the artifact when a powerful force threw him against a wall! The angry Princess’ half-sister had come in and planned to use her dark magic to stop them. But she was thwarted, and was blasted back herself by another who came in to protect the servant with their magic. He ran forward and destroyed the source of the Army’s power. As soon as it was destroyed, the Soldiers all disappeared! But the angry Princess had seen her injured sister and screamed using her magic to try to bury the servant and the Knight and the good magic user. They managed to escape and were able to recover from their injuries. The brave Prince had saved the sad King, but he was not the same. The angry Princess had broken his heart and he felt lost. The brave Prince had to take control and protect his people. With his Knights of the Round Table they brought peace to the land. And if you’re very lucky, you can see the Knights ride through protecting them all from danger. 

When Merlin finally finished his tale, the crowd went crazy cheering and the kids were jumping up and down and Merlin ended up on the ground under them. They were all laughing and cheering. A few people came over and pulled the kids off of Merlin and helped him up. Once again the tavern owner brought out drinks and passed them around. And held up his cup.

“Once again we are shown how wonderful our King and his Knights of the Round Table are! Though I must say, I think the servant needs more credit than he was given.” At this the man put his arm around Merlin who just blushed and smiled at them. “Another great tale. Thank you Merlin, for sharing these adventures with us. To Merlin!” 

“Merlin!” Everyone shouts toasting their drinks in the air. Merlin just beams and takes his drink smiling with all the towns-people around him. Arthur then looks over at the Knights and motions them to head back to the castle. They walk on in silence for a little while, but Gwaine was never one to keep quiet. 

“Well, that was definitely unexpected.” 

“How much of that story do you think was true?” Corbett asked.

“Most of it was, actually.” Lancelot said. 

“You! You knew back then, about him, and you went off with him to confront Morgause and Morgana to destroy their forces!” Arthur exclaimed pointing at Lancelot. 

“I knew he was planning something, and I knew he would never put any one in harm’s way if he could help it. He told me of his plan to empty the cup of life of the blood it contained, so I told him I’d get him there.” Lancelot said.

“How often does he do this?” Elyan asked.

“As far as Guinevere and I can guess, every few days. There’s more that he’s doing for the people than we know, but we can’t just tail him everywhere. As long as he isn’t exhausting himself too much and he gets his work done, I see nothing wrong with it.” Arthur said. “When Gwen followed him down here before she said people were seeking him out to help with odd jobs they needed an extra set of hands for. He was down here a lot anyway delivering remedies and helping the sick, so they already knew who he was. They asked for advice and invited him to dine with them. The children obviously became very fond of him because of his storytelling. Once he’s done helping with whatever job he’s doing, he stays and tells some tale or another that’s based on either a quest or something that happened since he’s been in Camelot.”

“Well, I can’t wait to hear the next story. He made us sound amazing.” Gwaine said.

“He played a huge part in Morgana not succeeding, and he didn’t even make himself out to be the hero.” Leon said thoughtfully. They walked on until they were at the steps of the castle. 

“Before I forget, we will be mounting a patrol first thing tomorrow morning. When we went out to do Merlin’s testing this morning he was having a panic episode. He had reached out with his magic and found someone within a few hours of Camelot that I think we would all like to take turns punishing.” Arthur said looking at the Knights. “The slaver, Balin. The one who,” Arthur paused he could hardly say it, “the one who kidnapped us and hurt him. If he is back, then he is hunting Merlin. He was too interested in him last time. I know we’ve been training him, but I think Merlin is still very much afraid of him.” Some of the Knights had actually growled at the mention of the man who hurt Merlin. 

“I’m in.” Gwaine said.

“We all are.” Arthur said as he put his hand on Gwaine’s shoulder. “If we all go, though, he will be with us. So, we will be going in two groups. I will take Merlin, Gwaine, Lancelot, and Corbett and tell Merlin that we are going on a hunt. The rest of you will take another path and search a few hours out before meeting up with us. You’ll know where to go, I’ll have Merlin contact you somehow so you know where we are.” 

“It’s a sound plan. There might be a problem though.” Lancelot says.

“What’s that?” Arthur asks. Lancelot just points behind Arthur and Merlin is standing there watching them. 

“So. You plan to go take revenge without telling me?” Merlin says.

“Well we can’t very well do that now can we? And since when did you walk so quietly?” Arthur asks. 

“I know you lot were trying to hide in the back of that crowd down there. So, when I saw you leave, I followed. You are all terrible at hiding who you are. Though I don’t think anyone else there realized who you were.” He replied. “Listen, if this man is really,  _ hunting _ me, as you say, then there’s not going to be anywhere I can hide. And I don’t want to hide. I just…don’t want to be afraid anymore. If you want to go on a hunt tomorrow then let’s go hunt, if not, we can just go out on a patrol and see what we come across. Your plan to split in two groups is a good one. I’ll have the provisions ready by morning. But for now, before you can ask any more questions, about anything, I think I’m going to turn-in. See you in the morning.”  _ I want to talk to you. Come by when you can separate from everyone and try not to look so eager about it _ . Merlin chuckled at the end after sending the message to Gwaine. He knew the other man got it when he grinned.

After Merlin left, Arthur turned to the group and caught the grin on Gwaine’s face. He knew Merlin must have said something to him in his mind that he hadn’t wanted anyone else to hear. 

“So will tomorrow be an actual hunt or patrol?” Arthur asked the group.

“Why not both?” Percival said. “We could take a few days and hunt for a day and then patrol a day.”

“That’s not a bad idea. Let’s plan for three days then. Oh, and Gwaine?” Arthur said singling his friend out. 

“Yes, Princess?”

“Tell Merlin that he doesn’t have any reason to hide who he is. But, if you distract him, or let him distract you while we are patrolling, that will be the end of it.” Arthur said, looking Gwaine in the eyes. The other man just stared at him for a minute before regaining his composure. The other Knights just snickered at this. 

“The only one who ever distracts Merlin when we’re out on patrol is you, princess. I’ll pass along the message though. Hopefully he relaxes a little more around you now.” Gwaine said and headed towards the castle leaving the group behind. He had no idea how Arthur knew about Merlin, he could only guess. 

“Have you had luck in getting some chainmail together for Merlin?” Arthur asked Elyan.

“It’s going to be finished end of next week. If you want him to have something for this trip, he’ll be borrowing or using something that isn’t made for him.” Elyan replied. 

“Hmm. Ok. He will not be without one of us during this trip. He has made a lot of progress with the sword and hand-to-hand combat over the past month, but he is still not the caliber I want him to be at. It would probably be best if he didn’t use any of his abilities on the patrol in case we encounter this Balin. It wouldn’t do us any good to have a storm pop up because he got near enough to us for Merlin to sense him. While we’re out, I still want him training in the evenings. We’ll switch up who’s doing what. I’ll do the sword and…Lance and Corbett one of you can take hand-to-hand for a night. We’ll leave at first light, so get some rest.” Arthur said and headed back to his chambers. 

*********

Merlin was pacing in the physicians chambers. Gaius was out at a small village dealing with a sweating sickness so Merlin was left alone with his thoughts. He knew the others would eventually find out about him spending time in the lower town, he just hoped it would have been later. While he waited for Gwaine to show up he decided to clear his mind and focus on the things in the room. He closed his eyes and opened his senses. He started with the plants and ordered them in the cupboard, he put the books back up on the shelf that he had been reading earlier, and he was going to scrub the floors when he was startled by a hand touching his arm. He let out an involuntary yelp and jumped. When he turned, he realized it was just Gwaine and he laughed at his loss of focus. 

“Sorry to startle you there, Merls.” Gwaine said, smiling at him. 

“It’s ok, I was a little anxious so I decided to do some chores to ease my mind a bit. I guess I was, erm, hyper-focused and didn’t hear you come in.”

“So, you want to tell me how you learned to throw daggers expertly when I was only gone for a few days?”

“Erm. I don’t think I can really explain it.” Merlin said blushing a bit and rubbing his neck. “I wasn’t doing very well with the practice daggers that Eoin had been training me with. They just didn’t feel right, or balanced. When Arthur came out to do the testing he gave me a set. When I held one, it felt so…I don’t know. It just felt  _ right _ , you know? Like it was an extension of myself. I’ve carried them on me since he gave them to me. Though I might need to go buy a new belt or something.”

“I’m glad. Just another of the talents you have that astounded everyone.” Gwaine chuckled at this and sat down by the table. “Merls, I need to let you in on something.” Merlin just tilted his head. “It seems that the King knows, uh, about somethings you had not wanted him to know yet. I have my suspicions, but if I had to guess, I’d say he listened in to our talk that last night in the woods after the Isle of the Blessed. He knows that I was flirting and he doesn’t seem to care.”

Merlin had to sit down. “He…knows about me?” he said quietly.

“Merlin, relax. He said not to let it distract us on patrols, otherwise he doesn’t care.” Gwaine told him, putting his arm around him and smiling.

“ _ You _ are going to get us in trouble.” Merlin said jokingly. “I didn’t tell you my secret so you could make moves on me.” He said, smiling back, trying to keep from blushing. 

“Oh, come on! I’m not asking for anything crazy. I just want to spend some time with you. See what happens. You’re my best friend and I don’t want to lose that. Worst thing that can happen is you end up falling for my charm or we stay friends. I can handle both those. I could never  _ not _ be friends with you Merlin.”

“Alright. I suppose you have a point.” Merlin said, turning a light shade of pink. Merlin got up and stretched, his shirt raising up and showing a hint of skin. It had been a long day and he needed sleep if he was going to be out on patrol for a few days. “I’m going to turn in. You should too.” Merlin said, pulling the other man to his feet and pushing him towards the door. When they got to the door though, Gwaine spun around the pinned Merlin to the wall. Merlin was a little taller than Gwaine, but he didn’t seem to care. 

“One thing, and then I’ll go.” Gwaine said. Merlin was bright red by now. He hadn’t been this close with someone in a long while. Gwaine put his hand on Merlin’s neck and pulled him in until their lips met. Gwaine hadn’t been sure how Merlin would react, but he wanted to see what would happen. It felt like electricity had shot through him. When Merlin didn’t resist, he took that to mean he didn’t mind. Merlin wasn’t sure what came over him but he was suddenly leaning in pulling the other man against him by his shirt. It was a nice moment. When they parted they just leaned their foreheads together. “Goodnight, Merlin.” 

And then Merlin was alone in the room feeling all kinds of warm. When he realized he was glowing he tried to relax, but it wouldn’t go away. Oh well, guess he would just go to sleep and hope it was gone by morning. What had he gotten himself into? He liked Gwaine as a friend. But was it so wrong to enjoy having someone he could be close with? He could not let this distract him. Arthur would kill him if he did. Or at least never let him hear the end of it. On that happy note he went to bed determined to be rested by morning for this hunt/patrol. 


	10. More Secrets Revealed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Merlin and Gwaine have a moment, Aithusa as a hat, overprotective older brother Arthur and supportive friends.

His dreams had other ideas though. Instead of being able to have pleasant dreams of spending time with his friends, or even Gwaine, he had a nightmare. They were out on patrol and were attacked by bandits. But then they weren’t bandits anymore, they were Morgana’s men, led by Balin. They were outnumbered. Merlin saw an opening to protect his friends and he took it. He reached out with his mind to say sorry and then, using his magic, threw them in the river they were backed up against. Once they were safely downstream he turned to face the man who had tormented him. He was terrified, but at least his brothers were safe. As Balin approached him he became frozen in place. Morgana appeared behind him and lashed those infernal enchanted chains around him so he couldn’t move. He was carried to a nearby structure that was once a great house. It was long since abandoned. Not surprisingly he was dragged to a room that had rings on the ceiling and the ground. Before he could react, the enchanted chains had wrapped his wrists and ankles to the rings. He couldn’t move. And since the chains were enchanted, he couldn’t break them. He tensed when a hand traced its way up his back and grabbed a handful of hair forcing his head back. 

“You know, I never put much thought to you Merlin. You were always just a pest that got in my way. When Balin approached me and requested my assistance in  _ retrieving _ you, I saw it as an opportunity. With you out of the way, my dear brother will be unable to concentrate. I will take Camelot’s throne. It is rightfully mine, after all.” Morgana said pressing her mouth to his ear to ensure he was listening. “He’s all yours.” She let go of his hair and Merlin heard her steps retreating the way they had come. Then the man he had hoped to never see again was in front of him. He tried to contain his fear, but he knew the man saw it. He relished in it. That made him all the more fearful. His hands were chained directly above his head while his ankles and feet were chained to the ground. He found himself pulling, uselessly, against his bonds. The man let out a cruel laugh seeing the struggle. 

“I’ve been waiting patiently to get to you. It has not been easy. It seems it is not just the King and the Knights that care for you. I witnessed the towns-people cheer for you as if you were famous. Well, I can assure you, that you will not be part of that again.” He sneered and pulled out a knife and cut through Merlin’s shirt leaving his bare skin exposed. Merlin winced as a dagger was drug across his shoulder blades. He felt blood dripping down his back and soaking in the band of his pants. This wasn’t real. He knew this wasn’t real. It was just a bad dream. He needed to wake up.  _ Come on, Merlin! Wake up! _ The man then stepped back and tossed the dagger at him. Without thinking the dagger stopped just before it could pierce him as his magic finally reacted. Balin stared at him with renewed interest. He closed the gap between them. “It would appear you have a secret, Merlin. I wonder how much your gift can protect you from…” The man looked too anxious to find out. A table had appeared against the wall in front of Merlin that had an assortment of tools and weapons on it. He renewed his efforts to pull free causing his wrists to bleed as the chain tightened each time he struggled. He let out a yell and sent the man flying backwards, but the yell had sent his magic out and the building started to come down on top of him. He was too trapped by the chains to be able to pull free and he was panicking at the thought of being buried alive with no one knowing where he was or how to find him. The shaking was intense and he found he was screaming. Usually if he screamed enough he could wake himself up.

“MERLIN!” A familiar voice shouted and he bolted up falling out of bed and backing up against the cold stone wall. When he looked up he found Arthur and most of the Knights in his room. 

“Sorry. I’m sorry.” Merlin said softly and put his head in his hands trying to shake the nightmare and breathe. His heart felt like it was going to beat out of his chest. 

“Merlin, the whole castle was shaking. What happened?” Arthur asked. 

“N-n-...n-nightmare.” Was all he could get out as he was still struggling to get his heart to stop racing. The others crowded in the small room now and waited for him to share. He just wrapped his arms around his body and shivered. When Arthur saw the shiver he guided Merlin up and back to the bed to at least sit down somewhere warm. 

“What was it about?” Percival asked. Merlin got a good look at everyone. They were in their night clothes still and it was still dark out. 

“It was… it was about Balin and Morgana. Working together.” He shuddered at the thought. He recounted the nightmare and the others just listened. 

“That won’t happen, Merlin.” Lancelot looked at him. 

“You can’t promise that, Lance.” Merlin said softly looking down at his knees. “None of you can. It felt so… real.”

“Try to get some more rest. We have a few more hours before we leave, and you won’t do anyone any good if you’re exhausted.” Arthur said standing up to leave and herding the others out. He made eye contact with Gwaine, and he nodded in understanding. Merlin didn’t look up as they left. He rubbed his hands at his temples trying to get the feelings and images out of his mind. He felt someone sit on the bed next to him and looked up to see Gwaine. 

“I’ll stay, if you want, to make sure you don’t have any more nightmares.” 

“That would be nice. Did I really cause the whole castle to shake?”

“Aye. Woke us all up from a dead sleep. We came out to check what was going on and saw Arthur running down the hall and then we heard a scream. We knew something must have happened. I’m glad Arthur was able to wake you when he did.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry. It’s not your fault a crazed lunatic has taken a liking to you.” He bumped the younger man’s shoulder and got him to smile a little. 

“You mean other than yourself?” He asked. Gwaine feigned shock and caused Merlin to laugh. “Thanks Gwaine. I know I shouldn’t be afraid, but I can’t shake it. I was hoping all this training would help me feel stronger and less afraid. Having sensed him so close though, really threw me.”

“Get some sleep, Merls. I’ll be here when you wake up. If you want me to be.” Gwaine said leaning back against the wall and putting his feet up on the small bed.

“Yeah, I think that might help.” Merlin then pulled his blankets up and leaned against Gwaine feeling the comfort of having someone close by. 

He didn’t dream the rest of the night. When he woke up he had managed to wrap his arms around the others waist using him as a sort of pillow. Feeling slightly embarrassed, he pulled his arms back carefully not to wake his friend and got out of bed to get ready for the day and the upcoming trip. He had just pulled his nightshirt off and grabbed his new shirt when he heard a whistle from behind him. Gwaine was winking at him and eyeing him up and down. 

“Hey, stop that!” Merlin told him.

“Stop what?” He asked innocently. 

“You know what.” He said and tried to pull his shirt on quickly. Unfortunately he wasn’t quick enough as Gwaine had grabbed it and thrown it on the bed. “Hey! I need to get dressed. I still have to go by the kitchen to pick up some food, and get the horses ready. I don’t have time…” he trailed off as Gwaine had backed him up to the stairs leading out of his room and to the main physician’s chambers. Merlin tripped and tumbled back, but had grabbed out for Gwaine while he was falling so instead of landing on the floor by himself, Gwaine landed on top of him. His face flushed bright red. Gwaine just grinned at him.

“Merlin, if you wanted to make a move you didn’t have to pull me to the floor.” Gwaine saw the flush on Merlin’s face and thought it was adorable. 

“Um. Er. We, uh, we need,” he cleared his throat, “we need to get ready to go.”

“If that was the case why’d you pull me down here then?” Gwaine was enjoying flustering his friend. Where he was was directly above Merlin’s face. He leaned in closer feeling the other’s breath catch. “Before I get up, one last thing”. He pressed his lips to Merlin’s. He felt Merlin seemingly melt underneath him. He liked kissing Merlin. Merlin didn’t hold back this time and grabbed the back of Gwaine’s neck and put his other hand on his back. They stayed that way for several minutes until there was a loud knock at the door, breaking them out of the moment. The door was unceremoniously swung wide open and the Knights stood there watching the pair on the floor with amusement in their eyes. 

“Come on lover boys, we’ve got a hunt to go on. No time for this.” Lancelot said, winking at them. Merlin was hiding his face in his hands. 

“You really have terrible timing.” Gwaine said, obviously annoyed. He got up and pulled Merlin up, who promptly hurried back to his room shutting the door to get dressed. Gwaine walked to the door and headed out to get his stuff from his room and get ready to go. 

“Do we need to have a talk about your intentions with Merlin?” Lancelot asked, trying to hide his smile.

“Ha. The way that boy kisses, you should be asking him what his intentions are.” Gwaine said in response. This caused everyone to bust out laughing. Before long they were all gathered on the steps where Merlin had the horses all brought up and packed. Once Arthur joined them they all mounted up and headed out. While they were riding out many of the towns-people stopped to wave and cheer as they exited the citadel. Merlin just smiled and waved to them all. The King and the Knights all waved as well. 

They stopped a few hours from Camelot and dismounted to set up a camp since the first day was going to be actual hunting. Merlin set about setting up the bed rolls, pans, a ring of rocks for the fire, and then moved on to watering the horses. 

“Hey, Merlin?” Corbett called.

“Yeah?”

“How about tonight you tell us a story like you do the people. Only, you know, actually give us the full story. Magic and all?”

“Er. Sure, ok. Do you have something in mind, or do you want me to just pick something?” Merlin asked.

“What do you think, something funny, or something exciting?” Corbett asked the others. 

“I vote adventure,” Percival said. 

“I agree,” said Leon and Elyan. 

“Alright, an adventure. Should give me time to pick one while you all hunt.” Merlin said. They grabbed their beaters and crossbows and headed into the trees to seek out their prey. They had gotten a couple pheasants, a few rabbits, and Merlin had gotten a snake with a dagger. It wasn’t intentional, it just startled him and he reacted by throwing the dagger. It was on a tree right next to Eoin like it was going to strike him. The others hadn’t even registered it happened, until Eoin pointed it out. 

“That was incredible!” Eoin shouted and the others came over. 

“What was?” Leon asked. Then he was directed to the dagger in the head of the somewhat large snake on the side of the tree. They all looked at Merlin, who knew his face and ears were bright red. He just walked up and grabbed the knife, cleaned it off on the ground and snuck it back to its hiding place. 

“You are just full of surprises aren’t you?” Gwaine asked. After this they went back to the campsite to clean their kills. Merlin got things together to cook, but Arthur pulled him away from that. 

“You are not getting out of your training because we are away from the castle” Arthur said. 

“Of course not. Wouldn’t dream of it.” Merlin responded sarcastically.

“Your sword training with me today. Then hand-to-hand. Grab a sword.” Merlin was handed a sword from Elyan and removed his jacket and walked over to Arthur. They started sparring with occasional stops of Arthur correcting a stance or footwork. Merlin was drenched in sweat by the time an hour had passed. He drank some water hoping to feel a little refreshed since he knew they expected him to train hand-to-hand next. Ugh. How had he got roped into this again? He pulled his shirt off to hang it on a branch so it could dry since he had sweat through it. Lancelot was working with Leon to do his hand-to-hand training. They showed him some new moves and he worked to master them. After another hour, he all but collapsed to the ground on his back panting for air. 

“Good job, Merlin. You’re doing really well.” Corbett said. He liked Corbett. Something about him reminded him of Percival. 

“Thanks. Did anyone see a creek or river or something? I could use a wash after all that.” Merlin said sitting up. 

“Why don’t we all go for a swim? I saw a river bank not too far.” Eoin suggested. 

“Swimming it is!” Arthur said. 

It was maybe a five minute walk to the bank. When they got there, the others quickly stripped off their shirts and trousers. Merlin tossed his boots and ran and jumped in, “Last one in has to clean Arthur’s socks!” He yelled. The others just laughed as he splashed near the middle and came back up for air grinning like a fool. There were several yells and an indignant, “Hey!” before they all splashed in around him. Merlin was already swimming circles around them. Laughing as they tried to catch him. Somehow Percival had caught him and threw him in the air causing a massive splash and more laughter when he came spluttering up for air. They lay out on the bank drying off and enjoying the last rays of sunshine from the day. When they got back to camp, Corbett and Merlin collaborated on a meal. Once they had their fill and dishes were cleaned and put away Merlin came and sat right next to the fire. 

“Alright you lot. So you wanted an adventure, right?” He asked. They all edged around the opposite side of the fire nodding in anticipation. “I’m going to throw in some stuff so you get the full effect. So don’t freak out. Also, please don’t judge me too harshly. You’ll see why.” And with that he launched into the story of the Knights of Medhir that had attacked Camelot while Arthur and Merlin were at Idirsholas. He used his magic to create the shapes of the Knights in the embers above the fire. The city sleeping when Arthur and Merlin returned and their desperate search for the King. Finding Morgana awake. Merlin thinking the reason she wasn’t sick was because of her magic. Then he showed himself and Arthur in the embers beginning to get sick while Morgana was still well. When Merlin got to the part where he had consulted the dragon he could almost hear Arthur stop breathing. Morgana was the source of the spell. To end the enchantment, the source of the spell had to die. He showed Arthur charging into the corridor to take on the enchanted Knights and Morgause while Merlin tricked Morgana and poisoned her to break the enchantment. Morgause threatened to kill him if he didn’t tell her the poison and Merlin said that Morgana would die with him then. The enchantment was lifted and Morgause used a powerful spell to take her and Morgana from the room just as everyone was waking, which Merlin showed in a swirl of the fire. He hadn’t realized he had cried until he was done. Anytime he had to remember betraying his once friend, it hurt. The silence that followed was deafening. Merlin got up and walked away knowing Arthur needed time to absorb. He walked back to the river and stood gazing as the moon reflected off the water. It was a lot to take in, so he hoped one day his friends could forgive him. 

**********

_ Emrys _ . His head shot up.  _ Emrys _ . He turned and followed the direction the voice was coming from.  _ Emrys _ . He arrived at a clearing and found himself in the presence of no less than 20 Druids. When he arrived they all bowed to him. He had been so focused on finding his way, he hadn’t noticed he had been followed by his friends. 

“Please, stand.” Merlin told them, feeling uncomfortable. 

“Emrys. Thank you for coming.” 

“Is something wrong? Why have you called me?” Merlin asked, trying to keep himself calm.

“A man has stolen something from us. A relic. A piece of a triskelion. He has also stolen a piece from Camelot. This relic serves as a key. It opens the Tomb of Ashkenar. The tomb is said to contain a dragon egg.” The Druid paused letting this sink in. 

Merlin gasped. “Are you sure?”

“Yes. He must not get it. You must get to the tomb first and protect the egg. You are the last Dragon Lord. It is your duty. You must hurry though. It will take you at least half a day to reach the tomb. The man, Borden, is nothing but a thief. He only cares for the coin a dragon egg can fetch him.”

“How do I get there?” Merlin said, determined to rescue the egg. 

“May I?” The man asks, stepping forward. Merlin nods. The man touches his forehead to Merlin’s. When he pulls back, Merlin’s eyes shine bright gold. 

“Thank you” he whispers. “I will do what I can to seek out the egg. I need your word, should you encounter the young dragon, that you will guide them and protect them.” 

“You have our word.” 

“Thank you. Again.” Merlin said. Before he could turn around again the Druids all bowed to him. He headed back to camp thoughts already running rampant in his mind. A dragon egg! A real dragon egg! He would need to make haste first thing in the morning. He wondered how he could convince the others he needed to go when he ran into a body and crashed to the forest floor in a tangle of limbs. 

“Ow.” Was all he could say as he tried to get up off of whoever he had collided with. He opened his eyes and saw he was laying on top of Eoin. “Sorry. Got lost in thought.” Merlin said, trying to stand up.

“Merlin, we have a few questions.” Arthur said from behind him. 

“Ok?”

“One, don’t you think it was stupid of you to walk off on your own when you know there is a madman out here looking for you? And two, why were those Druids bowing to you?” Arthur asked, his tone letting Merlin know how serious he was. 

“Erm. Yes, it was probably a bit stupid to walk off, but you looked like you needed some time to sort out what I told you. And the Druids, well, erm, that one is a bit more complicated.” Merlin said hoping he would drop it. One look in Arthur’s eyes though told him he wasn’t getting off that easy. He sighed. “They keep doing that anytime I’m around even though I tell them not to. They consider me their…leader. Of sorts. Because of the prophecy that you and I are bringing about, they consider me kind of like royalty. It’s rather annoying actually.” Merlin rubbed his neck. 

“Merlin, people don’t just bow down to royalty. They bow down to their Kings. So. Do you want to rephrase anything?” Arthur asked him. 

“What do you want me to say? They consider me their King even though it is something I never asked for. I wasn’t raised as a leader. I was raised a peasant, who became a servant for a Prince, who is destined to be the greatest King of legend. I didn’t want anyone knowing because the last thing I need is my friends treating me differently than they already do whether it’s because I have magic or whatever.” As Merlin said this he was already on the move back towards their camp. “Besides, I know Gaius told Lance how the Druids act around me.”

“It’s true. But knowing about it and seeing it are not the same.” Lancelot said. Merlin just rolled his eyes.

“Well since you were all obviously eavesdropping, what exactly did you hear?” Merlin asked them sitting down in front of the fire again and subconsciously making a bubble around them. 

“A dragon egg. And I take it you mean to release the creature?” Corbett asks. 

“I do.” Merlin said.

“Even after that dragon attacked Camelot?” Leon asked.

“It wasn’t his fault. He was angry and wanted revenge on Uther for what happened to him. He was the last of his kind. Uther had told my father that he meant to make peace with the last dragon. But then betrayed them both capturing the dragon and keeping him chained up beneath the castle for over 20 years and hunting my father.” Merlin explained. 

“That dragon was beneath the castle for more than 20 years? How did no one ever find it?” Arthur asked.

“I did. Gaius did. Usually only those with magic could find him. He gave me advice, though I probably should have ignored some of it.” Merlin told them.

“You’re a riddle Merlin.” Arthur said, laying back. 

“I’m sorry?” Merlin asks.

“A riddle. Sometimes I think I understand you, then you go and say something wise. It’s getting disconcerting.” Arthur said teasingly. Merlin laughed at this. And lay back himself gazing at the stars. 

“I’ve put up a shield so we should get some rest. I intend to chase after this Borden character tomorrow at first light. I’d appreciate the company if anyone wants to come along. I can be there and back before tomorrow evening.” Merlin said. “Better yet, you can have your two groups of patrols looking for the mad man while I go to the tomb. I’m only willing to take one of you, though. I can’t chance that the tomb won’t be booby trapped.” 

“I’ll go with you,” Gwaine said. “I’ve always wanted to see a dragon egg.” 

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” Elyan teased. “You sure you won’t get distracted?” This causes all the Knights to burst into uncontrollable laughter while Merlin turns bright red and Gwaine just winks at him. Merlin caught Arthur’s eye. 

“Is there something you care to share, Merlin?” Arthur asked innocently. 

“No, absolutely nothing, Sire. Goodnight.” He said and rolled over before he could ask anymore. This just caused another round of laughter. Lancelot reached over and ruffled the boy’s hair in a very older brother sort of fashion. 

*********

The morning came early as Merlin couldn’t sleep knowing what awaited him today. He had made breakfast almost as the sun was just coming over the horizon. The smell of food roused the others. While they ate, Merlin had packed up his things and had his horse ready to go by the time they were done and washing up. A hand grabbed his shoulder that he wasn’t prepared for and his magic shot a small tendril of lightning to the person who startled him. Groaning on the ground was Arthur. 

“I’m so sorry! I did not mean that! You startled me and, well, I’m a little on edge, I guess.” He said this all very quickly while helping the King to his feet and brushing him off. 

“It’s alright. I saw you were lost in thought, but wasn’t sure how to get your attention without shouting at you.” Arthur said. 

Merlin chuckled a little. “Did you need something?” 

“Not exactly. I wanted to tell you to be careful today. You need to be on alert. I know your concern is the egg, but you need to remember to listen to your surroundings. Be smart.” He paused and added, “Don’t let Gwaine distract you. And try not to distract him too much. You’re both going to need to pay attention.” Merlin felt his ears heat up. 

“Once we have the egg, we can meet you back here. If you are late, then we will have to come in search of you. Don’t try to tell me not to. It won’t work.” Merlin said. 

“Very well. Ride safe.” Arthur turned and took off with Percival and Eoin, while Leon, Lancelot, and Corbett took off in another direction, leaving Gwaine and Merlin to head off towards the egg. The journey took several hours and Merlin had trouble trying to keep up conversation. He tried to pay attention to their surroundings but he felt such a strong pull to get to the tomb that he had trouble thinking of anything else. 

“Merlin.” Gwaine said, coming up next to him.

“Hmm? Sorry.” 

“It’s alright. We’ll get there, you know that, right?” 

“Yeah, I know. I just feel this…  _ pull _ . Like I need to hurry. I can’t explain it.” He said. Gwaine just nodded. Merlin decided to try reaching out with his magic to see how much farther they had to go. He almost gasped as he found the tomb and was able to detect Borden just arriving. He spurred his horse on as fast as he could. Soon they were at the tomb and Merlin was tying up his horse and racing to get into the tomb. Borden had just disappeared inside when he dismounted. As Merlin rounded a corner inside he saw a man put the triskelion key in place and turn it opening a door. A gas was emitted in the corridor causing the man to collapse. Merlin chanted a spell and caused a wind to force the substance back and clear the corridor. As soon as Merlin got to the top of the stairs Gwaine had made it to the bottom. Merlin walked up into the open chamber and found a pedestal with an egg on it. It took all he had to not just rush forward to it. When we was in front of it, Borden came in claiming it was his. Gwaine tried to stay back as he knew Merlin could take care of himself. He was right when he saw Merlin thrust a hand out and the man flew across the tomb. Merlin didn’t think about the next part, he simply picked up the egg and ran to leave. The egg  _ had _ been booby trapped. As soon as Merlin had picked it up the tomb started collapsing. Gwaine grabbed him and pulled him through the corridors and ran out towards the trees where they left the horses. Turning around in time to see the tomb fully collapse in on itself. Merlin took the egg and put it in his pack amongst his extra clothes to protect it. The smile on his face was quite breathtaking if Gwaine was being honest with himself. 

“We better head back. Don’t want to be late and then the princess goes and sends the whole army out looking for us.” 

“Yeah, let’s go. Hey, Gwaine?”

“Yeah?”

“Thanks for coming with me.” Merlin said, smiling at him. 

“No problem. Though I think you owe me a drink for pulling you from a collapsing tomb, to say the least.” He said, winking.

Merlin rolled his eyes. “Alright. We’ll go out when we get back to celebrate or something.” He said.

“Sounds good to me.” The rest of the journey back was fairly uneventful. They’d managed to make it to the tomb and back without any trouble. Curious. Merlin only hoped that the others had similar luck. They were back sooner than they had expected they would be so they decided to use this time to work on some swordplay unique to Gwaine. Gwaine showed him a move several times and Merlin was starting to get it. It had been over an hour when he finally got the move and was able to disarm the other man. When it happened he just stood there shocked, like he couldn’t believe he did it. The sound of clapping brought him back to reality. He turned around and realized they had an audience. 

“Way to go Merlin!” Eoin hollered. “How long have you been trying that maneuver?”

“Er, maybe an hour?” he said.

“You got it faster than some of the knights then.” Leon said coming up to join them. 

“We’ll make you a blade master, yet!” Lancelot smiled, clapping him on the back and giving his shoulders a squeeze. 

“Ugh. No thanks. Being able to survive is good enough for me. I’ll stick to… other means if I can help it.” Merlin said. 

“Aw, cheer up Merlin.” Arthur said. “We are just making sure you can protect yourself in a battle if necessary.”

“Oh, come on. I usually handle myself just fine! Or do you think that tree limbs naturally fall on bandits in the midst of attacks?” He asked pointedly. 

“Fair point. Well, since you’ve already done some sword lessons for the day, How about some hand-to-hand? Who wants to go today?” Arthur asks looking around. 

“I’ll give it a go,” Corbett says. At that they stepped back and removed their shirts. Unfortunately Merlin had a couple blades hidden in a baldric that he had been gifted by Ada and pulled it off as well. He hated to be away from the blades, but he didn’t want anyone to get hurt in a training session. When he proceeded to pull the remaining blades out and set them aside so all six were laying on his shirt, he looked up to see the others eyeing him cautiously. 

“What?” Merlin asked.

“Nothing.” Arthur said with a glint in his eye. “Proceed.” He grappled with Corbett for a little while and was having trouble with a move that he was trying to teach him. It would be a handy move to know, but he just couldn’t grasp it. After what felt like ages, they called time. Merlin was breathing pretty heavily laying on the ground again. 

“I think you are all enjoying this too much.” Merlin said not moving. Percival came over and helped him up. 

“You’re doing quite well. We have all been fighting most of our lives. You haven’t. It just takes some time. You’ll get there.”

“Thanks, Perc.” Merlin walked over and started putting his blades back where they belonged. He was pulling his shirt on when he came over to the group where Corbett was making a stew and Eoin was trying to quietly ask about the large burn mark on Merlin’s chest. He sat down and noticed the others all staring at him. “I promised that I would tell you all more, and I will. But I can’t do it all at once, and some of them I’m not ready to talk about yet. But if there is something you want to know, you can ask me about one tonight. Just one. So figure out amongst yourselves what it is you want to ask about.” He told them. Corbett handed him a bowl so he could eat before he told his story. Merlin was just finishing when Elyan came and sat next to him. 

“Alright, while we could ask about any of them, for now, why don’t you tell us about the burn?” 

“If you’re sure.” He looked at each of them. “Ok, well it was about four years ago, maybe a little more. Anyway, we were out on a hunt and a magical creature attacked us. We had no idea what it was. When we got back to Camelot, one Knight had been killed. When Arthur gave the report to the King, he noticed Gaius flinch at the creatures’ description. It was a Questing Beast.” Merling paused and made an image of the creature in the air before letting it fade. “Much like the griffon, it was a magical creature and could only be killed by magical means. The problem was, anyone bitten by the beast was doomed to die. There was no cure for the bite. It would drain away a person’s life force. Naturally the King sent his Knights and Prince Arthur out to meet the creature and vanquish it. We found the cave it was hiding in and Arthur and I got separated from the other Knights as it had snuck up behind us. It swiped at us and Arthur and I got separated. I used the same spell on a fallen sword that I used against the griffon, but I was too late. The beast had bitten Arthur.” He paused letting that sink in. “Before I tell you the next bit, I need you to promise you won’t get angry.” He said looking at his friends. 

“Being a bit dramatic again, are we?” Arthur asked.

“No, not at all. I just know that you will get angry about what happened next. About what I did.” He said looking to the ground. 

“Very well. We will not get angry.” Arthur said.

“Ok then. When we got back to Camelot Gaius could see you’d been bitten and the people had even started to keep vigil in the square preparing themselves for your death. I couldn’t accept it. I was told I had a destiny to protect you, and I couldn’t accept that I had failed at that in knowing you less than a year. I went to the dragon and asked for help. I told him you were dying. He told me to seek out a High Priestess, one who had dominion over life and death, at the heart of the Isle of the Blessed. And with her help I could save you. But there would be a price. I left that night. I got a small pack and headed for the Isle. When I got there I found Nimueh. The one who had tried to poison me, was now my only hope to save the Prince. She told me she could save Arthur, but in order to save a life, a life must be taken. The balance must be restored. I offered my life. She then gave me water from the Cup of Life. As I got back to Camelot Gaius and I rushed to Arthur’s side and forced him to drink. As soon as he drank, he began healing. That night I sat in my room preparing for my life to be taken. But when I woke in the morning I couldn’t figure out what happened. My mother had come to Camelot that same night very gravely ill. Nimueh had tricked me. Instead of taking my life she made to take my mothers. I was furious. I went to the dragon to find out why he would do this. My mother was the only family I had. I finally told Gaius what had happened. I told him I was going to go back to the Isle and demand that Nimueh take my life as originally bargained. Gaius tried to talk me out of it but I left to tell Arthur goodbye. Then I came back and sat with my mother. We talked for a while and said our goodbyes. When I came out of my room to say my goodbyes to Gaius, I found a letter. He had left for the Isle to offer his life for my mothers. I left as fast as I could. As soon as I got to the Isle I found Nimueh chanting and standing over Gaius’ still form.” Merlin cleared his mind and waved his hand above the fire to show them what had happened. 

Merlin was facing off with Nimueh.  _ I bid my life for Arthur’s, not my mothers, not Gaius’! _ He yelled.  _ The Old Religion does not care who lives or who dies, only that the balance of the world is restored. To save a life, a life must be taken. Gaius knew this _ , Nimueh said.  _ It is not the Old Religion that has done this it is you, _ Merlin hissed.  _ Come now, we are far too valuable to each other to be enemies _ Nimueh teased.  _ No, I share nothing with you!  _ Merlin shouted.  _ With my help, Arthur will become King _ , Nimueh said.  _ I will make Arthur King. But you will never see that day! _ Merlin yelled. He threw a spell at Nimueh only for her to catch it.  _ Your childish tricks are useless against me, Merlin. I am a priestess of the Old Religion _ she said and thrust a fireball at him. He managed to jump out of the way.  _ You too are a creature of the Old Religion, you should join me, _ Nimueh said.  _ You think I would join forces with such a selfish and cruel magic? Never. _ Merlin said.  _ So be it! _ Nimueh said. She then shot a fireball at Merlin’s chest and he fell, a large hold burned in his chest.  _ Pity, together we could have ruled the world,  _ Nimueh said. As she walked away, Merlin’s eyes opened and he got back up.  _ You should not have killed my friend! _ Merlin said reaching his hand towards the sky. Clouds began forming, the sky darkened, thunder boomed, and as Merlin thrust his hand at Nimueh, and lightning struck her where she stood, destroying her. He ran to Gaius crying and letting out a yell into the sky as rain continued to pour down on them.  _ Merlin _ , Gaius said softly.  _ Gaius! Gaius, you’re alive! _ Merlin said.  _ What did you do? _ Gaius asked.  _ Nimueh’s dead, the balance of the world has been restored _ , Merlin told him.  _ You amaze me! You’ve mastered the power of life and death itself! We’ll make a great warlock out of you yet! _ Gaius said. 

The scene faded away and Merlin looked at his friends to try to gauge their reactions. He was worried they would see him differently. 

“So. Hm. That happened your first year in Camelot.” Arthur said.

“Yes.”

“You killed a High Priestess, and mastered the power over life and death, while trying to sacrifice your life for mine…when you were 16?” He asked. 

“Yes…”

“Gwaine?” Arthur says.

“Yes, princess?” Gwaine responds a bit more subdued than normal.

“I don’t suppose you have something to drink to wash this information all down?”

Gwaine grinned. “You know me. Never leave home without something.” He got up and grabbed a couple skeins from his pack. Cups were passed and drinks were poured. Merlin didn’t feel like drinking tonight so he passed. He held on to that particular secret for a long time. It felt…strange letting it go. He couldn’t meet his friends’ eyes. He hugged his knees to his chest just watching the fire for a while. Looking at the flames Merlin made little figures dance and fly around. First a dragon, then a griffon, then a unicorn. Remembering earlier in the day, he stood abruptly and ran to his pack. How could he have forgotten! He brought the pack to the fire and set it carefully on the ground and pulled out the prize. The dragon egg. He held it in wonder. He had another thought and forgot about the Knights and the King getting up and running to a clearing. As he was running he yelled out in dragon-tongue trying to reach Kilgarrah. When he got to the clearing he waited until he heard the sound of rushing wind that meant he was close. Kilgarrah landed in front of him. Merlin just smiled. The dragon bowed to him in greeting. 

“Young warlock, what have you found?” 

“It is a dragon egg. You will no longer be the last of your kind.” He beamed at the dragon, then his smile faltered. “But I do not know what I need to do.”

“It is simple, young warlock. To call the dragon forth, you must give it a name.”

Merlin thought and placed the egg on a tree stump. Putting his hand up to the egg he closed his eyes and uttered “Aithusa”. The egg started cracking and a pure white dragon emerged. 

“A white dragon is indeed a good sign.” The newly hatched dragon climbed out of its egg and crawled up Merlin like he was a tree resting on top of his head. Merlin just smiled and laughed. 

“That’s adorable,” Gwaine said, breaking the silence, coming to stand next to him. Merlin turned and found all of his companions all standing at the tree line watching him and the dragons warily. 

“It is very difficult to take you seriously, Merlin, when you have a dragon as a hat.” Arthur added in. This got more laughs from the group. 

“So, Arthur Pendragon, you have come to accept Merlin after all.” Kilgarrah said looking at him.

“He’s my friend. My little brother, if you will. What would that make me if I didn’t accept him?” Arthur asks in response. The dragon chuckles at this. 

“What will you do now? Will you take Aithusa and teach him?” Merlin asks looking to Kilgarrah. 

“It is not our way, but I will look after him for a time. Take care, young warlock. I fear there are many trials ahead for you. I warned you before of the darkness that follows you. She stalks you even now, though she does not know it is you she seeks. She must not discover you.” At this Kilgarrah bowed one last time and took to the sky. When he was high enough he let out a roar and Aithusa nuzzled Merlin’s neck one last time and took flight to join his kin. When they were gone Merlin found himself unable to turn away. All that Kilgarrah said deeply troubled him. 

An arm was around him guiding him back to the camp. He was sitting in front of the fire now, pondering what was said. 

“Merlin.” Lancelot said. He finally looked up.

“Hmm?”

“Can you explain what the dragon meant?” He pressed.

Merlin shifted. “I can. Well, er, some of it I can. But you won’t like it.”

“We’re waiting.” Lancelot continued. 

“When I was rescued by Kilgarrah from the witch sisters a few years back, he said…he told me things were in motion now that could not be undone. He said our fates were now intertwined. She was the darkness to my light, the hatred to my love.” He stopped here for a second. “It’s my fault that she turned out the way she did. I betrayed her. It was my betrayal that drove her fully in to Morgause’s arms. As far as I can tell, the night the Caileach appeared to me, she also appeared to  _ her _ on the Isle. She was told that where she walked, I would walk in her shadow. Though she never knew my name. Not really. She knows  _ a _ name, and she has been searching for him never knowing that he, is me. She, the dark to my light, is Morgana. And she is desperately seeking the identity of the one destined to be her downfall.” 

“Emrys.” Percival said.

Merlin nodded. They all stared at him. 

“How do you know she is searching for Emrys?” Arthur asked. 

“Someone came by to speak to Gaius after we had gotten back from the Isle and asked him if he’d ever encountered a sorcerer by that name. It was only known to a select few at that point, and those that knew the name, knew it was me. But this person had no reason to be asking who Emrys was unless they were in league with Morgana. Before you ask, no, I will not tell you who it was. I have no proof of the alliance. But you have my word, as soon as I have the connection, the proof needed, I will bring it to you.” Merlin says looking at Arthur. 

“If this is supposed to be such a highly guarded secret, this identity, then it can’t be safe that we know.” Elyan says. 

“It’s not. But magic is still outlawed. What reason would Morgana have to believe that the Knights of the Round Table and the King know the identity of her doom? You need not fear Morgana for that reason. She is planning something. I know she is. Kilgarrah just confirmed my suspicions. I only hope there is enough time to act before it comes to fruition.” 

“Well, Merlin, this has been a truly…confusing evening. I am going to sleep before you spill any more sordid tales or my head explodes. Tomorrow we will run patrol for a few hours and then head back to Camelot. I suggest everyone else get some rest as well.” Arthur said and then went to his bedroll and climbed in. The others followed suit. 

Merlin was too awake to be able to sleep. He knew he should sleep, he knew he needed the rest, but he couldn’t. He just sat looking into the fire. He added some more sticks to keep the flame going. Maybe he had been wrong to share so much. Maybe they weren’t really ready to accept everything. He didn’t sleep. He just watched the flames and hugged his knees. He knew he was crying but there was nothing he could do to stop it. Eventually his eyes were dry and he felt a little hollow. Since he wasn’t able to sleep he decided he needed something else to focus on. He stayed near the sleeping forms of his companions but walked a few paces away. He pulled a blade out and proceeded to practice throwing with his non-dominant hand. If he could throw as well left-handed as he could right-handed it would be very beneficial. After a few dozen throws he felt he was being watched. It wasn’t his friends, they were still sleeping. He walked a little closer to them scanning the area nearby for what his senses caught. There. The man from his nightmares stepped out from behind a tree and walked closer to him. He knew he was afraid. He couldn’t hide it. Merlin didn’t want to be afraid anymore so he stopped backing up and faced the man. 

‘Well, well, well. What have we here...” Balin purred. 

“Why are you here?” Merlin asked. Glad his voice was steady, and hoping that his friends would hear him or sense his distress.

“Isn’t that obvious?”

“Pretend it isn’t.” 

“I’m here for you, of course. You are quite special. And I could not let that go. Our time together was cut short.” Balin spoke softly sauntering toward him. “ _ Merlin _ .”

When the man said his name his body shivered. “I think I had my fill of our time together.”

“Maybe you have, but I have not. I do not let go of my prey so easily. And you, Merlin, are the most intriguing prey I have come across in some time.”

“I am not prey.” Merlin said through clenched teeth.

“Oh, but you are. And before the week is through, I will have you. You can be sure of that.” Balin was close enough to touch now and Merlin was panicking. He was frozen in fear on the spot. Balin reached up to touch the scar he had left on Merlin’s face. Merlin grabbed the man by the wrist before he could touch him. The man’s eyes narrowed. Merlin was trying to stay calm but he could feel his anger and panic rising equally. He reached out with his mind to the others and all but yelled,  _ WAKE UP!  _ Thunder boomed overhead, though there were no clouds in the sky. The man grabbed him by his neck and wrapped his hand around his throat and pulled him close, lifting him off the ground. 

“I will have you. And there will be no one there to rescue you!” Balin yelled and threw Merlin back to the camp and took off running. Merlin had hit the ground hard. His head bounced off something solid and sharp and he could no longer focus. The others were chasing after Balin after they woke up in a rush and saw what was happening. 

Merlin’s head was spinning. He was coughing from having been thrown by his throat. All the training he had had was useless. When his tormentor appeared, his fear overtook him. He tried grabbing his head and tried to sit up only to fall to the ground again. Lancelot was kneeling next to him trying to help him sit up slowly. He was saying something but there was a loud ringing sort of sound. 

“Lance I know you’re trying to talk but my head is still ringing and I can’t make out your words. Just give me a minute.” Merlin said and focused his magic on healing himself enough that he could hear. After another minute his head stopped spinning and his hearing came back. He groaned. “Ok, now, what were you saying?”

“I only asked if you were alright, and if you could hear me. You kind of answered both of those already though.” Lancelot said looking concernedly at him.

“Please don’t look at me like that.”

“Like what?” 

“Like I’m some fragile thing about to break.” Merlin said rubbing his hands through his hair, finding blood. When Lancelot saw this he took his water and poured it over Merlin’s head to check to see if there were any more cuts that needed attention. Soon the others were back, having lost their quarry.

“Merlin, what the hell happened?” Arthur was furious. 

“You all went to sleep. I couldn’t. I sat here for a while then went a few paces away to practice throwing. I felt like I was being watched. When I saw him I just…I froze. I couldn’t move. I couldn’t do anything. I only snapped out of it when he tried to touch me.” Merlin shuddered at the memory. “At that point it didn’t really matter, I’d let him get too close already. Waking you all was my last defense. I was hoping that learning from you would help. But. I was too afraid.” Merlin put his head on his knees at this point unwilling to meet anyone’s eyes. “Am I ever going to be over this?” he whispered half hoping no one heard him. Hands roughly pulled him to his feet and were gripping his shirt putting him nose to nose…with Arthur.

“This. Is. Not. Your. Fault.” Arthur said punctuating each word for full affect. “There is nothing wrong with you. There is nothing wrong with being afraid. Merlin, you are my brother. You. Are. NOT. Alone.” He put his forehead against Merlin’s and they stood there like that for several moments. Merlin nodded and sniffled. When he looked up the other Knights had formed a circle around the two men. Arthur pulled something out of his pocket and showed it to Merlin. “This. This was my mother’s. It bears her sigil. I want you to have it.” He said putting it in Merlin’s hands. 

“Arthur. I can’t…” Merlin tried to protest. 

“Just…take it. Whenever you feel alone, reach for this.” He said closing Merlin’s hand over the sigil. Merlin just nodded. Arthur pulled him into a hug before he could react. And Merlin felt all the stress and fear dissolve. He couldn’t speak. But he felt a warmth go through him. He thought he might be glowing, but couldn’t be certain. 

“Thank you.” Merlin murmured. Arthur walked Merlin over to his bedroll and forced him to lay down. He then went back to the others and set up a watch. While Merlin was laying there He felt someone sit near his head. He looked up to see Gwaine giving him a small smile. 

“Get some rest Merls. We’ll watch out for you. He can’t hurt you anymore.” Gwaine traced Merlin’s cheek as he said this. The then ran his hands through Merlin’s hair. It was so relaxing Merlin was asleep before he knew what was happening. 


	11. Gifts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Merwaine fluff, Gwen sees the brand and is worried about her friend.

When Merlin woke up, the sun was high in the sky. It was close to midday. He couldn’t figure out how he had slept so long. He sat up and looked around. Gwaine and Lancelot were talking nearby. 

“Why didn’t anyone wake me?” Merlin asked, voice still deep from sleep. The two men looked to him and came over to sit beside him. Lancelot gave him some water and told him to drink. 

“You needed to sleep. Arthur refused to wake you. He headed out on a patrol earlier and took the others. We stayed to keep watch over you. Arthur decided it was best that you not accompany the patrol today. And we all agreed.” Lancelot told him. He then turned to grab some food.

“Thank you. For staying by me last night.” Merlin said looking at Gwaine. “It really helped.”

Gwaine pulled his face close and gave him a quick kiss. “Anytime.”

Merlin blushed but really appreciated the gesture. Lancelot handed him a dish and instructed him to eat. He did. After he was done eating he was feeling a little restless so he packed up his things in preparation of the others returning. He sat back down next to Gwaine leaning in to him for comfort. This caused Gwaine to smile and Lancelot to raise an eyebrow. Gwaine put his arm around him and pulled him close. He knew Merlin needed the touch more than anything right now. The touch was keeping him calm or at least not as agitated. Within another hour the others rode back into camp. 

Apparently there was no sign of where the man had gone. They all mounted up and headed back towards Camelot. Arthur and Leon went off to try to sort out the best course of action for future patrols. They did not want this man out there tormenting anyone else. Gwaine dragged Merlin back to his room instead of letting him go to the physician’s chambers where he would be alone. He made him lay down again to rest. As he said it, it looked like Merlin was about ready to pass out. Merlin didn’t even fight, just took off his jacket, neckerchief, and boots and lay down on Gwaine’s bed. Lancelot had told Gwaine that his responsibility for the rest of the day was Merlin. So he followed Merlin’s example and took off his chainmail, jacket, boots, and even took off his shirt, then lay down next to him. They lay there just looking at each other for a bit. Until Merlin could no longer keep his eyes open. Gwaine had started running his hands through Merlin’s hair again seeing how calm and peaceful it made him. 

********

One week after returning from the patrol when Merlin encountered Balin, Gaius had returned and could tell something was wrong. Merlin wasn’t smiling much anymore. He didn’t make as many jokes. He was not his usual happy self. This didn’t go unnoticed. Diana tried asking him what happened, but he wouldn’t talk about it. He hadn’t been down to the lower town since before the ordeal. He attended his sword lessons and hand-to-hand training. Sir Corbett had started crossbow training with him. He wasn’t great, but he hit the target. Gaius decided to send Merlin down to the lower town to check in on a patient. Merlin grabbed the medical satchel that was now his, and made his way to the house Gaius had directed him to. When he got there, he was surprised to find several of the little ones he told stories to in the previous weeks. As soon as he had walked in the door he was tackled by at least four little ones. He couldn’t help but smile and laugh as they jumped on him. 

“Merlin!” The man in the house exclaimed. “It’s great to see you! We’ve missed you!” The man, Eric, said coming over to him and pulling him up from under the children. 

“It’s good to see you too. I’m sorry I haven’t been around much.” Merlin said, trying to keep the sadness from his voice. 

“Well, you’re here now. Can we talk you into telling a story tonight? Everyone has missed it.”

“I suppose. I can give it a try I guess.” Merlin said, half-heartedly. 

“Please. It would mean a lot. Tell us a funny story, maybe something with a little romance too.” Eric said. 

Merlin gave a small laugh. “I actually have just the story.” 

“Great! First, though, please come in and do what you came to do. Elaine is in the back.” Eric said, gesturing for Merlin to come in and treat his wife. While Merlin had been tending to his patient, Eric had gone out and rounded up the townspeople in preparation for a story. When Merlin came out of the house, there were cheers and hugs and Merlin was pulled to the front of the group. They had constructed a small stage for him. He went up on the stage and set his medical supplies down and waved to everyone. 

“Hello everyone. Sorry I haven’t been around much lately, always busy, you know?” Merlin said with a smirk. “It was requested tonight that I tell you a funny story with a little romance. Is that alright?” The crowd cheered as he chuckled. “Ok, ok, settle down. Our tale begins with talks of peace.” Merlin tells of how Kings had gathered to sign a peace treaty, but one King did not want peace. He made plans to use his servant who had magic to put an enchantment on Prince Arthur and the Lady Viviane, the daughter of King Alined. This King was very protective of his only daughter and did not want anyone trying to woo her. The two royal children wanted nothing to do with each other. Besides, the Prince already had a secret love. One who was not appropriate according to his father and Tradition. One evening the sorcerer servant snuck into the Prince’s chambers and put a spell on him causing him to only think of the Lady. The same was then done to the Lady. She was enchanted to think only of the Prince. They were both acting like love-struck fools, their minds and their wills no longer their own. When they were caught by the Kings who were gathered to sign a peace agreement, The Lady’s father, King Alined threw down his gauntlet and challenged the Prince to a contest. The Prince was still spelled and accepted the challenge. But the Prince was caught in the powerful spell and was losing the contest! The Prince’s loyal servant knew the pair were under an enchantment but he had no idea how to break it. He spent many hours looking through many books trying to find a solution. The only thing he found that would break the enchantment, was true love's kiss. So the Servant found the Prince’s love and tried to appeal to her. She was very upset as the Prince was not acting like himself. He had forgotten about her and his feelings for her. The servant explained about the enchantment and begged her to help free the Prince. They ran to the tent that the Prince was in between fights and the servant left the Prince with his love. She reached up and kissed him. As soon as she did, the magic binding the Prince failed. He was himself again! But, he still had to finish the contest. He fought the King once more and prevailed, apologizing for causing such trouble when peace was more important. However! The Lady was still under the enchantment as none knew who her true love might be! The Kings were able to sign their treaty and bring about the peace they desired.

The crowd cheered as he finished his tale. Merlin noticed that the Knights and King were standing in the back along with Gwen. He blushed when he saw them smiling back at him. Drinks were brought out and passed around. Merlin was bombarded with hugs and hand-shakes. After about an hour of spending time with the people, Merlin said his goodnights and promised to return in a few days, then headed back to the castle. When he got to the courtyard he found his friends waiting for him. He smiled sheepishly at them. 

“Merlin. Was it really necessary to tell them that particular story?” Arthur asked.

“Necessary, no. but they asked for something funny. And romantic. It was the first one that came to mind.” Merlin replied.

“Not sure I entirely believe you.” Arthur said, grinning at him and then turning to go into the castle. 

“You ready for your lesson tonight, Merlin?” Lancelot asked.

“Ready as I’ll ever be, I suppose.” And the rest of the group headed to the clearing they used for his training. They were glad to see Merlin smiling again. After an hour, Merlin went up to his room and washed, feeling just a little bit better. 

The morning came early as it was another testing day for Merlin. He dressed and headed out to his usual testing spot. He had meant to get there early, but found the others already there. Gaius had gotten him a new shirt that was better for training as it lay closer to his body yet was still fluid enough that it moved along with him. It was his only short sleeve shirt and because of how much of his body it showed off, he hadn’t worn it that often. He had worn his jacket down and lay it over a branch like he usually did. The scars on his arms weren’t as noticeable as the rest of his body, but they were still there. He hadn’t gotten a haircut in a little while so it was starting to look a little shaggy. Not much change there, it just stood up even more in the mornings and refused to lay down. Gwaine was having trouble schooling his features as he couldn’t stop staring at Merlin and how defined he had become. How attractive he found the young man. Today marked two full months of training that Merlin had been doing. Arthur came forward and started the sword test. Merlin was outmatched as Arthur was still a phenomenal swordsman. Arthur didn’t hold back this time. Merlin managed to last about five minutes before being disarmed. He was pretty happy with that though. Five minutes against the best swordsman around and he wasn’t a Knight. Merlin felt like that was something he could live with. When it came to hand-to-hand, Arthur had Percival test him. Though he had been trained by Percival, he knew that he was no match when it came to an all in brawl. He lasted a good fifteen minutes. Percival reached a hand out to help Merlin up. This morning was strange to him as everyone was here, but they were all quiet. Eoin and Leon launched targets in the air and Merlin nailed each one with a dagger. First with his dominant hand, then his non-dominant hand. After he retrieved his daggers he came back to stand in the midst of the group in front of Arthur. 

“Congratulations, Merlin. You’ve managed to make it through a very intense training rubric designed for Knights. Seeing how well you are doing, it is time to advance. Your lessons will continue to take place at the same time each day. But. As soon as you walk into this clearing you must be prepared to defend yourself. Be prepared for anything. You may have one attacker, or two. The same will go for the other lessons. To celebrate, so to speak, your advancement, we have something for you.” At this Elyan brought forward a set of brand new chain mail and handed it to him. Merlin just stared at it, then looked up at the other men. 

“Thanks.” He said smiling as he accepted the chain mail. 

“There’s one more thing.” Arthur said walking forward to him. He handed a folded Knight’s cape with the Pendragon crest on top.

“Arthur, I’m not a Knight. And I don’t want to be.” Merlin said looking at his King.

“I’m aware Merlin. I’m not making you a Knight. You’re still not there. Yet. But you are going to start coming out on patrols again. And for what I have in mind, you are going to need to look the part of a Knight of Camelot. Do you trust me?” Arthur asked.

“Yes, I trust you with my life.” Merlin said, accepting the cape. 

“Good. Tomorrow we ride out. We’ll fill you in throughout the day. Now. Go and get on with your chores before anyone starts to wonder where you are.” Arthur says patting Merlin on the arm. As he walked off the group came together. 

“You think he’s ready for this?” Leon asked. 

“I do. We’ll all be right there in case anything happens. He needs to be tested and not by us.” Arthur said. 

“Mmm.” Came from Gwaine. 

“Gwaine.” Arthur said, trying to hide his irritation.

“Yes, princess?” He replied 

“Try to keep your thoughts to yourself, yeah? And stop ogling him when I’m around.” Arthur said.

He just ginned. “Only if you stop staring at Gwen when Elyan’s around.” Arthur had no comeback and just turned and walked away while the other Knights snickered. Percival gave Gwaine a playful shove as they followed Arthur back towards the castle. 

Merlin walked off to the castle smiling and holding his new possessions. He hadn’t realized he left his jacket on the branch or that everyone he passed in the citadel was staring at him. He bumped in to Gwen on the way the castle steps. Gwen was stunned by Merlin’s appearance. She’d not seen him in a shirt that was that snug to his body or had short sleeves before. He didn’t have his neckerchief or jacket on, so she saw some traces of the scars on his neck and the slavers brand. 

“Merlin!” She said as he nearly ran right into her.

“Gwen, uh, good morning. What brings you up this early?” Merlin asked.

“Nothing really. I just thought I’d come speak to Gaius. I know he doesn’t trust Lord Aggravaine, as I don’t, but we don’t really know what he’s planning. He’s got something in mind, but I can’t put my finger on why I don’t trust him. What are you doing up this early?” She asks curiously, trying not to stare.

“Oh, erm. Well, the, uh, Knights and the King have decided that if I am to continue to be on the patrols and such that I would be required to become proficient or proficient adjacent with basic swordsmanship. They’ve been training me in secret and testing me once a week. Just got done with my two month test.” Merlin told her, hiding a smile.

“That’s great! And I see they have given you something as well.” She said pointing out the chain mail and cape. 

“Yeah, Arthur said I would need it for a patrol for tomorrow. I’m not sure what they have in mind, but I trust Arthur. He wouldn’t put me in any danger. It should be…interesting.” 

“Merlin, I’ve never seen you in this shirt before. Is it new?” She asked.

“Yeah. Gaius got it for me so I could stop wearing my normal serving clothes to train in. It was getting hard to mend them much more. I was pretty clumsy when I first started so I ended up with a lot of slash marks that needed repaired. I’ve gotten better, but having an extra shirt that fits a little better helps. Well, I’ve got to go. I need to wash up and get Arthur his breakfast. I’ll see you around, yeah?” He said and then headed in, Gwen staring after her friend. 

Arthur and the others had seen Merlin and Gwen talking on the steps and hung back a bit so as not to interrupt. Arthur felt a bump at his shoulder only to find Gwaine standing next to him raising his eyebrows. Arthur rolled his eyes.

“Glad to see those two getting along. Wonder what they're talking about?” Gwaine said sincerely.

“Judging from how Guinevere is staring at Merlin, I can only guess. I’m going to have to talk to her. There’s no way she didn’t see some of his scars, let alone the brand.” When Merlin had gone inside and Gwen was staring after him, Arthur went up the stairs to her. When he got there, he saw the tears shining in her eyes. He had been right after all. The Knights were right behind him and could see she was distressed. “I know it’s a lot to take in. I can tell you some of it, but it is really up to Merlin on how much he would want you to know.” Arthur told her, taking her hand in his. Her tears had started flowing down her face. 

“How could anyone  _ hurt _ Merlin?” She asked in confusion. 

“You’ve heard some of his stories, right? Well he doesn’t always tell the full truth. He leaves out the parts where he got injured or barely survived. He doesn’t want any pity.” Lancelot said.

“I understand. But, he’s my friend. Probably my best friend.” She paused looking at Arthur. “I want you to tell me a little, but I will speak with him. Also, I think that he needs some new clothes. Have you seen him? When did he get so many muscles?” She asked, blushing slightly. 

“Hard to look away, right?” Gwaine said, winking at her. Oh. 

“Really, Gwaine? You had better not corrupt him, or you’ll have me to answer to!” She said sternly.

“Why is it, everyone thinks I’m going to be the corruptor?” He asked feigning innocence.

“Perhaps it is because you have a particular reputation.” Gwen said, narrowing her eyes at him and pointing a finger in his direction.

Gwaine chuckled and held up his hands in defense. “I’ve already been chastised by the Princess and Lancelot. There’s no need to add anyone else to the list.”

“Well. If you break his heart, just know that you will have me to answer to.” Gwen was very serious. 

“Yes, ma’am.” Gwaine answered bowing slightly and then heading inside. Leaving the others behind to laugh at him and then head off to their own training and tasks. Arthur and Gwen walked side by side to his chambers where he sat Gwen down at the table to try to find the best way to tell her some of what happened. She sat patiently waiting for him to start. 

“Do you remember, when we all left the citadel for a hunt the day after the tournament?” He asked her. 

“Yes.” 

“Well, we had recently found out about Merlin’s birthday. He had hidden it. Turns out it was the last day of the tournament from my coronation festivities. Anyway, we devised a plan to take him out for his birthday and celebrate. We staged a hunt but ended up just going out a couple hours from the citadel and camped and drank and got him to open up a bit. He’s been through a lot, but it’s up to him to tell you. Anyway, the morning we were planning to come back, we were attacked by slavers. You remember? Well, they had taken out Leon, who was on guard last. While the rest of us started fighting, the leader went straight for Merlin. Pulled him up by his hair with a dagger at his neck, drawing blood. I panicked, I guess. I was so used to being the target I hadn’t thought that anyone would go after him. The man had watched us interact the previous day and knew we all cared for him. He bound, gagged, and blindfolded Merlin and put him on his horse away from us. It was either we went along, or he would have killed Merlin in front of us. When we arrived at their hideout, we were put in a cell but he took Merlin and chained him up in another cell away from us. There’s a lot that happened. The man, Balin was his name, was very interested in Merlin. He was a predator. There’s no other word for it. He pulled some lever and a wall separated us from him. I can still hear his screams some nights.” Arthur said rubbing his temples. “After a few hours the wall opened back up and Merlin was a bloody mess. He had been whipped and cut and…branded.” Arthur growled out the last word. “That’s when he went to Ealdor for a few weeks. When he got back, he was still traumatized, though he hid it well. We found him several times in the midst of panic episodes. Lancelot was the only one able to calm him at first, but he’s gotten better and now most of the Round Table can bring him back. He did really well, not having any attacks for a few weeks. When we went out on that hunt last week, we were woken up as Merlin was thrown into the camp by that man. Balin. I’ve never seen him so scared. Gwen, he was terrified of this man.  _ Is _ terrified. And there’s nothing I can do to make it better. He keeps apologizing to us for being afraid. Like it’s his fault. That man is out there and is hunting Merlin. He is hunting, my brother. And I can’t protect him. I know that he is hunting Merlin because when we were in the cells, he had said that there was a fire in Merlin’s eyes, and that he wanted to put it out. Gwen I can’t let that happen.” He finally finished. Gwen came over and hugged Arthur tightly, and he could tell she was still crying. It was a lot to take in. “I’m sorry we never told you, but we wanted to try to protect him. Though it may not seem like it, Gwaine actually has been helping him. As long as he is touching him, he seems to be able to stay relaxed and calm.”

“I’m glad he has someone then. I am a little surprised that Gwaine, of all people has caught Merlin’s eye, though.” Gwen said, trying to lighten the mood.

Arthur chuckled. “Yeah, I, uh, overheard a drunken Merlin telling Gwaine about his past relationships. He’s had two other loves before, did you know? That boy from the village that took an arrow for me when we stopped Kanen and his men, Will? That was his first. Then there was a girl, apparently, called Freya. Merlin didn’t want anyone to know. I guess he was afraid how we’d treat him. Don’t know why though. As long as it doesn’t interfere with his work, and he’s happy, that’s all that matters.”

Just then Merlin came in with a tray of food, in his usual attire, blue shirt, red neckerchief, though no jacket. When he saw Arthur and Gwen he paused, just for a second, before setting the tray on the table and walking over to open the curtains. Gwen extracted herself from Arthur, wiped her tears, and walked directly over to Merlin who jumped when she came up behind him and hugged him fiercely. She then smacked him on the arm eliciting an ‘ow’ from him. Arthur tried to contain his laughter, but was unsuccessful.

“After you are off today, you will come to my house. I am going to make a few new shirts for you for your training. No backing out of it. If you are not there, I will have Arthur put you in the stocks.” Gwen said to him sternly.

“Alright, alright. You two are quite perfect for each other, you know. Both of you tend to show affection and then simultaneously hit me at the same time. It’s really very confusing. I will come by this afternoon if Arthur lets me out of attending training with him.” Merlin says gathering the clothes on the floor. 

“Good. Don’t make me make good on my promise of the stocks.” She said and then turned and left the room after giving Arthur a peck on the cheek. 

“Should I ask what that was about?” Merlin asked while putting the clothes in the basket that Arthur never seemed to use. 

“No point Merlin. Just know that I will absolutely put you in the stocks if she tells me you didn’t show up.” Arthur said, sitting down to eat.

“Prat.”

“So, what would you like to know about the patrol, then?” Arthur says ignoring Merlin’s taunt.

“Erm, why me?” He asked.

“Why you, what, Merlin?” 

“Why are you wanting me for this particular patrol? You have a lot of good Knights and I’m, well I’m not one.” Merlin said.

“That’s why it has to be you. There have been reports of a band of renegades, or bandits, whatever they are, attacking the villages that are on the border by Caerleon. They know most of my Knights already, and have seen them fight. But none of them have seen you fight. For lack of a better word, you are bait to draw them out.” Arthur said looking across the room at him.

“And you think I’m ready for this?” Merlin asked quietly.

“Of course. You won’t be alone, though it will look that way. You will lead them to a designated area where we will be waiting to ambush them. I mean to capture the leader and find out why it is they are attacking.” He finished.

“Alright.” Merlin said moving over to the desk to organize what would be needed for the meetings today. Hm. Arthur hadn’t expected Merlin to accept so easily. But Merlin wasn’t upset or resigned. He actually seemed pretty happy. Arthur caught a glimpse of something on Merlin’s neck slightly hidden by his neckerchief, and it wasn’t the brand. He got up and walked over to Merlin and stood in front of him more or less pinning him against the wall behind the desk. “Arthur?” Merlin asked a little nervously. Arthur reached up and pulled the cloth down on his neck revealing the mark he had glimpsed and raised his eyebrows. Merlin, at this point, turned a violent shade of red.

“Merlin, what is this?” He asks knowing the answer already and enjoying watching the younger man squirm.

“Er, nothing.” He said, trying to get away from his King. 

“Hmm. If I didn’t know better, I’d say that you were trying to hide it…” Arthur said.

“Ok, look, um, not my fault, er, just pretend you saw nothing and it will make this much less embarrassing for me.” He said, still trying to get away.

“Oh, no, I plan to make this as embarrassing as possible. If this is going to continue, I will call you both out in front of all the Knights, and potentially the council meetings. I’m glad you’re both happy, but please, keep it hidden, yeah? Besides, this seems very much like he is marking his territory.” Arthur said pointing at his friend and backing away. Merlin felt like he would pass out from the embarrassment. 

“Yes, Sire.” He said and left the room with the laundry readjusting his neckerchief to try to cover himself back up. He was going to corner Gwaine later and chew him out. Though remembering the encounter after his testing was enough to make him smile. He was in his room washing up, Gaius had just left to go deliver medicines, and Gwaine came in and shut the door behind him. He didn’t even get a hello out and Gwaine had pinned him against the wall. The stone was cool against his bare skin. He didn’t know what got into him, but he melted at the other's touch. Gwaine was running his hands up and down Merlin’s chest and then before he could react, he pushed Merlin to his room and down on his bed. Woah. Merlin was not prepared for this. But he was caught up in the moment. He pulled the other closer against his body grabbing his hair and then pulled the others shirt off and threw it across the room. He rolled over on top of the other man surprised at himself, but enjoying the heat he felt rushing through his body. Gwaine had started kissing down his jaw and slowing on his neck. Merlin felt his magic barely under his skin rushing to the surface in response. Gwaine rolled Merlin over and they both landed on the floor in a tangle of limbs both laughing as it broke them out of their reverie. 

“Lance was right, you are a bad influence.” Merlin said out of breath. Gwaine chuckled and moved to get up, but Merlin pulled him back down. “Well, maybe a few more minutes wouldn’t hurt.” He said pressing their lips together again. When Gwaine was kissing his neck, Merlin felt his magic about to burst out. “Gwaine” he whispered, trying not to moan. He failed. His magic burst out then. And Merlin covered his face with his hands, knowing that his eyes were now shining a bright gold. Gwaine found this adorable.

“Merls. Look at me.” Merlin slowly moved his hands away and opened his eyes. “You’re quite beautiful, you know that, right?” Gwaine told him.

“Thanks. You’re quite attractive yourself.” Merlin said, trying to get his heart back in control. “I, uh, I should get to work. Don’t need Arthur coming looking for me.” He said. Gwaine gave him one last kiss and helped him to his feet. 

“I just wanted to make sure you knew what you meant to me, is all. It’s not just a fling. I care about you. You deserve to be taken care of.” Gwaine said, touching Merlin’s face gingerly. “Now, go take care of the King. I’ll see you later.” Gwaine grabbed his shirt and left. Merlin collapsed on his bed for a minute. What was he getting himself into! After a few minutes he got up and saw in his mirror that Gwaine had left a trail of marks down his neck. Great. He only hoped Arthur wouldn’t notice. Of course that hadn’t worked out.

Remembering it when he got to the sink, made his face feel warm. He hoped he could get away with people thinking that it was just the hot water from washing the clothes. He was very distracted the rest of the day. He managed to wash the clothes in a daze and attended the council meetings where Arthur kept grinning at him knowingly.  _ Prat _ . Merlin said through his thoughts causing the King to chuckle and quickly try to cover it with a cough. This wasn’t missed by Aggravaine. He kept an eye on Merlin, which made him uncomfortable. The way he looked at him almost reminded him of Balin. After the meeting was over, Merlin followed Arthur back to his chambers to help him into his armor to prepare for training. As they walked out of the castle Arthur sent Merlin to Gwen’s and walked over to the training field where he proceeded to yell at Gwaine in front of everyone. Merlin almost ran all the way to Gwen’s trying to hide his embarrassment. He hadn’t heard what Arthur was saying, but it was very loud and the others watched and tried to hide their laughter. 

“Merlin!” Gwen said and opened the door when ushering him inside. And giving him a hug. He smiled at her.

“Hey Gwen. So what is it I need to do?” He asked her, hoping to avoid revealing his love marks. 

“Nothing much. Just stand there while I take some measurements. Do you have a preference on color?” She asked.

“Hmm. Not really. I usually stick to my blue and red, but that shirt Gaius got me is white, so I’m ok with whatever. Black, green, blue. Actually, stick with blue. I like blue. Maybe a black shirt would be nice too.” He said, feeling like he was rambling. Gwen just chuckled at him.

“Don’t worry, Merlin, I won’t put you in anything that I don’t think you wouldn’t look good in.” She said. “Now, hold out your arms and I’m going to start measuring. Try not to move too much.” He nodded. And just realized he was missing his jacket. Great, he left it out in the clearing that morning. He’d have to get it later. 

“So. Merlin. You know that you’re my best friend, right?” She said walking around him.

“Yes.” Merlin said, unsure where this was going.

“And you know that I’ve told you a great deal of my life and you’ve helped me a great deal.” She continued. 

“Yeah, I know.” Merlin said.

“Good. Now, I’m only going to say this once, because if you don’t listen, there will be dire consequences.” She said looking him in the eyes. “This is not a one-sided friendship. I refuse to accept that you are my best friend, but that you don’t feel that way about me. We’ve been through a lot together. At the least, I demand that you sit and gossip with me to talk with me about yourself once a week. I will not accept that you don’t have time. I know that you have things you aren’t going to want to talk about. And I know that I may not be prepared for some of what you have been through, but you need to know that you are not alone. Arthur sees you as his brother. Which means you are more or less my brother as well” She paused here taking a breath. “After this morning, I saw some of your scars and…that awful brand. I was very cross that you had hidden that from me. Arthur told me the story behind those, but he shouldn’t have had to.” She was poking her finger in his chest then. 

“I’m sorry, Gwen. It wasn’t my intent to not tell you. I just still have trouble sometimes with that  _ event _ . The Knights and Arthur have been helpful, but it was a lot. I could tell, still can sometimes, how guilty they feel about what happened to me. It wasn’t their fault, but I know they blame themselves.” Unconsciously, Merlin had reached up and touched the scar on his face. 

“Did that man do this to you as well?” She asked quietly. Merlin just nodded. Gwen placed her hand on his face and forced him to look up from the ground. “You are a brave, brave man, Merlin. And you are so loved. Never forget that. No matter what Arthur may say.” She said smiling at him. He smiled and hugged her. But as he pulled away, his neckerchief had shifted and Gwen caught a glimpse of his neck. “Merlin!” She all but shouted, pulling the cloth away. He was instantly red.

“No, don’t Arthur already gave me a hard time and has been embarrassing me all day.” He said, trying to forestall her.

“I hope so!” She said blushing herself and then laughing at his expression. This caused him to laugh as well and the two sat down and laughed together for a time enjoying the company. “So, tell me everything! Do not leave anything out.” She said leaning in as she put down some cups of tea she made between them. 

“Erm, well, it, uh, it was after I talked with you on the steps. I went up to my room to wash. Gaius had left to deliver some medicines. I hadn’t been expecting anyone, but he, uh, came in and pushed me up against the wall.” He paused as a smile spread across his face that he couldn’t stop. “It was…very enjoyable. I hadn’t been prepared for it. But my heart sped up so fast I thought it was going to burst. He pulled me away from the wall and pushed me down on the bed.” He tried clearing his throat. And took a drink when it didn’t work. “Anyway, it was…intense. And amazing. It was just kissing, but I haven’t felt anything like that in a long time. I almost forgot what it felt like to have someone, uh, want me, I guess. Well, we ended up falling on the floor but after a time I told him I needed to go and tend to Arthur otherwise he’d burst in looking for me.” Gwen was fanning herself thinking about it. 

“Merlin! That is not what I expected from you! From him, yes, but not you!” She said giggling.

“I don’t know what came over me! I couldn’t stop myself.” He chuckled. “Gwen, since we’re on the topic of sharing, you should know that it doesn’t matter to me if it’s a man or a woman. I’ve loved both. I’ve lost both. It’s kind of what has kept me from getting involved with anyone for the last few years. I was afraid to lose them. But, I forgot how amazing it feels. How light and warm and…exciting. It doesn’t hurt that I’ve always found him very attractive.” He said, blushing furiously.

“I’m glad, Merlin. He is wild, and brash. Maybe you can balance him out a bit.” She chuckled and then they just sat there in silence enjoying the company. “I should have some shirts ready for you in a few days. And Merlin? Be careful on this mission and come back safe.” She gave him a last hug and he headed back to the castle. 


	12. Caerleon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Arthur listens to Aggravaine causing Merlin a lot of distress.

Morning came early and Merlin grabbed all he thought he would need. He placed the chain mail and cape in his pack and headed to the kitchen to gather provisions. Between Merlin and the stable hands they managed to get all the horses lined up in the courtyard. There were 20 in all. Merlin was a little surprised at the numbers, but figured that meant Arthur was expecting a somewhat larger force. Merlin was also surprised that Aggravaine was coming along, but didn’t say anything. He really disliked that man. And the man clearly disliked Merlin. Most of the Round Table Knights were present, several others, and, of course, Arthur leading. Merlin rode at Arthur’s side, like always. At least until the end of the first day. When they set up camp for the night, Merlin went about doing his normal tasks, setting out bedrolls, gathering firewood, and preparing a meal. Once everyone was fed, Merlin realized he hadn’t kept enough for himself. Not the first time this has happened, wouldn’t be the last. Once everyone was done he gathered the dishes and pots and took them to a nearby stream to wash them out. Of course anytime he was away from the main campsite, one of the Round Table shadowed him. Gathering firewood, it had been Elyan. Doing the dishes, it was now Percival. He didn’t mind. He found Percival’s presence comforting.

“Hey, Perc?” Merlin called.

“Yeah?”

“What happened at training yesterday? I heard Arthur shouting, but uh, wasn’t sure what it was about.” Merlin asked, trying for innocence. Percival chuckled.

“Not much. Arthur came out shouting about Gwaine needing to learn to keep his hands to himself and that corrupting impressionable youths was a dangerous game. He threatened to throw him in the stocks if he caught him again.”

“Are you serious?” Merlin asked. Percival just smiled. “That arrogant...dollop-head!” He said frustrated.

“Oh, come on! He just wanted to embarrass him a bit. Didn’t work though. All he did was wink at Arthur. Course then Arthur decided to spar with him and put him on the ground a few times. I think he’s better now.” Percival was looking at Merlin with a knowing grin.

“No. Nope. Don’t look at me like that. It’s not my fault.” Merlin said. “He started it.” He muttered under his breath. Which caused Percival to laugh even louder as the pair walked back to the camp. 

The laughter got them a lot of attention as they walked back to their respective positions. Aggravaine glared daggers at Merlin, though no one seemed to notice. Arthur raised an eyebrow at Merlin who promptly put on a straight face and tried to hide his amusement. They gathered around the fire that night, the Round Table Knights all taking protective positions around Merlin, causing him to roll his eyes. They had taken the role of his protectors quite seriously. Arthur went over the plan for the next morning and what the intent was. They would ride out another hour and then Merlin would go on foot from there another few miles. Just far enough that Arthur knew would gain the attention of the bandits in the area. There was a dead end that Merlin would lead them to, where the rest of them would be waiting. Merlin wasn’t sure how he felt about the plan, but figured he would be fine. He trusted Arthur and he knew he would never intentionally put him in harm’s way. When they turned in for the night, Gwaine came over and nudged Merlin to take a quick walk. He got up and they only went a few paces out of sight so as not to draw too much attention that the two had wandered off together.

“You are really trying to rile Arthur, aren’t you?” Merlin asked.

“Does the princess some good every now and then. Besides I wanted to check and see how you’re feeling about tomorrow? Also, did you eat earlier? I didn’t see you eat.” Gwaine asked.

“I’ll be fine. I plan to engage as little as possible leaving all the actual work to you trained and disciplined types.” Merlin said brushing off the eating question. 

“Just, be careful, yeah?” Gwaine said seriously. Merlin reached over and grabbed the other’s hand and squeezed reassuringly. They walked back to the camp and lay down across the fire from each other.

Arthur was anxious. He knew Merlin was ready but he was still anxious about sending him out as bait. And if  _ he  _ was anxious, Gwaine was positively radiating with unease. He needed to reel him in so he didn’t do anything crazy. Before he could approach him, they saw Merlin running into the dead end with the bandits directly behind him. Seeing him make it there safely, put his mind to rest and he leapt into the battle. It was a shorter fight than he had anticipated, but worth it nonetheless. Once the bandits were rounded up, his uncle brought forward a man and threw him down in front of Arthur. 

"I'm afraid this is no ordinary bandit," Aggravaine said. He then pulled something from the man's neck. It was the seal of Caerleon. This man was Caerleon’s King. 

Arthur had not expected to find another monarch invading his realm and attacking his people. This put Arthur in a foul mood as his uncle insisted on the man’s execution. Aggravaine was pushing Arthur to demand a treaty be signed, though Arthur knew the King wouldn’t sign it, and if he refused, Aggravaine insisted he execute him as an example. It’s what his father would have done. He knows this, but that wasn’t the kind of King he wanted to be, was it? He was stuck. His uncle usually heeded good advice, but Arthur did not feel this was good advice. Merlin had tried to speak with him, too, but he had shouted at him and sent them both off so he could try to decide what to do. There was no good outcome that he could see. 

Merlin was seething at Aggravaine and barely containing his magic. This was not Arthur. Somehow, Aggravaine had convinced him that as King, he was alone in making his decisions and that certain opinions shouldn't matter to him. Aggravaine had used Arthur's father's legacy as his argument. And, in the end, he had conceded to Aggravaine’s insistence. He could tell that some supported his decision, and he could also tell that there were some that did not. To say that Merlin was upset with Arthur, was an understatement. Merlin started to only speak to him when necessary for his role as manservant. 

Lancelot had spotted Merlin in their camp and occasionally a spark seemed to come off the young warlock. He put a hand on the boy and guided him to a clearing out of sight of the camp. 

"Merlin, you need to get your magic under control. You are sparking and there are too many people to hide this from. If you need to take some deep breaths, then do it. If you need to expel excess magic, then do it out here and come back when you get it under control." Lancelot then walked back towards the camp. Merlin knew he was right and sat down and started taking many deep breaths and was finally able to dispel his pent up magic. 

When they returned to Camelot, Arthur started distancing himself from those he’d called friends. His uncle had gotten in his head. He shouldn’t be friends with his Knights, or servants. Arthur decided that maybe his uncle was right. He was the King and he was the one who should be making these decisions. 

Merlin was frustrated. It had been a few days since they returned from the mission that he was a part of. When Arthur had killed Caerleon's King. Gwen came into the physician's chambers then and was crying. 

"Gwen, what's wrong?" He asked getting her to a chair to sit down.

"Arthur. I don't understand what's got into him. He came by to tell me that we can't be together. That we could never be. Why would he do that, Merlin?" She asked looking up to him, eyes full of hurt. He sighed. 

"Arthur, would never want to cause you this much pain or hurt. It's...it's Aggravaine. He is convincing Arthur that he needs to be more ruthless. More like Uther, in order for his enemies to leave Camelot alone. I'm not sure how to get him to realize how wrong he is." 

"Aggravaine. I should have known. I'm sorry for coming to you like this Merlin. I just wasn't sure who I could talk to."

"Hey. You can always come to me. We're friends. Best friends. Now, don't let that cabbage-headed King fool you. He loves you. He can't just turn that off. He'll come 'round." Merlin said getting a small laugh from Gwen at the name calling. He gave her a hug and she headed back to her duties.

That afternoon, when a patrol returned saying that Caerleon’s Queen was marching her army toward Camelot, Arthur knew he’d made the wrong decision. He gathered his troops and they marched to meet the approaching force. When they arrived, they set up their tents and fires. He watched as his Knights and Merlin sat around the fire laughing and enjoying each other’s company. Leon and Percival were constantly reaching over and ruffling Merlin’s hair, teasing him about something. Why had he distanced himself from them again? He missed the camaraderie. Sitting in his pavilion, he was surprised when he looked up and found his most trusted Knights and Merlin standing there, reassuring him that they stood with him. He hadn’t realized that was what he had needed. 

Merlin watched as the Knights reassured Arthur, and saw him melt a little. When everyone was asleep, Merlin saw Arthur sneak out of his pavilion and head down the cliffs towards Caerleon’s forces. Unfortunately he wasn’t paying much attention as his thoughts were hyper-focused on his King, and hadn’t heard the guards come up on him. When he was brought into the pavilion behind Arthur, he could see the shock and anger on his face. 

"Sorry about this." Merlin apologized, but it was already too late. Arthur asked the Queen to let Merlin go and invoked the right to single combat. So. That was his plan. To sacrifice himself to try and correct the mistake he made. Typical. When they got back to Arthur’s pavilion, he could tell Arthur was furious. Merlin was as well. His friend was spiraling. Angry words were said and the pair went their separate ways. Merlin had to go expel his magic again to prevent any kind of episode while he was this angry. Gwaine had been on watch and stealing a kiss or two helped as a good distraction too.

The following morning, Arthur gathered his council and informed them of his decision. Aggravaine was enjoying this. Arthur was listening to him, not his friends. Merlin could say nothing to reach his King.He simply stood at the back of the pavilion and kept his gaze down avoiding saying anything unless spoken directly to. When Merlin was helping Arthur put his armor on, Arthur could tell he was trying to hold his tongue. 

"Merlin, here I want you to give this to Gwen. Tell her...tell her I'm sorry." Merlin simply nodded not trusting himself to start talking and make things worse. "I should have listened to you, Merlin. If I had, maybe we wouldn't be in this mess. I'm sorry, old friend. Little brother." Merlin smiled at Arthur. When Aggravaine came in and asked if all was ready, instead of just saying he was ready, Arthur looked to Merlin. "Ready?" he asked.

"Ready" Merlin responded. The two clasped arms and Merlin could swear he felt irritation flooding off of Aggravaine.

As soon as Arthur pulled out his sword, Merlin felt it, and his face dropped. Dark magic. But, how? Arthur headed out and was down between the two forces before Merlin could recover and warn him. Merlin stood at the cliffs’ edge surrounded by the Round Table Knights with Aggravaine not far away. Merlin felt like he was practically humming with energy. Lancelot sensed his unease and put his hand on his shoulder.  _ Morgana _ , Merlin thought to Lancelot, and felt the man tense. Merlin couldn’t speak as he knew his power would surge out. All he could do was watch. Arthur fought bravely and well, as Merlin knew he would. But Merlin soon felt the magic activate on Arthur’s sword, and it stuck in the ground. Merlin reacted and lashed out with his magic to stop the swing at his King. Then Arthur met Merlin's eyes, and he calmed. Merlin caused the same magic to affect Caerleon’s champion that had affected Arthur’s, muttering a spell as quietly as he could. He’d had to say a spell to direct the magic. He could only hope no one heard. After his opponent dropped his sword, Arthur tripped the man and had him on the ground, ready to deal a death-blow. But he looked up and met Merlin’s eyes again. Merlin was his little brother. He always had sound advice. If he’d only listened before, this disaster could have been avoided. Arthur drove the sword into the ground next to the fallen opponent’s head. Instead of a war, Caerleon and Camelot signed a treaty.

When they arrived back in Camelot, the citizens were waving flags and cheering for their returned friends and family. Merlin set to putting the horses away with the stable hands and instead of heading to his room, he headed to the clearing where he trained and sent a tendril of energy to guide the Round Table Knights to him. He faced the woods waiting for them to arrive. Once they were there he turned to face them and could feel his eyes burning brightly. He had conjured a whirlwind around them. Only slightly on purpose. When the others saw this they became concerned.

“Merlin?” Leon said.

“Merlin, are you certain?” Lancelot asked cutting Leon off.

“I am. It was her.” He said.

“What was who?” Elyan asked, clearly confused.

“Morgana.” Merlin said and lightning crackled around them. He took a deep breath. He did not want to shock his friends by accident. “Arthur’s sword was enchanted to hold the weight of a thousand battles making it impossible to lift.” Merlin told them. “It was dark magic.”

“Are you certain?” Corbett asked him.

“Yes. I felt her presence when she activated the spell on the sword. She had to be nearby to do that. I didn’t have a choice but to interfere. I would not see Arthur killed.”

“How would Morgana have been able to enchant Arthur’s sword? No one came into the camp, it was only our own forces.” Leon asked.

“She had help. Morgana has an ally in Camelot.” Merlin growled out.

“We must be vigilant. This traitor will slip up eventually.” Lancelot said. “Now, Merlin, if you could dispense the wind, I for one, would like to get some rest in an actual bed.” He said, placing a hand on his shoulder.

Merlin had to concentrate a little harder than normal to dispel the wind as his anger was as wild as the tempest they stood in. With a deep breath out his magic surged out and the wind dispersed. The group headed back to the castle but Merlin couldn’t go just yet. His anger was still too close to the surface. He turned and headed farther into the trees. He needed to yell, but he knew that would involve lightning and magic lashing out. He came to a small cliff and stopped trying to force his magic down and just let it rage out. The clouds darkened and thunder rumbled across the sky. He yelled out his rage away from Camelot. Raising his hands the lightning struck several trees below him. After a few minutes the rumbling finally stopped. He sat down on the ledge and breathed, expelling the rest of his magic and dispelled the storm. That felt better. He leaned back on the ground and was looking up at the clear sky. He nearly jumped out of his skin when he felt a nudge at his shoulder.

“Gwaine! You scared me.” Remembering what just happened, he asked nervously, “how long have you been there?”

“Well, long enough to know that I should definitely not make you angry.” He replied.

“Sorry. I, uh, had to release my anger. It was too much. I really didn’t want anyone to see that. So far only Arthur has seen this, er, destructive side of me.” Merlin said looking down at his knees, unwilling to meet the other man’s eyes.

“Well it’s good you came out here away from the citadel. Come on. Let’s head back before Arthur sends a search party for you.” Gwaine says giving Merlin a hand up. The walk back to the castle was slow and quiet. When they got inside, Gwaine pulled Merlin to his room. Merlin just rolled his eyes. Gwaine was incorrigible.

“Gwaine, listen, I know we haven’t spent much time together the last few days, but, we still need to be careful.” Merlin said as he entered the room.

“Merlin, you just put on quite a display of power. It was very…stimulating. Intriguing. I just want to steal a few minutes of your time.” Gwaine was saying as he pulled off his armor and boots and then his shirt. Merlin grinned. He couldn’t help it. Why not? He could spare a few minutes before Gaius wondered where he was. And Arthur wouldn’t need him until morning. He decided to be the one to make the first move this time and pushed Gwaine against the wall. This only lasted for a short time before Gwaine was pulling Merlin’s shirt off and throwing it on the floor. Gwaine pushed Merlin back until he landed on the bed. Merlin chuckled. Gwaine had pushed him down on a bed twice now. He definitely did not mind. Merlin decided to do to Gwaine what had been done to him. He rolled the other over and kissed down his neck making sure to leave a clear mark. Gwaine chuckled.

“This is payback, isn’t it?” He asked, a little breathless.

“Absolutely. It’s only fair.” Merlin said, smiling. He really, really, enjoyed kissing Gwaine. He liked the way his hands wandered. Just then the door burst open and the two somehow crashed to the floor all tangled up.

“Ow.” Merlin said as Gwaine had landed on top of him. Laughter was heard from the doorway.

“What have we here?” a familiar voice called. Great.

“Do you often barge into other people’s rooms and demand to know what they’re doing? Not very King-ly of you,  _ Sire _ .” Merlin said, trying to hide his face.

“Yeah, what he said,” Gwaine added.

“Merlin? I need to speak with you. When you are, uh, a little less tangled up.” Arthur said and then left the room shutting the door to many disappointed shouts. Great. Guess they would be the new gossip spreading through the citadel.

“Well, so much for stealing a few minutes. Guess you better go tend to the princess.” Gwaine said, though not making a move to let the other up.

“You know, in order to do that, I need to be able to get up.” Merlin said, running his hand through Gwaine’s hair. That was the wrong move. Gwaine then proceeded to kiss him more passionately than anyone had the right to kiss someone else. And then he got up and stuck a hand out to pull him up off the floor.

“That,” Merlin said, voice cracking slightly, “was not fair.”

“Merlin!” Arthur’s voice rang through the hallway.

“Yeah, I know, just wanted to leave you with something on your mind before the princess got you too busy. Now go, or he’ll come back in here and drag us both out.” Gwaine said, pulling him to his feet and helping him get his shirt back on. “Oh, and Merlin?”

“Yeah?”

“Your, uh, your eyes are a little multicolored. Think you can do something about that before you wander the halls?”

“Right.” Merlin said, rolling his eyes. “I have no control over it right now. I’m stuck with this until I can…unwind.”

Gwaine chuckled. “Alright. Well, I’ll see you tomorrow. Remember, you still owe me a drink from getting you out of the collapsing tomb.” Gwaine said as Merlin was at the door ready to leave. Merlin knew there were no less than four Knights on the other side of the door.

“I remember. Maybe tomorrow night? I’ll be down that way anyway, as I know Diana or Ada will come grab me and drag me down there by my ears for a story. Walk down with me. Should be…fun.” At that he opened the door, spilling Elyan, Percival, Leon, and Eoin into Gwaine’s room. Merlin just laughed and jumped over them running down the corridor to catch up to Arthur. This was going to be a fun conversation.

When he got to Arthur’s room, he walked in and found Arthur attempting to take his armor off on his own. Merlin hurried over and undid the fastens quickly, pulling it off and removing his chain mail.

“How is it you can do that so quickly?” Arthur asked, clearly bewildered.

“I’ve been helping you in and out of your armor for years now, Arthur. I could probably do it in my sleep.” As Merlin was saying this he had gone over to the wardrobe and pulled out fresh clothes for Arthur and set them on the changing screen. Arthur watched him for a minute.

“I hope I didn’t interrupt anything for you earlier.” Arthur said mockingly.

“Oh, I’m sure you do. Just couldn’t let me have a few minutes to myself, could you dollop-head?” Merlin replied cheekily.

“Maybe next time you’ll lock the door, then.” Arthur said daring.

“Yeah. Because now you’re obviously going to make sure not to let us alone together. I can see it in your face. Oh, before I forget, here.” Merlin takes the ring Arthur had given him to give to Gwen, out of his pocket and hands it back to the King. “I don’t think you should wait any longer. You love her, she loves you. Honestly when you two are in a room together and gazing adoringly into each other’s eyes, it’s very distracting.” Merlin said grinning at him.

“Really? Is that how you feel  _ Mer _ lin?” Arthur asked, coming to stand right in front of Merlin.

“Yes,  _ Sire _ .”

“Hmm. Alright, Merlin, get out of here. Make sure to polish my armor by tomorrow. And when you go see Gwen, ask her to come by in the morning. I need to speak with her.” Merlin grinned and nodded. He had to head down to Gwen’s and pick up the shirts that she promised him anyway. It was late evening when he was walking to her house so he wasn’t too worried about people spotting him and bothering him tonight. When he knocked on her door, she smiled, a little sadly, and let him in.

“Merlin, perfect timing.”

“Yeah, I suppose it is. Listen, Arthur…Arthur was an idiot, an utter cabbage-headed fool a few days ago. Well, he still is, but, he knows how wrong he was. Though he may or may not say it out loud. He asked for you to come see him in the morning. I understand how much he hurt you. He did the same to me. He was following some bad advice from someone he thought he could trust.”

“Aggravaine.” Gwen said flatly.

“Yeah. He disregarded both of us for a bit there.” Merlin said sadly. They hugged for a minute, Gwen trying to wipe away a few tears before Merlin saw.

“Anyway, you’re here for your shirts. I have three, I hope that’s ok?” Gwen asked.

“That’s great!” Merlin said. She brought out the shirts and showed them to him. “Gwen, these are wonderful.” He said, smiling.

“I’m glad you think so. Now. Before you go, I want you to try at least one of them on. I want to be the first one to see you in it.” She said. Merlin stiffened a little. He knew she wasn’t prepared for the amount of scars he had. “Calm down, go behind the screen there and try it on. I know you aren’t ready to share with me just yet. Go on.” She said pushing him behind the screen. When he was behind the screen he pulled his neckerchief off and his shirt up and set them over the screen. Gwen tried her best to stay put but peaked behind the screen getting a quick glance at his back. She had to stifle her gasp when she saw, quickly turning away so no tears came while he was here. When he came out the shirt was nicely formed to his now muscular frame and matched his eyes. “Oh, Merlin. You look fantastic.” She said watching him. He blushed but she spun him around testing the fabric to make sure he had room to maneuver in it. “Perfect!” She said and hugged him again.

“Thanks Gwen.” He grabbed his other things and walked back to the castle wearing his new shirt. Gaius of course was glad he was back. Noticing the new shirt he gave Merlin a raised eyebrow.

“Gwen knows that I’ve been training and decided I needed a few extra shirts to train in. She also threatened to have Arthur throw me in the stocks if I didn’t let her make them for me.” Merlin said blushing.

“Well, I’m glad you’re taking this seriously. As often as you are out, it worries my heart too much to think you only have your natural gifts to rely on.” Gaius said.

“Are there any remedies or anything you need delivered tomorrow evening? I’m going to the lower town and I can deliver them if you need.”

“No, nothing of the sort. I do, however, have a list of herbs I need refilled. Could you fetch them in the morning?”

“Sure. I’ll let Arthur know and as long as I stay close to the walls, I don’t think he’ll send an escort with me. He’s been on edge about letting me out of his site outside the citadel since our last encounter with…with  _ him _ .” Merlin said trailing off touching his face subconsciously. He shook his head, “Anyway, I’m going to turn in so I can get an early start.” Merlin smiled and turned to go to bed.


	13. Where is he?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Arthur goes spare trying to find Merlin who disappeared while gathering herbs for Gaius. Warning: Torture, drug induced sleep, unwanted touching.

When Merlin had told Arthur that he had to gather some more herbs for Gaius, he actually thought nothing of it. He told Merlin to be back in the afternoon for his council meetings, but he hadn’t shown up. It was almost dark now and no one had seen him since he went out the city gates. Arthur’s hair was sticking up all over his head because he kept running his fingers through it watching the courtyard below for any sign of his return. 

“Come on, Merlin. Where are you?” he muttered to himself. A knock came at his door and his stomach dropped. “Enter.” He said. It was Gwaine. His face fell. If Gwaine was here, then he hadn’t seen him either. No. No this could not be happening.

“Sire.” Gwaine said tensely. “Your presence is needed in the audience chamber.” Arthur nodded and the two walked in silence. When he got there, he found his council and the Knights of the Round Table. Corbett was in the center of the room holding something. It was Merlin’s jacket and neckerchief. The normal blue fabric was stained. Arthur let out a harsh breath and put his face in his hand. “Did no one follow him?” Arthur asked before he could stop himself. “Everyone has been keeping an eye on him this long, he goes out on his own to do an everyday chore, and now he’s just gone?” 

“Sire, I followed from a distance so as not to draw attention. I don’t know what happened. I came to and these,” he gestured to the clothes, “were on the ground and he was gone.” Corbett said. “There was also this,” Corbett handed him a note and showed them a dart as well. He had been knocked out. The note read  _ He is mine now.  _

“Tomorrow morning, first light, take whoever you need. Find him.” Arthur said unwilling to trust his voice anymore. The Knights simply nodded and left. Deep breaths, Arthur, deep breaths, he told himself. That’s what they were always telling Merlin. How could he have been so stupid!? Arthur was so distracted by his thoughts he didn’t notice that the girl, Diana, had been in the back listening and left quickly, tears streaming down her face. 

********

Merlin hadn’t known what to expect, but this was not it. Gathering herbs was a typical chore. He did it all the time. How is it he managed to gather what he needed, still within sight of the city walls, and get captured? Just his luck. The one time he’s not being followed by his self-appointed bodyguards, or so he thought. Arthur was never going to let him hear the end of this. He didn’t even have a chance to defend himself. He was hit with a dart of some kind that knocked him out almost immediately. When he woke up chained in yet another dungeon, he was annoyed to say the least. At least he wasn’t blindfolded or anything this time. Just run of the mill hanging from his wrists by manacles. He looked around to see if anyone else was with him. No one. Well, guess that meant magic was an escape option then. He reached for his magic but couldn’t feel it. They must have used a potent drug to keep his brain addled enough he couldn’t use magic. Just, great. How long had he been here? A few hours? A day? More? He’d missed story-telling and his promise to get a drink with Gwaine. 

A door opened and he heard footsteps, though he couldn’t tell where they were coming from. His head was starting to ache. He hoped that meant the drug was wearing off. Instead of seeing anyone, a hand gripped his hair tilting his head back and pouring something down his throat. He tried to spit it out but a hand clasped over his face forcing him to swallow. He passed out again. Wondering how long whoever was keeping him planned on keeping him drugged. 

When he woke again, it was light out. His wrists ached. He must have been asleep for an entire day. He wondered what had woke him this time. Then he heard it. A door had opened and closed somewhere and there were footsteps echoing in the room. His head was still swimming and he couldn’t focus. He leaned his head against his arm hoping to keep the room from spinning. He wasn’t sure what to expect when the door to where he was opened and someone walked through. But he wasn’t surprised. If he was being honest, the man did tell him that he was hunting him after all. Balin stood in front of him, grinning widely. Merlin rolled his eyes.

“Of course it’s you.” He said unable to mask his irritation.

“Of course. I did tell you I would get you, did I not? And now here you are. Don’t worry, your friends won’t find you. Well, not until I’m ready for them to find you. I’ve sent them a memento or two, covered in your blood of course so they know you didn’t just wander off.” 

“What is it you want exactly? You drug me and drag me out here gods know where. For what? Just so you can torture me again? Is that really something you enjoy so much?” Merlin can’t stop himself.

“Hmm. It’s not  _ just _ an enjoyable experience. It’s almost like a compulsion. I can’t stop until the task is completed.” Balin said, walking around the room. And coming to stop directly in front of Merlin. He could feel the man’s breath on his face. 

“There won’t be near as much enjoyment this time for you, I do know that. No one here to hear me scream except you. You can’t hurt those I care about so, get on with it already.” Merlin said, staring at the man. The man had a smirk worthy of Morgana. 

“I’d love to, but, I want to make sure you’re friends don’t interrupt us. So. I’m going to let them simmer for a little while longer. Which means, unfortunately for you, that you need to be quiet.” Balin held up a vial in front of Merlin’s face. He knew it was the drug and tried to back away tugging painfully at his wrists. Balin was quick though. He held Merlin’s head back and poured more of the drug down his throat. Merlin tried to fight, but he was still weak from the previous dose and hadn’t eaten in at least a day. When he succumbed to the darkness, his last thoughts were of Camelot. Hoping that he was being searched for. 

*******

It had been two days. Two days since Merlin’s bloody scarf and jacket were found and there was no sign of him. Arthur was unable to focus during council meetings and decided he was going to join the next search. He would not lose Merlin.

“Sire, I know he was a loyal servant-” Aggravaine started to say, but was cut off when Arthur raised his hand. 

“He’s more than a servant. I will not accept that he is gone. Tomorrow will be three days since he’s disappeared. I need to ride out at least one day and help the Knights. The councils can wait one day.” Arthur said and dismissed his Uncle. Aggravaine was clearly upset that Arthur was so focused on a servant. Arthur went to the Knights and told them to prepare for a long day as he would be accompanying them. That night, Arthur couldn’t sleep. He was too anxious. When morning came, he was already in his armor and walking out of the castle. The Knights were there as well, all looking like they had been missing sleep. They decided to head towards Cenred’s Kingdom and use every minute of daylight. The patrol was quiet. There were no words that could be said. Everyday Merlin was missing meant a day they might not find him alive. 

*******

A slap woke Merlin. He blinked slowly trying to remember what was going on. His head felt like it was being stabbed. The pain was intense. When he finally got his eyes open, he remembered what was going on. 

“Get on with it then.” Merlin groaned, resigning himself to his fate. Balin smiled and reached up caressing Merlin’s face. Merlin realized his shirt was missing then. Great. At least he has a couple new ones waiting for him. The man was admiring Merlin’s body. The scars were plentiful and colorful. So many littered his form, that Balin couldn’t stop himself from reaching out and tracing some of them. Caressing. Merlin tensed at the touch. It was cold and unfriendly. Not to mention unwanted. 

“You must have quite a colorful story to go with these…” Balin said, reaching up to grab Merlin’s face. Merlin just stared back. Determined to keep his mouth shut. Balin ran his hands over Merlin’s chest, causing him to involuntarily flinch and try to move away. But the man simply moved closer. Merlin spit in his face. This made Balin smile even more. Oh, no. Merlin saw as soon as he did it, it was the wrong move. The predatory gleam in his eyes brightened and it was frightening. Merlin did his best to school his features and bury his fear. He could not show this man his fear. He sure hoped this drug wore off soon so he could reach his magic. Balin went behind Merlin and grabbed something to wipe his face off. When he came back around to him he had a strange looking blade in his hand. Merlin half hoped a little blood loss would speed up getting the drug out of his system. Balin reached up and drug the blade painfully slowly over his face in the exact same place as his current scar from the man. Merlin flinched and gasped at the pain. He clenched his teeth determined not to cry out. The blood rushed down his face and chest. There. He felt a little of his magic. He just needs a little more to be able to get out of here. Balin admired his work for a moment before moving on. Merlin was much more defined than the last time they had encountered each other. Balin was trying to figure out where to go next. He placed his hand over Merlin’s heart. 

“Tell me. Does your heart belong to anyone?” Balin asked. Merlin knew he shouldn’t answer. He knew nothing good could come of it. 

“Why would you care?” 

“It does. I see that it does. I wonder how they would feel to see it carved from your chest?” Balin purred and began carving something. Merlin felt the pain and tried to hold in his cries, but it escaped his mouth anyway. He couldn’t see what it was that had been carved on him, but he knew that it would stay with him. He hoped that the others would be able to forgive him for being so foolish and managing to get captured. Again. He was having trouble seeing straight. The pain was intense and it was making it hard for him to focus. But he had to. Arthur needed him. He needed to protect his King. As long as Morgana was out there, Arthur was in danger. He reached for his magic. He needed to clear his head of this confounded drug. There. His magic stirred and rushed through him breaking his chains. He fell to the floor and landed on his hands and knees. Balin looked shocked. “How did you do that?” But when Merlin looked up, he knew the man had his answer. It was written all over his face. “You have magic,” He whispered. 

“I was born with it.” Merlin said through gritted teeth. He stood up doing his best to stay steady. 

“And yet you protect a Pendragon?” Balin asked, genuinely curious. 

“Yes.” Merlin answered and then turned to leave. He felt a sudden and sharp pain in his shoulder. He knew the man had thrown the dagger and that it was embedded in his shoulder. When Merlin had fallen to the floor after breaking his manacles, he’d grabbed one of his own hidden blades. And as soon as he felt the others blade sink into his shoulder, he didn’t even turn around; he launched his blade behind him and knew that it would hit its mark. When he heard the other man fall, he went over to him and pulled the blade from between his eyes. He hadn’t taken pleasure in killing the man, but at least now he could rest. He wiped the blade off and then headed out of the ruined building to find out where he was. 

When he made it outside it was at least midday. Wonderful. How long had he been missing? He could only imagine the chaos that had occurred when he hadn’t returned. He kept a blade in his hand as he wasn’t sure how safe he was. The other man’s dagger was still in his shoulder. He couldn’t risk removing it yet. He had no way to patch it up. Merlin reached out with his magic to see what was nearby. He breathed a sigh of relief when he sensed a Camelot patrol. At the same time, though, he’d sensed bandits closing in on them. He tried to run and stumbled a lot; bloodloss affecting his coordination more than normal. He was so close. But the bandits were closer. The Knights were good, but they were outnumbered at least three to one. He heard the fighting before he saw it. When he got close he saw it was all his friends. Those who knew of his magic. He stumbled the rest of the way towards them and blasted the remaining bandits back. When the Knights saw their enemies blasted back the all swiveled around looking for him. Before anyone could reach him though he fell to the ground. Unable to stand anymore. He heard his name called but wasn’t able to respond. Someone was there grabbing his face and trying to get him to open his eyes. He opened them and saw Gwaine worriedly calling his name. 

“’S alright. ‘E can’t hurt me ‘nymore. I killed him.” Merlin mumbled before passing out.

*******

The Knights were all on edge. When the bandits attacked they thought they were doing well enough, but knew they were outnumbered. As they stood back to back, a blast of energy threw the remaining bandits back. Only one person they knew would defend them like that. When their eyes found Merlin, he was collapsing to the ground blood covering his chest and face and a dagger sticking out of his shoulder. Gwaine was the first to him. Then Percival, then Arthur. Merlin had stayed conscious long enough to tell them that the man who did this was dead, but then he passed out. Percival picked Merlin up and carried him over to the group who had rounded up the horses. He decided the best bet was to leave the dagger in place for now. He wrapped the other wounds as best he could before putting him on the horse with Gwaine. Gwaine was careful not to jostle the dagger and they tore off towards Camelot. It had taken them half the day to get this far. They all hoped that they could make it back in time. He was losing a lot of blood. When they finally saw the city walls, they didn’t slow. They rode fast through the citadel. When the people saw Merlin, they all gasped, some cried, but they quickly moved out of the way. Once they got to the steps of the castle, they all jumped down. Percival quickly grabbed Merlin from Gwaine and all but ran him to Gaius. When they got him there and laid him on the patient cot, Gaius shouted out orders of more blankets, fresh water, and bandages. Gaius examined the blade stuck in Merlin’s shoulder to see if it was safe to remove. When he determined it was, he had Arthur pull it out, as he was closest. As soon as it was out, blood started pouring out. Gaius quickly handed a bandage to Arthur to put pressure on it. Once the bleeding slowed, Gaius cleaned it and started stitching it closed. He covered it with a fresh bandage and rolled him over so he could clean his face and get a good look at his chest. The wound on Merlin’s face was in the same place as his previous scar. Once Gaius had it cleaned, he stitched that up as well. There was nothing he could do for the carving on his chest. He washed it as best he could and then placed a salve and a bandage on top of it. Then he opened his mouth and poured a pain reliever in and forced him to swallow. As soon as this happened, much like last time, a wave of relief washed over them all. They all let out a breath they hadn’t realized they were holding. Even Gaius. Gaius sat down hard on a chair next to the cot. 

“I am getting too old for this.” Gaius said, leaning back on his chair. 

“He’s going to be fine, right?” Arthur asked.

“Yes, Sire. He will recover. You should go rest yourselves. I will send someone for you as soon as he wakes up.” Gaius says to the group. 

“I’ll stay with him.” Gwaine says. Gaius had picked up something between the two, though Merlin tried to keep it secret. 

“Very well. But no one else. You all look terrible, so go wash up and rest. He won’t enjoy seeing any of you exhausted because of him.”

“Gwaine, you should wash and change as well.” Arthur urges. “I’ll wait with him while you go get cleaned up.“

The Knights all nodded and headed out. Arthur looked lost. Here he was, yet again. Merlin lying bloody and injured on a table. 

“Sire. Something you should know. Merlin never had a chance to prevent this. The drug used on him was very potent. I wanted you to know that so you understand that he wasn’t given the opportunity to use the skills you have been teaching him,” Gaius said, watching his King’s face. 

“Thank you, Gaius. I appreciate that.” Gwaine had come back having quickly washed and changed so he could be back as soon as possible. Anxiety written all over his face though he tried to mask it. Arthur put a hand on the other man’s shoulder. 

“As soon as he wakes up, send for me. I mean it.” Arthur said sternly. 

“Of course. I don’t imagine he’ll want to relive what happened more than once. Lancelot is writing up the report from the patrol today, He should have it to you shortly.” 

“Gwaine. He’s going to be fine. He’s alive. He found us in time.” Arthur said and patted Gwaine’s arm and left. Gwaine came over and pulled a chair up right next to Merlin. He reached up and brushed the hair back from the raven-haired warlock’s face. Merlin leaned into the touch. He didn’t wake up, just nuzzled the hand. Gwaine smiled at the reaction. 

Gwaine had fallen asleep leaning on the cot next to Merlin’s hand. He woke up to a hand in his hair. When he looked up Merlin was looking at him smiling. 

“Morning.” Merlin said, voice raspy. Gwaine grabbed a cup of water and helped him drink. “Thanks. I don’t remember the last time I had something to drink that wasn’t meant to knock me out.” 

“Merls, don’t say anything yet. I won’t be able to keep from asking what happened and the Princess will have my head if I make you tell it more than once. So, just stay awake.” Gwaine ran to the door and grabbed a passing servant and sent them to tell the King that Merlin was awake. Within minutes the King and the Knights of the Round Table were all in the physician’s chambers. Gwaine had helped Merlin sit up against some pillows. 

“Hey guys” Merlin said, seeing everyone come in. He smiled at them reassuringly. He was sure it didn’t go over well since he had stitches running down his face. 

“Good to see you awake and feeling better, Merlin” Arthur said, pulling up a stool and sitting next to Gwaine who refused to move from his side. 

“Yeah, glad to be waking up here and not chained in a cell again. Honestly that’s getting a little old.” Merlin said, chuckling a little. 

“Merlin what have I said about you trying to be funny?” Arthur asked.

“I shouldn’t.” Merlin said, smiling. 

“Yeah. You shouldn’t.” Arthur said smiling back at his friend. “So, do you want to tell us what happened?”

“Want to? Not really, but I see I don’t really have a choice. Um, I was just outside the wall gathering herbs, they’re probably still there where I dropped them, but, er, I felt something strange. Can’t really describe it. I figured out later that it was a dart or something. Seems to be a popular method for slavers to catch people. Same thing happened to us with Jarl. Anyway I came too and I was hanging by my hands from some manacles. The drug was still pretty active when I woke up so I couldn’t reach my magic.” Merlin took a breath. “When I woke, he forced me to swallow something that kept me asleep or knocked out. He kept me drugged like that for a long while. At least a full two days. Anyway, when he finally woke me, and let me stay awake, he started talking like we’d left off on a conversation. I wasn’t surprised or mad or scared. I was…exasperated. He wanted to talk and to taunt me I guess. The drug was still in me so I may have not been able to stop myself talking. Honestly if I could have kept my mouth shut, it might have saved a bit of trouble. Sorry, Arthur. One day I might be able to eventually not talk back. I’ll work on it. He, uh, he” Merlin cleared throat, “He had taken my shirt and then started to, ah, touch all my scars.” A shiver ran through his body remembering the unwanted touch. “Anyway he did this to my face first. But he was interested in talking. He hardly spoke the last time he had me chained up, but this time, he would not shut up. When I didn’t give him the answer he wanted, or acknowledge his questions he started carving something in my chest. I don’t know what it was, or is, I guess. I think by that point I’d had enough blood loss that the drug was enough out of my system I could reach my magic. I broke the manacles and was able to grab one of my blades when I fell since he hadn’t searched me. He’d seen my magic though. And he started demanding to know why I would protect a Pendragon. I didn’t answer him. I had finally got enough strength to try and leave and I just turned my back on him. As soon as I did he threw the dagger in my shoulder. I had thrown mine as well, hitting him between the eyes. I made it outside and reached out with my magic and found there was a patrol not far, but a group of bandits was closing in fast. I tried to hurry. When I got there I was able to blast the remaining bandits away before passing out. It was strange.” Merlin said looking at his hands. “Every other time I’ve come across him or thought of him, the fear was overwhelming and suffocating. But, this time, I don’t know. I just wasn’t afraid of him anymore.” 

“It was a good thing you managed to stumble upon the patrol when you did.” Gaius said. “Any longer and you would have lost too much blood.” They all let that sink in. 

“But I did find them. And they got me back here in time. I’m fine. Honestly. Just very tired.” Merlin said looking at his mentor and father figure. Gaius smiled weakly back at him. 

“You should rest for a few days. Wait until the stitches are ready to come out before wandering the castle or citadel. You’ve worried a lot of people disappearing like that. I’ve already had Gwen go and tell your friends Diana and Ada that you were back and you would be fine in time. You’re going to need to go see them all soon or the whole lower town is going to try storming the castle to visit.” Arthur said. Merlin just nodded chuckling. He could feel his eyes closing already. Arthur leaned forward and said something to Gwaine and then the Knights in a low tone and they all started to leave. 

“Merlin?” Gwaine said tentatively.

“Hmm?” He said drifting off. 

“Do you want me to stay, or-“ Gwaine was asking but Merlin cut him off before he could finish his sentence. 

“Stay. Please.” 

“Ok.” And then Merlin was asleep. 


	14. Lamia

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Arthur draws attention to Merlin's abilities as a healer, but a mission to assist a village that has many who have fallen prey to an unknown illness causes more harm to the young warlock than he expected.

It was a week before Gaius took the stitches out. During that time, Arthur had a guard at the physician’s door to prevent Merlin from attempting to do any kind of chore until he’d fully healed. Which meant time to study with Gaius. He was learning a lot as an apprentice and hoped one day he could be half the healer that his mentor was. When patients came through the room, Gaius insisted that Merlin treat them and provide the remedy. The Knights came by occasionally to see how he was doing. When they saw he was treating patients, they felt the need to inform their King. Arthur came by and observed one day claiming to want to hide out from his council meetings and no one would suspect to check with the physician. He watched as Merlin skillfully and caringly attended to each patient that came in while Gaius watched and provided input when asked. At the end of the day, Gaius had taken Merlin’s last stitches out. They put an ointment on them to help reduce the scarring. 

“Merlin, you can resume your normal duties tomorrow. I expect whenever your needed Gaius will send word to me.” Arthur said and bid them goodnight.

“Hmm. Why do you think he was in here all day?” Merlin asked.

“I have my suspicions, but who can say for sure.” Gaius responded. Merlin rolled his eyes. 

“Alright. Well I’m going to get some rest. Who knows how much Arthur is going to have me doing tomorrow.” 

During the night, Gaius was woken as many villagers had fallen ill with a sweating sickness. Merlin assisted where he could. There were at least a half dozen who had fallen ill. When dawn came, both men were very tired. Merlin left Gaius to go fetch Arthur’s breakfast. When he got to the kitchen Diana hugged him so tight he almost couldn’t breathe. Then she hit him in the arm and said it was for making her worry so much. The others beamed at them. Apparently the sentiment was shared.

When he got to Arthur’s chambers, he walked in and set the tray down at the table and went to open the curtains. He managed to trip on a shirt on his way to the curtains and landed hard on the floor and groaned before getting back up. When he managed to get the curtains opened, he turned to find Arthur watching him. 

“Merlin, you look terrible.” 

“Yes, Sire. Thanks for that. We were woken up sometime after midnight as several people have come down with an illness. We were up treating them most of the night.” He said and then started to gather up the laundry he had tripped over. 

“Does Gaius need your assistance, or can he manage?” 

“He should be fine. We have those who came in stable, but if there are too many more, then he might need me again.” Merlin was piling the clothes in a basket and putting Arthur’s training clothes on the changing screen since he had training first thing this morning. Arthur nodded. Merlin helped him dress and then waited while he ate. Once he was done, he strapped on the armor and they headed down to the training field together. Merlin kept his eyes on the ground not wanting to look up and see what expressions people had regarding his appearance. But by doing this, he missed seeing his friends and had no time to react before he was thrown over someone’s shoulder and ran around the field. Arthur couldn’t contain his laughter and watched as Percival ran Merlin past the others. Merlin was a very vivid red by the time Percival stopped and put him down. All the Knights were laughing and happy to see him outside with them all again. Arthur noticed Lancelot had put himself between Gwaine and Merlin and kept giving Gwaine a glare. Huh. Guess he didn’t have to worry too much about protecting Merlin from Gwaine. Lancelot was doing well enough. 

“I’ve got an idea for today’s training.” Arthur said, bringing their attention back to him. 

“What’s that, Princess?” Gwaine asked.

“We’re going to practice some knife skills, non-dominant hands.” Arthur said garnering some groans from the Knights. Merlin just grinned. “Merlin, I want you to throw three daggers from each hand and then we’ll have everyone see if they can tell which is which.” 

“So, do you want three at one target, three at another or each one a different target?” Merlin asked, taking his jacket off and coming to the center of the field. 

“Do three on one.” Arthur directed. Merlin pulled out his blades. Again, no one quite saw where they had been. Merlin decided to do his left hand first, then his right. All six blades went slicing through the air landing right next to each other in the center of the targets. He then turned to look at Arthur. 

“Now, who can tell me, after watching that, which is Merlin’s dominant hand? Anyone? Perhaps you need to see them up close? Or maybe another demonstration? Merlin go ahead and do the same thing only slower.” Arthur directed. Merlin rolled his eyes and retrieved the blades and walked back to the center of the field. 

He hadn’t noticed when they had some more onlookers. Aggravaine watched from his window, Gwen and another woman watched from a gathering crowd of townspeople. Merlin then threw each blade a little slower, and this time at six different targets. Each one dead center. An applause broke out from those gathered and Merlin turned so quick he tripped and fell. This caused some laughter to break out and Merlin turned as red as his shirt. He quickly got back up and retrieved his blades putting them back where they belonged and pulled his jacket on. Merlin then went to stand nearly behind Arthur, who just smiled crookedly at him.

“You know I don’t like being put on the spot. What are you playing at?” He asked in a low voice.

“I’m the King, Merlin. I don’t have to explain myself to you.” He said bumping the younger man’s shoulder. When the crowd dispersed, Arthur looked back to the gathered Knights expectantly. “Well? What is the answer? Which is his dominant hand? Anyone except Leon, Percival, Lancelot, Gwaine, Elyan, Corbett, and Eoin.” Silence. “Merlin, which is your dominant hand?”

“My right.” He answered.

“Now, the goal is to be able to throw even one dagger with your non-dominant hand as smoothly as your dominant hand.” Arthur stepped forward and demonstrated. His movements weren’t as fluid, but he landed a blade from each hand in the center. Once the training began in earnest the crowd dispersed. After an hour a servant came running out to the training fields and came up to Merlin and whispered something hurriedly to him. He turned and ran up the steps into the castle.  _ Arthur, more within the castle have fallen ill, Gaius needs me. _ Arthur glanced at him as he disappeared up the steps. He returned to the training and split the newer recruits up with his Knights of the Round Table. After another hour, Merlin had not returned. Once training was over Arthur went to change and attempt to get out of his armor on his own. While in his room, Gwen showed up. She laughed at him and then proceeded to assist him. There was a woman standing at the door that Gwen had left open. 

“Arthur, this is my friend, Mary. Her village is in need of some assistance. I told her you would hear her out.” 

“Of course. If it is within my power, I will help.” He said gesturing for Mary and Gwen to sit down. 

“Our village is small, we have no physician. But, several of our men have fallen ill. We don’t know what is causing it. It’s not a sickness that we’ve seen before. I don’t mean to trouble you with our issues, Sire.” Mary tried apologizing.

“There’s no need to apologize. I will speak with our physician. I do know that he has been very busy lately as a sweating sickness broke out. Stay the night and get some rest. I will have some Knights ready to ride out with you tomorrow.” Arthur said and got up to go see Gaius. Knowing how busy Gaius was, he had a feeling he would be sending Merlin. He was interested to see how Merlin handled this task. When he got to the physician’s chambers there were many more cots and people being watched over and tended to. Merlin was sweating and sitting on a bench eating an apple while watching a nearby patient. He turned when he heard the door open. 

“Gaius. How are things going? Any progress?” Arthur asked.

“Sire. Well, as you can see the sickness has spread. I think it’s contained now, but those who are sick need to be supervised and medicine administered every few hours.” Gaius responded.

“I see. We have had a request from an outlying village for a physician. There’s a sickness that broke out and they can’t seem to identify it. I don’t suppose you’re able to go?” Arthur asked, already knowing the answer.

“No, Sire. I cannot leave.” 

“What about Merlin? I watched him treating patients the other day so I know he’s fairly competent as your apprentice. Do you think he would be able to sort this out on his own?” Arthur asked Gaius while Merlin simply looked over raising an eyebrow worthy of Gaius at him. 

“I should think so. He’s been my apprentice for some time now. If the illness is straightforward he should be able to prescribe a remedy.” 

“Very well. Merlin, be ready in the morning to ride out. You’ll be escorted by the Round Table. Try to treat as quickly as you can so you can be back before too long. You’ve missed a good almost two weeks of training and I don’t want you getting rusty.” Merlin just nodded and gave him a small smile of thanks. 

When Merlin was getting ready to go, Gwaine came by to see him before they met the others. Merlin just grinned at his friend. 

“Something you needed,  _ Sir _ Gwaine?” He asked flirtatiously. 

“Not particularly, no. Just wanted to see if you needed any help carrying anything.” He said grinning back moving in close to him. 

“Mmm. Is that so?” Merlin pulled Gwaine in placing his hand behind his head and kissing him. This caused the other to grin into the kiss. Gwaine put his hands on Merlin’s hips and pulled against his body. The two were caught up in the moment and hadn’t noticed anyone else in the room. Gaius cleared his throat causing Merlin to jump back. Gwaine chuckled. 

“Come on Merlin, don’t want to keep the others waiting.” He said. 

“Sorry about that Gaius.” Merlin said, smiling. 

“It’s quite alright. It is good to see you happy. You don’t let yourself be happy often enough.” Gaius gave Merlin a hug and sent him off. When he got to the courtyard the others were waiting on him. Including Arthur. 

“Merlin, nice of you to show up.” Arthur said grinning, knowing what had held him up. “Here, you’re going to need this.” And he handed Merlin a sealed letter. 

“What’s this?” he asked curiously.

“Merlin, you are hereby appointed as acting Physician.” He said loud enough that everyone nearby could hear. Merlin looked shocked. He just stared.

“Whoo! Way to go Merlin!” Gwaine yelled, clearly proud of him. Merlin blushed at the attention and Gwen came over and gave him a big hug. 

“Thanks, Arthur.” Merlin mumbled before turning around and going to get on his horse. The group rode out, not before Lancelot had pulled Merlin in and ruffled his hair. This caused the group to laugh and smile. 

When they arrived at the village, Mary ran forward to meet a man, embracing him. Gwen was right behind doing the same. Merlin heard the man asking for Gaius, so he came forward to meet him and introduce himself. The man just stared at Merlin. 

“We need a physician, not a  _ boy _ .” The man said.

“His name,” Elyan said defensively, coming up and putting a hand on Merlin’s shoulder, “is Merlin.”

“King Arthur, himself, has appointed him acting physician.” Gwen added. 

“Where are they?” Merlin asked. The man led Merlin to one of the houses where the sick were laid out on tables. Once inside, he set to work examining each of the men. Gwaine had come by to see how he was doing, but Merlin hadn’t even noticed he was there. Gwaine just smiled at this and went off to join the other Knights. 

“What’s the matter, Gwaine? Is he not paying attention to you?” Leon mocked. 

“You know, every time I think I’ve figured him out, he does something else that astounds me. Have you seen him treat patients before? I forget sometimes that he studied medicine for so long under Gaius. Has he been an apprentice this whole time he’s been in Camelot?” He asked.

“I think so. Gaius was his guardian when he arrived. So he studied with him when he wasn’t taking care of Arthur.” Leon said. 

“I don’t think I’ve had an interest in anything that ever lasted that long.” Gwaine said, scratching his chin. 

“Are you saying that may have changed recently?” Eoin teases. Gwaine just winks at him before going back taking care of his horse. The others just laughed at this. 

Gwen had gone in to check on Merlin as he had been there for hours and night was falling. She wanted to make sure he was eating something. When she went in, Merlin was leaned down over one of the men with his hand on his chest and his eyes closed.

“Merlin?” she called. He looked up at her.

“Gwen, hey. Something you need?” He asked while moving on to the next man and doing similar movements.

“Merlin, you haven’t eaten all day. You need to take a break and eat. You won’t do anyone any good if you’re exhausted.” 

“Hm.” Was all he got out having closed his eyes leaning over the other man already. Gwen could see she wasn’t getting anywhere so she went out to the Knights.

“Can one of you please go and drag Merlin out here so he can eat something? He hasn’t eaten all day and I can’t get his attention to make him take a break.” She said sitting down with them around a fire. 

“I’ll go.” Lancelot said standing up and pushing Gwaine back to his seat. “He needs to eat, not another distraction.” This caused a round of snickering and Gwaine feigned shock. Lancelot went into the house where Merlin was working, seeing the medicine satchel open and some notes next to it, though he couldn’t read them since they were written in runes. He didn’t know Merlin could read runes. “Hey, Merlin. Come outside for a few minutes. You need a break so you can eat and build up your energy.”

“Mm.” Merlin got out while still looking over one of the men. Lancelot sighed. He put his hands on each side of Merlin’s arms and guided him from the house to the fire where everyone was sitting. Merlin had managed to grab his notes before being led out. When he got to the fire he was sat down and started scratching out more notes. 

“Merlin?” Eoin called. 

“Hmm?” was the only response he received. 

“Merlin what is that you’re writing?” Eoin continued looking over his shoulder at the writing. 

“Oh, uh, just notes on what I’ve observed so far.” 

“Merlin, you’re writing in runes.” Lancelot said, drawing the attention of the other Knights. 

“Yes? Is that so unusual?” Merlin asked.

“Merlin, mate, how many languages do you know?” Gwaine asked.

“Erm. Well. A fair few I suppose?” He responded vaguely.

“Humor us, Merlin. How many would you consider a ‘fair few’?” Percival asked.

“I dunno.” He huffed, annoyed to be interrupted. “Maybe five or six I guess? Maybe a few more, I’m not sure. Languages have always been pretty easy for me. Most medical records are in either runes or Latin or something like that. I’ve seen some in something Gaius called Gaelic. That was tricky. Gaius has taught me a bit of Sidhe and troll when we were trying to help sort out a few issues. Mum taught me Welsh when I was little. Used to sing lullabies to me in it.” When he looked up from his notes, they were all staring at him. “What? Is there something on my face?” he reached up to see if he’d gotten ink or something on his nose. 

“Merlin, do you understand how unusual that is?” Leon asked. 

“If I did I wouldn’t be asking why you lot are looking at me like I sprouted wings or something.” He responded.

“Merlin, most servants, let alone peasants, don’t know how to read. And you’ve picked up more than one language. How is it you have time to do any of this?” Corbett asked, kind of awed.

“Oh. Uh. I guess I hadn’t thought of that. Er, I have spent my fair share of nights staying up researching various things. Sometimes I went a few days without more than a few hours of sleep trying to find an answer to an issue we were dealing with. I don’t think I slept more than five hours in as many days when Uther married that troll.” Merlin shivered remembering that time. 

“That is incredible, Merlin. Are there any other hidden talents we should be aware of?” Elyan asked. Merlin just shrugged and kept writing. The Knights and Gwen just stared at him. Mary and her husband had heard this all as well. It was shocking that a servant knew so much. Gwen stole an apple out of Gwaine’s hand and put it in Merlin's, taking his notes away, with some protesting. 

“Fine.” He said and took a bite and reached back for his notes. Gwen gave him a scalding look causing the others to chuckle at Merlin. He rolled his eyes and hurriedly ate the apple. Once the apple was only a core, he tossed it in the fire, and reached for his notes yet again. When Gwen handed them back, he headed back inside. To try a few more things.

“Do you think Arthur knows that he is fluent in other languages?” Leon asked.

“We didn’t know, what makes you think the King would know.” Lancelot said sheepishly. Merlin was deep in thought with his eyes closed over one of the patients when Gwen came in again. 

“Any idea what’s causing it, Merlin?” She asked. 

“No. There’s something at work here that I don’t understand.” He said thoughtfully. 

“Are you suggesting sorcery?” The man came in and asked. 

“Maybe. I can’t be sure. I need to get back to Gaius. Together we should be able to sort out the cause. I’m sorry.” Merlin told him. When they all went to bed for the night, the group had decided to take shifts checking on Merlin to make sure he was getting some rest too. The night wore on with no improvement from the patients. Their breathing wasn’t getting any better. There was a noise outside that caught Merlin’s attention. It almost sounded like a hiss. He got up from his vigil and went outside to investigate. The sound came again, so Merlin followed where he thought it came from, around the side of the house he was in. When he came around the corner he ran into Gwaine. Literally. At least this time when they fell, Merlin landed on top of Gwaine. 

“Well, Merlin. If you wanted some attention, all you had to do was ask. No need to pin me to the ground." He said, winking at him. 

“Sorry, I thought I heard something and was checking it out. Sorry I haven’t been much fun.” Merlin said, making no move to get up. 

“It’s fine. Your skills were needed and I didn’t want to cause any distractions. You know, I didn’t think there were any more secrets I could find out about you. Turns out you’re more of a mystery than I could have imagined.” He said touching Merlin’s chin. 

“I forget sometimes that the things I know or can do aren’t typical. It’s a little embarrassing when you all point it out in a group. How different I am.” Merlin said, a little sad.

“Hey, it’s not a bad thing. It’s all really great. You’re quite amazing, you know?” Gwaine tells him. Merlin just shrugs. 

“I guess. I don’t know any different. I’ve always enjoyed learning and when I arrived in Camelot, there were so many books and so many things to learn that I might have gone a little overboard, I suppose.” 

“You’re adorable when you’re being modest.” Gwaine said and kissed him lightly. 

“Alright you two, break it up.” Elyan said, snickering. 

“Terrible timing, mate.” Gwaine said while Merlin stood up reaching a hand out to help him up. 

“Hey, it was my turn to come check on him. Not my fault. But, since he seems to be doing fine, I’m going back to sleep. Goodnight.” Elyan said and walked off.

“What did he mean it was his turn to check on me?” Merlin asked, confused.

“Merlin, you’ve been watching after your patient’s non-stop since we got here. You took a half hour break when Gwen had Lance drag you out to eat. Dawn is not far off. You haven’t slept yet. After you ate an apple and returned to working, we decided to take shifts checking on you.”

“Fair enough. So why are you out here then, if Elyan said it was his turn to check on me?” Merlin asked, smirking playfully.

“I wasn’t out here to spy or watch you work, I swear. I simply answered a call of nature and wanted to peek in on you before going back to sleep.” Gwaine said. Noticing Merlin’s smile lessen he reached up and put a hand on his cheek and pulled him in brushing their lips together. Gwaine felt Merlin’s tension ease away a little. “You should get an hour or two of sleep too. I need you fully functional tomorrow for the trip back.” Gwaine said and walked off. Merlin just shook his head and went back into the house. Hopefully Gaius had some idea. When Merlin got back inside, he decided to send his notes to Gaius so he could look them over before they got back to Camelot. Merlin grabbed a spare piece of paper and started copying down what he wanted to keep with him and then wrote a note to Gaius and folded the others together. Taking a look around to make sure no one was watching him, he put the papers in his hand and thought of Gaius, and they were gone. He decided to lay down and rest for an hour like Gwaine suggested and then check on his patients again.

******

Gaius was sitting at the table after being up most of the night treating those with the sweating sickness. He expected another day and they would all be recovered. A letter landed in front of him with a small pop sound. Gaius opened it up and sighed. How many times had he asked that boy to write to him in English or Latin? He could read the runes, but he needed a magnifying glass and had to concentrate on it. He was too tired now to make it out. He went to sleep for a few hours so he could be of more use the next day. 

*******

A few hours of sleep did wonders for Merlin. Well, a few. He slept for almost two hours before waking to check on his patients. No improvements. When the sun came up he had been sitting there writing more notes. He couldn’t remember if he’d sent Gaius notes in Latin or runes. Gaius often complained to him about his using runes. While he was writing he hadn’t noticed anyone come in behind him. Someone cleared their throat, causing him to look up. It was Mary and her husband.

“I’m sorry I wasn’t able to help them. There’s a chance I can find the answer in Camelot, though.” He told them, thinking they wanted an update.

“Actually, we wanted to apologize. It was rude to think you weren’t skilled enough or knowledgeable enough to assist us. We heard you with the Knights last night. Do you really know more than one language?” She asked curiously.

“Yes. Sometimes the answers we, Gaius and I, would look for, weren’t in English or Latin. It makes things easier to be able to read multiple languages.” Merlin said.

“Well, it has truly been a pleasure to meet you Merlin. We look forward to seeing you again.” They said and left. Merlin started putting his things away and headed outside to see the others near ready to go. Merlin went over to Mary.

“Here. This is a tincture that helps stimulate their blood flow. Try to give each man a few drops every couple of hours.” Merlin said, handing a vial to Mary. When he walked over to the others, they were in the midst of a debate.

“It can’t hurt for us to split up.” Lancelot was saying.

“What’s going on?” Merlin asked. 

“You, Percival, Leon, Gwaine, Elyan, and Gwen will go on to Camelot and get Gaius and come back here. Corbett, Eoin, and myself will stay here to assist in any way we can. All the patients you had were men and there is still work that needs taken care of that they can’t handle on their own.” Lancelot told him.

“Make sense. Is everyone ready to go then?” He asked looking at the others. They all nodded and mounted up to head out. Lancelot stopped Merlin just before he could follow. 

“Were you able to determine what caused the illness?” he asked. 

“No. I’m not sure what’s causing it. I tried healing them, with and without magic, but no luck. I sent word to Gaius last night so hopefully, if he’s not too exhausted, he’ll be able to get an answer and work out how to heal them. Though I don’t know if my notes were the right ones.”

“How do you mean?” Lancelot asks.

“Well…I prefer to write in runes. It’s easier for me than almost anything else. But, Gaius hates it. It requires a magnifying glass and extreme concentration. I usually write stuff out for him in Latin but I didn’t do that last night.” Merlin said trailing off at the end. 

“I’m sure he’ll figure it out and speak to Arthur.” Lancelot said. 

“Arthur! Why didn’t I think to send it to him! I keep forgetting how aware of everything he is now. If we get the chance while we’re heading back, I’ll try to send word to him too.”

“Though, maybe, stick with a language we all know, yeah? Arthur is a King, so he knows a fair few, but, I know that he would not understand runes. You don’t want to make his head explode do you?” Lancelot said, smiling at him. 

“No I do not.” Merlin chuckled. “Stay safe Lance. I’ll see you in a few days.” They hugged and then Merlin walked off and got on his horse to catch up to the others. It would take them at least a full day to a day and a half to reach Camelot. He hoped that wouldn’t be too long. 

Toward late afternoon, they came across some bandits. Thinking to skirt by them, since they hadn’t noticed the group from Camelot, until they saw a girl in the midst being pushed around. The Knights all reacted and jumped into the fray to try and protect the girl. Merlin and Gwen stayed back, letting the Knights do what they do best. When the fighting was over Percival was cradling the girl who appeared to have fainted. Merlin came over to her quickly to see if she needed any kind of medical attention. As he touched her arm, her eyes came open and she screamed. Merlin flinched back at this. 

“It’s alright, I just need to check to see if you were injured.” He told her in a soothing voice. She tried to scramble away from him like he was the one who was hurting her. 

“It’s ok.” Percival told her and helped her up and guided her toward their horses. The others all followed suit not giving Merlin or Gwen a second look.

“That was strange, don’t you think?” Gwen asked him as they followed behind the others. Merlin just nodded to her. 

They rode a little further and decided to make camp for the night. He noticed the Knights all hovering around the girl. He and Gwen set up the camp and prepared some food. When they passed it out, Gwen tried to give some to the girl, but she wouldn’t take it. She put the bowl next to her in case she changed her mind. 

“What’s your name? Mine’s Gwen.” 

“Lamia” she replied softly.

“Lamia. You should eat Lamia.” Gwen told her and turned away. Percival still had a protective hold on her. The Knights all kept close to her. Whenever Merlin came near her, she would flinch and try to get away from him. Like being near him was painful or something. The other men could see this and started to push Merlin away from them, as well as her. He was getting very confused. They needed to get back to Camelot but now they had an extra person and she was preventing him from doing the work he had been sent to do. He went to gather some firewood to try and clear his mind. Surely Percival and the others weren’t intentionally trying to show him so much anger. It was in their eyes. It was the same look as the nightmares he used to have about how they would react to finding out about his magic. When Merlin was walking back he saw Lamia leaning in to Percival like she was trying to kiss him. But when he was spotted the two went back to the center of camp glaring at him. He sighed. What was happening? He tried to reach out to talk to Gwaine in his head, but he couldn’t. The connection felt wrong, like something was muddling the other man’s thoughts. That was disconcerting. He sat next to Gwen not wanting to be near the others at the moment. Gwen smiled at him, knowing something was wrong. 

The next day the Knights had said they were going to go the opposite direction of Camelot. 

“We have a duty to the people to get them help” Merlin argued. 

“Silence! You are not a Knight! You’re nothing but a servant!” Leon seethed. 

“Merlin’s right. We need to get back to Camelot!” Gwen yelled back, trying to take some of the anger off of her best friend.

“Stay out of this Gwen.” Elyan told her. She went to stand next to Merlin unsure of what to do. They mounted up with the others and continued behind. 

“Arthur is going to come looking for us. We need to make sure he can find us.” Merlin told her.

“I know.” Gwen said. The pair stopped a ways behind the others and Gwen tore off a piece of her tunic and tied it to a branch. They then caught up to the others, who hadn’t even known they had fallen behind. 

When they stopped that night, Leon and Gwaine had gotten in a fight over who was going to give Lamia water. Gwaine’s sword sliced Leon’s arm. Merlin was giving Leon some stitches who managed to be angrier than before. Still directing this all towards Merlin. Leon had continued to say angry and unwarranted comments about how useless Merlin was during this ordeal

“Something is wrong with them.” Merlin said to Gwen.

“I know. But what can we do?”

“It’s like they're under a spell or something.” Merlin muttered.

“They never fight like this. It’s something to do with her, isn’t it?” Gwen asked.

“It makes sense. This all started when we found her.” Merlin said looking to the ground, feeling his fear and anxiety keenly. 

Merlin went to sleep that night without eating. He was too frustrated and stressed to be hungry. If the Knights were enchanted, then he needed to find a way to break the enchantment. But there was nothing he could do. It was similar to the villagers that he had treated. When morning came, and no one had woken them, everyone was worried. Elyan was on guard when they went to sleep, but the next guard had never been woken up. 

“Don’t worry,” Lamia said, “they’ll find your brother soon enough.” Gwen stared at her, shocked. True to her word, Leon and Percival had found him and were carrying Elyan back to the group. Merlin tried to examine him but was shoved back and fell to the ground. He hadn’t expected that. He landed on his hand and felt a small crack. He knew he had broken something in his hand. Leon was yelling. He refused to listen. 

“I know this area. There’s a place nearby you can tend to your friend.” Lamia said.

“Then that is where we will go.” Leon said.

“We need to get to Camelot.” Merlin said standing up and cradling his hand close to his body.

“No! You are not in charge. You can either come with us, or stay, but we will be going.” All Merlin and Gwen could do is follow. When they got close to a structure, it looked like it had been abandoned for a long time. 

“Percival, you have to stop this. It’s a trap. She’s got you under some kind of spell” Merlin said quietly to the larger man as they were at the back of the group. 

“You heard what Leon said. Stay or go. It’s your choice.” Percival said shoving him hard against the rocky wall. It wasn’t too hard of a shove, not hard enough to break anything at least. But Merlin knew he would be fairly bruised. He stayed behind and followed quietly. They made their way inside the structure and found a room to set Elyan down in. Lamia had disappeared at some point. Gwen sat down with her brother checking him over. Leon was instructing Gwaine to stay and guard Merlin, Elyan, and Gwen while he and Percival went to search for Lamia. They had been gone for a little while. 

“I’m gonna go try to find them.” Gwaine said.

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” Merlin asked him, concernedly.

“You trying to tell me my business?” Gwaine asked angrily coming towards Merlin. 

“No.” He said quietly, trying to hide the hurt this caused, and turned away. Gwaine then shoved past him josteling his broken hand and went out into the ruins to try to find the others. 

“It’s not your fault.” Gwen told him. 

“I know.” Merlin said, hiding his pain. 

“There’s something about you Merlin. Like she’s afraid of you. Why do you think you haven’t been affected?” Gwen asked thoughtfully.

“Maybe it’s because I’m not a Knight?” He replied.

“The villagers weren’t Knights.” 

“I don’t know. I don’t know why I haven’t been affected.” Merlin said, though he had a feeling it had to do with his magic. His hand was aching, bruised, and starting to swell. He needed to bandage it to set the bone back, but he couldn’t focus on that when his friends were in danger. A scream came out from the ruins. “Stay here” Merlin said, turning back to Gwen and then raced off to find out who had been hurt. After a few corridors he found Gwaine, standing, but only because a pillar was holding him up. Merlin lowered him to the ground carefully. Since he knew it was the same illness as the villagers, there was nothing he could do for him. He ran on and found Leon on the ground unconscious, with Percival nearby. Lamia was standing at the other end of the hall they were in watching Merlin. 

“You should not have hurt my friends.” He told her, and hurled a fireball at her.

“Your magic can’t harm me. I could have killed you anytime I wished.” She said.

“Well, then, what are you waiting for.” He taunted. She came after him but he had managed to use his magic to throw a sword in her gut. She fell over a fallen pillar and disappeared from his sight. He moved forward cautiously. Instead of the girl, a monster came up from the dark. It was twice as tall as Percival and had some sort of tentacles coming off of it. The creature screeched and charged after Merlin, who turned and ran trying to crash some of the ruins on it. The creature tore through the rubble and Merlin was thrown to the ground. Just then, Gwen came in and ran at the creature stabbing it, yet again, with a sword. She was thrown back as well, when the creature swung an arm? Tentacle? At her. Merlin tried to put himself between the creature and Gwen. He didn’t want to try to use magic in front of her, but he didn’t have another option. He could feel his ribs ache knowing he probably had one or two either broken or badly bruised. The creature suddenly screamed and fell with a sword sticking out of its back. Standing over it, was none other than King Arthur. Gwen jumped up and ran to him and threw her arms around his neck. Merlin collapsed back on to the floor. 

“Don’t worry about me,” he said, interrupting the two.

“Sorry Merlin.” Arthur said putting Gwen down and helping his friend up. When they got out of the ruins, Merlin was surprised to see a half dozen Knights and Aggravaine. They found the others and headed back to the village where Gaius had been left to treat the other men. When they got there, Merlin went in and got to work with his mentor. Or rather he tried to. Gaius made him sit down and pull his shirt off so he could wrap his ribs, and then wrapped his hand. There were a few other scrapes and cuts, but nothing severe. The Knights were brought in and laid down next to the villagers. Merlin had asked Gaius to treat them. He couldn’t bring himself to be near them just yet. Merlin was outside taking a break when Arthur came up to him. 

“So, care to tell me what happened?” He asked, sitting down next to him. 

“Not really.” Merlin said.

“Hm. Well too bad. As your King, I’m requiring you to tell me what happened after you left Camelot.”

Great. “When we made it here, I treated the men as best I could. There was something at work I didn’t understand, so I decided that night to send word to Gaius.”

“About that. Gaius showed me the note you sent.” Arthur said looking at him.

Merlin blushed. “Yes?”

“It appears you have a few more talents that I wasn’t aware of. So, just how many languages do you know?” 

“A fair few, I guess. Does it matter?” He asked looking down.

“Maybe. Maybe not. Runes were an interesting choice though. But, continue your tale.” Arthur prompted. 

“Ok. They weren’t getting any better so I did what I could and we made to come back to Camelot when we happened upon some bandits roughing up, what appeared to be, a girl. The Knights, of course, all jumped in to save to damsel in distress.” Merlin cleared his throat because he knew his bitterness was coming out. “The girl collapsed during the fight and when I tried to check her, she screamed. Like my touch caused her pain or something. Anyway, the Knights all seemed to…change. They wouldn’t listen to me or Gwen and said we were going to take Lamia home. She had them under some sort of enchantment. She was the cause of the illness for the villagers. We made it to those ruins and you managed to show up just in time. I’m not sure what would have happened if you hadn’t.” He finished. 

“I want to believe you, Merlin. But you left out a lot. What happened to the Knights? You said they changed, how?”

“I can’t tell you that. I can’t. If you want to know what happened either talk to them, or Gwen.” Merlin said, shaking his head trying to clear away the anger and disgust he had seen in their eyes when they looked at him. It wasn’t their fault, but, he couldn’t get the images out of his head. It hurt him more than they could hope to understand.

“Did something happen to you?” Arthur asked seriously.

“Just. Not right now, Arthur. Please.”

“Ok.” Arthur put his hand on Merlin’s shoulder and gave it a squeeze. “We’re going to head back in a few hours, so try to be ready.” He stood up then and walked off to find Gwen. He needed to get to the bottom of this. Merlin looked, crushed. He decided to corner Gaius before finding Gwen to see if everything was ready for them to go. “Gaius, how is everyone?” He asked while walking in the house. 

“Much better, Sire. It seems they’ve all made a full recovery. Though their memories from the last few days are lacking.”

“Interesting. So they don’t know what happened then? When they left here for Camelot?”

“No, Sire. Is that important?” Gaius asked.

“Maybe.” He said thoughtfully. “Gaius, did you treat Merlin for anything? I noticed his hand was wrapped.”

“Yes, Sire. He has a broken hand and a couple of bruised ribs. He should be fine.”

“Do you know how he broke his hand?”

“No, Sire. I do not. And he won’t talk about it. Has he said anything to you?”

“No. He told me to talk to Gwen or the Knights. But if they have no memory then I’ll have to ask Gwen. Hopefully she’s willing to fill in some blanks. If you’re sure everything is fine here, we plan to leave shortly to head back to Camelot.” When Arthur left he went to find Gwen. She was speaking with Mary. “Guinevere, I was wondering if we could talk for a moment.”

“Of course, Arthur.” She bid farewell to her friend and walked with Arthur. 

“Gwen, can you tell me what happened?” He asked her. When he looked at her, he caught a pained expression cross her face before she masked it. “Merlin won’t tell me. But I need to know.”

“Arthur. I will tell you. I promise. But, please, can we wait until we are back in Camelot?” She pleaded. 

Arthur nodded. “Very well. As soon as we get back I want the full story. Especially whatever happened that broke Merlin’s hand.” He said. Gwen winced at the mention of Merlin’s hand. She had known something happened, but he didn’t say anything or act hurt. But, he wouldn’t. That’s just how Merlin is. He was more concerned with the others than himself. Even though they had treated him like dirt.

The ride back to Camelot was quiet. Merlin wasn’t talking and was riding at the back with Gaius. He couldn’t look the others in the face. Lancelot stayed near him, but didn’t know what to say, as he also didn’t know what had happened. When the group finally made it back, Merlin and Gaius put their own horses away and Merlin tried everything to keep away from the Knights. When he ran inside, Gwaine had tried to follow, and Gwen stopped him. 

“He needs some time. I know you don’t remember what happened, but when you all were enchanted, you did and said many things. Just, leave him be for now.” She said.

“Would you fill us in, then? I can’t stand how quiet he’s being. And what happened to his hand?” Gwaine asked before she shushed him. 

“If you all want answers, I suggest we meet with Arthur in the audience chamber. I need you to understand something though. You all were under some sort of enchantment. The only ones not affected were me and Merlin. What happened was not your fault. If you had had your own free will, things would have gone very differently.” She said, trying to keep her tears from falling while pointing at each of the Knights standing there. She then turned to head to the audience chamber. She had requested Arthur to keep it amongst the group who had gone with Merlin. Percival, Gwaine, Leon, Elyan, Lancelot, Corbett, and Eoin. Gaius stayed too as he needed to hear why his boy was so upset and injured. Gwen began to recall the events that took place. When she got to the point where Leon had shoved Merlin down and that that was when he broke his hand, Leon looked like he was going to pass out. They were all upset, but maybe none so much as Arthur and Lancelot. They looked furious. Gwen kept reminding them that they were under an enchantment. But it didn’t make things any better. They looked at each other, not believing that they had hurt Merlin. Their little brother and they just threw him down. They wanted to make it right immediately. However, Arthur had other ideas. They were told to stay away from him for a few days. Under no circumstances were they to approach him. If they were caught trying, Arthur promised the stocks for a week. 

“Thank you for telling us what happened, Guinevere. It can’t have been easy.” Arthur said, hugging her and kissing her forehead. 

“It wasn’t as bad for me. No one looked at me like I was the enemy. But that Lamia, she had something against Merlin. It was something about him that caused her to affect everyone the way she did.” She answered and looked up at Arthur.

“You know what it is, don’t you?” She asked him quietly and then looked at the other Knights in the room. “You all know something about him. Something that could have been the reason she turned you all against him.” She paused. “You don’t have to tell me. I understand the necessity for secrets. But. If you do not make this right with him, you will lose him. So. After Arthur says you’re able to see him again, fix it. Make things right. Especially you.” She said, looking Gwaine in the eyes, and putting a finger in his chest. He nodded at her. They all left and went to their rooms to get some sleep for the night. They were all shocked at what they had done and said and didn’t speak. It was going to be a long few days. 


	15. Back to it then

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Trying to get past the events of the Lamia, Merlin relies on his closest friends, Gwen, Arthur, and Lancelot.

Lancelot came to get Merlin the next evening to pick up his sword training. He assured Merlin that it would just be him and Corbett. Merlin was stiff and during the training, but he knew he needed it. He followed Lancelot’s instructions and then was practicing against both him and Corbett. After an hour they were done for the night. Merlin went back to his room to wash up. Working his muscles had felt good. He wasn’t in a much better mood, by any means, but it had worked some stress out of his body that he had been holding on to. Merlin decided instead of going to sleep, though, he wanted to check out the library. When he got there he wasn’t surprised to find Geoffrey asleep on his desk. He just walked past him and went to a section that had various texts in different languages. What could it hurt? He grabbed a few and headed back to his room where he proceeded to lay down and read late into the night. 

“Merlin!” Gaius yelled. “Wake up, you’re going to be late.” When Gaius opened the door to wake Merlin up, he saw the boy was passed out on no less than three books. He shook his head walking over to him and put a hand on his shoulder. Merlin opened his eyes at this.

“Gaius?” He said sleepily.

“Merlin, you need to get going, or the King will come looking for you.” Merlin yawned and stood up to get on with his day. After he left, Gaius gathered the books Merlin had fallen asleep on. Three different languages. Nordic, French, and something he guessed as that might have been Greek. Merlin astounded Gaius. He absorbed knowledge like someone dying of thirst drinking water. He hoped to be able to tell Arthur about it at some point. 

Merlin ran to the kitchen grabbing a tray of food for the King and all but ran back to his chambers to wake him. He set the tray down on the table and opened the blinds. He then went to the wardrobe to grab out the training clothes that Arthur would need first thing that morning and set them on the screen. Merlin only then noticed that Arthur wasn’t in the room. He hadn’t been that late, had he? Hmm. He set about cleaning the room as best he could. Making the bed, putting dirty clothes in a basket, and then set about organizing the papers Arthur would need for his meetings for the day. 

“Merlin. Nice of you to show up today.” Arthur said waltzing into the room and going to sit down to eat. 

“Sorry, Sire. I overslept.” Merlin replied. Arthur looked at him questioningly. “After training, I was a little restless so I went and got a few books from the library.”

“What books did you get?” Arthur asked.

“Er, just some books of stories. Some Greek, and a few others. Hoping to get some inspiration for my own stories that don’t involve just our adventures together.” He said.

“Greek.” Arthur paused looking at Merlin. “Well were they stories written in Greek, or were they Greek stories?”

“Erm. Written in Greek. I suppose.” Merlin replied looking down. 

“Well, I won’t be needing you today. I have some things I need to discuss with Aggravaine and I don’t need you falling asleep in the middle of the council meetings.” Arthur said. “Make sure you sharpen my sword and polish my armor before returning to your...reading.” He said. “Oh, Merlin?”

“Yes?”

“Maybe later this week, or sometime soon, you can show me some of what you’re reading.” Arthur said genuinely curious to see how interested Merlin was in languages. 

“Sure. I can do that.” Merlin smiled at Arthur before turning to leave. He was lost in thought on his way to the armory to gather Arthur’s sword and armor and didn’t notice someone had fallen in step beside him. 

“Hey, Merlin.” Eoin said.

“Hey Eoin. How are you?” 

“I’m well. You?” 

Merlin shrugged. “Better. Arthur has asked me to show him some of the other languages I am learning.” He chuckled imagining Arthur trying to grasp some of them. “Should be fun.”

“Really? What are you going to show him?”

“I’m not sure. I have been looking into Greek lately, so maybe that? He already knows Latin and French. So it would be fun to do that or maybe some Gaelic? I dunno.” Merlin was still smiling.

“Well, don’t get too wrapped up you forget about our lessons tonight. Not that you need them. But I have something in mind I’d like to try with you.”

“I’ll be there. I have a few chores to take care of, but I should be done in plenty of time.”

“Alright, I’ll see you then!” Eoin said and headed off another corridor. 

As evening was falling, Merlin had finished cleaning and polishing Arthur’s armor and sharpened his sword. He changed into one of his training shirts, the black one, and headed out to the clearing. He knew the only ones who would be there were Corbett, Eoin, and Lancelot. He was starting to miss the others, but he still flinched a little when he saw them on the training field. He knew they were enchanted and it wasn’t their fault, but the looks in their eyes, their words, even some of their actions, still hurt. But, he missed them. He missed... _ him _ . Gwaine. Merlin shook his head. Now was definitely not the time for pining. When he got to the clearing, he noticed Eoin standing there looking at him expectantly. 

“Alright, Merlin, tonight I want to try something...different.”

“Ok.”

“Put this on.” Eoin said, handing him a blindfold.

“Erm. Ok…” As Merlin tied the band on his eyes, he listened for Eoin.

“Now, what you’re going to attempt is to hit a target using your other senses. I want you to listen to everything around you and feel everything. There aren’t many blade throwers who can manage this task, but I’m running out of things to challenge you with. So. Use your other senses.I’m going to be staying clear, so you won’t need to worry about injuring me.” When Eoin finished giving his instructions, Merlin listened to his boots crunch on the leaves as he retreated behind a tree. Merlin reached out with his senses. Feeling the air, and listening closely. There. he heard something fly through the air, he loosed a blade in the direction he felt the target was and heard it land. He waited. Reaching a hand out to feel the air better, he slowly turned listening. Another swish through the air, another blade thrown, another blade landed. He heard what sounded like two at once and quickly loosed two blades. Merlin had the other two blades in his hand already. After turning a few more times he heard the sound of more targets launched and sunk his last two blades. There was a clapping sound that was very loud to him after having been immersed in his senses. He covered his ears as quickly as he could until he was sure he could handle sound again. Merlin took his blindfold off to see why they were clapping. Eoin came forward holding the targets to show Merlin. Lancelot was the one who had been clapping, and Corbett was just standing behind him smiling. 

“Very good. You hit each target. I was hoping that maybe this exercise might challenge you more, but I don’t think there is anything left anyone can teach you about throwing blades. It might actually be time for you to teach others.” Eoin told him. 

“I think I’ll leave that to you all. Now if you want me to teach them basic first aid skills, that I can do.” Merlin said, smirking at the gathered Knights.

“Is there any other weapon you would like to have lessons on?” Lancelot asked.

“No. But. Do you think you could show me how to use a staff as well as a sword? Or maybe two swords? That could come in handy.” Merlin said thoughtfully.

“Do you want to have lessons on two different swords, or were you wanting to dual wield?” Corbett pitched in.

“Hmm. Well, dual wielding would be interesting, but I don’t think I’ve mastered enough basic swordsmanship to be able to do that. Do you?”

“Maybe. We could give it a shot and see how a few lessons go.” Corbett answers looking at Lancelot.

“I suppose. Are you adept enough at dual wielding? It’s a different type of sword, not the typical swords of a Knight.” Lancelot responded.

“True, but there are many types of swords in the armory. We can narrow down the best choices and find something that suits him. I have a set for dual wielding my father taught me with. Let’s give it a shot. Can’t hurt.”

“Alright.” Lancelot said, then turned to look at Merlin. “We’ll do a few lessons on dual wielding to get the basics and then see how you progress. If I don’t think it’s working, we’ll stop.”

“Fair enough.” Merlin told him. 

“Merlin, how would you feel about coming out for a drink tonight?” Lancelot asked him, putting an arm around his shoulders leading him back toward the castle. 

“I’m not really in the mood, Lance. Sorry. Maybe another time.” Merlin then walked off from his friends and headed back towards his room. But he wasn’t really in the mood to read or talk to Gaius. He found himself walking through town and in front of Gwen’s door. He knew she was probably asleep, but he wanted to talk to his friend, so he knocked. When Gwen opened the door, she was surprised to find Merlin, but led him inside. They sat down at the table and she had steaming tea in front of them in no time. Merlin didn’t say anything at first. Just sat enjoying her company. 

“Gwen, I don’t know what to do.” he said quietly. 

“About what, Merlin?” She asked.

“About what happened with the lamia. And everything they said. And did. The looks in their eyes. How are you able to do it? It’s been days now, but I still can’t bring myself to be in the same room, even.”

“You know that I told Arthur everything that happened, yes?” She prompted. Merlin could only nod. “He forbade them from trying to see you for a few days. Said he would throw them in the stocks if they disobeyed.”

“How did they react?” he asked looking down at his cup. 

“Oh, Merlin. Could you not guess? They were devastated.” Gwen looked as if she were about to cry. “Leon has been beside himself after finding out he’s the reason you have a broken hand. They are very anxious to begin trying to mend things with you. ALL of them.”

“Mmm. Have...have you talked to him? Gwaine?”

“Merlin.” She said and placed her hand on his arm, causing him to look up and meet her eyes. “He wants to see you. Badly. I was the one that stopped him running after you when we got back to the castle. I knew you needed time. They were enchanted. All of them. Not a single one of them would ever want to cause you harm. You are their little brother. They will cross the seas to see you happy again.”

“Thanks Gwen.” He said, sniffling a little. A few tears had made their way down his face. Gwen’s too. They both chuckled. “I might try to see him tomorrow or something. Thanks for, well, everything. You’re a good friend.” They sat for a while longer finishing their tea and talking. At some point, Merlin had closed his eyes and fallen asleep. Gwen just smiled at her friend. She grabbed a spare blanket and draped it over him, carefully laying him down on the bench he was on. She could tell how exhausted he must have been from the past few weeks and just smiled at his sleeping form. He trusted her enough that he could fall asleep with her. She went to bed, planning to wake him up in time to tend to Arthur. 

*******

“Merlin.” a hand was gently shaking him. That’s strange. Gaius was never gentle when he woke him up in the mornings. “Merlin, wake up.”

“Gwen?” Merlin asked, confused.

“Wake up, Merlin. You fell asleep here last night. But it’s time to go to the castle. I know you’ll be missed sooner rather than later.” She said sweetly. He smiled. 

“Sorry about that, Gwen. I guess I didn’t realize I was that tired. I hope I didn’t overstay my welcome.” He said standing up and stretching.

“Nonsense. The fact you were comfortable enough to fall asleep around me, it was wonderful. You are welcome to crash here any time. Though, if you make a habit of it, I’ll have to get you something to sleep on other than a bench.”

“Ok. Are you heading up too? I’ll walk with you.” 

“That would be lovely, Merlin.” She said and they headed out into the town and up to the castle. 

Merlin had forgotten he was wearing his training shirt, and hadn’t noticed that many were staring at the pair as they walked. They walked straight to the kitchen chatting the whole way, not noticing all the staring had continued. When Merlin got to Arthur’s chambers he opened the door and walked him. He set the tray down on the table and opened the curtains.

“Rise and shine!” Merlin yelled and laughed as Arthur groaned and covered his head with another pillow. “Oh, come on now, Sire, you have lots going on today.” Merlin said walking over and throwing the blankets back from the King. 

“Merlin!” Arthur shouted. Merlin then moved on and set out clothes and began cleaning. “Merlin.” Arthur said, a little confused. 

“Yes?”

“What is that you’re wearing? I didn’t think you owned anything that wasn’t red or blue.” He said honestly confused.

“What?” Merlin asked, and then looked down at himself. “Oh. Ah. I forgot I was still in my training shirt. Er well I fell asleep at a friends last night after training, and I guess I forgot. I’ll change before the meetings today.” He said blushing.

“I don’t know that that will be possible. We have a very busy day. I think you’ll be stuck in that all day. While I eat, tell me how training went last night anyway. Eoin told me he wanted to try something else with you last night.”

“I guess it went well.” Merlin said. When he saw Arthur’s face encouraging him to continue he scoffed a little. “Er, he had me put on a blindfold and then launched some targets through the air. We only did it once. I hit each target and then he said there was nothing more he could teach me.”

“Hmm. Are you going to pick a new weapon to learn? Lancelot approached me yesterday with the plan. So. What is your next choice?”

“Nothing new. Just working to improve what little sword skills I have. I may have mastered throwing knives, but I’m still not that great at the other weapons you wanted me to learn.”

“Alright. I want you to come to training this morning.” Arthur said getting up to change. 

“Don’t you think I should change? I mean, not everyone knows...about my scars.” He said quietly touching his neck where he knew the brand was visible. His heart felt like it was going to beat out of his chest. He felt anxious, felt panic start to rise. 

“Merlin. Calm down. Most of them know. You shouldn’t hide it. You survived. A mad man came after you, and you were the one left standing. Remember that.” Arthur said putting a hand on Merlin’s neck ensuring he had his full attention. A wind had begun to swirl through the room and he wasn’t ready for anyone to know about Merlin’s magic just yet. He was still working out some of the finer details with his council to make sure those with abilities weren’t being hunted down and killed, like his father had done. He had made progress with his council understanding he wanted the same punishments for crimes committed with magic to fit as if they were ordinary crimes. He’d been working on it in secret, not wanting to get Merlin’s hopes up in case his council had not agreed. He was close to getting it passed. But until it was, he didn’t want anyone to know about his friend. “Deep breath, Merlin. Deep breath.”

Merlin nodded and breathed out opening his eyes as he did. Arthur saw the shining gold in his eyes dissipate, and felt a wave of energy pass over him. 

“Sorry. You’re right. I’m just used to hiding my injuries from everyone. It’s strange having you know so much.” He chuckled at this. 

“Come on then,” Arthur said, “let’s get to training.” The pair walked out through the castle to the training grounds. Neither one noticed the many glances they were getting. Once at the training ground Arthur went to directing the Knights. Gwaine let out a low whistle as he caught sight of Merlin in his close fitting training clothes. He hadn’t seen Merlin in those clothes during the day. And he looked very good. He was already tall, with shaggy raven black hair, and more muscles than most people associated with the typically clumsy, easy-going servant. He looked almost regal standing with his back straight and shoulders back. Almost like he was a royal. Which, the Knights of the Round Table all knew he technically was. Without his neckerchief or long sleeved shirts, he had many scars visible that were normally hidden, including a brand on the side of his neck. Noticing that everyone was staring at Merlin, Arthur started yelling at everyone to pair up and get to work. Lancelot may have given Gwaine a shove to bring him back to the present. He cleared his throat and turned his back to Merlin and Arthur trying to get his focus back on training. Merlin kept back until Arthur wanted him to hold a shield up for practice. Apparently Arthur had some aggression to work out and for some reason hitting a sword at Merlin holding a shield always relieved some of his stress. 

Arthur had found himself in a tight spot the previous day. His Uncle was insistent that there must be a traitor in the council. After the incident with Caerleon, several had tried to retrieve the sword Arthur used during his fight. None could lift it. The only thing that could have caused it was magic. Arthur had confronted Merlin about it, quietly of course. All Merlin had told him was that, yes, magic had been placed on the sword. He wouldn’t give any more information. The only conclusion was that someone, someone Arthur trusted, was betraying him. But, who? He had thought briefly that it could have been his Uncle. But what reason would he have? After speaking with the man, Arthur had put him in charge of weeding out the one responsible. He only hoped the answer wouldn’t break his heart. He wanted to confide in his friend, his little brother, but there was so much that had happened to him recently he didn’t want to add any more trouble. After several minutes of wailing away on the shield, he noticed Merlin wasn’t having trouble taking the hits. He decided to even things up a bit. He grabbed a spare sword and tossed it to him. 

“I know you aren’t great yet, just try to keep up, yeah?” Arthur said. Merlin nodded and waited for the attack to commence. He blocked alternately with the shield and his sword. Arthur watched as Merlin didn’t stumble over his feet and had fallen into a rhythm with him. He could tell that Merlin wouldn’t be able to last much longer, but he was feeling better having been able to work out his aggression and stress. Merlin finally collapsed after a good half hour, breathing heavily. Arthur helped him up and patted his arm. “Good job, today. I wasn’t sure you’d be able to go more than ten minutes.”

“Thanks.” Merlin said, still trying to catch his breath. “I almost thought you were going to go easy on me.” He laughed a little. 

“Now why would I do that?” Arthur asked.

“Oh, no reason. But, uh, you seemed stressed. Anything I can help with?”

“Not this time, Merlin. I’d like to step your training up though. I’m going to instruct Corbett and Lancelot not to hold back. I want you to be training against them at their full capabilities. It’ll ease my mind in any future skirmishes.” Merlin rolled his eyes. The pair walked back to the castle to prepare for their afternoon meetings, oblivious to the silent training field. The Knights all were stunned. Nobody moved. 

“What just happened?” Percival asked.

“I have no idea.” Lancelot replied.

“Did you know he could fight like that?” Elyan asked.

“No. I mean, I knew he had potential, and he’s been getting better. But I had no idea he would be able to hold his own against the King.” Corbett said.

“Did you see how he moved?” Lancelot asked Corbett.

“I didn’t teach him that. I thought you did?” Corbett responded, stunned.

“Hmm.” was all Gwaine could manage.

“It’s alright to be stunned, Gwaine. He moved very gracefully. It was mesmerizing. Though we all were probably not paying attention to what you were.” Percival said with a smile. 

“It’s not that. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I did enjoy watching him, but, how many times do you think one person can surprise you? What’s next?” He said thoughtfully. 

“That’s a good question. Hey, do any of you know any Greek?” Eoin asked.

“Greek? Why?” Elyan asked, confused.

“Since we got back from the unfortunate lamia incident, he’s been learning Greek. I think maybe he throws himself into knowledge and books when something is bothering him. You think maybe he got some of those moves from reading?” Eoin told them.

“If anyone else has any more revelations about Merlin, for the moment, please keep them to yourself. My head might explode.” Leon said. They all agreed and continued on their training. 

Arthur actually felt much better after training. He was glad he made time for it today. Plus he was able to kind of use it for testing Merlin without making it feel like a test. He was coming along nicely. Arthur had a bath while Merlin went to fetch his lunch. When he was sitting at his desk wondering what was taking so long, he heard some voices from the hall, and heard Merlin laughing. He went to the door and heard Gwen laughing as well. What had those two found so amusing? Arthur opened the door and startled the pair. Arthur just raised an eyebrow at them. This caused more laughter.

“Sorry, Arthur.” Merlin said coming into the room and setting the tray down on the table. 

“Gwen, lovely to see you.” Arthur smiled at her, ignoring Merlin.

“Arthur. I hope we didn’t disturb you.”

“‘Course not. What were the pair of you laughing about anyway?”

“Oh, nothing really. I was just giving him a hard time about falling asleep at my place last night. He barely finished his tea and he was asleep. It was adorable, really.” She said, seeing Merlin blush just caused her to giggle at him. 

“What?!” Arthur nearly yelled. “That’s the friend's house you fell asleep at? Gwen?”

“Erm, yeah. I just wanted to talk with a friend. Gwen’s been my friend longer than you have, you know?” 

“Still, it isn’t appropriate for you to sleep in a house with a woman you aren’t betrothed or related to.” Arthur was annoyed. He sat down to eat while Merlin just rolled his eyes. 

“Yes, Arthur, because clearly I’m trying to steal Gwen’s heart.” he said and laughed. Gwen laughed too. Arthur was still annoyed, but tried to let it go. 

“Merlin, get my papers ready for the meetings this afternoon.” Arthur told him. 

“Yes, Sire.” Merlin said, shaking his head.

“Arthur,” Gwen said, putting a hand on Arthur’s cheek, “Merlin is like your little brother, yes? Then does that not also make him mine as well? I love you Arthur.” She leaned down and kissed his cheek and then left. Arthur was watching after her, already missing her company. 

“So, do you know how much longer you are going to wait to marry her?” Merlin asked from across the room.

“Shut up, Merlin.” Arthur said. Merlin laughed at this but continued to work through the papers Arthur would need. 

Once they were ready, they headed to the council meeting. Merlin stood to the back by Arthur as he always does. Many of the council members were staring at the servant. Including Aggravaine. Merlin had his hands clasped behind his back, doing what he could to hide his scarred arms. Nothing he could do about the remaining marks. Arthur went about business as usual, often having to repeat himself as his advisors were not paying attention to him entirely. They kept staring back at Merlin. After enough times of trying to push forward with the meeting he called for a break. 

“Merlin, could you attend to your other tasks? It seems I’m getting nowhere. You are too fascinating for this lot. Not to me, obviously. I still think you’re an idiot.” He said grinning at his friend. 

“It’s fine, Arthur. I know it’s a lot to take in. I’ve got to head down to the lower town anyway and check on some patients for Gaius. There is every chance that when I go, that I’ll be stuck until I tell a story tonight. If you want to come, you should bring Gwen. Maybe...maybe you could bring the Knights? I think it’s time to be around them again. I miss them. I know they were enchanted, but I’d like to try to move forward.” Merlin finished.

“Sounds great. What story are you going to tell tonight?” 

“I’m not sure. Do you have something you’d like to hear?”

“Hmm. Tell one about you.”

“Erm, ok. Well I have a couple in mind. Should I include romance or meeting a new friend?”

“Do the new friend for tonight. Do I know which friend it will be about?” 

“You will. Let’s just say he’s one of your most trusted Knights now.” Merlin chuckled already thinking how to best tell the story of how they met and befriended Gwaine. He smiled. “Good luck with the rest of the afternoon. I hope to see you tonight.” Merlin walked off. 

Arthur watched him leave. Once he was gone he turned to his council. He knew he looked angry. Because he was. 

“Let me make this clear. If you ever show such blatant disrespect again, I will dismiss this council. Is that understood?” He looked each advisor in the eye to ensure the message sunk in. There were many yes, Sire’s, and apologies.

“If you’ll forgive my asking, Sire, how is it your servant has a brand?” Aggravaine asked.

“When we were captured by slavers after the coronation celebrations, apparently the men were more interested in him, than the rest of us. One of them branded him when they were torturing him. They had decided going after him would get them better results than me or the Knights.” Arthur paused letting that sink in. “Now. There is business we need to attend to.” As he sat down the council returned to the matter at hand. With Merlin absent now, Arthur felt comfortable talking about his plans and laws regarding magic. Another week and he was certain that the new laws would be ready to be distributed. 

Arthur walked the corridors to the Knights hall to invite them down to hear the story for the night. When he walked in they were sitting around, not really seeming to have a purpose. 

“Alright you lot, stop moping around.” Arthur said as he came in. “Come on. It’s story time tonight, and you were invited.”

“Really? Are you sure?” Percival asked hopefully. 

“I’m sure. He told me himself. He wants to forgive you. But. You cannot rush this. If I see he is in distress, I will send you off.” 

“Of course.” Leon said. They all nearly rushed the door to get ready and head to the town. Arthur rolled his eyes and headed to pick up Gwen. When he knocked on her door, she was surprised to see him. He smiled. He couldn’t get over how beautiful she was. How her hair curled gently down over her shoulders, how her eyes lit up when she smiled at him. 

“Arthur! What brings you down here?”

“Gwen. I was hoping you’d accompany me to the lower town tonight. There’s going to be a story and I wanted to go with you. Would that be alright?”

“Of course! Let’s go.” She said grabbing a shawl. As they walked, he held his arm out for her, which she accepted and held on to his arm gingerly. When they arrived, the townspeople were a little shocked and didn’t know what to do. He simply went over to a bench and sat down with Gwen. Shortly after the Knights showed up as well taking up a few benches. When Merlin came out of a house dragged by his friends, Diana and Ada, everyone cheered. When he got up on the small stage he managed a small bow and waved at everyone. They started to quiet down.

“Ok, ok, I know it’s been too long, and I am sorry about that. But I’m here now, so! I was requested to tell a story about myself tonight, but you know me, that’s not really something I like to do. I will tell you my version of it so in a way it’s about me. This story takes place some, two years ago, when the King and I were on a hunt. He was still just a Prince back then though.”

Merlin walked across the stage as he talked of how the Prince had had a successful hunt and decided to stop in at a tavern they had come across. Now the Prince didn’t know it at the time, but Merlin hadn’t even turned 18, at least not for a few more days, so technically the servant shouldn’t have been in there. This caused the crowd to laugh and Arthur just stared at him and put his hand on his face and groaned. This caused more laughter. Merlin continued on with an unsavory fellow coming in and demanding money from the owner, Mary. As soon as he said this, he heard a shout from the back. He knew Gwaine was listening and that this would be the story of how they met. Merlin described how he may have antagonised the man, unintentionally of course, and then the man had whistled and many more came in. A man with long brown hair had come to stand beside Merlin and the Prince and proceeded to drain his drink and knock out the first man standing next to him. The brawl began and Merlin had ducked under the bar and started breaking plates and jugs over anyone’s head that came near him. Mary did the same, as she was behind the bar too. The man who threw the first punch came up to Merlin and asked for a jug, which he handed over. He asked, what do they call you then? Merlin told him his name and the man introduced himself as Gwaine shaking his hand. A man tried coming up behind him and Gwaine smashed the jug on his head knocking him out. Another man then ran at the Prince with a knife, and Gwaine stopped him, but got stabbed in return. The pair put the man responsible in the stocks before taking the wounded hero and heading back to Camelot. Merlin helped his guardian and mentor care for the man. When he woke, he was not happy that a King wanted to thank him for saving the Prince. Gwaine did not like nobility and wanted nothing to do with them. Merlin watched as the young man wandered the town and ran into none other than Guinevere. This caused some chuckles as many who had encountered him knew the man to be a flirt. He flirted with Gwen calling her a princess before heading to the tavern. Merlin had been minding his own business tending to his chores in preparation for the upcoming melee, when Gwen came and told him he needed to get to the tavern. When he got there he found a very drunk Gwaine and an angry tavern owner. This caused even more laughter. Merlin had promised payment and had the Prince pay for it. He half-carried a barely standing Gwaine back to his room so he could sleep off the alcohol. But instead of just leaving him, he talked. He discovered the man’s father had been a Knight. He could have been living like a nobleman, even be a Knight already himself, but that’s not what he wanted. The following day had Merlin and a hungover Gwaine polishing boots for the entire Army to pay for the debt at the tavern. This caused even more laughter. Merlin then told of how many Knights from all over had come for the melee and how the Prince had offered up his servant to whoever needed him. This caused many boos. Merlin calmed them down. He talked of how a few of the Knights who decided to use him, were all for having someone at their beck and call. When Merlin had been cleaning one of the rooms, he came across some unique blades. Blunt in appearance but extremely sharp and dangerous. Forged with magic. He knew they would be attempting to kill the Prince in the upcoming melee, but being a servant, his word would count for nothing to the King. He told his mentor and his new friend that he planned to sneak in the room and get the blades as proof. But when he got there, he noticed the men had strange crystals around their necks. They looked like Knights the Prince had known, but the crystals showed different faces. The faces of two men from the tavern brawl that Gwaine had saved them from. Of course as soon as Merlin saw who they were the men woke up and decided to use Merlin for target practice throwing daggers at him as he stood by the wall. This earned more angry shouts. He ran from the spot where a dagger would have hit him in the face to be met with the men holding the enchanted blades keeping him from leaving the room. Gwaine rushed into the room and asked Merlin if he was ok. Merlin shook his head as he was definitely not ok. He was scared of what would happen to him if he was left alone with the imposters another minute longer. Gwaine was brilliant and disarmed the imposter Knights. However, the Knights of Camelot had shown up and Gwaine was arrested and taken to the King. When asked why he attacked the noblemen, he said he was protecting Merlin. That these men were not nobles. That nobility was defined by what you do, not who you are. The crowd cheered to this. Unfortunately since Merlin was the only one who knew that Gwaine was a noble, and he refused to say anything, the King banished him from Camelot. This earned more boos. The melee was starting and Merlin had no idea how to protect the Prince! The fighting wore on and it was down to the Prince and the two imposter knights. Another man came out and disarmed the first man stealing his blade and killing him with it. He then did the same to the remaining man. This left him and the Prince. When Gwaine revealed himself, the King was furious that a supposed commoner would interfere. When the men were brought to a medical tent to be examined, the King came in and was demanding the execution of Gwaine. More boos. Gaius stopped the angry King showing him the enchanted crystals and how the man he wanted executed saved the Princes’ life. Again. The King, still furious, refused to lift the banishment. Gwaine was ok with it for now. Merlin hated to see the new friend he had made, leave. But as everyone knew, it wasn’t the end. Gwaine indeed returned and is now one of the King’s most trusted Knights. The crowd erupted in cheers and clapping. The children stormed the stage and Merlin was lost under a pile, causing more laughing and cheering. The tavern owner came over and pulled Merlin up and gave him a big hug in front of everyone. Drinks were brought out and passed around. 

“I don’t think I even have the words to express just how much we all missed this, missed you. Having you here again, Merlin. It’s truly wonderful seeing you smile and enjoying yourself. To Merlin!” He shouted and raised his glass. Everyone followed suit. Merlin just smiled. He was trapped on the stage for at least an hour as the people filed through to give him hugs and thank him for coming by. Merlin had noticed the King and Gwen left earlier, though some of the Knights were hanging back. He made his way over to them. 

“I’m sorry I haven’t been to see you all lately. I was trying to process, I guess. I know nothing you did or said was your fault. But it’s hard to forget it. If you can be patient with me, I’d like to try being friends again.” 

“Merlin. You have nothing to apologize for. We do. We are truly sorry for everything that happened. We will do whatever we can to earn your trust again.” Leon said. Merlin reached his hand out to him and they shook. Smiling, Leon turned and headed back to the castle. 

“Can we talk?” Merlin asked, grabbing Gwaine’s arm before he could follow the others. 

“Of course. Anything for you.” They walked away from the remaining crowd a little ways to a small alley. Merlin whispered something in his hand, eyes glowing. He opened his hand and handed a rose to Gwaine.

“I want to stay close to you, Gwaine. I like what we had...have. I’m not ready to lose that. If you can give me some time, I’d like for us to keep being us.” Merlin said looking at him hopefully. Gwaine felt his chest warm and reached up to touch Merlin's cheek. 

“I had no idea you were such a romantic.” Gwaine said, making Merlin look at him. He kissed him then. Not caring that people could see, not caring that the Knights weren’t far away and were snickering at them. Merlin leaned in to the kiss and Gwaine was back against a wall. It seemed they both had missed this. They stopped long enough to catch their breath and just leaned against each other. “We should probably head back.”

“Probably. But, I do still owe you a drink. Care to make that tonight? Every time we try to plan it, something comes up.” Merlin said not wanting to move away.

“A drink sounds great. Let’s go see how many free ones we can get, eh?” Gwaine winked at Merlin who rolled his eyes. He handed Gwaine the flower, who promptly put it behind his ear causing Merlin to laugh. The pair walked over to the tavern and earned some cheers as the crowd saw who arrived. 


	16. Who is Emrys?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Based around the episode, "The Secret Sharer".

When Merlin woke up the next morning, his head was pounding. He should not have drank so much. He knew he would regret it, but it was helping to keep him somewhat calm while spending time with Gwaine. He kept half expecting to see anger and resentment in the other man’s eyes when he looked at them. Instead all he saw was adoration and happiness. Maybe that’s what caused him to get carried away. He reached a hand up to his head and realized a few things at once. The first, was obviously the headache. The second, he was not in his bed, because his bed was not this soft. The third, there was someone half on top of him. What happened?! He tried opening his eyes to see what was going on. It took longer than he expected, but when he did, he blushed bright red. He still had his pants on, so that was good, but his shirt was missing and so was the other person’s. The mop of soft brown hair covered his face, but he knew who it was. What had made him turn red, was that standing in the room at the end of the bed, were no less than four Knights, who were all smiling at him. He covered his face with his free hand. 

“What happened?” He asked them. This led to some snickering.

“What do you mean?” Elyan asked, innocently.

“Haha, very funny. You know what I mean. What happened? Because I do not remember getting back to the castle last night.” He said trying to extricate himself from under the other man. He didn’t want to disturb him, he looked peaceful. 

“Oh, come on, now Merlin. You two were stumbling through the streets and made it here. Though we aren’t sure how. There was a lot of laughing and shushing each other. We were hoping you could tell us.” Corbett said, grinning. Merlin grabbed a shirt, not sure whose it was, his trousers, and shoved his boots on, determined to leave and get on with his day after getting a hangover cure from Gaius. 

“So what exactly are you lot doing in here then? Hmm? Spying?” He said, blushing even more.

“No, not at all. The King was just yelling for you. Said you weren’t in your room and was worried where you’d ended up.” Eoin added. 

“That’s just fantastic. And I suppose you, out of the goodness of your hearts, didn’t tell him?” Merlin said sarcastically, but holding his head as it still felt like it was splitting in two.

“Of course we didn’t! What kind of friends would that make us?” Percival responded. 

“I suppose if he’s looking for me, that I’ve missed getting his breakfast?” 

“Merlin, it’s almost midday. You better get him an amazing lunch and hope he doesn’t ask too many questions. We’ll cover for you if we can, but you should hurry.” Elyan added. Merlin groaned.

“I’m going to get a hangover cure from Gaius, and then I’ll do it. I can’t face him if my head feels like it’s splitting.” He said, rubbing his temples and making to leave, stumbling.

“Here. We knew you’d need it.” Corbett says handing over a vial that looked exactly like the remedy he needed. 

“What is it you all want?” Merlin asked, suspicious of their motives, yet accepting the vial and drinking it, feeling it’s effects instantly. 

“Nothing much. Well. Two things actually. One, you help us to better our knife throwing. Two, you tell us what you know about how magic works. We don’t want to use it, we just want to know more about it.” Corbett answered him. 

“Er. Alright. I can probably do that. The knife throwing, I’ll try my best. The magic bit, it’ll be confusing but I’ll try to keep it simple. When are you wanting to hold me to these requests?”

“Not right now, obviously. The King needs you, but how about the evening after you do your weekly testing? Arthur won’t be testing you for at least another week because he considers practice the other day to count as your test for the week. So that gives you another four days before we’ll call in the favors.” Eoin says.

“Hmm. You know, blackmailing me, is a pretty high risk move. I’m impressed. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to be on my way.” Merlin said and they heard him take off running when he got a few steps down the hall. 

“Were any of you going to tell him that he put my shirt on?” Gwaine said sitting up and looking at his friends. Their smiles reached ear to ear.

“Absolutely not!” Elyan said.

“We wanted to see what the King said when he figured it out. Which we probably better be on our way to witness.” Percival said and was gone along with Elyan, Corbett and Eoin. Gwaine lay back down and stared at the ceiling. He hoped waking up next to him hadn’t scared Merlin. It hadn’t been intended, but it had been a really fun night. There was a lot of drinking, a lot of talking, a lot of laughing and smiling, and plenty of kissing after leaving the tavern. He hadn’t been as drunk as Merlin, but he had still been drunk. He practically carried Merlin back to the castle, which was an interesting change. Gwaine was smiling as he got up and dressed and headed out to get on with his day. 

Merlin had made it to Arthur’s chambers and opened the door coming in with the best lunch he could muster. Plenty of meat, cheese, and fruit. He set the tray down feeling Arthur watch him from his desk. He couldn’t read the expression on his face and did his best to keep his head down and go about his chores. Merlin quickly started making the bed, to keep his hands busy and avoid talking to the King as long as possible. Once the bed was made, he moved to grab the discarded armor throughout the room. Once he had it all together, he started putting the clothing in a basket to head down to wash. When Merlin stood up with the basket in his arms, armor on top, he turned to leave, finding his path blocked. 

“Merlin. Care to tell me where it is you’ve been this morning?” Arthur asked, betraying nothing in his face. 

“Oh, er, overslept. Had a little too much to drink last night as everyone was very excited to see me again. Got a little carried away. It won’t happen again.” Merlin said hoping that covered everything, but Arthur just pursed his lips. This can’t be good.

“Hmm. So you’re telling me, your King, that you simply overslept. Correct?”

“Yes.” Merlin said, hoping for chastised or sheepish.

“Funny. I went to your room and you weren’t there. Gaius said he hadn’t seen you come home last night. So. Where is it you slept?” Arthur asked, eyeing him suspiciously. “And, while you’re at it, you can tell me who’s shirt it is you’re wearing?” Merlin’ face dropped and he looked down. Oh, no. He’d grabbed Gwaine’s shirt.

“Uh, it’s not important.” He said, trying to move around Arthur, who simply stepped into his path again.

“Merlin. If you want to leave this room, you will answer my questions.”

Damn. “Fine. Er, I slept in the Knights quarters, as they spotted me stumbling back. The shirt is one of theirs, I suppose.” Merlin said, though his face was burning. He could still smell Gwaine on the shirt. Which didn’t help the blushing. Arthur knocked the pile out of Merlin’s arms and grabbed his head under his arm. The two wrestled for a bit as Merlin had had some lessons and was kind of prepared. It of course still ended with Arthur holding Merlin in a headlock rubbing his hair until he started talking.

“Ow! Ow! Ow! Ok! Stop, I’ll talk! I fell asleep in Gwaine’s room and just grabbed the first shirt on the floor before being blackmailed by some of the others and running to grab your lunch. Now please get off of me!” Merlin said. Arthur was grinning crookedly. 

“Now, was that so hard?” He laughed helping Merlin up. 

“You just couldn’t let it be could you?” Merlin asked, rubbing his head.

“Nope. We agreed, no more secrets, remember?” Arthur said sitting down at the table to eat. Once Merlin had the pile in his hands again, he opened the door spilling in the blackmailers. Rolling his eyes, he stepped over them and then headed down the corridor. 

“What is it you all are blackmailing him for, anyway?” Arthur asked the fallen Knights.

“Oh, uh, just some lessons on knife throwing and magic.” Corbett answered.

“Hmm. I’m not interested in knife throwing, but do you think he’d be willing to do basic magic lessons for more people? I’m going to need to know more if the law changes are going to be pushed through in the next week.” Arthur said thoughtfully. And, as an afterthought, “have Gwaine see me on the training field in an hour. I need to have a word. Actually, no, not the training field. Have him meet me where you usually train Merlin. One hour. I don’t care if you all are there or not. If you do plan to be there, gather the rest of the Round Table.” The men in the pile got up and headed off to gather the others including Gwaine. This should be interesting. 

Arthur paced his room for a little while after eating, trying to think what best to say to his Knights. He didn’t care what relationships they were in, as long as they didn’t let them get distracted. But this. This was going to be a major distraction for the unlikely pair. He thought back on how long he had known Gwaine and each encounter they had. Every time they met, he almost always went straight to Merlin first. Barely glancing at Arthur. Hmm. He seemed to have the need to be near him or touching him almost constantly. Whether it was a hug or sitting close to each other by the fire, or standing close enough their shoulders touched. He figured it was a comfort thing. As long as it didn’t interfere with either of their duties, then he was happy for them. But today, it had interfered. Merlin had missed an entire morning. While Arthur was glad to see Merlin happy again, he also wanted, no, needed to ensure that he was treated with respect. So. He decided it was time to haze, so to speak, the man vying for his little brother’s affections. Smiling to himself he strapped his sword on his waist and headed to the clearing. One fight, and then he would drop it. 

“Gwaine. Nice of you to join us.” Arthur said, smirking at the other man as he came in to the clearing. 

“Of course, princess. I was led to believe I didn’t have an option.” 

“You didn’t.” Arthur agreed. 

“So, then. What’s this about?” Gwaine asked cautiously. 

“Merlin. What else?” He said, as if it should have been obvious.

“Merlin? What about him?”

“Merlin, as you are aware, is what I consider my little brother. So I decided to make my threat as clear as possible. You hurt him, in any way, you will be dealing with me. You distract him from his training or daily tasks, you will be dealing with me. You wish to continue your relationship, you will respect certain things. Certain...boundaries, if you will.”

“Boundaries. Shouldn’t he be the one telling me what boundaries he has?” Gwaine asked smiling at the ordeal he found himself in. 

“The problem is, Gwaine. That you don’t have just me to deal with if anything happens to him. You would have all of us. So. If you think this is something you want to pursue. You will prove it to each of us.” As he finished his statement, he swung his sword at Gwaine who barely blocked it in time. Arthur was determined to make sure his words were absorbed and that his Knight understood the severity of any wrong-doings involving Merlin. Once he had fought for a few minutes, he stepped away. And one by one, the other Knights also fought Gwaine. By the end of it, Gwaine had managed to hold onto his sword and not collapse. Sweat was rolling off of him in sheets and he was panting heavily. “Now I believe you fully understand what awaits you, should anything unpleasant occur. You will maintain your duties as a Knight, which means if we are on patrol or in a battle your duty is to your King first. We have all done much to ensure he can protect himself. And I believe that anyone, Morgana included, would have much to fear from Camelot and it’s citizens should he be threatened or put in danger. I will not interfere with your relationship as long as you are able to follow these instructions.” Arthur said reaching out a hand to the other man. Gwaine shook it and grinned at his King and the other Knights.

“I suppose I’m not allowed to tell him about this little session then, yeah?”

“Not unless you want to be in the stocks for a month.” Arthur said before turning to walk back to the castle. He had a meeting with Aggravaine that he wanted to get over with. His Uncle seemed to think he knew who was betraying them, and he was anxious to find out. The rest of the Knights followed behind Arthur, and behind them, Gwaine.

*******

Arthur was pacing at the back of his small audience chamber while his Uncle called members of the council through to question them. After a few questions, Arthur would always come to stand by his chair. He couldn’t sit still. Not knowing that one of the men coming through today would inevitably be the traitor he was looking for. 

“Sire. I believe I know who has betrayed us. But I don’t believe you will like the answer.” Aggraviane announced. 

“Get on with it, then. Who?” Arthur asked, obviously agitated.

“I believe it was the court physician. Gaius. He’s hiding things, you could tell by his body language when I was asking him questions. Questions that should have had simple answers. I believe some of what he is hiding could be detrimental to your reign.” He concluded.

“Hm.” Arthur didn’t want to believe it, his Uncle had been correct about that. Gaius had been around since even before he was born. He would not think ill of the man. Not until they had some sort of proof. “There is no proof that Gaius would do anything to cause me or the kingdom any harm. Until such a time, he will be treated with the respect he has earned. If you can bring me proof of treachery, then, I will be ready to believe. But not until then. You are dismissed.” Aggravaine bowed and left the room. Arthur stayed in the room for a little while longer, thinking. 

When Aggravaine had gotten to his chambers, he decided to put his plan into action. He dropped off his papers and grabbed a decorative box with a dagger inside and left in search of a particular servant. When he spotted the boy he pulled him aside in an alcove. He had startled the boy, which he found funny. 

“Merlin, glad I could find you. I know it is getting late, but I wanted to ask a favor, if you will. You see, I recently got this fine dagger for the King as a present. But the blade has dulled. Would you ensure it gets sharpened?”

“Of course. I’ll get it done in the morning.” Merlin said and took the box.

“Actually, I was hoping you could do it tonight? And then leave it for the King to find in the morning. I think it would be a nice surprise. Don’t you?”

“Yeah. Ok. I’ll do it after my evening chores. I’m sure he’ll love it.” Merlin smiled and walked off to tend to the King. Aggravaine heads off out of the castle. He needs to be ready to fulfill his part in Lady Morgana’s latest plot. Once darkness had fallen, Aggravaine met a man by the stables. They proceeded to enter the castle and head to the physician’s chambers. Once there, the bald man covered in strange markings, touches Gaius’ face and says something causing the older man to pass out. The other, taller man then picks Gaius up and they depart the citadel at a high rate of speed. Aggravaine set one of the King’s horses loose to make it look as though the man were fleeing. He then returned to his room, carefully, having spotted Merlin walking through the halls to deliver the dagger to the King. Shortly after returning, he had already changed to his night clothes so as not to draw attention to himself. He hadn't been waiting long when a knock came to his door. It was Sir Leon coming to tell him of a missing horse. Aggravaine hurried to dress and went straight to the physicians chambers with a few other guards. He was a very good actor when he needed to be. Seeing the room sufficiently empty, he sent a guard to ring the warning bell, then had the others started tearing apart the room looking for evidence.

When Arthur arrived, he was in shock. He couldn’t believe that Gaius would do this. His Uncle confirmed that a horse was missing as were some of Gaius’ belongings. It seemed he had fled in the night.

“I shall organize a search party immediately, Sire.” Aggravaine said.

“No.”

“My lord?”

“No. If he’s gone, then let him leave.”

“Of course, Sire.” Aggravaine bowed and ordered the guards out of the now destroyed physician’s chamber. Merlin was standing behind the King attempting to mask his face, but Aggravaine saw the hurt there plainly. The boy then glared at Aggravaine. Hmm. That might be a problem for him if the boy caught on to his plans. He’d have to ensure that didn’t happen. Morgana needed time alone with Gaius to extract the information she was seeking. He decided he would ride out to check on her progress as soon as he was able to leave. It was a few hours, but he was finally able to get away. When he arrived, Gaius was laying on a stone tablet surrounded by fire. The man, the Catha, was continuously asking the same questions and repeating the same phrases to get Gaius to open up. The old man was stubborn. 

“Arthur has decided to abandon our dear old Gaius, as a traitor who fled in the night.” Aggravaine told Morgana.

“How wonderful. That means we are sure not to be interrupted.” Morgana purred. “Now, run along back to my dear brother before he grows suspicious.” Aggravaine nodded to her and left. When he returned to his room, he changed and went straight to his duties with the council and advising Arthur. 

Merlin couldn’t think straight. Arthur was so quick to dismiss Gaius as a traitor. He had tried convincing him that Gaius would never leave in the night, that Aggravaine was lying and he had been shut down. Arthur refused to listen to him. Sitting on the floor surrounded by papers and broken containers, Merlin felt lost. He looked through some of the papers, just looking at Gaius’ handwriting. The door opened, and he half hoped it was Gaius. But when he turned around, it was only Gwen. Though he wasn’t sad to see his friend, he wanted Gaius back. He turned back to the mess so she wouldn’t see the tears threatening to fall down his face. She sat down beside him on the floor and put a hand on his back trying to comfort him. 

“Gaius would never do the things he’s been accused of. He’s dedicated his life to this kingdom, to its people.” He said.

“I know. I don’t know why Arthur would think such things.” She answered.

“It’s Aggravaine. He’s poisoning Arthur’s mind against his friends. I just don’t understand why he can’t see that.” Merlin wiped his face as the tears escaped.

“Do you have any proof? Aggravaine is his Uncle. The only family he has left.” She said. When Merlin looked at her wanting to argue, she continued, “Or rather the only family he thinks he has. He knows someone is betraying him, but he doesn’t know who. And there is no proof that it’s his Uncle.” 

“Then I shall get some proof. Gaius would not abandon Camelot.” Merlin said. “He would not abandon me.” he finished with a whisper. 

Merlin,taking matters into his own hands, snuck into Aggravaine’s room to see what evidence he could find. Under the bed he pulled out a strange locked chest. Using a quick spell to unlock the lid, he opened it to find books on sorcery. Merlin shook his head and locked the chest. Aggravaine’s boots caught his attention. There was an odd looking dirt on them. Red-ish in color, and almost like clay. He rubbed some on his thumb, but just then, the door opened and Aggravaine walked in. Merlin quickly hid behind the changing screen. He listened to the other man move through the room, much like he did when he was listening for targets when he was throwing his blades. He moved from behind the screen to the door, just as Aggravaine was coming around the screen. He hoped that he had been successful in sneaking out, but Aggravaine had caught sight of him in his mirror. 

Walking back to the physician’s chambers, he kept his eyes on the substance he got off Aggravaine’s boot. When he opened the door, he found Gwaine sitting on a bench. Merlin left the door open, hoping that Gwaine would leave. He didn’t want to involve anyone in this. 

“I’m busy.” He said curtly.

“I just wanted to stop by and see how you were. See if you needed any help.” Gwaine said.

“I’m fine.” Merlin snapped. Gwaine winced at the response. Merlin sighed, he didn’t want to push him away. He was just frustrated. “Do you know what this is?” He asked.

“I might do.” Gwaine stood up and came over and sat down right next to Merlin, their knees touching. He touched the substance, sniffed it, then tasted it. “It’s iron ore. Only one place it’s found inside Camelot’s borders. Passed by there on a patrol not long ago.” 

“I know no one believes Gaius is innocent, but I swear to you it’s true. He wouldn’t leave me. He was taken. And I think he was taken to the place where this is. Can you show me?” Merlin looked up at the other man.

“How about I take you there. If Gaius is really there, and is in trouble, you’re going to need help getting him back. When do we leave?” He looked expectantly at Merlin who grinned at him mischievously. 

“Right now. Arthur won’t listen to me. I won’t wait for Gaius to be killed for him to see reason.” Merlin said and stood up, Gwaine standing too. Merlin grabbed the other’s hand, “Thank you. For not doubting me.” Gwaine squeezed his hand.

“Of course. Anything for you.” He said and they ran out of the room and to the stables. The pair raced out of the citadel. The sun was going down and they were spotted by Aggravaine and a worried Lancelot. Aggravaine raced to get to Morgana’s hidden hovel, while Lancelot went to the King. He knocked on the door to Arthur’s chambers and waited. 

“Enter.” Lancelot opened the door upon hearing Arthur’s voice. The King was at his desk reviewing some documents. “Lancelot. What brings you by?”

“Sire. I wanted to see if you knew how Merlin was doing?”

Arthur sighed. “He is not happy. He does not believe that Gaius would ever betray the kingdom. Instead he accused Aggravaine of manipulating Gaius’ absence. I can’t understand why he would do that.” Arthur paused. “How does he seem to you?”

“I’m not sure. I haven’t seen him all day. However, I did just see him and Gwaine riding out of the citadel in a hurry to get somewhere.”

“What?” Arthur exclaimed, standing up.

“Just passing it along, Sire. I believe that Merlin may be going to track his guardian. Gaius is like a father to him. He would never abandon him. I don’t think there’s anything we can do now but wait, though. As I don’t know where they would be headed.”

“I want you and Percival to man the front gates tonight. If they come back, if something has happened, I want you to bring news straight back to me.”

“Yes, Sire.” Lancelot bowed and left to find Percival. He only hoped that Merlin and Gwaine weren’t getting in over their heads. 

*******

The man, Alator was his name, the Catha Priest, was trained in torture. He was skilled at using magic to burn through a man’s mind to reveal their secrets. He had been asking Gaius for hours who Emrys was and where he was. He created a physical circle of fire around the older man, that resembled the fire in his mind. The man finally broke sometime after midnight. 

“Who is Emrys?”

“Emrys, is the name given to him by the Druids. But I know him by another name.”

“Who is he?”

“Merlin!” Gaius shouted.

“Where is he?” 

“In Camelot” Alator was quiet. He listened as Gaius told him of the prophecy of Emrys guiding the Once and Future King to a time of peace and prosperity for all. Where magical people would be free and unafraid of persecution. The time of Albion. After the older man passed out, exhausted from his ordeal, the Catha left him and walked through the caves to his guard. They had heard someone coming in and knew it wasn’t Morgana. The two separated to search out who had found them. 

Gwaine and Merlin crept through the caves after tying up their horses. When they were a couple dozen paces inside, the tunnels split. Before they could choose a path, a very tall, muscular man appeared and began trading blows with Gwaine. When the man had knocked Gwaine to the ground, Merlin used his magic to trip the man, who then landed on Gwaine’s sword. Merlin helped Gwaine up.

“Thanks for that.” Gwaine said.

“No problem. We need to split up. If you find Gaius, do not wait for me. Promise me.” Merlin told him.

“I don’t like it. But, I promise if I find him I will get him back to Camelot. If you are not behind us, then I will not hesitate to come back out after you.” Gwaine said. Then, before Merlin could react, he pulled him in for a quick kiss. The two smiled at each other and then headed down separate tunnels. Gwaine walked into an open chamber and found none other than Aggravaine standing over Gaius’ still form with a large knife held up to him.

“Aggravaine?! What have you done?” He asked.

“I haven’t done anything. I saw you and Merlin race out of the citadel and thought you must have figured something out so I followed you. I was only trying to check if he was still breathing.” 

“And is he?”

“Yes, only just. See the breath is still there on the blade.” Gwaine saw the blade but had a gut feeling that Aggravaine was lying to him. “Come on Gwaine, we need to get him back to Camelot.” 

“So you agree, he was kidnapped?”

“Of course he was. Now help me. Please.” Aggravaine said. Gwaine grudgingly put his sword away and helped get Gaius out of the caves and back to Camelot. At the gates, Lancelot and Percival helped get Gaius inside to lie down, while Gwaine went with Aggravaine to speak to Arthur.

Merlin was still walking through some of the tunnels, when he sensed someone was close by. He quickly hid, hoping whoever it was, didn’t notice him. When the man walked on, Merlin stepped back out only to stop dead in his tracks. Morgana was standing there glaring at him. 

“Hello, Merlin.” she said smirking at him and then blasted him back against the stone wall of the cave. She magicked a dagger to his throat, prepared to drive through him. “When will you learn not to meddle in things you could not possibly understand?”

“Morgana. What have you done to Gaius?” He asked, seething with anger.

“He had some information I needed. The whereabouts of Emrys. If he had given it up willingly, then he wouldn’t suffer.” 

“If you have harmed him-” Merlin started to say.

“Why are we discussing Gaius’ fate, when we should be discussing yours?” She cut him off. “Not if you're going to die in this god-forsaken place, but rather how painfully.” She said with a gleam in her eye. A man came in behind Morgana then. Morgana turned and acknowledged the man. “Alatore, this is Merlin. He’s nothing but a serving boy, but he manages to interfere in my plans too much. I trust your time with Gaius was successful?”

“Yes, Gaius told me everything.” The man said stepping forward and kneeling down in front of Merlin. “Not only do I know who Emrys is, but I know where he is.” He never took his eyes off Merlin.

“Tell me!” Morgana half shouted, half pleaded. 

“Never!” The man growled and blasted her back with his staff. Merlin quickly stood up once the dagger dropped from his throat and backed away from the man. 

“Why did you do that?” He asked.

“Merlin, I am Alatore of the Catha. I am honored to be of service.”

“You have magic!” Merlin exclaimed.

“I understand the burden you carry. I have lived with it all my life. I have been persecuted most of my life, even hunted. I understand what that feels like. From what I learned from Gaius, I do not have your great powers, Merlin. But I share your hopes. I and others like me have dreamt of the world you seek to build and would gladly give our lives to help you do it.” Then Alatore dropped to his knee, bowing to Merlin. Merlin exhaled, feeling like he had been holding his breath. 

“Please, stand. There is no need for that.” Merlin said, walking to the man. When Alatore was on his feet, they walked to the cave entrance. 

“Would you mind walking with me for a while before returning to Camelot?” Alatore asked him.

“No. Not at all.” Merlin said. They walked for a ways and came to Camelot’s border. They made a small fire and sat there in silence for a time. 

“I know you have no reason to trust me. But I swear to you, I will guard your secret with my life.” Alatore said.

“Thank you. It may not seem like it now, but...we will be free one day. We won’t have to fear what makes us special. There are those who know my secret who protect me in Camelot. They wish to see the same thing happen for others like me.”

“Can you show me?” Alatore asked. Merlin thought for a minute, then reached out to the fire. He spoke the words and a dragon rose from the fire. A replica of the Pendragon crest. “It’s beautiful.” He whispered. Merlin smiled. 

“Where will you go now?” Merlin asked.

“I will return to my brotherhood and wait patiently. When the day arrives, where we can be free, I will return, if you would like?”

“Yeah. That would be great.” Merlin answered. Alatore smiled.

“If you are ever in need, send word and I will be there.” Alatore said and stood. “We must be on our way. There’s no telling how long Morgana will be unconscious.” Merlin reached out his hand to Alatore, who shook it.

“I look forward to seeing you again.” Merlin told him. After stomping out the fire, Merlin watched Alatore cross the border. The sky was starting to lighten. He hadn’t realized they had been out all night. With a sigh, he turned and started walking back to Camelot. He knew if he didn’t show up soon, Gwaine would be out searching for him. He smiled. He had never expected to find someone again who made him feel so cared for. After Freya, he was so heartbroken. He had closed himself off to the idea of loving anyone again. Hmm. The sun was shining brightly as he approached the gates of Camelot. He spotted Elyan and Corbett who sent a boy running to the castle as soon as they spotted him. 

“Merlin! Glad to see you back! Aggravaine and Gwaine arrived just before dawn with Gaius. He’s in his chambers, but he did not look well.” Elyan told him. 

“I’ll give him a once over. He’s probably exhausted and needs lots of rest.” Merlin said while he was walking. The Knights had fallen into step beside him. 

“It’s a good thing you made it back when you did. We thought Gwaine was going to race off at any moment to search you out. He was not happy when Arthur told him to wait and give you time to get back on your own.” Corbett added. Merlin chuckled. That sounded like Gwaine. 

“Well I need to get to Gaius. If you see him before me, just let him know I’m back and I’m unharmed. Don’t need him rushing off to try to take on Morgana on his own, now.” 

“Morgana?!” Elyan said, shocked.

Merlin groaned. “Sorry, forget that bit. Er, let’s just say, she got more than she bargained for with who she thought to ask for help. No, I’m not getting into it. Not unless Arthur forces me to. I’d rather keep what happened to myself, at least until I have time to speak with Gaius.”

“Very well. But you know Arthur won’t let it go. Especially when he finds out she was involved.” Corbett said. 

“Is it necessary for you to mention that to him?” Merlin asked, hoping they wouldn’t.

“Absolutely.” Elyan said patting Merlin on the shoulder. Merlin rolled his eyes. 

“Alright. I’ll see you later.” Merlin told them and bounded off to check on Gaius. And to reassure him, that everything turned out fine. He knew he would be beating himself up about it. 

After a few hours, Merlin had spoken with Gaius, Arthur had even come by and apologized, and Gaius was now resting. Merlin used his magic to put the room back in order. repairing jars, putting books and papers back where they belonged, and cleaning the floors. When he was done, he sat down on a stool and pulled the books from his room out. He wanted to look through the Greek tales once more. He had an idea for a story, but wanted a little inspiration. He was so engrossed in the book, he hadn’t noticed that Gwaine had come in and was watching over his shoulder. 

“Can you actually read that?” He asked, startling Merlin, who promptly fell off his stool and on to the floor. Gwaine laughed. “I’m sorry, I didn’t realize you hadn’t heard me come in.” He reached a hand down to help him up.

“It’s fine. I was just caught up, I guess. But, to answer your question, yes, I can read it. There are other languages that are easier, some that are harder, but Greek isn’t so bad. They have a lot of good tales. They called them epics.” Merlin blushed and realized he was rambling. “Sorry, you probably didn’t need all that information.”

“Merls, you never need to apologize for being you. I think it's great. Maybe you can tell me one of these epics one day. Though not right now. I’m actually just coming by to say hello. I’m off the rest of the day and am in desperate need of some sleep.” 

“Mm.” Merlin said, remembering how they had woken up not that long ago.

“What?” He asked. 

“Nothing. Just, sleep sounds nice. If only I could get a break like that.” He chuckled. 

“Merls?”

“Yeah?” 

“Arthur said you can be off the rest of the day too. You still have chores that need done before morning, but he said you can have some time to treat Gaius and rest. Is he fine for you to leave him?”

“Erm. I suppose. Why?”

“Why don’t you come keep me company while I rest?” Merlin blushed again and smiled.

“Alright. I’ll leave Gaius a note. But you better not be lying to me about Arthur letting me off.”

“I’m not, I swear. You can ask Lancelot even. He’ll confirm it.” Merlin was already writing a note while Gwaine was talking. He rolled his eyes. 

“Ok, I believe you.” Merlin said, finishing his note. They walked down the corridors then to Gwaine’s room. He had a bigger, softer bed. When they got there, Gwaine locked the door. Merlin had already removed his boots and laid down. As soon as he was laying down, his eyes were already closed. He didn’t see Gwaine take his boots off and lay down next to him. “Thanks for believing me about Gaius.” Merlin mumbled. 

“Of course.” Gwaine said and ran his hand through Merlin’s hair. Before long, the pair were sound asleep. It had been a very long few days. 


	17. Making Moves

Standing in the clearing, Merlin panted, sweat streaming down his face. He faced off against Corbett and Lancelot. When they came at him, he did what he could to parry and block. They had been going for almost an hour already, and Merlin knew he couldn’t stay standing much longer. He was holding two short swords that Corbett had lent him for the training. Having one in each hand made Merlin feel more balanced than he did with one sword and a shield. Lancelot moved quickly to the side and Corbett went the opposite direction. Merlin finally lost his balance trying to keep in a good defensive position and sprawled on the ground. Before he could get even one of his swords up, the two other men had put their boots on his wrists pinning them down while pointing their swords at his chest. Merlin let go of the swords in his hands and lay there, trying to catch his breath. The Knights sheathed their swords and reached out their hands to help Merlin up. He gladly accepted. Once he was on his feet, Corbet grabbed the short swords. It felt better training in the morning today for Merlin, for some reason.

“You’re doing really well, Merlin.” Corbett told him.

“Thanks. You guys are really not making this easy.” 

“It’s not meant to be easy, Merlin.” Lancelot told him, putting an arm around his shoulders. 

“Fair enough.”

“Do you know if Arthur plans to test you tomorrow?” Corbett asked him.

“Er. I’m not sure. He has something he’s doing today and I think depending how it goes, he may or may not conduct the testing.” Merlin said.

“What’s he doing?” Lancelot asked. 

“Uh, it’s not really my place to say.” 

“He’s doing it finally, isn’t he?” Corbett asked.

“Depending what it is…”

“He’s proposing to Guinevere.” Lancelot clarified.

“That is his plan.” Merlin said.

“It’s about time.” Lancelot said, smiling.

“Honestly, I don't know why he waited this long.” Corbett said. Merlin shrugged. He knew some of why, but he also figured part of it was nerves. 

“I better get going and wash before getting his breakfast. If he says anything about the testing I’ll let you know tonight when I come by.” Merlin said, and ran off.

“How long do you think it will be before Gwaine and Merlin get married, then?” Corbett asked Lancelot with a crooked grin on his face, watching as Merlin disappeared in the castle. Lancelot laughed. And he couldn’t stop. 

“I hadn’t thought of that. Hmm. If they’re anything like Arthur and Gwen, it’ll be another few years. But, I don’t think they are like that. I give it another year before Gwaine makes any formal declarations.” Lancelot said.

“Ah, so you think it’ll be Gwaine, huh? Care to make it a wager?” Corbett asked.

“Absolutely. Though we should get the others in on it. They can’t know about it though.” Lancelot said as they walked to the Knights hall. “What’s your guess then?”

“Ah, well. I’m going to say it’ll be Gwaine as well, making the move. But I don’t think it’ll happen for at least two years.” Corbett said.

“What’ll happen in two years?” Percival asked them as they walked into the hall. Spotting Gwaine in the corner, Corbett and Lancelot shared a look.

“We’ll tell you later.” Lancelot said. 

Merlin rushed down the hall with Arthur’s breakfast. When he walked in the room, he noticed Arthur was already awake and just staring up at the canopy. Merlin walked across the room and drew open the curtains, causing the sun to glare in Arthur’s face. 

“Merlin!” Arthur yelled covering his face with a pillow.

“Morning, Sire.” He said smiling. He then went and grabbed Arthur and drug him out of bed, where he landed promptly on the floor. “Come on, plenty to do today!” Arthur looked like he was going to stay on the floor forever, so Merlin hauled him to his feet. After grabbing one of Arthur’s nicer red shirts, some nice black trousers, the belt and boots, he pulled Arthur to the center of the room and started dressing him. Arthur seemed to be stuck in a daze. After he was dressed he sat down in a chair by the table. 

“Am I doing the right thing, Merlin?” Arthur asked. 

“Arthur?”

“I feel...awful. My stomach feels all twisted. Maybe I’ve come down with something” Arthur said, setting his elbows on his knees and leaning his chin on his hands. 

“Mmm. Indecision.” Merlin said looking back in the wardrobe. “I hope it’s not catching.”

“I’m serious. I feel sick.” Arthur said looking on the verge of a panic episode. 

“Well, that’s marriage for you.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. The thought of spending the rest of your life with someone it’s bound to make you feel under the weather.” Merlin responded. Arthur leaned back in his seat.

“That’s exactly what it is.” Arthur said and then stood up and started pacing. “I’ve made a bad decision.”

“I didn’t say that. I just meant, it’s natural to be nervous.” Merlin said, holding a few of Arthur’s jackets in his arms. “I always get nervous making decisions, thinking about all the other options I’ve discounted. Princess Elena,” He said holding up a coat, watching Arthur’s expression carefully.

“Too...girly.” Arthur said.

“Princess of Westerburg.” Merlin held up another coat.

“Too...short.”

“Queen Guinevere?” He said holding up a final dark coat. Arthur paused and looked at him. His whole body relaxed thinking of Gwen. “See? You are doing the right thing. When will you ask her?”

“This afternoon. Or this evening. Definitely today. You’ll be there should I need you.” Arthur said.

“I will?”

“You will.” Arthur said and walked off. Merlin rolled his eyes and attempted to sort the wardrobe back out. 

After the morning meetings, Arthur had come back to his chambers while Merlin was sharpening his sword, closely followed by Aggravaine. 

“I’ve decided Uncle. I’m going to ask Guinevere to marry me. Today.”

“My Lord?” Aggravaine asked, clearly confused.

“I love her. And I know she loves me. She is beautiful, intelligent and strong. She has provided invaluable counsel in the past.”

“Sire, do I not provide invaluable counsel?” Aggravaine asked. Merlin was turned away from the pair so he was able to show his disgust for the man without being seen. Arthur turned and looked at his uncle.

“I fear you have too much stubble to be my wife.” Arthur said, keeping a straight face. Merlin scoffed then coughed to cover it up. 

“But, Sire,” Aggravaine started to say.

“No. I want Guinevere to be my Queen and I want you to accept that.” Arthur said walking over to his Uncle and then heading back out of the room. Aggravaine left a moment behind Arthur. Merlin felt the man’s eyes boring into his back. He wondered if Aggravaine blamed him for Arthur’s choice. Merlin worked to quickly finish his chores as he knew Arthur planned to propose in Gwen’s house. He had been told to go early and ensure the setting was romantic. Gwaine had said he was a romantic, so he guessed that meant he could sort something out. 

As much as Merlin hadn’t wanted to be involved in Arthur’s proposal, he knew Arthur would not relax unless he helped. So. He set up candles all over Gwen’s house and spent most of an hour lighting them all. He didn’t want to use magic for this. He also made a bouquet and placed it on the table tied with a red ribbon. He had just lit the last candle and heard Arthur at the door. He quickly ducked out the back and around to the side to peek in the window. Arthur saw him, and smiled, thankful his friend was there with him. Gwen was led into the house where Arthur removed her blindfold. Gwen gasped and put her hands to her mouth. Merlin, keeping hidden, couldn’t help but smile at her reaction. Arthur brought her to the center of the room and went down on his knee. Merlin blushed furiously hearing what Arthur was confessing to Gwen. He felt like he should not be hearing this. It was very intimate. When Gwen cried and told him yes, Merlin couldn’t stop his smile. He was so happy for his friends. He was getting ready to leave when he heard Gwen call out. He peeked back in the window and she thanked him. Arthur then did the same. Merlin raised his eyebrows at him and then walked back to the castle, smiling the whole way. The sun had settled with barely any light left in the sky. Still grinning like a fool he headed to the Knights hall to tell them what happened. When he was walking through the corridor, he was pulled roughly into an alcove. 

“There has to be a better way to get my attention” he said as he was pressed back against the wall. 

“Maybe. But this way was fun. What’s got you so happy?” Gwaine asked him, not letting him off the wall.

“Oh, nothing much. I was just coming to the Knights hall to tell everyone anyway.” Merlin said, putting his hands on Gwaine’s waist.

“Is that so?” Gwaine asked, grinning, moving in closer to him.

“Absolutely.” Merlin said, pulling him in the rest of the way until their lips met. Right then, there was a cough from the corridor. 

“You do know you aren’t that far from your room, Gwaine?” Leon teased.

“Just a quick stolen moment is all. We were headed to see everyone anyway. Are the Knights all in the hall?” Merlin asked.

“Yes, that they are.” Leon answered.

“Great. Let’s go.” Merlin said, turning Gwaine around and heading the rest of the way down the corridor. As soon as they walked in the hall, the room went quiet. Merlin tilted his head curiously.

“Were you talking about us?” Merlin asked.

“No” several said at the same time. This time even Gwaine raised an eyebrow. 

Lancelot cleared his throat, the first to recover, “what brings you to us this evening, Merlin?”

“Just wanted to share the exciting news. Arthur proposed to Gwen!” He said smiling brightly as everyone cheered. 

“Finally!” Elyan yelled. This caused some laughter. Merlin then watched as Gwaine collected some coins from a few of the Knights. When Gwaine saw Merlin watching he just shrugged and smiled.

“Do you know if Arthur is going to test you tomorrow?” Corbett asked. 

“No, he isn’t. He is planning a week of festivities to celebrate his engagement that will culminate in the wedding.” Merlin told him.

“I guess that means I get to test you then.” Leon said ruffling Merlin’s hair. 

“If you must.” Merlin said grinning at him.

“I think it’s quite necessary.” Corbett said. 

“You’ve improved much, but it doesn’t hurt to test where you are now. Besides I’m certain you will surprise our dear Leon.” Lancelot added, winking at him. Merlin rolled his eyes. 

“Alright. Well I’m going to turn in then, since you won’t let me out of it.” He said and left. There were many shouts telling him goodnight and a few more hands that ruffled his hair as he got away from the group. When he got back to the physician’s chambers he told Gaius the good news before heading to bed. This week was going to be very busy for him. He went to his room and lay down, ready for sleep. As his eyes closed, though, he felt an unnatural tug of dark magic not far from Camelot. He gasped, and a burst of energy rushed out of him as if preparing to defend him. He couldn’t move. He lay there and reached out with his magic to see if he could determine what was nearby that would cause this outburst of dark magic. He only felt traces, and couldn’t find the source. There was a knock on his door. 

“Yes?” He said, voice cracking.

“Merlin? You ok?” Gwaine asked from the door.

“I’m fine. Sorry about that. I didn’t have any control over it.” He said not ready to open his eyes just yet, still disturbed.

“Merlin, what did you feel?” He asked, coming in and kneeling next to the bed.

“Dark magic.” Merlin murmured. 

“Should we be worried?”

“I don’t know. I can’t find where it came from. When I sensed it, my magic just sort of burst out of me.” He shuddered. “I promise I’ll let you know when I can figure out what it was. You should go get some sleep. I know you’re going to be in the tournament that Arthur is holding for his wedding celebrations. You need your rest.” Merlin told him, still not opening his eyes. 

“One condition. Look at me.” Gwaine said. Merlin gulped and turned his head to the other man. He opened his eyes and he knew from Gwaine’s quick breath that they were golden. “Get some rest yourself. I’m looking forward to seeing how you do in the morning.” Gwaine then touched his forehead to Merlin’s and left. 

When Gwaine made it back to the Knights hall, the others were anxiously waiting. He grinned at the look on their faces. After everyone felt the energy pass over them, they knew that something had happened with Merlin. The others had all just looked to Gwaine, who rolled his eyes and went to check on him.

“Well?” Percival asked, breaking the tense silence. 

“Well, what?” Gwaine asked.

“You know what. Is something wrong? He hasn’t let out any energy like that in quite some time. What does it mean? Did he tell you?” Lancelot pursued.

“All I can tell you is that he said dark magic was used near Camelot. He couldn’t find where it came from, nor what it’s purpose was.” Gwaine told them.

“I don’t like it.” Leon said looking down. “Everytime his magic reacts like this, something happens.” Just then, Arthur walked in. They had all tried to push their worry aside and cheer for their King. He just held up his hand to stop them.

“So, you all know. That’s good. I figured Merlin would tell you right away.” Arthur paused, looking expectantly at the gathered Knights. “Anyone care to tell me what happened with him?”

“It’s nothing you need to worry about, Sire. We’ll keep an eye on him over the coming days to see what comes of it. You should be resting and preparing!” Lancelot said, grinning at him. Arthur nodded.

“You’ll let me know as soon as he figures out what it means.” Arthur directed. He made sure to meet everyone’s gaze, before turning and leaving. 

“I don’t think Merlin is going to appreciate having a shadow again.” Gwaine said, still facing the door.

“No, he will not. Hopefully Arthur will be keeping him busy enough that he won’t notice.” Corbett said. Though he had not known Merlin long, he was already fiercely protective of him. 

“We should all get some rest. I believe this promises to be an interesting week.” Lancelot said, and then headed off to his room.The others followed suit. 

*******

After Arthur had spoken, briefly, with Aggravaine at midday, the man had ridden to Morgana to deliver the news. To say that she was upset, was an understatement. Her dreams, visions, of the future where Gwen sat on the throne with Arthur were coming true. Something had to be done to prevent this. She decided her course of action was to sabotage the upcoming nuptials. She went in search of the Dochraid. The Dochraid is a creature of the Old Religion, and Morgana knew she would help her. When Morgana arrived at the cave the creature dwelled in, she entered and found the creature resembled an old woman. Well, an old woman who had skin that had covered where her eyes were meant to be and pointed crooked teeth. The Dochraid could tell much about a person by sniffing their hands. It was a strange greeting, but in doing so she was able to sense the magic of the person. 

“You know why I am here.” Morgana said. 

“You seek to prevent Guinevere from being crowned Queen.” the Dochraid affirmed. 

“The throne is rightfully mine. She does not deserve it.” Morgana was barely controlling her anger. The Dochraid turned her back and pulled something from the back of the cave. It was a medallion of some sort. 

“Take this to the lake of Avalon and toss it in the waters while reciting these words. One who held Guinevere’s heart before Arthur, will return. You need only enhance Guinevere’s lingering feelings, and she will betray her King, leaving him broken. Your time to take your throne is approaching.” She finished, handing over the medallion. Morgana took it gladly, and smiled her menacing smile. She would have her throne back soon enough. 

She rode off on a horse she had acquired, heading straight for the Lake of Avalon. When she arrived, night had already fallen. She tossed in the medallion and chanted the words given to her by the Dochraid. After a moment, the water began to bubble and a man stood up. He was tall, taller than Arthur, and he had a muscular build that made him look like he was familiar with manual labor. His strawberry blonde hair stopped just above his shoulders. He was completely nude, but this didn’t affect Morgana. The man approached her and bowed. 

“My lady.” He said.

“What is your name?” Morgana asked, already knowing the answer.She knew the man from when she was much younger. Before Gwen had come to work as her maidservant in the castle. 

“My name is Theodrid.” He said, still not looking up.

“Come, Theodrid. We have much to do.” She said and headed back to her horse. She grabbed a cloak and had him put it on. Morgana couldn’t help but smile. This was going to be fun. 

Theodrid, or Theo as Gwen had called him, had been a young man who worked in the forge with Gwen’s father. He was apprenticed to him. Theo and Gwen had grown quite close, but the young man had to leave as his family was killed. Being a young man, he was sent to live with relatives that lived over the border in Essitir. Cenred’s kingdom. He had been forced into the immortal Army and had perished when they were defeated. Though Morgana was certain Gwen had not known that. When they arrived at her dwelling, her hovel to be precise, she brought the man inside and provided him with clothes. He sat in front of a fire and closed his eyes. Morgana chanted another spell that brought back his memories of his time with Gwen and how close they had been, as well as everything that happened after. When he opened his eyes again, he took in a breath. She was fascinated by his eyes. They were mostly blue, but one had an almost hazel color in it as well.

“Do you remember?” She asked him.

“I remember everything. What is it you wish me to do, my lady?” He asked her, no emotions on his chiseled face. 

“I want you to present this gift to Guinevere. As a wedding present. And then I want you to woo her. She cannot marry Arthur.” Morgana said. She presented Theo with a bracelet that she had enchanted to enhance the feelings that once existed between Gwen and Theo. “Now rest. You shall start in the morning.” The man nodded his acquiescence and lay down. Morgana had not known that in summoning the dead man she had sent a ripple of dark magic to Camelot alerting Emrys something was coming. 

When morning came, Merlin had a massive headache. He stood to dress and head out for his testing, hoping to get it over with quickly and get on with the celebrations that Arthur had prepared. He stumbled into his training clothes and then out the doors to the clearing he trained in. When he got there, he knew he was early so he decided to let his magic loose a little. He took a deep breath in and released it, raising his hands at his sides, as if guiding the magic. Feeling around, he sensed the Knights making their way out of the castle on their way to the clearing. He reached further and found a strange man walking toward Camelot. He tried to focus on the man, but it caused a sharp pain to flare in his head. 

“Dah!” Merlin tried to keep the groan in, but it escaped his lips. He put the palms of his hands on his temples and tried to relax his focus. He felt around the man to see what he could discover. Dark magic resided in him. He didn’t recognize the man. When he tried to see the man’s appearance, a sharp pain would spike in his head. The Knights were all standing in the clearing now surrounding him. Merlin pulled his magic back and breathed out dispersing another gust of energy. He heard the Knights around him gasp. His head was definitely aching. “Sorry” he said, opening his eyes and looking at the Knights.

“No worries. Care to share?” Corbett asked, bringing out the two short swords they had practiced with that week. 

“Erm, not much to share really. After last night, I woke up with a headache. I thought if I came out here early enough I could try figuring out what it was. I found a man, I think it was a man, walking toward Camelot. But...he is not what he seems. There is some sort of dark magic surrounding him. And in him. I couldn’t see what he looked like.” Merlin said, taking the swords.

“If you are around this person again, you will tell one of us.” Leon stated getting into a stance.

“Of course. The last thing I need is you all following me around all day, again, because of one of my funny feelings.” He said sarcastically, holding the swords out to his sides in a mock bow.

“As long as you understand.” Leon said and launched himself at Merlin. As Leon attacked from the front, Elyan was behind him stepping in for an occasional swing. Merlin moved almost without thought. His body had absorbed the movements he practiced over and over, drilled into him for months. His movements were fluid and graceful. Merlin was able to disarm Elyan, but Leon continued to batter him. Lancelot jumped in as Elyan stepped out, attacking just as Leon was. Merlin was able to disarm Leon, but just as he had knocked the sword away, Lancelot had knocked his feet out from under him and Merlin was staring up at the sky with a sword pointing at his chest. Lancelot sheathed his sword and helped Merlin to his feet, patting his arm. Merlin was breathing heavily, sweat was dripping down his face. He pulled his shirt off and wiped his face, to clear his eyes. He tossed his shirt at Gwaine, who grabbed it out of the air. Percival came forward for the hand-to-hand. Merlin wasn’t as skilled at this, but he still held his own. For a little while anyway. Percival was still much more skilled than Merlin. As he lay pinned to the ground, he struggled to catch his breath. Percival helped him up. They were only testing these skills for now, because he had nothing more he could learn for knife throwing and he wasn’t really interested in crossbow. Merlin decided to practice a little magic, since he was already showing some of what he learned, why not a little more? He stretched his arms to the side and focused his mind and steadied his breathing. He pushed out and a golden shield formed around the group. Merlin then brought his hands in front of him and said some words that caused his eyes to burn a bright gold. He threw one hand in the air and tendrils of gold reached out and wrapped each of the Knights tightly. He pulled his hand down and was holding a lead from each tendril. He grinned at the next part he was going to do. He whispered some words and wove some plants and flowers together making a crown for each Knight. As he placed one on each of their heads, six crowns on six protesting Knights of the Round Table. Merlin knelt to the ground and gathered the magic he had surrounded them with and stood suddenly shooting a hand in the air. The magic shot up and burst out in every direction, raining golden light around them. As soon as he did this, Merlin fell to a knee, heaving for breath again. Gwaine was the first to come up to him and pull him to his feet. Merlin nodded, silently thanking him. 

“Were the crowns really necessary, Merls?” Gwaine asked, smirking at him. 

“Absolutely.” He said, smiling back. 

“I have to say, Merlin, you are quite the impressive swordsman now. I’d like to see you go against the King.” Leon said, arms crossed.

“I don’t think so.” Merlin said, too worn out to blush.

“You are better with two short swords than with a sword and a shield.” Lancelot added.

“Are you going to compete in the tournament this week?” Corbett asked him, fingering his crown. 

“No. no, I am not. I’m going to help Arthur and stay in the background.” Merlin said grabbing his shirt back from Gwaine, though not putting it on. The group started to walk back to the castle enjoying the brisk morning air. Merlin grinned when he looked back at his friends who were still wearing their flower crowns. 

“Merlin, when are you planning on those throwing lessons you agreed to help with?” Eoin asked.

“Erm. Dunno. When would you like to?” 

“Well, Arthur is going to be busy all morning with his announcement and receiving guests and gifts, so he won’t be at training. How about you come by the training grounds after you get the King fed and on his way, yeah?” Corbett said, walking close enough to brush shoulders with him.

“Sure. I can probably do that.” Merlin said smiling at the Knight. When had he gotten so comfortable with him? Not that he minded by any means.

“Well go get washed and see to the King. It’s a big day for him. He’s probably going to be all nerves for the next week.” Leon said and gave him a playful shove. Merlin huffed a small laugh. He waved at the group and ran off. 

“Should we have told him to put his shirt back on?” Gwaine asked, staring hungrily in the direction Merlin had run off to. 

“And miss the look on your face? And all these people that haven’t moved since seeing him? Including that fellow and serving girl who just dropped their buckets and linens?” Elyan asked sarcastically. 

“Don’t forget that lady over there who is fanning herself uncontrollably.” Lancelot pointed out. 

“Hmm. Do you think he knows how attractive he looks to people?” Gwaine asked, curiously. 

“Doubtful. Merlin doesn’t really think of himself that way.” Corbett said. Gwaine glanced at him. He wasn’t sure he liked the closeness that was developing between him and Merlin. “Stop it, Gwaine.” 

“Stop what?” 

“Stop thinking whatever you are thinking. He just reminds me of my brother. He was killed when that immortal Army attacked. Merlin is just so...innocent. He reminds me of how my brother used to be. That is all.” Corbett said looking at him.

“I didn’t mean to bring back unpleasant memories. I’m sorry.” Gwaine said quietly.

“Nothing to be sorry for.” Corbett said smiling. “Now! Let's get some breakfast before our training starts.” 

Gwaine decided to detour and see Merlin before training. He knew this week would be long for his...what should he call him? Friend? Lover? Anyway, he wanted to see his Merlin before he didn’t see him for the next week. When he walked in the main physician’s chambers, they were empty. He went up to Merlin’s small room and found him there in his underclothes, water dripping from his hair, back to the door. He let out a low whistle, causing Merlin to jump and turn to see who was in his room. 

“Gwaine. What, uh, what are you doing in here? I thought you all were going to get breakfast?” Merlin asked nervously.

“You see, Merlin, I couldn’t think about food. All I keep seeing is you swinging two swords around and disarming two out of three Knights. Your movements were...fluid. Graceful. Powerful. And very attractive.” He said stepping further into the room with each word and pinning Merlin against the desk. “You then walked back to the castle, no shirt on. Do you have any idea how many people were stopping and staring at your gorgeous self?” Gwaine asked leaning forward and placing his hands on the top of the desk, effectively cutting off any potential escape. 

“Erm. I, er, I hadn’t noticed I guess.” Merlin said, face turning a scarlet color. He was having trouble functioning due to his current state of dress, or undress, and the feeling of Gwaine pressed up against him.

“Well. I’m telling you now. You are a beautiful, handsome, gorgeous, chiseled, human being. And you are no longer allowed to be seen in public without a shirt on. Maybe even a jacket.” Gwaine said.

“Is that why you’re in here, then?” Merlin asked, head tilting slightly. A grin creeping across his face, trying not to stare at the lips of the other man.

“No. But it did make a good excuse to catch you near naked.” Gwaine said, arms touching Merlin’s sides, hands moving from the desk to his body. Merlin raised an eyebrow at him. Not giving him time to do anything else Gwaine leaned in to Merlin until the other was sitting on the desk, and kissed him. Merlin didn’t fight it. He wrapped his legs behind Gwaine’s and pulled him close, then ran his hands up under his shirt. Gwaine quickly removed his shirt. He ran his hands up Merlin’s muscular back, while Merlin tangled his hands in Gwaine’s hair. Merlin then pushed up off the desk and the next thing Gwaine knew, they were on the small bed, Merlin on top of him. Things had heated up quite quickly. Gwaine knew Merlin was not as experienced as he was and didn’t want to push anything. But he wasn’t sure how much longer he could hold out on that ideal. Gwaine couldn’t think as Merlin kissed down his neck, down his chest. He was breathing heavily. 

“Merlin” he called, voice husky.

“Gwaine” the other responded, equally breathless.

“I don’t think we have time for whatever it is you’re planning to do.”

“So, you want me to stop?” He asked, coming back up to rest his hands on either side of Gwaine’s head. His lithe body pinning him down.

“I didn’t say that. But. I don’t want you to do anything you aren’t ready for.” He said breathy. He noticed a twinkle in the other’s eye.

“Why, Sir Gwaine. Are you worried about my innocence?” He asked cheekily.

“Absolutely. Though the way you say that makes me wonder who the corruptor really is.” 

“Oh, it’s definitely you. But I’m not completely inexperienced in some things.” He said.

“I think it’s you going to get me in trouble.” Gwaine said smiling and rolling on top of Merlin. They kissed some more, hands roaming freely. Gwaine was getting greedy and moved down Merlin’s neck and to his chest, as was done to him, but kept moving lower. Merlin couldn’t think, and he felt his magic stirring, as well as other things.

“Gwaine. My magic.” Merlin said barely audible. Gwaine continued, enjoying making Merlin squirm. Though Merlin wasn’t inexperienced in these situations, it had been a very long time. He thought he was prepared for how his body and magic would react to the intimacy. Merlin tried to focus on the ceiling or anything, but Gwaine was very good at what he was doing to him. Finally unable to hold back anymore, Merlin’s magic burst out a wave of euphoria as he moaned. Damn. There was not going to be a way to pretend anyone hadn’t felt that. Gwaine was laughing. “Not. Funny.” Merlin said, still breathless. But then he too was laughing along with Gwaine. Neither wanted to get up. They knew if they didn’t that someone would be in any minute to find them. Merlin got up and dressed, losing his balance a few times. Gwaine threw his shirt back on, trying not to laugh at Merlin’s wild hair. His eyes were still shining with little flecks of gold in them. They left the room together, parting in the corridor. Though not before a see you later kiss that might have been longer than necessary. Gwaine went to get his armor for training, a smile not leaving his face. 

Merlin couldn’t hide his smile either as he retrieved Arthur’s breakfast from the kitchen. Diana spotted his hair and smile and narrowed her eyes at him. He blushed at her attention. She came over and smacked his shoulder playfully, expecting details. Merlin rushed off promising to talk to her later. When he got to Arthur’s room, the King was already up and sitting at his desk. Merlin went and placed the tray, laden with as much fruit, cheese, meat, and bread as he could get. He hoped this arrangement of foods would keep him from prodding. Merlin opened the curtains and went to the wardrobe to grab some finery out for receiving guests. He continued his chores through the room, making the bed, picking up dirty clothes, setting the armor and sword on the table so he could take it to clean and sharpen. 

“Merlin.” Arthur said.

“Arthur.” Merlin responded, not looking at his King. 

“Anything interesting happen this morning?” He asked, hiding his mouth behind his hand. 

“No. Not really. The Knights asked me to lead their training session for throwing blades after testing me this morning.” Merlin said grabbing up the gathered armor and sword in his arms. 

“Mmm. That’s it?” He prodded.

“Mmhmm.” Merlin mumbled.

“ _ Mer- _ lin.” Arthur said.

“ _ Ar _ -thur.” Merlin responded in kind. Arthur stood up and came to stand right next to Merlin.

“You need to find a way to reign in any...involuntary...magic...releases. It is a little distracting for the rest of us.” Arthur said smiling crookedly at Merlin’s reddening ears.

“I...will...work on it.” Merlin said and cleared his throat.

“Good. Make sure you don’t take it too easy on them with the blades. If they can even get half as good as you I’ll take it. Off you go.” Arthur said and went back to his breakfast. Merlin let out a breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding and left the room, hearing Arthur chuckle at his discomfort. He ran and dropped the armor and sword off in his room and headed down to the training field. When he got there, his stomach rumbled, loudly. He hadn’t realized he had forgotten to eat anything. Merlin was standing behind the Knights when his stomach made that noise. They turned around a little startled by the sound. Some laughed, but Gwaine actually tossed him an apple. Merlin caught it and turned bright red. He’d been reading Greek literature lately and apples symbolized something he was sure the Knight hadn’t thought of. He quickly masked his face and nodded at him thankfully. He started to munch while the rest of the Knights were gathering. When he had finished the apple and looked up, he found the Round Table Knights all staring at him with knowing smiles on their faces. 

“Yes?” Merlin asked.

“Anything you want to tell us about from this morning Merlin?” Lancelot asked, though he looked as if he was trying to hold in laughter. 

“No, I don’t believe I do.” He said grinning at the Knights, who burst out laughing. Percival was laughing so hard he actually fell to the ground, causing more laughter. The other Knights and trainees were staring at the group with confused looks on their faces. Merlin rolled his eyes. “Alright, you lot, get it together. You can gossip later.” Merlin said and winked at Gwaine who beamed at him. “So, I’m not sure how long I have before Arthur will come searching for me, so let's do what we can while we can. Leon, do you want to gather everyone, or must I?”

“I’ll get them lined up.” Leon said, wiping tears from his face. He let out a loud whistle and got everyone lined up in front of the targets. When Merlin walked to the front he had each man hold the blade they planned to throw; he then goes one by one to watch each throw a single blade and then gives them some correction. Their next throw is better. Once he gets through everyone one time, he has them all throw in unison. He goes through and gives more advice individually. They all throw again and many notice a drastic improvement in their form and the feel of the throw. Smiles lighting up their faces as they are successful. Merlin glanced up at the castle when he felt like he was being watched. Arthur was standing at his window watching. Merlin nodded to him and the nod was returned. Turning back to the Knights he had them each throw three more.Every blade landing in the center circles of their targets. The Knights all cheered. 

“Merlin, would you show us?” A new trainee asked, looking kind of awestruck.

“Yes, Merlin. Your turn.” Eoin said holding up the blindfold. Merlin rolled his eyes. 

“Very well. Do you want me to just throw at the standing targets or are you going to be launching some?” Merlin asked, taking the blindfold.

“Let’s do three on the targets, three moving.” Eoin told him.

“Alright then.” Merlin swiftly pulled out three blades and sunk them in three targets, dead center before some of them even took a single breath. When three targets were launched, one right after another, he didn’t hesitate and heard the blades all land. When he removed the blindfold, the others were just staring at him.

“What?” He asked, confused at their expressions.

“Is that something you can teach us, too?” The young trainee asked. Travis! That was his name. 

“Perhaps. But keep working what we went over today. Perfect your stance, your aim, your breathing, everything we went over. And, maybe, I’ll help you work towards moving targets while not looking.” He said retrieving his blades. When he turned around the trainees had all rushed forward and tackled him to the ground. He hadn’t expected this and the Knights of the Round Table just laughed. He even spotted Arthur laughing from his window, before turning away. When they finally cleared away, Gwaine came over and pulled him to his feet and brushed the grass out of his disheveled hair. He drug a lingering finger down Merlin’s jawline, causing him to blush. 

“Alright, you two, that’s enough.” Corbett joked. This caused even more laughter from the rest. Merlin rolled his eyes. It was already midday, and Merlin needed to get Arthur some lunch. 

“I’ve gotta go anyway. Someone has to make sure the King eats so he doesn’t chew anyone’s head off.” Merlin ran off from the group to some catcalling and more laughter. 


	18. Banishment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Festivities for the King's engagement continue, but dark magic disrupts more than just the celebrations.

After another day, the festivities and tournament had gotten underway. Knights participated in sword fighting, jousting, and archery contests. Merlin Stayed by Arthur’s side, reassuring him and helping him with his armor between contests. Gwen sat up in a high backed chair on a dais. The pair practically radiated love across the field from each other. On the afternoon of the third day, they were receiving more guests and gifts, Merlin standing on the opposite side of the room so that Arthur could see him where he was able to give encouraging nods. Arthur would visibly relax and smile when he saw Merlin reassuring him. He knew he was doing the right thing, marrying Gwen. He was just anxious. Watching Merlin, he noticed the younger man suddenly reach up and brace his palms on his head and wincing as if in sudden pain. He noticed blood drip from Merlin’s nose and the man paled, if possible, more than usual. Arthur’s face dropped and he stood suddenly preparing to go to him. Seeing Arthur stand, brought the attention of the Knights in the room to follow his glance. Merlin was swaying now, blood running down his nose and soaking in his shirt. Right as his knees gave way and he collapsed, Lancelot had gotten to him, followed quickly by Corbett. 

“Get him to Gaius, quickly!” Arthur called, anxiety plain on his face and in his voice.

“Sire.” Lancelot acknowledged. The two men, one on each side of Merlin, began half-carrying, half-guiding him down the corridors. 

“Go tell Sir Gwaine that Merlin is unwell. He should be on the training grounds.” Gwen told one of the serving girls. The girl bowed and ran out of the hall. Gwen grabbed Arthur’s hand and sat him back down in the chair next to hers. “He will be fine.” She assured him, trying to hide her own distress. Arthur nodded at her, not trusting his voice not to betray him. After the excitement died down, the procession of citizens and their gifts and well wishes continued. When the next man entered the room, Gwen gasped. Arthur looked up to see who it was. He vaguely recognized the man, but only vaguely. 

“Theo” Gwen said and rushed up to hug the man. He smiled at her accepting the hug. When she backed away, he grabbed her hand and placed a kiss on it. He then turned to the King and bowed.

“Sire. I wanted to ensure I was able to offer my congratulations as well as my well wishes for your upcoming union.” Theo said after releasing Gwen’s hand and she had returned to Arthur’s side. 

“Thank you. You seem familiar. Have we met before?” He asked.

“Maybe, Sire. My name is Theodrid. I used to apprentice to Gwen’s father many years ago. When my family was killed, I was still a boy so I had to go to my cousins in Cenred’s kingdom.” Theo said.

“Theodrid. Right. I’m glad to see you weren’t a casualty of Morana and Morgause’s immortal army. Please enjoy the tournament while you’re here. Perhaps we will see you again at the feast after the festivities.” Arthur said, smiling at the man.

“Of course, Sire.” The man bowed and left the room. After a few more well wishers, Arthur excused himself to go check on Merlin. He needed to know what happened. When he got to the physician’s chambers, he didn’t knock, just walked in. The room was in chaos. Arthur stopped just inside the door trying to take it all in. Gaius was trying to quickly prepare some potion, Gwaine and Lancelot were holding Merlin down as his whole body was shaking violently, and Corbett was trying to assist Gaius. 

“What is going on?!” Arthur demanded.

“Arthur, help hold him down!” Lancelot directed him. “We need to keep him still until Gaius can administer the sleeping draught.” Arthur ran over quickly and put his hands on Merlin’s legs trying to keep him from flailing around too much. Once Gaius was done with the potion, Corbett quickly tilted Merlin’s head and poured it down his throat. The boy stopped seizing almost instantly. There was no wave of relief that washed out from him this time. This worried Arthur. Not as much as the blood that still trickled from his nose. Gwaine grabbed a wet cloth and began to clean his face, hands shaking slightly. Corbett took the cloth from him forcing him to look up. Gwaine nodded at him and then grabbed Merlin’s hand in his and interlaced their fingers. Arthur could see he was barely holding it together. Corbett rinsed the cloth and then began cleaning Merlin’s face of the remaining blood. Taking a clean cloth dipped in warm water, he placed it on the unconscious boy's head. Arthur noticed each man’s actions and what they meant. Corbett was caring for Merlin like an ailing child, he must see him as the brother he lost. He was glad for that. Lancelot had always been protective of Merlin. Sort of like an older brother, but also...not. And Gwaine. Arthur could see that the Knight loved Merlin. Though Arthur wasn’t sure if Gwaine had realized it himself yet. 

“Gaius, do you know what could have caused this?” Arthur asked.

“I do not, Sire.” 

“Dark magic.” Gwaine growled.

“Come again?” Arthur said.

“A few days ago, Merlin said he had felt dark magic. He said trying to figure out the source had given him a massive headache. If I were to bet, I’d say the source was very close to him to cause this kind of reaction.” Lancelot clarified. Arthur stood up then, running a hand through his hair. Not now. Of all times, it had to be when he was getting married. He needed some fresh air. 

“Send for me as soon as he wakes.” Arthur pointed at the group surrounding Merlin.

“Of course.” Lancelot nodded. After Arthur left, Lancelot motioned Corbett and Gaius over to the other side of the room, to give Gwaine some time with Merlin.

“I think it’s safe to say that the magic that is affecting him is nearby. Unfortunately, we will not be able to figure out where, or who, it’s coming from without Merlin. Do you know if he will recover soon?” Lancelot asked Gaius.

“I’m not sure. The sleeping draught I have to make specially for him. It would keep any other person who took it asleep for at least three or four days. With Merlin it’ll last maybe half a day. All we can do is wait.” Gaius said looking back at his boy.

“We should get back to the others. Or rather, I should. Can you keep an eye on Gwaine? I know he cares deeply for Merlin, even if he won’t admit it yet. I do believe he’s found someone to tie him down, keep him centered so to speak.” Corbett says with a small smile.

“That he has.” Lancelot said and glanced over at Gwaine, who was clearly not handling this well. A small trickle of blood had started out of Merlin’s nose again. The two Knights left the physician and made their way to their respective destinations. Gaius turned to the Knight who remained, who was tenderly wiping sweat from Merlin’s brow. 

When Arthur returned to the small hall they were greeting guests in, Gwen smiled sweetly at him and gave him a chaste kiss. Merlin was important to both of them. She looked at him expectantly, waiting to hear how her best friend was doing.

“Gaius gave him a sleeping draught. He thinks he will recover. But...the timing...is...unsettling.” The pair sat down together again after Arthur told her the news. 

Corbett had reentered shortly after Arthur, going to stand by the other Knights who were all looking anxious. Even the newer recruits. Arthur was amazed that Merlin had made such an impact on the citizens. He dreaded to think where they might be without him. Corbett nodded at Arthur, trying to reassure him. As evening approached they headed back out to the tournament field and Arthur sat with Gwen on the dais while watching the archery semi-finals. When darkness was falling, everyone went back to the castle for another feast. Arthur and Gwen watched as their friends celebrated their upcoming nuptials and stared adoringly into each other's eyes. At times, it was almost as if they were alone in the room. The occasional cheers for a kiss would go through the room, prompting the couple. When the feast was over, Arthur had Percival, Eoin, and Leon escort Gwen home so he knew she was safe. 

Gwen said goodnight to her friends and went into her house, a smile stuck on her face. She hung her shawl up and jumped when she heard a knock on her door. For a moment, she hoped that it was someone coming to tell her that her best friend was fine and that he would be back to smiling at her and telling her his secrets before the next day was out. When she opened the door, though, she found Theo standing there. Her heart did an involuntary flip. It had been so long since she had seen him. He had been her first love, and when he had moved away, it had broken her heart. Seeing him again brought back unwanted feelings. She loved Arthur. She was marrying him. 

“Guinevere. I apologize for coming to see you at this late hour. But I wanted to give you something. I made it at my forge. A present for your upcoming wedding.” He said and handed her an intricate and delicate looking silver bracelet.

“It’s beautiful.” Gwen said, accepting it and putting it on her wrist. “Thank you, Theo. I hope we get to spend some time together tomorrow.” She found herself saying. “It has been too long.”

“I agree. Perhaps I’ll come by the tournament. There are two more days left, yes? I’ll come by and we can chat between events.” He said looking intently into Gwen’s eyes. 

“That sounds lovely. Have a good night.” She said and closed the door as Theo gave her a slight bow and headed into the growing darkness. Gwen felt a warmth rising in her cheeks. Why was she flushed all of a sudden. Strange. She went to bed that night determined to enjoy her last nights in her home before moving into the castle. 

After night had fallen, Merlin began to stir. He started opening his eyes and groaned, covering them quickly trying to shut out the light from the room. Gwaine, Gaius, and Lancelot were instantly by his side. Gwaine helped him to sit up and handed him a cup with some water in it. 

“How are you feeling?” Gaius asked sitting on the opposite side as Gwaine. 

“Great.” He said sarcastically. “Feels like my brain was stung by a hundred bees.” He said, trying to open his eyes again, wincing a little from the light, but able to keep his eyes open this time. 

“You gave everyone a good scare when you started bleeding from your nose suddenly.” Lancelot said.

“Yeah, sorry about that. That magic was...very dark. I felt it when it entered the castle but I couldn’t stave off the effect it had on me. The closer it got, the more my head felt like it was splitting open. Is Arthur alright?” Merlin asked, looking at the faces around him.

“Arthur is fine. I’ll go fetch him. He wanted to see you as soon as you woke.” Lancelot said, and headed for the door. “Merlin?”

“Yeah, Lance?” I’m glad you’re ok.” he said.

“Yeah, me too.” Merlin said, smiling at the other man as he left. 

“Are you sure you’re alright?” Gwaine asked softly, touching his cheek. Merlin leaned in to the touch and closed his eyes.

“I’m fine. You’re here with me.” Merlin said, opening his eyes and meeting Gwaine’s worried gaze. 

“Merls, I don’t think I could see you like that again. You were shaking so badly we...we were all worried you might have some serious brain injury and that you might not wake.” Gwaine said. Merlin grabbed his hand. 

“I’m fine. I promise. Or I will be. The further the source of the magic is away, the better I feel. It’s back outside the city walls now, so I’m fine. If it comes back in the citadel, though, I don’t know what’ll happen. I’ll try to warn you if I feel it close, but I can’t promise that. Maybe it’s a good idea that one of you all stays with me.” Merlin said.

“So now you want a shadow?” Gwaine said, raising an eyebrow at him. Merlin chuckled. Arthur and Lancelot came in just then.

“Arthur.” Merlin said and smiled at his friend. “Hope I didn’t ruin the mood.” 

“Well, you could have been a little less dramatic about it.” Arthur said, grinning back and coming to stand by his feet. 

“I’ll work on that.” Merlin said, still smiling.

“Should I be worried?” Arthur asked, suddenly serious.

“I don’t know.” Merlin said, smile dropping. “I don’t know what the purpose of this...this..spell is. Anytime I feel it, my head wants to split open. I can’t focus on it, and I can’t figure out what it is trying to do.”

“He’s said we can shadow him again, until we can figure out what’s going on.” Gwaine said turning and looking at Arthur. He raised an eyebrow worthy of Gaius at this. 

“Really? You’ll willingly let the Knights tail you around?” Arthur asked.

“I kind of need them to. If it gets too near and I can’t get away, I’ll end up a bleeding mess on the ground and probably pass out. My magic might lash out if I don’t try so hard to contain it like I did today.” Merlin said looking down at the blanket. Arthur nodded.

“Well, I don’t want anyone finding out about you just yet. So I will talk with Leon and we’ll set up a rotation that’ll work with the tournament schedule. It’s two more days, well another day and then the wedding. Do you think you can figure it out in that time?” Arthur asked.

“Maybe? Probably? I don’t really know. I’ll do everything I can.”

“Good. Get some more rest, Merlin. You look like a corpse.” Arthur said and then motioned Gwaine to the other side of the room. Merlin gave his hand a squeeze before letting it go. 

“Can you stay with him tonight? Leon will have someone set up by morning to shadow him through his routine.” 

“Aye. I can do that. Want me to stay here with him, or go to my chambers so he can rest more comfortably? And, before you say anything, yes, I mean rest.” Gwaine said.

“Whichever he prefers. Just have Lance meet me in my chambers with Leon when you get settled wherever you’ll be sleeping. And, Gwaine. He needs sleep.” Arthur said looking almost accusingly at him.

“I agree. Don’t worry about that. If I have to get another sleeping draught from Gaius to force down him, then I will.” Gwaine said solemnly. 

“Alright. I’ll see you tomorrow then. Merlin?” Arthur called.

“Yes, Sire?” came the weak reply.

“Your job tomorrow will simply be to attend me. Your normal chores will be taken over by another servant. If you aren’t with me, you will be with one of the Round Table. Understand?”

“Yeah, I got it. You should get some rest too. Even Kings need their beauty sleep.” He smirked. Arthur rolled his eyes and quietly said to Gwaine, “Good luck.” Then he was gone. 

“Merls, do you want to stay here, or would you want to sleep in my room? I’m staying with you tonight so it’s your call.” Gwaine asked.

“Erm. I suppose it would only be fair to use your room. It has enough space for us to both get some rest.” Merlin said. “But, I know I will not be able to walk that far without help.”

“I think Lance and I can handle that.” Gwaine said.

“Here.” Gaius said, handing Gwaine a couple vials. “This is for the pain, and this is another dose of the sleeping draught. He will need to take them both. See if you can get him to eat before going to sleep. I don’t think he remembered to eat this morning, and I know he didn’t eat lunch.” 

Gwaine took the vials and placed them in his trouser pockets. Then he helped Merlin to a sitting position and caught him as he nearly toppled over from the effort. Lancelot was quickly on the other side of Merlin. Merlin placed one arm on Gwaine’s shoulder and the other on Lancelot’s. As soon as he was on his feet, the room was spinning and he grasped them both tightly and closed his eyes until the spinning stopped. Once he opened his eyes again, he nodded and they moved forward together slowly. Merlin didn’t stumble as much the further they walked, but he was breathing heavily when they finally reached Gwaine’s room. Leon had met them in the hallway, and opened the door so they could lead Merlin to the bed. The Knights lowered him to the bed carefully, propping a few pillows behind him. He was pale and sweating. 

“Thanks.” Merlin said, not opening his eyes.

“Merlin, you need to eat a little before you can go back to sleep.” Lancelot said, placing a bowl of fruit on his lap. Merlin opened his eyes and grinned.

“All my favorites. You must have really been worried.” Merlin said, popping a blackberry in his mouth and looking at his friends.

“Not as worried as the cook or some of the other servants. When I went to get some food and said it was for you, they practically tried throwing enough food for a feast at me. That girl, Diana, handed me a bowl of your favorite berries and hurried me out before anyone else could add anything.” Lancelot told him.

“I’m glad they weren’t able to burden you with food. I don’t need that much.” Merlin said, smiling at the thought.

“Well, get some rest, someone will be by in the morning to accompany you in your tasks.” Leon said, and left with Lancelot. Lancelot took one last look in the room and shared a look with Gwaine, who inclined his head, and then shut the door. Gwaine just stood there and watched Merlin eat. 

“Sit, please. Or lay down, or something.” Merlin pleaded with him. Gwaine turned and gave him his best Gaius eyebrow raise. Merlin pouted, which just caused Gwaine to snort. He took his shirt off, tossing it on the floor, then kicked his boots off. He carefully took the vials out of his pockets and set them on blankets covering Merlin’s legs. Merlin rolled his eyes, but downed both liquids before continuing through his food. Gwaine blew out the candles in the room and went to the bed to lay down next to Merlin. 

“Merls?”

“Yeah?” 

“I, um.” Gwaine cleared his throat, trying to get his thoughts together. “I can’t see you hurt like that again. It...all I could do was watch and hope that you’d be fine.” Merlin reached a hand up and stroked the others cheek.

“I’m sorry to make you worry. I’m still figuring out how my magic...reacts, I guess. It has a mind of its own sometimes and instinctively tries protecting me. I wasn’t in any real danger. I don’t think. My magic was...sort of wrapping me up. If I hadn’t restrained it, and let it seek out the danger instead, things would have been very different. I was afraid I would hurt someone, though.”

“Hmm. Maybe next time, find a way to send one of us a message through our minds instead of just trying to absorb whatever it was, yeah?” Merlin looked down, sheepishly.

“I kind of forgot about that. My magic reacted so strongly, so quickly, that I kind of panicked and just tried keeping it in.” He chuckled. “I will do what I can to remember to reach one or all of you. I promise.” He said, and interlocked their fingers on top of the blankets. Gwaine smiled at the action.

“Merlin?”

“Yeah?”

“About the other morning…” Gwaine started. Heat rose to Merlin’s face immediately, remembering. 

“Yeah?” 

“I didn’t frighten you, did I? It was something that I wanted to do for you. To show you how much I cared. Without going further than I thought you were ready for.” Gwaine told him.

“Frighten me?” Merlin asked, voice cracking. “It was amazing. And wonderful. I don’t know if I’ll be ready for  _ that _ step soon. I want to, gods know I want to. But, not yet. Can you be patient with me?” He asked, a little uncertainly. Gwaine leaned over and kissed him on his cheek.

“Merlin, I will wait forever, if that is what you wanted.” 

“Well, I don’t want to wait that long. But, thanks. Maybe when this week is over we’ll be able to sneak away and spend more time together while the newlyweds are otherwise occupied.”

“Are you asking me on a proper date?” Gwaine asked, smiling wickedly. Merlin huffed.

“Yes, Sir Gwaine. When this week is done, would you want to get a drink with me? Or go on a picnic?” Merlin asked leaning on his shoulder as he slid down in the bed, having eaten all the berries in the dish. Gwaine saw Merlin’s eyelids start to flutter closed.

“I’d love to, Merls. Now get some rest. We’re going to need you at your best the next couple days.” Gwaine kissed his head and then shimmied both of them further down in the bed so they were laying down instead of sitting. Merlin’s head rested on his chest, already breathing deeply. “Goodnight Merls. My love.” Gwaine whispered, stroking a hand through Merlin’s raven hair. 

Morning came and the pair were entangled. A knock sounded at the door, but neither man was awake yet. The door opened and Gwaine was vaguely aware someone had come in. 

“Alright, you two, wakey wakey.” Corbett said as he came in followed by Elyan. 

“Mmmmm.” Gwaine mumbled face buried in a pillow. No, not a pillow, Merlin’s hair. He smiled. “Merls. there’s some mean people here to escort you through your day.” 

“Mmmm.” Merlin groaned. 

“That’s what I said. But if you don’t go soon, Arthur will simply come fetch you himself, you know?”

“I know…” Merlin mumbled and then realized how tangled they were. “I’m stuck. I think we got a little tangled.” Gwaine laughed. This made Merlin laugh.

“Alright, if you two can’t get untangled, we’ll just dump you both on the floor” Elyan told them, smiling wickedly.

“Oi. Just give us a minute!” Merlin shouted. Or tried to shout. He rolled over to his back, but Gwaine’s legs were wrapped in his. “Gwaine, you're not helping you know?” 

“Alright, alright, fine.” Gwaine said and pulled his legs and arms back to himself.

“How did you manage to get that tangled anyway?” Corbett asked.

“Erm. I’m not sure. After I finished eating and took the sleeping draught Gaius gave me, I just sort passed out.” Merlin said climbing out of bed and stretching his hands to the sky. He looked down confused. “Gwaine?”

“Yeah?” 

“What happened to my shirt? I’m pretty sure I had a shirt on when I went to sleep…”

“Hmm? I don’t know. Don’t look at me like that, I fell asleep right after you. You must have taken it off in your sleep.” Gwaine said.

“Well, can I borrow one of yours for today? We didn’t grab any of my extras before coming here last night.” Merlin said, and noticed Elyan had his boots. “So you grabbed my boots, but not an extra shirt?”

“Beggars can’t be choosers, Merlin.” Corbett said, grinning. Merlin rolled his eyes. Gwaine had gotten up and was grabbing a clean shirt from his wardrobe. Merlin’s eyes soaked in the sight of Gwaine’s back and he couldn’t help gazing at his shirtless form with longing. Someone cleared their throat and brought him out of his thoughts. He looked over to see Elyan raising an eye at him. Merlin blushed furiously. When Gwaine turned around he caught the amusement on Elyan and Corbett’s faces and noticed Merlin with a bright red flush creeping over his face. 

“What? What’d I miss?” Gwiane asked, walking over to Merlin to help him put the shirt on. Honestly he just wanted to be close to him again. 

“Oh, nothing much. Just Merlin shamelessly admiring you with your back turned.” Corbett said.

“Merlin is free to look at me however and whenever he pleases.” Gwaine said, pulling the shirt over Merlin’s head and kissing his nose. Merlin of course blushed even more. Gwaine wrapped Merlin’s belt around him, hands moving carefully. He had given him a dark blue tunic that made his eyes seem like endless pools. “I’ll see you later, yeah?” 

“I hope so. I can only handle so many loving and adoring glances between Arthur and Gwen before I feel like I shouldn’t be there.” 

“So kind of like when someone is stuck in the vicinity of you two, then?” Elyan said smugly. Merlin rolled his eyes. 

“Haha. Alright let’s go.” Merlin pulled his boots on and headed for the door, only for Gwaine to catch his hand and pull him in for a kiss, that said everything Gwaine needed to get across. Merlin was shocked and had trouble refocusing to turn and leave. Corbett grabbed him by the shoulders and steered him from the room.

“Come on, loverboy. The King awaits.” He said laughing and tugging the stunned warlock along. 

Merlin still hadn’t gotten his thoughts back in order by the time Corbett was shoving him in the King’s chambers. He simply walked over to the curtains and pulled them back. He then started picking up random things in the room, in a daze. 

“Merlin!” Arthur finally yelled. Merlin jumped and dropped what he had picked up.

“Hmm?” 

“Not the right response.” Arthur said. “What’s going on with you this morning?” Arthur asked, looking at the random assortment of items Merlin had gathered.

“It’s not his fault, Sire.” Elyan pitched in.

“Oh?” Arthur said, waiting for him to continue. 

“I think he’s just figured out that Gwaine loves him,” Corbett said smiling.

“Really?” Arthur asked, stunned. “How’s that?”

“When he was leaving, Gwaine pulled him in for a kiss that probably should have been private. But his meaning was clear. And Merlin has been a bit unresponsive since.” Elyan said, trying to keep his smile from spreading too wide, seeing as Merlin was still in a daze.

“Well, that didn’t take long, then, did it?” Arthur asked, sarcastically. “I wasn’t sure he’d let on this soon.”

“You knew?” Corbett asked.

“Of course I did. I’m not completely unobservant, not as unobservant as Merlin anyway. Do you think he’s broken? Only he hasn’t moved yet.” Arthur said, getting out of bed.

“He’ll be fine. Just give him another few minutes. How long did it take you to come out of it when you realized you loved Gwen?” Elyan asked.

“I...don’t really know. Merlin would. He was there.” Arthur said.

“Do you want us to grab George, then? Or another servant to assist you until he can snap out of it?” Corbett asked. 

“Yeah, I’ll need that, I think. Have someone fetch me breakfast as well. Make it a big one, maybe something to eat will bring him back to his senses.” Arthur said, still looking concernedly at Merlin. “Oh, who will be shadowing him this morning?” 

“I will, Sire. Then Percival will take over, then Lancelot, and Eoin.” Corbett said. “Well, that’s the plan, depending how the tournament goes.”

“Good.” Arthur said and went to try and make sense of his wardrobe. Less than ten minutes later, George had arrived with a very large breakfast and quickly helped the King dress. Arthur dismissed him and hauled Merlin to his feet as he was still kneeling on the floor. Arthur guided him to a chair at the table and sat him down, and then sat himself down. A few minutes later, there was a knock at the door, and Gwen came in. Arthur beamed at her and stood to embrace her. When they kissed, was when Merlin came around, finally.

“Oh my gods!” Merlin shouted and knocked his chair back and nearly tripped over it.

“And he’s back!” Arthur said sarcastically. “Took you long enough.” 

“What?!” Merlin asked, clearly starting to panic. A breeze had wafted through the room. Arthur kissed Gwen’s forehead and went over to his brother and put his hands on his shoulders and forced him to stop pacing and look at him.

“Merlin. Calm down. Deep breaths, yeah?” 

“What do I do? What am I supposed to do? Isn’t this too...too fast? He can’t know now, can he?” Merlin was rambling and felt the panic threatening to overcome him. 

“Merlin, he has been in love with you for a while now. Though he won’t admit how long he’s known. You care for him, yes? And he very much cares for you, yes? So...relax. You will be fine.” Arthur said putting his hands on either side of Merlin’s face and touching their foreheads. He felt Merlin relax, then.

“What have I missed?” Gwen asked, curiously. 

“Oh, nothing much. Apparently Merlin here has just realized that Gwaine loves him.” Arthur said and guided Merlin back to the seat he tipped over, set it up, and sat him down in it. He then placed some food in front of him.

“Oh? I was wondering how long it would take.” Gwen said winking at Merlin. 

“Am I the last one to know?” Merlin asked, voice low.

“Maybe. Does it matter?” Arthur asked. Merlin couldn’t answer. He picked up a grape and ate it, unable to think.

“Merlin. Relax. He knows how you feel about him. Even if you don’t know yet.” Gwen told him and reached across the table to pat his hand. The three sat in companionable silence for a little while then. Merlin reached up and rubbed his temples, feeling a slight headache. Arthur caught this and looked worriedly at him. There was some small dark magic nearby.  _ I’m fine. It’s just...something small. I can’t place it.  _ Merlin thought to Arthur and saw him calm a bit. Only a bit, because having some small dark magic nearby was not something to look forward to. 

When they were done eating the trio rose and began heading out to the tournament grounds. The sword fighting semifinals and finals were today and many of the Knights were participating. When the trio arrived at the dais, the fanfare sounded signaling the arrival of the King. The crowd stood and cheered, Arthur and Gwen waved. Merlin stayed behind the King and noticed that Corbett was always within reach. Corbett had a smug look on his face, and Merlin couldn’t figure out why. He soon found out, though. One of the first Knights out to sword fight, Leon, approached the dais.

“Sire, I wish to add a late entry to the sword fighting.” Leon said. 

“The competition is open to all. If you wish to challenge a specific competitor, you need only issue the challenge.” Arthur announced.

“I, Sir Leon, challenge Merlin.” Everyone went silent. Arthur glanced back at Merlin, who was glaring at a smiling Corbett, who was handing him two short swords. Merlin rolled his eyes, and sighed.

“I accept your challenge.” Merlin said grabbing the swords and walking out to the field. He swung the swords a few times to loosen up, noticing Arthur watching him intently. Arthur hadn’t seen him fight since he started using two blades yet. This should be interesting. Leon smirked at him.

“Are you ready?” he asked.

“Are you?” Merlin replied, dropping into a stance. Leon launched himself at Merlin, not holding back. Merlin was still faster. He moved deftly, swinging each blade as if they were an extension of himself. The fight didn’t last as long as Merlin thought it would. When he was going against only one opponent, he was able to focus solely on him. Less than five minutes and Merlin had Leon disarmed and pinned to the ground, sword pointed at his chest. Merlin was breathing heavily, but reached down to help Leon up. He hadn’t registered the cheering that had erupted, until that moment. Arthur was staring with his mouth hanging open, as was Gwen. The two men made their way off the field so the next duel could begin.

“Why exactly did you do that?” Merlin asked, accepting water from Corbett gratefully. 

“Arthur needed to see how good you’ve gotten.” Leon said simply.

“You sure that’s all?”

“All? No. Most? Yeah, I’d say it’s mostly why.” 

“Hmm.” Merlin said. They walked over to the scorers table and they had already put Merlin’s name up on the board and took Leon’s off. His next fight would be the winner between Percival and another commoner. He felt a hand on his shoulder as he was taking another drink of water.

“It seems your training has paid off. Though I hadn’t intended for you to be able to beat my First Knight.” Arthur’s voice sounded behind him.

“Sorry. When they test me and train me, they usually have at least two people there to come after me at once. It was strange fighting and keeping my focus on just Leon.” Merlin responded.

“I’m not mad, Merlin. Slightly impressed. I look forward to facing you myself.” Arthur patted his arm and then walked back to the dais. 

“Facing me himself? What does that mean?” Merlin asked the others, who just grinned at each other. “What?”

“The winner of the duels fights King Arthur as the finale.” Leon said, waiting for it to sink in. Merlin’s face dropped.

“What?! You all set this up to see me and Arthur fight?” He asked, incredulously.

“Only if you make it that far.” Corbett said, giving him a playful shoulder to shoulder bump.

“You would not have put me in this position if you didn’t think it would end up being me and Arthur.” Merlin said glaring at the Knights. This of course just made them laugh. But their joy caused him to laugh as well. The anger seeping out of him. There was a short and sudden sharp pain in his head. He winced and put a hand to his nose, feeling the blood start dripping. The group quieted and Corbett put an arm on Merlin’s shoulders and guided him to a tent to have him sit down. Getting out of the sun and sitting down, the pain started receding. It was barely a dull ache now. 

“Merlin?” Corbett said, looking at him very concernedly.

“I’m fine. It’s gone, mostly, now.” Merlin told him. Corbett had a cloth and was pouring water on it to wipe up the blood from Merlin’s face. Merlin gave him a small smile. 

“What would happen if it gets too close while you’re fighting? Maybe I shouldn’t have done this.” Leon was pacing.

“Nothing to do about it now, Leon. I should be able to shut it out as long as there is some distance between me and the...source. Just keep an eye out for someone who may seem unfamiliar or who may be paying too much attention to the King and future Queen.” Seeing he hadn’t eased Leon’s anxiety any, he stood and forced him to stop pacing. “Leon, it’s fine. I’m fine. It’s not like yesterday.” Leon nodded, though he could tell he hadn’t entirely convinced the man. It was another hour before Merlin was called out to fight again. He was up against Percival, which hadn’t surprised him. The bigger man had quite the reach, but Merlin was faster. It was a much shorter fight than even Leon’s. Merlin’s smaller stature and quicker feet allowed him to maneuver around and have Percival down in about a minute. The crowd cheered, and Percival looked shocked. Merlin smiled at him and helped him to his feet. The break between his fight with Percival and his next opponent was only about 20 minutes this time. When he got to the field, he was a little surprised to see who he was fighting this time. He smiled.

“Merlin.” 

“Gwaine.”

Without warning the two launched into their fight. They were having fun testing each other, making the fight last longer. The smiles never left their faces. After about 10 minutes, Merlin used the move that Gwaine had taught him and disarmed him and had a sword at his throat. Both were breathing heavily.

“I yield.” Gwaine said, raising his hands in surrender. Merlin lowered his swords and when Gwaine went to pick up his sword, he spotted Ada in the crowd tossing a rose to him. Merlin caught it and went and presented it to the Knight. The crowd all laughed and cheered. Gwaine accepted the flower and reached up and ruffled Merlin’s hair affectionately. The pair walked off the field and headed for the tent Merlin had been in. Once inside, Gwaine didn’t waste any time spinning Merlin to face him and pulling him in for a kiss by his shirt. Merlin smiled. When a cough sounded behind them, the pair separated. 

“That was an interesting fight.” Leon said, grinning.

“I didn’t know you were fighting today.” Gwaine said to Merlin, ignoring Leon’s comment.

“Nor did I. Apparently Leon and some of the others want to see me fight Arthur.” Merlin said, looking at Gwaine’s lips. 

“Hmm. Well you better get some water and get ready. You fight him in just a few more minutes. We were the last fight to get to the King’s match…”Gwaine stopped and reached up touching Merlin’s face just by his nose. Merlin’s nose was bleeding again. “Merlin?” He stumbled a little, putting a hand up on Gwaine’s arm to try and steady himself. His head didn’t ache, but he did feel the area was spinning. Corbett pulled him back to the chair again and began wiping his face with the same rag as earlier. Seeing this, Gwaine paled. “Has this happened already today?” noting the cloth had some traces of blood on it before Corbett started wiping Merlin’s face. 

“Yes. Shortly after his fight with me. I’m going to have a look around and see if I see anyone out of place.” Leon said, and quickly left the tent. 

“I’m f-fine. I’m fine.” Merlin said, though no one was convinced by that. “Can I have some water?” He asked. A cup was in his hands before he could finish asking. He drank and felt the dizziness recede. He closed his eyes and leaned his head back. He reached out with a bit of his magic to see how close the source was. He felt it receding through the town from the tournament field. “It’s gone. Heading back through the town to the gates.” Merlin told them, opening his eyes. 

“Then you better get ready before Arthur marches in here. I think he’s looking forward to testing you.” Gwaine said, somehow keeping his voice even. Merlin smiled a goofy smile at him and got up. Merlin gave Gwaine a quick kiss on his cheek before heading back out. As long as that magic stayed away, he would be fine. He rolled his shoulders back and stepped on the field, to meet a waiting Arthur. 

“Well, Merlin. Let’s see what you got, yeah?” Arthur teased.

“Yes, Sire.” Merlin countered sarcastically. The pair grinned and began to fight. Merlin was good, but Arthur was the best. They were evenly matched, for a while. Merlin’s movements were getting slower. He wasn’t used to fighting this long or this much. Arthur managed to knock one of his swords away, and Merlin knew it wouldn’t be long now. He wasn’t near as good with a single sword as the King. The fight lasted about 15 minutes though. Longer than any of the others, but in the end Merlin was on the ground gasping for air with Arthur’s sword at his chest. Arthur was breathing heavily as well. He laughed then. The crowd cheered like crazy. Arthur helped Merlin to his feet and patted his arms. 

“Good fight, there Merlin. You lasted longer than I would have guessed.” Arthur waited as Merlin gathered his swords and put his arm around the younger man as they walked back to face the dais. The pair gave a bow to Gwen who came forward to kiss Arthur, causing more cheering, and then hugged Merlin tightly. When she backed away from him, her smile was replaced with a frown. 

“Merlin? Are you alright?” She asked. His nose had started bleeding. Arthur, seeing this, called for Corbett to get him inside. Merlin nodded to Arthur and then went with the Knight. Corbett took him to the tent, where Merlin would have collapsed to the ground if someone hadn’t caught him. There were hands putting him on the cot in the tent. Before anyone could do anything, he’d started to shake violently. Corbett and Gwaine were trying to hold him down so he didn’t hurt himself. The shaking stopped after a minute or two, thankfully. Before anyone could react, Merlin leaned over the cot and vomited on the ground. It was black. He coughed a few times, and then lay still. A sheen of sweat covered his face and he had paled. 

“What the hell is wrong with him?!” Arthur shouted and ran in the tent to Merlin’s side. He’d seen him puke up the black stuff. “Get Gaius! Now!” Arthur directed. He didn’t care who went. He looked up and saw Gwaine on his knees on the other side of the cot. “Gwaine. He’ll be fine. We need to get him to the castle. Can you help me get him inside?” Gwaine wiped his face and nodded. The cot was a patient cot, a litter, so each man grabbed an end after securing Merlin to it, and headed inside. They met Gaius at the steps. 

“Where should we take him?” Gwaine asked, trying to hide his worry.

“My chambers. I will need to keep him close to monitor him. Hurry! He doesn’t look like he is breathing.” Gaius said, voice heavy with emotion. The men looked down and realized Merlin wasn't breathing. They ran past Gaius to the physician’s chambers, set the litter down on top of the patient cot, and watched, hoping to see the still form breathe. Gaius comes in and shoves them out of the way. He tilts Merlin’s head back and directs Gwaine to breathe for him. Arthur is told to place his hands on Merlin’s chest above his heart and push down several times. After a few more breaths from Gwaine, a loud gasp comes from Merlin, and he begins coughing leaning over the side of his cot before falling back down. Gaius then rushes Arthur and Gwaine out of the room so he can examine his patient. 

Gwaine stood frozen staring at the closed door. Arthur pulled Gwaine by the arm down the corridor to the Knights hall. When he entered, he found the Knights of the Round Table. He guided Gwaine to a chair and sat him down. 

“Keep an eye on him. I want two guards posted on the physician’s chambers at all times. I am to be notified immediately when he wakes up. I don’t care what time it is. Understood?” 

“Yes, Sire.” Came the chorus of voices. He rested a reassuring hand on Gwaine’s shoulder. The other man finally looked up at him. He didn’t say anything, Arthur just squeezed his shoulder and left to find Gwen. 

When he got to his chambers he began attempting to get out of his armor and chainmail. He was frustrated and worried and couldn’t reach the clasps. He threw his gauntlets and gloves across the room and shoved everything from his desk to the floor. 

“Arthur. Let me help you out of that.” Gwen says softly coming up to him. Her hands moved quickly, and soon he was free from the armor and chainmail, though the weight he felt on his shoulders was not eased. “Talk to me.” She said.

“I can’t...I can’t lose him.” Arthur said, barely in control of his emotions. He sat down in the chair behind his desk.

“You won’t. He’s strong. He has all of you. All of us. Does Gaius know what is making him ill?” She asked, rubbing his shoulders.

“He has some ideas. He isn’t allowing anyone to see him right now. He needs to be ok.” Arthur said, putting his hand on hers.

“Have faith. He’ll be driving you mad in no time with his made up words.” She said and leaned down and kissed his cheek. Arthur nodded. 

“Thank you, Guinevere. I’m sorry I left so suddenly after the bout. I should have made sure you were ok.” He hooked his arm around her waist and looked up at her face. Her presence always made him feel at ease. “You’re so good to me.”

“I love you.” She said caressing his face. She leaned in and kissed him, making sure the love came across the kiss. She touched his forehead with hers. “I should go. I’ll see you tomorrow. Get some rest.” She extricated herself from his grip and left the room. 

As she left, she wandered her way through the castle. She had planned to go home, but she found herself walking the corridors, like she was looking for someone. It was an odd feeling. For some reason, Theo was the one on her mind. She had loved him once. But she loved Arthur now. Why would she be thinking of Theo. Between fights today the pair had met up behind the tents. She found herself drawn to him. Her thoughts felt muddled. She hoped that the walk right now would clear her mind. The sun had just gone down and she found herself in the small audience chamber that her and Arthur had met their guests the previous days. When she had seen Theo for the first time in years. Had it been seven years already? He had been her first kiss. At one time, they had hoped he would take over the forge from her father and they could wed. They were still children then, but it was a nice dream. She started at a noise that sounded like shuffling feet behind her. When she turned around, Theo was there. She rushed over to him and they embraced. 

“What are you doing here?” She asked.

“I had to see you. I could not stay away.” He told her and moved a stray curl from her face. He then caressed her cheek, dragging his thumb down to her chin, tilting it up to look him in the eyes. 

“I’ve been thinking of you these past days. You’ve been constantly in my thoughts. Why? Why now?” She asked, genuinely confused. 

“I can’t answer that. Thinking of you these past years, seeing your face again, is what has kept me going. I’m only sorry that I arrived too late. You’re marrying the King tomorrow. I’ve lost my chance.” He said leaning forward and breathing her scent in. “You smell like lavender.”

“Theo. You...you should leave. You should not be here. If the King were to see you here, with me. He would not spare your life.” Gwen said, but found she could not move away from him. 

“If you wish, I will go.” He said cupping her face. 

“I wish…” She started. Before she could finish her thought he had pressed his lips to hers. This was wrong. She felt the wrongness of it, but she could not stop herself. Her arms wrapped around his neck pulling him in, running her hands through his hair. Suddenly, Theo was ripped away from her and thrown to the ground. Arthur was standing over him with a murderous look in his eyes. Theo was back on his feet in a few seconds. 

“No! Arthur no, don’t!” Gwen was crying and shouting. Aggravaine was standing behind her, holding her in place. 

“Guards!” Arthur yelled. When they entered the room seeing their King with his sword drawn and aimed at the other man. “Take them to the cells. Both of them.” The guards grabbed Theo and dragged him roughly through the castle while Aggravaine did the same to Gwen. 

The pair were thrown in cells at opposite ends of the dungeons. Gwen fell to the floor crying, unable to stop. What had gotten in to her? Why would she ever betray Arthur like that? She grabbed the bracelet from her hand and threw it across the stone floor. When she had done that, she felt her head clear. Arthur had already been distressed because of Merlin, and now she had betrayed him. She didn’t sleep. Arthur had come down during the night to speak to them. He came to her first. She stayed on her knees in the center of the cell, waiting for him to speak as her tears continued to race down her face.

“Have you nothing to say?” He asked through clenched teeth. 

“There is nothing I can say.” She said voice hoarse.

“One day Guinivere. That’s all. We were to be married in ONE DAY!” He shouted. 

“I know.” She said, voice breaking. “I know. I love you Arthur.”

“You love me?” He scoffed. “You love me but you couldn’t wait one more day? I loved you Guinivere. I trusted you. So forgive me for not understanding!” She could see how much pain she caused reflecting in his eyes as he yelled.

“I’m s-s...I’m sorry.” She said looking to the ground.

“Sorry. I’m sorry as well. Do you know what people are saying? That in my fathers day, you would be hanged.” He said, pausing. “I don’t want to see you die, Guinevere. But I don’t want to see you. You have until sunset tomorrow to leave Camelot. You are henceforth banished from Camelot. Returning is on pain of death.” Arthur said, voice cracking at the end, heavy with his pain, and left her.

“No! Arthur please!” She cried. She knew it was no use. He was gone. The love in his eyes when he looked at her had been replaced with sadness and anger. She had done that to him. When morning came she was released from her cell and escorted to her home, where a guard was placed while she packed up her belongings. 

*******

Arthur was crushed. His heart was smashed and broken. He was broken. He still could not believe what he had seen in the small audience chamber. His Uncle had come to him after sunset stating that some guards had seen someone suspicious in the castle. They snuck in through the servants entrance of the chamber but, he had not been prepared for what he had seen. It was that man, Theo. And Gwen was there too. They were speaking softly. When they embraced, Arthur’s breath went out. How could she betray him? He saw red and ran in the room throwing the man to the floor away from Gwen. He raised his sword to the man, who stood and looked at him defiantly. The guards and his Uncle drug the pair away, leaving him alone. He went to his room, hoping to think but his Uncle came in to speak with him. To see what his intent was. Aggravaine, while usually giving sound advice, insisted on the execution of both parties. Arthur had finally shouted at his Uncle and sent him away. He went down to the cells to speak with each one. He went to Gwen first. It was the hardest thing he had to do as King, so far. To banish the woman that he loved and planned to make his Queen. He walked away from her while she pleaded with him. He wiped away a few tears that had escaped. If he listened to his love, no, former love, he knew he would break further. When he got to the other end of the hall, the man, Theo, lay unmoving in the cell. There was a vial on the ground next to him. So, the man was a coward. Arthur directed the guards to get rid of the body. He went and stood on the battlements. He needed air. Fresh air, and Merlin. But his friend was not well. Arthur stood there and let the tears fall. He let his pain and anguish out. He felt like he’d been made a fool. 

As the sun rose, he watched while Gwen was escorted to her home. Arthur decided to go sit with his friend. Maybe just being near him would ease his heartache a little. He knocked at the physicians door after acknowledging the guards he had placed there, and waited for a response. When he got none, he opened the door and went in. Gaius was sleeping. He looked like he had been up most of the night. Arthur decided not to wake him and pulled a chair next to the patient cot that Merlin was laying on. Arthur noticed a black liquid dripping out of Merlin’s nose. He grabbed a cloth, dipped it in some water, and then reached over to wipe it off. As he did, Merlin groaned a little and turned his head. Arthur then noticed some liquid had also dripped from his ear. Arthur quickly wiped it away as well, as gently as he could. When he was dipping the cloth in a bowl of water again he noticed that the water now was turning black.

“Arthur?” came a strained and unused voice. 

“Merlin! Don’t speak yet, here drink some water first.” Arthur said and handed over a cup.

“Thanks.” Merlin said after having a few sips.

“How are you feeling?” Arthur asked.

“Mmm. Like someone took a very large hammer to my brain. And then it was stung repeatedly by a hundred bees. Again. Or something like that anyway.”

“Well, you look terrible, honestly. I don’t want you back at work for at least a week. That means no training, no chores, no nothing.” Merlin chuckled at the King.

“Yes, Sire.” Merlin said.

“I’m serious. You...you scared all of us. You had stopped breathing, Merlin. And you were vomiting up something black.”

“Hmm. That explains why my throat feels like it's burning then.” He said. 

“Yeah that would probably be why.” Arthur relaxes a little at the sarcasm.

“Arthur?”

“Yes, Merlin?”

“What’s happened?” Damn. Of course Merlin picked up on his mood.

“Nothing I want to worry you with right now. We will talk, but I need a few days first. And you need to rest. You need to have Gaius give you a once over again. When I came in you had some black fluid coming out of your nose and ears.” Arthur told him, looking in his eyes. “You’re not allowed to die on me, you hear?” 

“I know, Arthur. I uh, I think that the dark magic is gone. I felt it when it...dissolved, I guess is the right word. I don’t know what it was, or who it was, but it’s gone now. I’m sorry for worrying you.” Merlin says, giving him a small smile. 

“Go back to sleep if you can. If you walk around looking as pale as you are now, you’re going to scare everyone into thinking a ghost is loose in the castle.” Merlin smirked at the thought. Arthur watched as he fell back to sleep. Gaius had woken up while the pair were talking and waited until Merlin was asleep again before moving to get up. 

“Sire. Thank you for being here when he woke up. I know that if you hadn’t been, he would have attempted to get himself down the hall to you. You’re a good friend to him.” Gaius said standing and coming over to check on his ward.

“What do you think this was?” Arthur asked, and showed Gaius the bowl with black water and cloth with a black substance on it. 

“I’m not sure. Could be remnants of the dark magic that has been plaguing him all week. I can try to find something on it, but I fear there will be no real answer. Merlin is...not a typical creature of magic. So I fear we may not know the damage done to him. I do know that he will heal. He is strong, as is his magic. You know that he will probably try coming to see you before the week is over though.” 

“I know. That is why there will be guards posted outside the door through the days and nights until the week is up. If you tell me that he needs longer, the guards will remain longer. They will have instructions not to let him leave. I’ll have George bring some food, or whatever you may need. The Knights are allowed to visit, BUT, they cannot stay more than an hour or two. This includes Gwaine. I will speak with him, but I don’t want him to derail Merlin’s healing.” Arthur paused and thought for a moment. “Do you think the Druids might be able to help him?”

“I suppose, they might be able to do so. Why?” Gaius asked.

“Do you think he’d be stable or well enough to travel to them? The magical law changes are getting sent out this week, but I don’t want to have them come here if they are not comfortable with it. I’m not my father, but his reign did take its toll on the citizens.”

“Sire, if I may? The end of the week would be his best bet for being well enough to travel. I can send word to the Druids and they can meet him outside of the citadel walls.”

“Thank you, Gaius. I know they will take care of him.” Arthur paused and then met the old man’s eyes. “They will take care of their King.” Gaius only sighed.

“Yes. They will.” Gaius said. Arthur nodded. 

“ If anything happens, send one of the guards to find me.” Arthur stood up, and, after a last glance at his sleeping friend, he headed back to his room. This past day, had by far, been one of the worst days of his life. He felt hollow. When Arthur got to his chambers he stripped off his boots and clothes and climbed in bed where he intended to spend the rest of the day.


	19. The Druid King

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Merlin goes to heal with the Druids. Gwaine realizes how much he loves Merlin and hopes he isn't too late in showing it. The Druids perform a ceremony before Merlin leaves them.

The week Merlin spent in the room was extremely dull. The Knights all came by and visited with him, but after an hour, sometimes two, Gaius would chase them off. Geoffrey had visited, or sent Eoin, to collect the books that Merlin had borrowed and also, to his delight, brought him a few more. He was enjoying the Greek epics still along with diving into Egyptian and more Roman tales. Arthur hadn’t visited him since he woke up the first time. Neither had Gwaine, or even Gwen. He found he missed talking with his friend. Merlin wanted to talk to her about Gwaine, but she never came by. At the end of that week, Lancelot came by, but not for a friendly visit.

“Gaius. The arrangements have been made. Will he be ready to leave this afternoon?” Lancelot asked, trying to keep his voice down.

“Yes, he should be fine. As long as the journey isn’t more than a few hours.” Gaius told him.

“It should only be about three hours. We just got word this morning that they are expecting him. I’ll come by and collect him after midday.” Lancelot said and then turned to leave. Merlin had his nose in a book and had missed the entire exchange. Gaius went into Merlin's room and packed a small bag to send with him. He would miss his boy, but he needed to heal. His coloring was still very pale and the dark circles under his eyes were getting worse. He had been having nightmares that refused to let him sleep more than two hours at a time, sleeping draught or not. When midday came, he had Merlin take a painkiller and eat a sandwich. As soon as he finished, Lancelot was back. He nodded at Gaius and grabbed the pack that had been prepared. Merlin was still in his book and hadn’t noticed Lancelot come in, until the Knight grabbed the book from Merlin’s hands and put it on the table.

“Hey!” Merlin exclaimed. “I was reading that!”

“Sorry, Merlin. You need to get up. It’s time to stop lazing about. You and I have somewhere to go.” Lancelot told him. He had already started to ease Merlin up from the bed.

“Go? I was told I wasn’t allowed to go anywhere or do anything yet. Where am I meant to be going?” Merlin asked, trying to hide how much his body shook when he stood.

“You’ll see. Now come on.” As Lancelot said this, Gaius came over and gave Merlin a hug and hurried them out the door. The Guards outside the door took over assisting Merlin outside the castle. When he finally got there, he was out of breath, sweat was glistening on his face. The Guards helped get him on his horse and then returned to the castle.

“Lance?”

“Yes, Merlin?”

“What’s going on? Why am I on a horse? Where are we going?”

“You’ll see Merlin. It’s going to be a few hours, so let me know if you need to stop at all. I’d like to get there sooner rather than later, though.”

“Lance?”

“Yes, Merlin?” he responded while sending his horse forward and Merlin prompted his forward as well.

“Um. I, uh, I haven’t seen Gwaine, or Arthur, all week. Are they avoiding me? Did I do something wrong?” Merlin asked, trying his hardest to reign in his emotions.

“No, Merlin, you did nothing wrong. Seeing you as they did, it took a toll. Gwaine went on a patrol yesterday and won’t be back for a few more days, same with Elyan. Arthur...has been very busy.” Lancelot said.

“He...he couldn’t bring himself to see me, could he?”

“No, I don’t think he could. It’s not easy to see the one you love at the mercy of an illness that is magical in nature.”

“Does he-” Merlin had to clear his throat, “does he still love me? Or have I scared him away?” He said quietly, wiping the tears from his face that had escaped.

“Merlin. Don’t be ridiculous. He has cared about you for a long time if he’s being honest. Having you reciprocate those feelings, I’ve never seen him happier in the time I’ve known him. When he gets back, he should be better. Just...trust me, Merls. He can’t not love you.”

“Thanks Lance.” Merlin smiled at him, though it was full of sadness.

They rode on in silence, Merlin had started looking worse the longer they went. When they finally stopped, Lance tied his horse up and then came to help Merlin down. The younger man nearly collapsed when his feet touched the ground. Merlin snapped his head up and looked to the right. Lancelot followed his gaze and saw several Druids standing there. They bowed to Merlin, and then came forward to help Lancelot guide him into their camp. Before they had made it more than a half dozen steps, Merlin collapsed. Lancelot and another Druid had caught him and quickly moved him forward to a tent and lay him down on a small bed inside.

“Please, can you help him?” Lancelot asked looking up at the man, the Druid, who had helped him.

“He is very sick. The dark magic that affected him is still in his system. We should be able to help him, but it will take time. He will need to be asleep for most of it. Please, let’s walk for a moment, while he is tended to by our other healers.” The man said, directing Lancelot out of the small tent.

“Why did he collapse when we arrived? Do you know?” Lancelot couldn’t help the questions.

“He was simply overwhelmed. Many of our kind speak through our minds. We can direct who it is we want to talk to. Unfortunately, no matter who the thoughts are directed to,Emrys hears them all. He cannot shut them out without great effort. In his current state, it was more than he could handle. His magic is very strong, which is why he is still alive.” The man said, looking Lancelot in the eyes, ensuring his statement sunk in.

“You mean to say he should be dead?”

“If he were any other magic user, he would not have felt the dark magic that surrounded him. Or he might have, but he wouldn’t have absorbed any of it.”

“Do you know how powerful he is?”

“I do not. But when he wakes, we will help him to...explore some of it. He is special.” The man says, looking away towards where the healers were working on him.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t catch your name. I’m Lancelot.”

“You may call me Merrik. Are you planning to stay with us? It will be at least a few days before he wakes, but you are welcome to sit with him. He should be wholly healed in around two weeks.”

“How do you know that?” Lancelot asks, clearly confused.

“Our healers told me.” Merrik says and points to his temple.

“Ah. Of course. Well, I don’t want to leave him. But I won’t be any use just hanging around. I’ll try to visit in a few days once he’s awake again. Would you be able to send word to Camelot when he is well and ready to return?”

“Yes. Should we send word to you, or the King? Or… who is Gwaine?”

“He is Merlin’s love. You should probably just send word to me or King Arthur. Gwaine has been upset after seeing how ill Merlin was. He watched him die, in essence. He is having some trouble with it.” Lancelot said looking back to where Merlin lay unconscious.

“I understand. When he is ready, I will let him know to send word to you or the King. Can you thank him? The King? His new proclamations on magic are being rejoiced by many.”

“I will pass it on. I think it would be best for me to return to Camelot without delay. I feel if I stay, even for an hour, I will not want to leave him.”

“Thank you, Lancelot. For protecting him. Please tell Gwaine that he is in Merlin’s thoughts. He has no need to fear for the young warlock. He will need his strength in the days to come.” Lancelot nodded to the man, then left the camp and headed back to Camelot.

When he rode back, he also brought Merlin’s horse back. If he was going to be gone for a few weeks, then he wanted to make certain he wasn’t tempted to leave his respite early. It was already dusk when he returned. He walked up to his room to drop off his things and throw on a clean shirt before going to the Knights hall. Percival, Eoin, Leon, and Corbett were all there having a few drinks. 

“Lance!” Percival exclaimed, as his friend came in.

“Perce!” He responded, garnering laughter from the others.

“Where’ve you been?” Percival asked.

“Ah. Well, I, uh,” he took a deep breath and ran his hand through his hair, “I took Merlin to the Druids.”

“What?!” the whole room exploded. Lancelot held up his hands to forestall any further questions.

“He wasn’t getting any better. And the King decided it might be better for him to heal. Besides, he was miserable sitting in that room.”

“You mean because Gwaine hasn’t been to see him?” Corbett asked.

“Partially. I know Gwaine is dealing with a lot, having watched him die, and all, but he hadn’t gone to see him. Merlin thinks that maybe he doesn’t care for him that much after all. He was heartbroken. Anyway, the Druids said it will take at least two weeks before he would be well enough to return. They said he’d be asleep for the next few days.” Lancelot told them, and found he was biting at his thumb.

“Have you told Arthur that he’s gone yet?” Percival asked quietly.

“No, not yet. I’ll tell him tomorrow.” Lance said, sitting down next to Percival. “We need to have a word with Gwaine when he returns.”

“Agreed.” Corbett nearly growled.

“What’s going on Lance?” Eoin asked.

“The man I spoke with, the Druid, Merrik, said that Merlin would need Gwaine’s strength in the days to come. It sounded...ominous. Not at all reassuring.” The others all nodded at the statement.

“Gwaine should be back tomorrow afternoon. We’ll talk to him then.” Corbett said, though the way he said  _ talk to _ sounded more like  _ corner _ .

“Maybe...maybe we should  _ not _ tell Gwaine that Merlin is gone.” Eoin said cautiously, eyeing Corbett.

“What do you mean?” Corbett asked, clearly confused.

“If we don’t bring up that he’s gone, and don’t bring up his condition, it will force him to eventually check on it himself. We simply...wait. See how long it takes him to figure it out.” Eoin clarified.

“So, you want to just wait? Just see if he figures out that Merlin is gone on his own?” Lancelot asked.

“Yes.” Eoin said.

“Hmm.” was Lancelot’s response. “So we offer nothing. Let him work it out on his own. Do you think you can leave him be?” he directed at Corbett. Corbett was clearly struggling.

“Why don’t you head out on a patrol tomorrow before he gets back so you don’t try to pummel him, yeah?” Leon added.

“That’s probably a good idea. I’d like to think I could be civil, but, I also know that that could change when I see him. It...bothers me that anyone could, would, knowingly distress Merlin.” Corbett grumbled.

“Does Merlin know what happened after he fell ill?” Leon asked.

“No.” Lancelot said looking down at his hands. Corbett stood to leave.

“I’m going to bed. If possible, I’d like to be in the group that goes to get Merlin when it’s time for him to come back.”

“Of course, Corbett. I know he would enjoy seeing you.” Lancelot said. He sighed when Corbett left the room. “I’m going to bed also. I do not look forward to telling Arthur how long Merlin will be gone.”

The first week Merlin was gone away from Camelot, seemed to blur together for Arthur. He had done what he could to shut off his emotions. They would only cause him trouble. He was heartbroken after Gwen’s betrayal. After he announced to the Knights what had transpired, he refused to have her name said in his presence. Arthur had distanced himself from everyone. Even more than when his father had died. He became hyper-focused on ensuring the safety and prosperity of his kingdom. Magic was no longer punishable by death throughout Camelot. And he couldn’t even share that and enjoy it with the person he had done it for. When Lancelot had told him that Merlin had been delivered to the Druids and that they sent back their gratitude for his work to end their persecution, he had mixed feelings. The Druids had known it was happening, he wasn’t exactly surprised. But he had wanted to share it with his friend. His brother. Aggravaine had been advocating against the change in the laws. Arthur could not figure out why. He decided that in the next few days he wanted to go hunting, get away from the citadel for a little while. A few days hunting always made him feel better. Or at the least, served as a nice distraction. Already his Uncle was trying to convince him that he should be seeking to forge an alliance through marriage to one of the surrounding kingdoms. Arthur did not enjoy making these decisions. He liked it even less when Merlin wasn’t there to discuss it with, or reassure him that he was making a wise choice. Or call him some silly name that he made up. When had he become so reliant on Merlin’s voice in his duties?

Arthur decided to take a walk and see where he ended up. He found himself in the Knights hall doorway, for a brief second, before the door flew open. Many of the Round Table Knights were in and having a drink to polish off the day. Some had just come back from patrol, like Corbett and Leon. Arthur noticed that Corbett was sitting against the wall and glaring at Gwaine, who seemed oblivious and was telling some story fairly animatedly. They all stopped when they noticed him standing in the doorway.

“Arthur! It’s good to see you. Care to join us?” Lancelot said.

“If it’s not too much trouble. I could use some...cheering up, or a distraction at least. Thought I’d come see how everyone was doing and such.” Arthur said, walking in and taking a seat by the table.

“You know you’re always welcome, Sire.” Leon said, setting a drink in front of him.

“So, what’s Gwaine on about this time?” He asked quietly so as to not start him over on his tale. Corbett scoffed and turned away, trying to make it seem he coughed.

“Nothing in particular. Same old stories about taverns he was chased out of.” Lancelot said, trying to cover up Corbett’s behavior.

“Mm. So what has you upset, then, Corbett?” Arthur asked, turning to face the younger man.

“Nothing to worry you with, Sire. It’s more of a...personal matter, really.” Corbett told him.

“So it has nothing to do with a particular absent raven haired imbecile then?” Arthur asked him, getting straight to the point. Corbett shifted in his seat.

“Only slightly, Sire. But, don’t worry about it. As I said, it’s nothing to worry you about. I’ll get it sorted.” Corbett responded. Arthur decided to let it drop and turned back to those gathered at the table.

“I want to plan a hunting party in a few days. I need to get out of the castle.” He says taking a drink.

“That sounds like a great idea.” Gwaine says coming to sit by the King. “How long would we be gone for?”

“Two or three days should be enough time. We’ll leave the day after tomorrow. I have too many meetings to attend tomorrow to skip out on.”

“Sounds perfect, Sire. How large of a group would be going?” Lancelot asks.

“Let's try to keep it to around eight or so. Whoever wants to come is welcome, though. We will need to make sure we have someone along who can cook what we kill though, since our usual is out of commission.” Arthur said and glanced over at Corbett.

“I can take care of that, Sire, no problem. I’ll swing by the kitchens and see Gaius to get some herbs and medicines, just in case.” Corbett added.

“Great. Well, I won’t interfere in whatever you all were doing before I got here. Whoever is going will need to be in front of the castle just after breakfast the day after tomorrow. Have a good night.” Arthur said and headed back to his room, starting to feel just a tiny bit better.

After Arthur had left, Gwaine had tried to talk to Corbett, but the other man had fled almost as quickly as the King. He turned to Lancelot, who had also watched Corbett leave.

“Have I don’t something or wronged him in some way?” Gwaine asked.

“In a sense, yes, and no.” Lancelot said watching for a reaction.

“Care to elaborate or are you going to stick with ominous and unhelpful?” Gwaine retorted. Percival snorted and chuckled at this response.

“You haven’t wronged him, personally. But he feels you have wronged someone he cares about. Is that a better answer?” Lancelot said.

“Hmm. Who is it that I have wronged, then?” Gwaine asks.

“Can you think of no one?” Percival asked. Gwaine scratched his beard and thought. He hadn’t wronged anyone that he could think of but…

“I don’t think I’ve wronged anyone, but I suppose he’s probably mad I haven’t been to see Merlin yet, yeah?” He asked and took a drink. Just thinking of him brought flashes, images of pale skin, blood dripping down his face, uncontrollable shaking, and then stillness. Gwaine kept having nightmares that Merlin was dead and he couldn’t bring himself to try and visit him yet. Gwaine looked at the others and saw that he was correct. “Look, I know I should’ve gone to see him by now, but I can’t yet. I keep seeing him laying there, blood dripping down his face, laying still. Dead.” Gwaine said and shuddered at the memories.

“We understand. But Corbett cares for Merlin like he is his brother. If you want to make things right, you should talk to him.” Lancelot said and then shot a glare at Leon who looked like he was going to say something else.

“What? What is it you aren’t telling me?” Gwaine asked, looking between them.

“It doesn’t matter. Not unless you want to tell us you intend to visit Merlin?” Leon says, questioningly. Gwaine chewed his lip.

“I know I should. He probably thinks I hate him now, or at the least, that I don’t want to see him anymore. Which, by the way, couldn’t be further from the truth. But I want to give him time to rest and heal. When he’s better, I’ll see him. But he needs to focus on getting well. And maybe reading Greek stories is what will help him.” Gwaine said looking at the remaining drink in his cup. He tossed it back, nodded to the others, and then headed off to his room, but something caused him to stop and listen at the door.

“He is going to find out.” Leon said.

“Probably. But not yet. You heard what he said. He wants to give him time to rest and get well. That is what he is doing. We will just need to keep an eye on him for when he thinks he’s finally ready to see him. But no one will tell him anything until that time.” Lancelot said looking at each of the Knights in the room. It was no secret to those in and around the castle that Gwaine and Merlin were in a relationship. Gwaine walked down the corridor to his room, wondering what it was they meant.

The day of the hunt came, and all the Round Table were waiting on the steps as Arthur came down trailed by the manservant George. Lancelot laughed and quickly turned away trying to hide his expression from the King. Arthur just rolled his eyes. He really didn’t like George’s efficiency and complete tact and decorum. It was annoying. Arthur enjoyed how Merlin treated him like a regular person and not the royal he had been raised. When they took off, Lancelot rode next to Arthur, followed by Percival and Elyan, then Gwaine and Eoin, and Corbett and Leon were in the rear. They rode until midday and stopped and set up their camp. Corbett offered to remain at the campsite while everyone else went on the move to seek out prey. The day was quiet, which was unusual. Everyone was used to Merlin tripping or crashing through the trees right when Arthur was going to fire a shot. A few times, Arthur had hesitated and glanced behind him, as if expecting any second that the clumsy boy would appear. Arthur called for a halt and they headed back to their campsite about an hour before sunset. When they got back, everyone was noticeably subdued. Corbett collected the game and started a meal.

“It was interesting being on a hunt without the game being scared off.” Leon said quietly.

“I kept expecting him to come bumbling through the trees at the last second.” Arthur added.

“Do you remember the time when he tripped and dropped a crossbow and somehow managed to get a deer?” Percival said through his laughter.

“That’s right! I almost forgot about that!” Lancelot had started laughing too.

“Oh! What about the time that he fell down that hill and landed on top of a boar?” Elyan added, as he doubled over in laughter.

“Do you remember his face? I don’t know who was more surprised, him or the boar!” Leon said. The whole group had burst into laughter remembering that day. Corbett was grinning at least, though not laughing fully like the others. He dished out the food and handed it out to the others. It was hard to miss his coldness toward Gwaine, but he did attempt to hide it. Lancelot gave him a reassuring smile. The meal went by in relative silence, each in their own thoughts. When the meal was over, Corbett gathered the dishes and pots and took them to wash at a stream nearby.

“Any reason why you’re being so cold to Gwaine?” Asked a voice behind him.

“I’m not trying to, Sire. I know that this whole thing has been hard for him, but I can’t help but feel he is being selfish.” Corbett answered, seeing it was Arthur behind him.

“It is not easy seeing the one you love in danger. And I can tell you that I still wake in the night from dreams where I see him lying there unmoving. And I don’t love him. Not the way Gwaine does. I’ve seen these types of tragedies happen and it will either bring them closer, or it’ll push them apart. I don’t think that Gwaine wants to part from Merlin. But I also don’t think he is ready to see him yet. I know you are all keeping him in the dark about Merlin’s condition, and I appreciate that. You should talk to him.” Arthur said this while helping clean some of the dishes. They walked back to the camp together and the group was now listening to Lancelot tell what happened in more detail when he and Merlin deceived Arthur to empty the cup of life to defeat the immortal army.

“I have no idea how he survived, let alone as able to walk again. I heard the cracking, clear as day as Morgause threw him against the wall. If Gaius hadn’t gotten there when he did, I know she would have tried to finish him off.” Lancelot shivered. “The sound of his bones cracking back in to place was almost worse than the sound of it breaking. I wish I had a fraction of the pain tolerance he has.”

“I still need to make him sit down with me and tell me some of the times he’s saved Camelot.” Arthur said sitting down amidst the group.

“I’m still trying to figure out his thing with Greek lately.” Eoin said.

“Greek?” Leon asked.

“Yeah, he’s been reading every Greek epic he could get his hands on. I had taken to bringing the books to Geoffrey and getting him a new one every now and then.” Eoin elaborated.

“He was reading one of those the last time I saw him.” Lancelot said. “I wonder what it was about?”

“Probably something romantic, knowing him.” Percival threw in, chuckling a little.

“Probably.” Corbett laughed a little.

“It was either that or something about customs and traditions. He’s been stuck on apples lately. Have you noticed?” Lancelot asked. Eoin started laughing.

“What about apples? He seemed startled when I tossed him an apple the day he was doing training with everyone.” Gwaine asked, scratching his head. Eoin just fell over continuing to laugh. The laughter was infectious and soon the others were laughing and smiling at the Knight.

“What is it?” Arthur asked, hoping he could get an answer.

“Well, after catching him reading so often, I had him tell me some of the traditions and stories he was reading.” Eoin paused catching his breath. “In Greek times presenting someone with an apple was the same as proposing to them. He had just read about that before coming down to the training field that day, which is why he looked so surprised.” This caused everyone to bust out laughing harder, but Gwaine paled.

“I don’t think he took it that way, so relax.” Eoin said, waving his hands to get Gwaine’s attention. “He isn’t Greek and doesn’t practice their traditions or anything. He just likes learning about other...cultures and such.”

“Before anyone says anything else, it doesn’t count, and you know what I’m referring to.” Lancelot said, wiping tears from his face. That seemed to bring Gwaine back to reality.

“Doesn’t count for what?” Gwaine asked, rolling his shoulders back trying to brush off his momentary embarrassment.

“Don’t worry about it Gwaine. You know how it is with wagers. If they're about you, you can’t know what it’s about.” Percival winked at him and gave his shoulder a playful shove. Gwaine rolled his eyes.

“Alright, fair enough. Did you know that he talks in his sleep sometimes? I have no idea what language it is, though. He keeps switching. I recognize a little latin now and again but the rest is…” Gwaine shrugs. This statement earns him a few snickers from the group.

“He used to end up cleaning and doing spells in his sleep. I remember waking up to floors scrubbing themselves or armor cleaning itself.” Lancelot gave a small laugh.

“Hang on! When would this have happened?” Gwaine asked, shocked.

“Lancelot? Don’t tell me you had a thing with Merlin at some point too..” Arthur groaned.

“No, nothing like that!” Lancelot quickly held his hands up in defense. “I stayed with him a while after the immortal Army, before I had my own chambers as a Knight. Since I was the only one at that time who knew of his magic, he liked being able to be himself openly and talk freely. He wasn’t afraid. So I stayed with him for, what, a month or so? Something like that. I would hear something in the night and wake up to hear him muttering some spell or another and see his eyes flutter open a little gold peaking out, and then the broom would work its way across the floor, or the armor he brought back to clean would start polishing itself.”

“Hmm.” Gwaine wasn’t convinced, and was scowling.

“Don’t get me wrong, he’s really wonderful when he looks free and unburdened. But, even then, someone else had caught his eye.” Lancelot said and nudged Gwaine.

“What? That was almost a year ago. Are you telling me what I think you're telling me?” Gwaine asked, a little flabbergasted.

“Yes,  _ Sir _ Gwaine. He had his eye on you even then. Though he’d probably never admit it. After his last love died, he was...afraid of having feelings like that again. He’d told me as much, though he never told me much about her.” Lancelot told him.

“Both of his loves have died, so I understand why he was hesitant.” Gwaine said, staring into the fire.

“Both?” Eoin asked.

“Oh. Uh, yeah, he’s had two loves in his life. I’m not sure I should say, but, I don’t see the harm I guess. Just, don’t let on that I told you about them, yeah?” Once the others all nod in agreement, Gwaine continues. “His first love was his friend Will, from Ealdor. They only had a few months together because he was sent to Camelot by his mother. Arthur was there when Will died.”

“He never said anything. I knew he was upset, but I thought it was just because it was a friend who died. Knowing that was his first love...” Arthur shook his head and scoffed. “And all I could tell him by the funeral pyre was about the dangers of magic. He must have hated me.”

“He could never hate you, Arthur. But he couldn’t bring himself to tell you about that part of his life. It involved his magic and his first love being a boy. Can you say that back then you would have accepted any of that?” Gwaine asked him.

“I honestly don’t know.” Arthur responded.

“And Merlin being who he is, would never want to cause you any conflict. That’s just how he was. Especially then when you hadn’t known each other that long. He was only 15 or 16 at that point. He had only just turned 16 just before I came along.” Lancelot said.

“Who was his second love?” Corbett asked, unable to contain his curiosity.

“Her name was Freya. She, uh, was a druid girl. I don’t know anything about her other than she’s behind Merlin’s obsession with strawberries. He always gets a far off look in his eyes when he’s thinking about her. He told me that he was going to run away with her, leave Camelot behind and build a life with her. I didn’t want to pry. I didn’t - don’t- want thinking about those unhappy endings to affect what we have. Guess I’m being a little selfish there.” Gwaine said.

“Nothing wrong with wanting to see him happy, Gwaine.” Leon said. “He’s honestly the only person I’ve met that cares more of others’ happiness over his own. It’s your job to change that.”

“As long as he doesn’t start trying to get me to learn Gaelic or French or anything.” Gwaine said. This caused the others to laugh. After a few more moments they turned in for the night, all a little more relaxed than they had been at the start of the day. Lancelot stayed by the fire by Gwaine a little while, hoping to talk to him.

“Something on your mind, Lance?” Gwaine asked him after a few moments.

“I just wanted to see how you’re doing?” Lancelot asked him.

“I honestly don’t know. I have no idea. Seeing him sick like that...Lance, he stopped breathing.” Gwaine was trying to keep from reliving those horrifying moments. His voice was thick with emotion. “I thought...I thought I’d never get to see him smile again. Or hear him laugh. Or just say my name.” He wiped a tear off that had escaped his eye.

“It’s alright to fear for those we love. I wanted to let you know how lucky you are. When Gwen chose Arthur over me, I was upset. But, I moved on. Merlin was there to help me. There was a brief moment that I thought we could comfort each other. It’s hard to miss how beautiful he is, afterall, inside and out. It wasn’t meant to be, though. He never said anything, but I would see the way he lit up when you came in the room. Something in his eyes.” Lancelot told him.

“And I was blind to it. All this time we could have had together, and I never saw it.”

“I think you did. Or, you didn’t know what it was you saw, anyway. You haven’t had any relations since becoming a Knight. You’ve flirted, but nothing ever came of it.”

“I suppose you’re right. Do you think...do you think he’ll be able to forgive me? For not visiting him?”

“I do. I think when you’re ready, it’ll be the right time for both of you.”

“I hope you're right. I just need a little more time.”

“When you are ready, let me or Arthur know. Can you do that?” Lancelot asks, looking him in the eyes.

“Yeah, I suppose I can. I’m turning in.” Gwaine headed to his bedroll.

Once everyone was asleep, Lancelot snuck off through the trees, knowing he wasn’t far from where he dropped Merlin off. He found the camp pretty easily, and the Druids welcomed him. Merlin was sitting in front of a fire making shapes out of the flames and embers. Lancelot smiled at this. When Merlin saw Lancelot, he smiled brightly and a wave of happiness rushed out of him. Lancelot hugged him tightly until Merlin told him he couldn’t breathe.

“Lance, it’s great to see you!”

“Merlin, you look better. How are you feeling?”

“Eh, a little better. Missing you all. What are you doing out here, anyway?”

“Oh, we’re on a hunt, camped not far from here. So I decided to sneak away for a minute to check on you.” Lancelot kept his arm around Merlin as they sat in front of the fire for a while, just enjoying the sound of the crackling fire. 

“Thanks for bringing me here, Lance. It’s been helpful. You know I once wondered what could have happened if I’d gone to stay with the Druids instead of with Gaius in Camelot. But I never would have met you all. And I wouldn’t trade your friendship for anything.” Merlin leaned against Lancelot.

“Merlin. I don’t think I ever thanked you for your friendship. It meant so much to me after letting Gwen go, and she chose Arthur. I once thought that maybe we could have had something. Seeing you light up around Gwaine, though. I’m glad you have each other. Maybe one day you can help me find someone again.” Lancelot said.

“Thanks Lance. I’m sorry I couldn’t...that we couldn’t...You were the first friend I’d made that trusted me and kept my secret after leaving home. A night or two of sharing a bed together when we first met was nice, but we weren’t meant for each other. There’s someone out there for you Lance. I’ll help you find them.” Merlin confided.

“Listen, Merlin. I want to stay, I really really want to. But I fear if I’m gone too much longer, someone will notice. I need to get back to them. When you’re ready to come back just send a note to me or Arthur like you have in the past. Me and Corbett and Percival will come escort you back.” Lancelot had leaned his head against Merlin’s. Merlin nodded and walked to the edge of the camp with him, saying their goodbyes.  _ Tell the others I miss them _ . Merlin thought towards Lancelot’s retreating figure.

*******

A few days after returning from their hunting trip, Gwaine decided, he might finally be ready to see Merlin again. He had started to dream pleasant dreams about him again instead of the nightmares of his still form. He knocked on Arthur’s door and waited to be told to enter. When he went in, he found Arthur at his desk with Lancelot, Leon, and Corbett. Gwaine raised an eyebrow at the group.

“Gwaine, what brings you here?” Arthur asked, still smiling from whatever conversation had gone on before Gwaine came in.

“Lance told me that I should let you know when I was ready to see Merlin again. I was going to just go to his room, but since I promised, I’m stopping by to let you know.”

“Ah.” Arthur said, looking at Lancelot for a moment.

“What? Do you think he’s well enough to see me?” Gwaine asked, getting concerned by the silence.

“I don’t actually know.” Arthur said meeting his gaze. "None of us do."

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, Merlin has been gone for two weeks. He’s not in Camelot. Or rather, not in the castle.” Arthur clarified.

“What?” Gwaine’s breath rushed out. “Where is he?!”

“Gwaine, have a seat, please.” Arthur motioned for him to take a chair at the table. “After a week, Merlin wasn’t getting any better. He was sleeping only when Gaius gave him a potion, he wasn’t able to eat. I couldn’t watch him stay sick. I made the decision to send him to the Druids in hopes they could help him heal. Lancelot escorted him there. We’ve been waiting for word from them that he was well enough and ready to come back.”

“Lance?” Gwaine searched his friend's face for some sign this might not be true.

“I’m sorry. I couldn’t watch him continue on like he was. When we got to the camp, he made it only a few steps in and he collapsed. One of their healers, Merrik, told me that it was because he was overwhelmed. A lot of magic and telepathy and things I don’t think anyone other than Merlin could understand, were essentially assaulting his senses. He told me that Merlin would be asleep for a few days. I was planning to ride out and check on him in a few days. We were discussing this when you got here.” Lancelot told him. Gwaine was speechless. They had planned all this without him. Gwaine ran his hands through his hair, trying to keep calm, though his anger was quickly getting the best of him.

“It wouldn’t have done you any good to know that he wasn’t here.” Corbett said.

“Because you all seem to know what’s best for me, is that right?” Gwaine asked through gritted teeth.

“For once, Gwaine, this had nothing to do with you. This was about him. About Merlin. About him getting well and getting better control of his magic. We couldn’t afford for him to lose control and risk someone finding out about him and demand Arthur mete out Uther’s brand of justice. Not when the magic laws had only been changed recently.” This made Gwaine blanche when Leon said it.

“When he gets back I plan to set up a feast to celebrate the change in magical laws. I won’t do it without him. But. He needs to be well and he needs to be in control. At most, I was willing to let him be gone a month. If Lancelot returns without him, that will give him another week before I go fetch him myself. The reason we hadn’t involved you, is because you are too close. Don’t argue it.” Arthur said forestalling any debate that Gwaine may come up with. “We all know that you love him, even if neither of you have said it out loud. You weren’t dealing with his illness. You were finding distractions. We didn’t want you to show up and be a distraction for him.”

“You think I would be a distraction?” Gwaine asked quietly.

“Yes. Gwaine, he didn’t understand why you hadn’t been to see him. He was trying to hide it, but we know how much it hurt him.” Corbett said.

“Is that why you’ve been avoiding me?” Gwaine asked, meeting his gaze.

“Yes. I’ve already told you my feelings regarding Merlin. Watching you break his heart made me...angry. He doesn’t deserve to be mistreated. He deserves someone who cares for him as much as he cares for others.” Corbett growled. Arthur put a hand on Corbett’s shoulder, trying to bring him back. “Sorry.”

“You need to decide what it is you want. You have at most a week to sort it out, and at the least, a few more days. If you need a break from training to take off and sort it out, your duties can be passed on.” Arthur said. Gwaine nodded.

“I, uh, I think I will take a couple days.“ Gwaine said standing, not meeting their eyes, and going to the door.

“Very well.” Arthur acknowledged. Before anyone else could say anything, Gwaine was already out the door and almost running down the corridor.

“That probably could have gone better.” Leon muttered.

“He needed to hear it, though.” Corbett said, still obviously upset with the other man.

“I’m changing my bet.” Arthur said.

“Oh?” Lancelot urged him to continue.

“I say they’ll be married within the month and will be trying to hide it.” Arthur announced. This caused the group to laugh, breaking the tension.

“I’ll note it down.” Lancelot chuckled. “I’m going the day after tomorrow. I’ll take Percival, and Corbett, if you still want to come?” Corbett nodded. “What do you want us to do if he isn’t ready to come back?”

Arthur scowled, eyebrows scrunching together. “We’ll play it by ear. He needs to be at full capacity when he comes back.”

“Understood.”

*******

Gwaine was in turmoil. There was no other word for it. He had gone to his room, packed some things for a few days, left his chain mail and cape on his table, and went to the stables. He made short work of readying his horse and was off less than an hour after speaking with...the others. He couldn’t be around them. His supposed friends. They had conspired and hidden the truth from him. Why had they not told him? He was determined to put as much space between him and Camelot. Maybe the distance would help him clear his mind. He made it over the border and stopped in the first town, at the first inn he came to just as the sun was setting. Gwaine tied up his horse and went in and paid for a room. He hung out in the Inn common area eating and having a few drinks. He was surprised when he saw a familiar face serving food.

“Gwen?”

“Gwaine! How are you?” She asked, giving him a quick hug. Gwaine saw the tears glistening in her eyes.

“I’ve been better. Had to get some air, so to speak. When you’re free, come sit with me. I could really use a friend.” He told her after getting a scathing look from the owner.

“Of course! I’m off in an hour. Don’t drink too much, and I’ll be by.” She chided him, and then went on serving others. He was glad that he found someone he trusted to be honest with him. He sat and enjoyed the food, and did his best to keep his drinks to a minimum, but still had three by the time Gwen made it over to join him. She sat down next to him, a heavy sigh escaping her.

“How did you end up in a place like this?” Gwaine asked her.

“Seemed as good a place as any. This was the first place I came to that was willing to hire me. I stay in the next town over with a family that was kind enough to take me in in exchange for help with some farm work.”

“I’m sorry for what you’ve been through.” Gwaine said, patting her hand that was on the table.

“Thank you.” Gwen said, wiping a tear that had escaped. “Now, why don’t you tell me why you are out here?” She said placing her other hand on top of his that was still on hers.

“You remember Merlin was sick, yeah? Well, I, uh, didn’t handle it well. He…” Gwaine had to catch his breath, “he died. He was dead, Gwen. Gaius was able to get his heart beating again and we got him breathing again, but his heart had stopped.” Gwaine took a deep drink. “Everytime I close my eyes, I see him lying there. Unmoving.” He shuddered. “I couldn’t bring myself to see him. For a whole week, the other Knights and Arthur all went and spent time with him. But I couldn’t go. After a few weeks, I thought maybe I was ready to go see him only to find out that he had been sent away to some healers because he hadn’t been getting better under Gaius’ ministrations. They hid it from me. Though I guess it wasn’t really hiding since I couldn’t bring myself to see him. Maybe Corbett was right, and I don’t deserve him.” Gwaine said staring at the table as if it would give him the answer.

“Gwaine.” He looked up when she said his name softly. “We all know how much you care for him. He knows it too. Don’t give up.”

“I’ve never told him how I felt about him. What if I don’t get the chance to now? What if the damage is done and he moves on? You know, he’s the reason I kept coming back to Camelot. I don’t think I could watch him move on without me.”

“You won’t.” She reached up and forced his chin up and met his eyes. “He loves you. He’s my best friend and I’ve never seen him so happy as he is with you. This is just a bump in the road. Next time you see him, tell him everything. Better yet, show him. Ok? Merlin needs you, just as much as you need him. You’re a good match.”

“Ah, Gwen. Always with the words of wisdom. You’re right of course. You know this can apply to you, as well? Arthur still cares for you. He’s just hurting right now. When Merlin is back by his side, he’ll help him see sense, I’m sure of it.”

“Thank you, Gwaine. So. Since we’re talking about our loves, tell me. What is your favorite thing about Merlin?” She asked, changing the subject.

“Now that’s not fair. There’s too much!” Gwaine exclaimed. “Hmm. Well he has the most beautiful heart I’ve ever encountered. Always caring for those around him, never thinking to take care of himself. Of course those deep blue eyes and stunning cheekbones help too. What about you?”

“Well, Arthur always tries to put a mask on around everyone. Tries to keep himself hidden. But he was always willing to listen and trust those around him based on their deeds and not their station. He may have been a prat, as Merlin would say, of a Prince, but he changed. Merlin changed him. Their friendship. Merlin helped him to trust his instincts, which then led to Arthur changing the rules making it so a peasant could become a Knight.” She said, blushing.

“Yeah, I think he only lets that mask slide for you and Merlin.” Gwaine laughed.

“You may be right. Did you know that Merlin was there when he proposed?”

“What?!” Gwaine started laughing. “Well, Merlin is quite the romantic.” Gwaine smiled remembering a stolen moment and a rose. When he looked up Gwen was eyeing him waiting for him to share. “After the whole lamia incident, when we had given him his space, and then he went to the lower town to tell a story? Well, he pulled me down an alley after and gave me a rose and apologized for not being ready to forget just yet. It was very romantic. I think that’s when I knew.” Gwaine said, smiling down in his drink.

“That is beautiful! You know, whenever I would get flowers I knew Arthur had told him to get me something. I’m not surprised Arthur relied on him to help with the proposal.” Gwen’s face became very sad remembering what happened that week.

“It wasn’t your fault.” Gwaine said, putting an arm around her. “There was dark magic at play in Camelot that week. We were aware of a threat, but we had no way to track who or what the target was. I think that you must have been the target. Someone didn’t want you on the throne.”

“You might be right. Maybe one day, Arthur can forgive me. For now I have to work on being able to make my peace with it. I do miss you all though. How is Elyan doing?”

“You know you’re brother. Dives in to work and tasks to avoid his feelings. Percival has been keeping an eye on him. Making sure he knows how sorry we are and that we’re here for him. He does miss you though.” Gwen smiled at him.

“I need to be going. I have to be up early to help with the chores. Try not to beat yourself up too much, Gwaine. Arthur was a mess when Uther was sick and dying. It’s not easy to see someone you know to be so strong, brought down. Merlin is strong. And he loves you. Stick with him.” She gave him a hug and then left him to sit there and think about what they had talked about.

After another couple drinks, he stumbled his way to his room, hoping for a dreamless drunken sleep. When he closed his eyes, he felt an ache in his chest knowing that he was falling asleep and waking up alone. He rolled on his side and imagined a pair of dark blue eyes, like the depths of a lake, looking at him full of adoration. He thought he imagined the feel of his hand cupping his cheek. A tear ran down his nose dripping onto the pillow. The hand he thought he had imagined wiped it away and he felt a kiss on his brow. He opened his eyes and tentatively reached out to touch the pale skin. He gasped when his hand met skin.  _ I miss you _ . Came the voice in his mind.  _ And I, you _ . He thought it as hard as he could, hoping the message came through. The other man smiled.  _ How are you here? _ Gwaine thought. Merlin just grinned at him.  _ I’m not really here, love. I can only keep this up for a little longer. You are too far away. My magic reached out to you when I fell asleep, I guess. Why are you so far away? Am I that much of a burden to you? _ Merlin’s eyes were so sad, Gwaine hated that he had been the cause.  _ I needed to get away from the others. The Knights and the Princess. They kept it from me that they sent you away. It’s my own fault, I know. Corbett scolded me for breaking your heart. I never meant to make you feel that way. I care for you too much.  _ Gwaine was running his fingers through Merlin’s hair, leaning his forehead forward to touch the other.  _ I’m sorry that I frightened you. But, I’m going to be selfish for once. I want you, Gwaine. I can’t bear to lose you now that we’ve found each other. Part of being with me is understanding my destiny. There’s so much, so many relying on me. I just wanted this one thing for myself.  _ Merlin gripped the back of Gwaine’s neck as if he was drowning and Gwaine was keeping him afloat.  _ I am yours.  _ Gwaine felt soft lips on his and felt whole again. He hadn’t realized that Merlin being gone had left him feeling so empty. When he opened his eyes, he looked into shining golden ones.  _ Beautiful. _ He felt Merlin let out a small laugh.  _ I’m losing the connection, love. I have a few more things to learn here, but I promise to be back soon. Will you come when Lance comes to get me? _ Merlin asked, eyes, shining with anticipation.  _ If that is what you wish, I will be there. _ Gwaine smiled at him.  _ More than anything. Rest now.  _ Merlin’s hands began to fade and soon Gwaine was looking at the wall. He didn’t care that he was a grown man, a Knight, even. He cried himself to sleep.

In the morning he decided to go to one more place, before returning to Camelot. He’d only been to Ealdor the once with Lancelot and Percival, but he remembered the route easily enough. By midday he was tying up his horse and standing in front of Hunith’s door. He was a mess. Why was he so nervous? He met Hunith the last time he came through, now should be no different. But it was. Finally, after a few breaths, he knocked on the door.

“Gwaine! How nice to see you. Come in, come in! Would you like something to eat? I was just making some lunch.” Hunith opened the door wide and shut it behind him.

“Lunch would be lovely.” He said as she pushed him towards a chair and forced him to sit.

“Now, what brings a Knight of Camelot out here? Is Merlin ok? He writes to me often, but I feel he leaves out much.” Hunith was eyeing him with interest now.

“I don’t suppose he’s written about me at all, then?” Gwaine asked, curious as he took a bite of the sandwich that Hunith had given him.

“He might of done.” She smiled at him.

“Well, I wanted to come by since I was in the area. Taking a quick break from being a Knight. I wanted to talk to you about your son, actually.” Gwaine said, trying to keep his nerves under control. He had started sweating.

“Really?” Hunith questioned, giving him a raised eyebrow and a knowing smirk. “What is it about My son you want to talk about?” Gwaine found it hard to breathe. He cleared his throat.

“I, uh, I’m sure you’re aware by now that Merlin and I have been seeing each other. Courting, so to speak, for some months now. I care for him. Very deeply. I was wondering if, not now, but, in the future, if I could get your blessing to marry him? I know it’s fast, or it seems that way. But I can’t imagine my life without him. And one day, I’d like to share all that I am and all that I have with him.” Gwaine said and looked at Hunith for a reaction. She smiled at him sweetly.

“As long as he is happy, you have my blessing. I know how he feels about you from his letters. You take care of my boy. He may not think it, but he deserves the world. You need to show him he’s worthy of it.” She patted his arm. They finished their meal and then went for a walk through the village, to the trees. Gwaine let out a whistle when they came upon a hulking tree. It was an apple tree.

“Is this...?” He started to ask, trailing off.

“Yes. This is Will’s apple tree.” Hunith answered.

“It’s wonderful.” Gwaine said, smiling at Merlin’s mother.

“He is capable of amazing things. But sometimes he’s afraid of himself. You must be strong for him. I know you can be. He told me some of your adventure to the Fisher King’s land. Arthur was Courage, you were Strength, and he was Magic.” Hunith sighed, heavily. “I know he has a destiny to fulfill. You mustn't let him forget to enjoy life though.”

They turned and headed back to the village. It was already late afternoon. Hunith invited Gwaine to rest there for the night, which he accepted. In the morning, she made them breakfast before he set out. Before he could leave, she gave him something.

“When you are ready, give him this. His father left it with me. We had planned to wed, before the Knights came for him. We never got the chance. I’m counting on you to make him not feel alone.” She looked at him sternly. He bent down and kissed her hand.

“I will spend my life ensuring he knows he’s cared for and adored.” Gwaine took off then and headed back to Camelot. He was smiling the whole way.

*******

Lancelot, Percival, and Corbett had mounted up and were preparing to leave, but were stopped before they made it to the gates. Lancelot had hoped that they could sneak away without being caught. He should have guessed that Gwaine wouldn’t let them go without him. When he came back the previous night, he seemed much happier. Everyone who saw him noticed the change.

“Don’t think you’re making this trip without me. I promised him I’d be there.” Gwaine told them as he caught up.

“How could you have promised him?” Corbett asked.

“I’m not sure how it worked exactly. It was a magic thing, that’s all I’m telling.” Gwaine said, blushing slightly remembering.

“Uh-huh.” Percival had caught the blush and was smiling crookedly at him.

“Nope, not sharing. Let’s get going, shall we?” Gwaine gestured for Lancelot to lead the way. Lancelot rolled his eyes and they were off.

After a few hours, they finally arrived at the Druid camp. Before he could say anything, Gwaine had taken off running. The others hurried to try and see what was going on. When they caught up, they found a startled group of Druids, some laughing, and Gwaine and Merlin tangled on the ground together. Lancelot and Percival laughed at the pair, while Corbett just grinned. Gwaine didn’t care. As soon as they had stopped, he felt a tug, and knew it was Merlin’s magic. He hadn’t thought he could get there fast enough. When he got to the center of the camp, Merlin just stood there, smiling at him. He was wearing a deep green shirt, which Gwaine thought he looked fantastic in. In no time, he had flung himself at the other man, only for them to crash to the ground. He laughed softly as he breathed in Merlin’s scent. Merlin was doing the same to him, their heads touching, neither daring to move in case it was a dream.

“I’ve missed you.” Gwaine found himself saying. Though he knew it didn’t cover the way he felt.

“And I, you” Merlin grinned.

“Oi, love birds, maybe you should go somewhere more private.” Percival called out, causing more laughter and some whistling. Gwaine stood up, and helped Merlin to his feet, but pulled him in close, not willing to let him go yet. Merlin wrapped his arms around Gwaines waist, while Gwaine wrapped his around Merlin’s neck. As they stood there, Merlin’s magic surrounded them, earning several gasps from the onlookers.

“Please don’t leave like that again.” Merlin whispered.

“I promise not to leave unless you say so.” Gwaine whispered back. Merlin couldn’t hold back any longer and put his hands in Gwaine’s hair pulling him in until their lips met. They were in the center of their own little whirlwind all of a sudden. Merlin hadn’t wanted to share this moment with all of the camp. Gwaine was eager to show Merlin how much he missed him and how sorry he was for being so foolish. When they finally broke apart, their faces were flushed, and Gwaine could see the gold of Merlin’s eyes as he stopped the wind around them. Interlocking their fingers, they walked over to the other Knights who were grinning at them like fools. Each took turns hugging the warlock. Percival even picked him up and spun him around, ruffling his hair when he set him back on the ground.

“I guess you’re feeling better.” Corbett said, smiling at the younger man. Merlin nodded and smiled at them.

“Yeah, it took some time, but, I think I’m good now.”

“Do you think you’ll be ready to leave tomorrow?” Percival asked.

“I think so. There’s a few more things I need to do, but I think we can get them done by then. Plus that’ll give you all time to come up with a story I’ll believe about why Gwaine wasn’t told about me being here.” Merlin met Lancelot’s gaze, and saw a flicker of defiance. Merlin looked to Percival, who looked at the ground, not meeting his eyes, Corbett met his gaze managing to keep a straight face. Gwaine squeezed his hand.

“There’s a lot we need to discuss before we return. We’ll talk tonight though.” Gwaine assured him.

“Merlin. Do your, uh, friends, need anything to eat or drink?” A middle aged Druid man asked.

“Iseldir, this is Sirs Lancelot, Percival, Corbett and Gwaine. Knights of the Round Table for King Arthur. This is Iseldir, he is the leader of this camp.” Merlin made the quick introductions. Iseldir started to protest, until Merlin shot him a look. The other’s had caught it, though.

“Merlin, you remember we already know the truth, right? You don’t have to hide anything.” Percival urged. Merlin met his eyes, and sighed.

“I forget sometimes, Perce. You all remember then?” Merlin was looking at his feet.

“We do.” Percival confirmed.

“Good, then we won’t worry about embarrassing Emrys with the formalities then.” Iseldir said. “If you’ll follow me, we have food prepared, and you can rest for a bit. There are a few more things that need to happen before Emrys returns to the Once and Future King.” They made their way through the camp and stopped at some tables that had been thrown together. Gwaine wasn’t ready to let Merlin go just yet. They kept their hands clasped tightly.

“I’ll be back. Sit, eat. Tell them some of your infamous tavern stories. I don’t think I’ll be long.” Merlin said, leaning in to Gwaine’s ear.

“Reach out to me if you need me. I’ll come running. If you don’t leave now though, I fear I won’t be able to hold myself back. Gwaine whispered back against Merlin’s ear. Merlin nodded and, reluctantly, let Gwaine’s hand go and walked with Iseldir away from the tents. Gwaine stayed put watching him leave until hands pushed him down to a chair at the table in front of some stew.

“So, care to tell us how you ‘promised’ Merlin you’d be here?” Lancelot asked.

“Uh, well, I was in a bad way after I left Camelot. Made it just over the borders of Essitir, and stopped at the first inn I came to. Ran into an old friend and maybe drank a little too much. When I went to bed, I thought I was imagining him laying next to me. But he touched my face and somehow, it was real. He was there, but not there. We talked, though not out loud. He could either hear my thoughts, or he knew what my responses were going to be.” Gwaine reached up to touch his chest as he remembered the ache he felt. “Anyway, I promised that I would be here when he was ready to come back.”

“Are you alright?” Percival asked.

“I’m better now. I’ll be much better when he’s in sight again. It just feels...empty, when he’s not near. I can’t explain it.” Gwaine said, then he noticed the knowing grins on the other men’s faces. He rolled his eyes. “Yeah, yeah, I know. I plan to tell him soon. I won’t lose him again. That’s the most you’re going to get out of me. I don’t need you telling everyone how I sound like a lovestruck girl.”

“Were you at that inn for the two nights you were gone, then?” Corbett asked.

“No. I, uh, went to see someone else after.” Gwaine felt his face flush with color.

“And?” Percival urged him to continue.

“And, I went to see Hunith.” He finished in a huff.

“You’re kidding!” Lancelot exclaimed, with a huge smile on his face. Gwaine shifted in his seat.

“That’s wonderful! What did she say? I assume you went to ask her about something in particular?” Percival pushed.

“Maybe. I’m not telling you though. Just enjoy this nice meal, and I can pretend you aren’t looking at me as if flowers are sprouting from my head.” Gwaine said, digging into his own meal. He hadn’t missed the knowing glance between the other Knights.

They decided to explore the camp a little bit when they finished eating. They spoke with the Druids who lived there who talked about Merlin with reverence and awe. Merrik had found them and was telling them a little about what had gone on while Merlin was healing. As the sun fell below the horizon, a warm, swift wind swept through the camp. Everyone stopped what they were doing in anticipation. As soon as the sun fully sank, and the stars started lighting the sky, a wave of golden light rolled over them. It had enveloped the camp so there were little golden lights that were twinkling in the air all around them. The light had brought a warmth with it. It wasn’t a heat, but a feeling of warmth. Much like love. Lancelot, Percival and Gwaine recognized it as it was similar to the shield Merlin had used during the Dorocha. The wind that had swept through swept back the opposite direction, pulling the golden lights with it. In the sky a jet of light shot up and exploded out. The Knights all recognized this move and smiled at each other. Merlin. As the golden dust settled around the awed Druids, they waited for their friend to return. When he walked back in the camp, his eyes were still shining. The gathered Druids all bowed to him. He shifted uncomfortably from foot to foot, not liking the attention, but clearly having lost the battle about how to deal with it. Gwaine walked over to him then and grabbed his hand, giving him comfort and reassurance. Merlin smiled at him. The Druids all rose and went back to finishing their chores.

“We are grateful that Emrys has spent this time with us, but we know that he still has a destiny to fulfill. Tomorrow there will be a celebration for as much of a proper send off as we can give our King. Lancelot, may I have a word?” Iseldir said. Lancelot nodded and followed the man.

“How may I be of service?” Lancelot asked, once they were out of earshot of the others.

“King Arthur had sent me a letter about a week after Merlin arrived. I’d like to entrust the response to you.” He said, handing a sealed letter to the Knight.

“Of course.” Lancelot said, accepting the letter.

“I trust you know that Arthur plans to hold a celebration for the change in laws by inviting the Druids to Camelot?” Iseldir asked.

“I’m aware.”

“Good. We plan to have our King in attendance and to ensure he gets the respect and honor he deserves. Do you think you would be able to convince him, Merlin, that is, to go through with it?”

“I think between the Knights, King Arthur, and Gwaine, we can probably convince him of anything. Well, almost anything.” Lancelot gave a small laugh.

“Good, I’m glad to hear it. About Sir Gwaine, do you know what his intentions are?”

“That I do. We have a wager going to see how long it will be before there is a proposal or a wedding.” Lancelot was grinning.

“Wonderful! If the proposal happens sooner rather than later, you must let us know. There are certain Traditions that we hold that I know Merlin would want to include.”

“Of course. Although, I’d hope you would extend the same courtesy. We have a feeling they may sneak away and marry in secret. In which case I think this may be the first place they’ll come.” Lancelot said.

“I believe we have an agreement then. Now, get some rest. Tomorrow is going to be full of activity to send Emrys back to his King.”

When they got back to the others, there was a crowd gathered around the fire. Merlin was sitting on a stool next to the fire telling a story by creating moving images with the embers. His eyes were solid gold the entire time. He was telling some tale about Bruta, the first King of Camelot. Everyone was amazed and stared in awe. Merlin told how Bruta, on his deathbed, had asked to be taken deep in the forest. When he was far enough in, he thrust his mighty sword, Excalibur, in solid stone. It was enchanted to only be able to be pulled free by the true King of Albion. The Once and Future King, who, with Emrys’ aide, would bring peace and prosperity to the land. The last image he created was that of Excalibur in the stone and an image of Arthur pulling it free and raising it to the heavens. As the images faded, there were shouts of joy. Once everyone calmed, they began retiring for the night.

“Was any of that true?” Percival asked Merlin. Merlin blushed. It was his first time telling the story that he had been working on.

“It might be.”

“Mm. I take it this is something you think will be useful in the future?” Corbett asked, tilting his head slightly. Merlin shrugged.

“I think it is important for the tale to get around. It feels…” Merlin paused, pursing his lips, “it feels like it is going to be relevant soon. I can’t explain it.”

“I don’t like it when you get funny feelings like this.” Lancelot said. “It usually means something bad is going to happen.”

“Something is coming. I just don’t know how long we have.” Merlin told them looking at the ground.

“Great. On that note, let’s get some rest. There is going to be a feast tomorrow and lots of activity to send off the King of the Druids.” Percival said reaching out a hand and giving Merlin’s shoulder a playful squeeze. Merlin just blushed and rolled his eyes.

Iseldir led them all to tents where they could rest for the night. Everyone quieted down and the night settled heavily around them. Gwaine and Merlin just lay down looking into each other’s eyes, hands interlocked. Merlin found he could no longer keep his eyes open, and drifted to sleep listening to the sound of Gwaine’s breathing.

When morning came, Gwaine and Merlin had managed to become entangled and were not unhappy with their predicament. However, as it was Merlin’s last day with the Druids, Merrik, Iseldir, and even Lancelot had come in the tent to try to get him up. Though Gwaine found Merlin’s refusal to get up endearing, he knew the quicker his love got on with the day, the quicker they could get back to Camelot and to spending more time together without interruptions.

“Merls, you really need to get up. Otherwise I believe the whole camp will pass through here.” Gwaine said gently. Merlin groaned and opened his eyes.

“Fine. I’m awake.” Merlin yawned and stood up stretching his long, lithe body. Gwaine savored the sight of him, and was pulling Merlin in for a kiss by his shirt before he could utter a protest. Merlin reacted eagerly and soon the pair were laying down again, Merlin over Gwaine, Gwaine’s hands running up Merlin’s back. Merlin let out a whimper then. “Wait, wait.” He paused, breathing heavily. “My magic is not that under control yet. At least not when I first wake up.” He said, eyes closed.

“Open your eyes, Merlin.” Gwaine told him. When he did, they were the purest gold that Gwaine had ever seen. Like sunlight and fire. He couldn’t help himself and pulled Merlin’s lips to his again, eager to express his love.

“Alright, you two, knock it off!” Corbett’s voice cut through their moment. When Gwaine looked around, he noticed that there was a shimmering field around them that must have extended outside their tent. There were several laughs heard from outside, and the two men laughed themselves before getting up.

“To be continued?” Merlin asked, almost pleadingly.

“To be continued.” Gwaine agreed, giving him one last quick kiss. Once they emerged, Merlin was quickly ushered off by the Druids, while Gwaine watched his love being pampered and catered to.

“So. When do you think you’ll ask him?” Came a voice from beside him. Gwaine looked over at Corbett, and sighed.

“I don’t know. I don’t want to wait too long, but, it’s too soon isn’t it? I mean we’ve only been together a few short months. Is it too soon? What do you think?” Gwaine asked him, sincerely.

“I don’t think it’s too soon. You know that you messed up before, so I don’t think I have to worry about you making that mistake again. Just know that you have a lot to answer for if you hurt him. From all of us.” Corbett let his words sink in and then turned away.

“Noted.” Gwaine said over his shoulder, unwilling to turn away from the direction the Druids had taken Merlin.

As midday approached, banners had been set up, flowers were everywhere, and musicians were playing while children danced and climbed on Percival. Corbett, Lancelot, and Gwaine were all laughing at the sight. A hush fell over everyone as the sun arrived directly overhead. Waves of energy were pulsing through the camp, like a heartbeat. Merrik and Iseldir led a barefoot Merlin into the clearing looking regal, and not at all Merlin-like. There was a simple gold and silver circlet placed on his head, while he wore dark blue trousers and a cream colored short-sleeved shirt, complemented by dark blue painted markings on his arms and creeping up his neck from under his shirt. His eyes were a blazing gold. Everyone in the clearing faced him then, raising their arms to the sky and began reciting something in a language the Knights didn’t recognize. As they spoke, the markings on Merlin’s arms began to glow. He gasped and his head tilted back. Gwaine rushed forward to his side to steady him. No one stopped him. When the recitation stopped, everyone kneeled. Merlin put his hands together and raised them to the sky where a triskele appeared. He then knelt and slammed his hand to the ground and the triskele spun before crashing down over the camp and rushed out over the land. Merlin stood slowly with Gwaine’s help. The gathered Druids erupted into cheers, while the Knights that were present were in shock at the power they had felt rush over them. Gwaine followed Iseldir and Merrik as they headed to a spot that he guessed was for Merlin to sit down. He never took his arm from around Merlin, feeling his love unsteady on his feet. Once Merlin was sitting he gave Gwaine a small smile of thanks. They ate together and all too soon, it was time for the group from Camelot to return to the citadel. Their belongings had already been packed by the Druids and placed on their waiting horses. Merlin was having trouble as his eyes were still glowing.

“Here, wear this hood. It will probably take several hours before your power comes back under control.” Merrik said, handing over a hood that left his arms free, but covered his face fully. It was a dark blue that matched his trousers.

“Thanks. And thank you for helping me these past few weeks.” Merlin said shaking hands with the Druid.

“The pleasure was ours, Emrys. Anytime you need anything, you are always welcome. We look forward to meeting The Once and Future King soon” Iseldir said, also shaking his hand. Merlin nodded and climbed on the back of Gwaine’s horse pulling the hood low over his face.

No one spoke as they rode towards Camelot. Merlin kept his head down and pressed against Gwaine’s back the whole way. When they got to the castle steps, they were met by George who informed them they were to report to the King’s chambers immediately. When they arrived, Lancelot knocked and waited for the King’s voice before opening the door. Merlin stayed to the back of the group. His senses felt overwhelmed again since the ceremony earlier, though he knew that the others weren’t sure what exactly happened.

Arthur was sitting at his desk when they entered. The Knights stopped in front of the desk waiting for acknowledgement. Lancelot handed Arthur a letter. Merlin was struck by the dark circles under the King's eyes. Had he lost weight? Merlin was trying his best to keep his magic contained, but he felt his chest constricting at the sight of an unhealthy and unhappy looking Arthur. He backed away from the group until he was back against the door. They had all turned to look at him, Arthur finally looking up saw the distress and how Merlin’s magic was reacting. It had started to rumble outside as clouds rolled in. Merlin placed his hands on his knees trying to get his breathing under control. He felt the tendrils of energy coming off of him like lightning. They were saying his name, but he couldn’t break free or release the magic that had built up.

“I need to go outside. I’m sorry.” He said and was off stumbling to the battlements. When he got there he stopped fighting his magic. He tipped his head back and released it to the darkening sky, causing several bursts of thunder and some lightning. After several moments, he felt his breathing even out again. When he turned to go back inside, he saw the group had followed after him. “Sorry, I, er, wasn’t expecting that.” Arthur rolled his eyes.

“If you’re done being dramatic, again, let’s take this back inside.” He said and strolled back to his chambers.

When they were back in the room, Arthur sat back behind his desk intent on finishing what he was working on before Merlin’s episode, including reading the letter Lancelot had handed him. Merlin stayed back by the doors, not trusting himself to stand so close to the King just yet.

“So, who wants to start?” Arthur asked, finally looking up. The Knights all looked at each other. “Lancelot, please start talking.”

“I’ll do what I can, but I’m not sure I can even explain everything.” He told of how they arrived at the camp, what happened that night, and started telling of the ceremony that they witnessed. Arthur kept his face stone still through the whole thing.

“Merlin.” Arthur called his name, and Merlin looked up to meet his gaze.

“Yes, Arthur?”

“What was this ceremony that took place?” Arthur showed no emotions. Merlin cleared his throat, searching for the right words.

“It was a sort of acceptance ceremony. They pronounced their belief that their leader had come and when they did, I...was connected to them. To every Druid. Everywhere. I felt their magic connect with mine. They effectively tied themselves to me, I guess. Sort of like how the Knights swear their fealty and allegiance to you, so now the Druids are sworn to me.” Merlin said, keeping his head looking towards the ground.

“Why do you still have that hood on? Please take it off.” Arthur told him. He reached up, briefly hesitating, and then pulled it down. The Druids had kept the circlet at Merlin’s insistence, but they had donned a leather band stitched with the triskele around it on him in its place. Arthur took it all in, noting the circlet down to the fine clothing Merlin wore and the marks on his arms. “In a few weeks, there is to be a celebration along with a feast, with the Druids.” Arthur said, coming to stand in front of Merlin. “I expect their leader to be there to cement an alliance.” Merlin’s breath caught.

“You mean…”

“Yes, Merlin. I mean you. I cannot expect a Druid camp leader to accept an alliance when they would only follow the word of their true leader. You have a few weeks to prepare for it. But I expect you to be in attendance with your advisors.” Arthur said, not allowing room for negotiations.

“I don’t really have a choice in this do I?” Merlin asked quietly.

“You really don’t, no.” Arthur put a hand on his friends’ shoulder. “Your little ceremony was felt across the five kingdoms as far as I can tell. This alliance will help strengthen the peace we’ve been working towards. You aren’t going to be swearing any kind of allegiance to anyone, this is merely a meeting of equals. I need the people to see how good magic is and the good it can achieve. They need to know that Morgana’s way of doing things is not the only way. I need you to show people that. You’ve stood by me all these years, it’s my turn to stand by you.” Arthur never shifted his gaze from Merlin’s. The Knights who stood behind the King, were beaming. Merlin couldn’t speak, he simply nodded. “I imagine you’re exhausted by all the magic you’ve expended today. Go get some rest. I expect to see you tomorrow morning in time for the council meetings. Don’t worry about breakfast or training, I’ll have George take care of that. You need sleep, and I know Gaius will want to hear all about your weeks with the Druids. Gwaine, he needs rest.” Arthur turned and glared at the Knight who simply winked at him. The others grinned as Gwaine pulled Merlin’s hood back up and led him out of the room and down the corridor.

“I think you may actually win this bet, Sire.” Lancelot said, breaking the silence.

“Really?” Arthur asked.

“Apparently, while Gwaine took his few days, he went to see Hunith.” Corbett said. Arthur smiled.

“That’s great! I hope you boys are ready to pay up!” The King joked, showing some happiness after the weeks of silence and depression.

Gwaine led Merlin to his room where he promptly locked the door, ensuring they wouldn’t be disturbed. Merlin stood in the middle of the room in a daze. Gwaine removed Merlin’s hood and then led him over to the bed and had him sit down. He pulled off his boots and socks, then pulled his shirt up over his head, careful not to jostle the circlet he still wore. Gwaine grabbed a basin of water and a cloth and brought it over. When he moved the cloth over Merlin’s skin, the marks didn’t smudge or wipe away. He put the cloth down then and rubbed his hand over them. They were part of his skin, like tattoos.

“Merlin.” Gwaine said softly, trying to get his attention.

“Hmm?” Merlin responded, looking into Gwaine’s eyes finally.

“Love, when that ceremony took place, and they placed these marks on you, did they tell you what they meant?” Merlin kept his eyes trained on Gwaine’s.

“Sort of. I felt them imprint on me when the ritual began. I had a feeling they wouldn’t come off.”

“Ok. I just wanted to be sure you were aware.” Gwaine said and continued to wipe Merlin’s body down, savoring the appearance of the marks over the muscles that lined his body. Merlin reached a hand up and held Gwaine’s fast against his chest.

“You don’t need to do that.” Merlin told him.

“I suppose I don’t. But I want to.” Merlin reached forward and traced a finger along Gwaine’s jaw. Gwaine had closed his eyes and leaned in to the movement. Merlin moved the basin and cloth across the room with a thought and pulled Gwaine up from his knees.

“I know Arthur said I need to rest, but I don’t want to rest right now.” Merlin told him, standing and turning to push Gwaine on the bed. Merlin’s eyes were wild. Gwaine hadn’t moved to take his clothing off, but suddenly his shirt and trousers were gone leaving him in his underclothes. He raised an eyebrow at Merlin, whose eyes were shining such bright gold that Gwaine felt any self control he might have had melting away. When their lips met, it was like nothing he had felt before.

“Merls, you can’t kiss me like this. I won’t be able to control myself.” He said gasping for breath.

“Then don’t. I don’t want you to control anything. I don’t want to control anything. I just want to be with you. I need you to know how much I care for you. I can’t lose you, Gwaine. I love you.” Merlin said breathlessly.

“And I love you.” Gwaine responded. “I don’t want you to do this just because you think you have to, though.” Gwaine said, mentally kicking himself hoping that Merlin wouldn’t stop. He was kissing his neck and it was driving Gwaine mad with longing.

“I need this. I need you.” Merlin told him, pressing their heads together. “Please.” He whispered. Gwaine came undone at the tone of desperation in Merlin’s voice.

“I need you to answer one thing first.” Gwaine said, and rolled Merlin over and went to get what Hunith gave him and came back to the bed. “I went to your mother, and she gave me her blessing. Merlin, I want to spend my life with you. Marry me. Be mine and only mine, as I will be yours.” Gwaine pulled the ring out that had belonged to Merlin’s father.

“I am yours, Gwaine. Now and always.” Merlin answered, pulling Gwaine down so he could kiss him, smiling. Gwaine slid the ring on Merlin’s finger. There was a warm glow in the room that surrounded the lovers. The night was full of love, admiration, warmth, and ecstasy. They didn’t sleep much, unwilling to lose any more time they could spend together. As dawn approached, Gwaine stared at his lover. No, his fiance. He hadn’t planned to ask last night, but he couldn’t wait. He reached over and brushed some of Merlin’s now shaggy hair out of his face. He was sleeping soundly, and Gwaine was amazed at how peaceful he looked. The marks that lined his body were incredibly attractive. Gwaine slipped out of bed then, to prepare for his day of training. It would be a good day. He was sure of it. Before he left, after the sun finally came up, he pressed his lips to Merlin’s head. He couldn’t believe he was so lucky. He hoped they would be able to marry soon. After one last glance at the bed, he unlocked the door and headed about his day. 


	20. "Tonight?" "Tonight."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lots and lots of fluff for Merwaine.

The morning was a blur for Gwaine. He was in a world all his own. Training actually went well, but he found himself wanting to run back to his room, though he knew it would be empty soon, if it wasn’t already. His mind was caught reliving the night before. The other Knights had picked up on his change in mood and distracted thoughts. He had a far off look in his eyes, and kept glancing back toward the castle.

“Are you alright, Gwaine?” Elyan asked him.

“Great. Why?” He responded almost too quickly.

“I don’t buy it.” Leon said standing by Elyan.

“Buy what?” Gwaine asked, trying for innocence. 

“That! That right there. Something’s different…”Eyan said, and started to circle Gwaine to see if he could figure out what it was. .

“No!” Eoin shouted. Gwaine could see he’d figured it out and he only hoped he wasn’t blushing as much as he thought. It was at that moment that Arthur noticed what was going on.

“I thought I told you to let him sleep.” Arthur growled at him.

“Don’t look at me like that. I was planning to let him go straight to sleep. He, however, had other things on his mind. In all fairness, you should have told him to let me sleep.” Gwaine winked at the group. Arthur rolled his eyes and put a hand to his head. 

“Wow, Gwaine. Not what I was needing in my head this morning. Can we take this to mean anything in particular? Any questions or declarations exchanged?” Arthur asked, a wicked glint in his eyes. Gwaine cleared his throat hoping to give him enough time to come up with a believable lie or a distraction. All that happened was exclamations and shouts from the Knights surrounding them, as they took his delay for confirmation. 

“Have you set a date then?” Lancelot asked, grinning widely.

“I hadn’t intended to ask him last night. It just sort of came over me, and I couldn’t wait. No nothing has been set. Please just let us enjoy this.” Gwaine said before they could pester him with more questions. He noticed some coins being handed over to Arthur, and just rolled his eyes. After training he went to his room and found a rose on his pillow along with the circlet Merlin had worn. He smiled, wondering how long he had to wait to see him again.

Merlin had woken up to the sound of swords clashing and the sun shining in on his face. He smiled to himself. Last night had been amazing and wonderful. He glanced at his hand to see the ring Gwaine had given him. Knowing it was real and not a dream filled him with a warmth he hadn’t realized he was missing. He felt complete. He breathed in the scent of his lover from the sheets. Once he was well and awake, he got up and dressed in the clothes he’d worn the day before from the druids. He caught a glimpse in the mirror and had seen his eyes were stuck somewhere between blue and gold. He sighed and donned the hood to make the walk to Gaius. Before he left, he placed a rose on the pillow for Gwaine to find after training. He walked to the physician’s chambers, and gave Gaius a big hug before going up to his room to change. Once his arms were covered and he put on a red neckerchief to cover the marks that reached his neck, he joined his mentor for breakfast. When he sat down, Gaius simply sat and waited. Merlin rolled his eyes.

“You just can’t let me eat first, can you?”

“No, I can’t.” Gaius said, sternly. 

“When I got there, I was only conscious, briefly. I passed out after only making it a few steps in the camp. I couldn’t focus on anything. It felt...weird. Like I was disconnected or something. Out of sync. I’m not describing that right…It’s like I went from feeling muffled, to suddenly having all of my senses assaulted.” Merlin paused. “Anyway, when I woke up it was the fourth day since Lancelot had brought me there. Merrik and Iseldir met with me, bringing me food and making a plan of how to help sort of train me. They had some texts, but they were mostly just more spells. Nothing that explained what was happening with me. They had me sit in the open and describe what it was I felt, what I sensed. It took a few days for me to be able to keep my magic from just bursting out of me. I was able to direct it after that. Iseldir was worried about how my emotions tended to heighten my magic’s reaction. He helped me with breathing exercises and safe ways to expel the excess magic.” Merlin stopped so he could eat some before his breakfast got too cold. “At the end of two weeks, I’d learned nothing more about why or how I could do what I can do. But, I’d found a sort of peace being among the Druids. It felt empty though. Felt like something was missing.” Merlin touched his chest, unconsciously. “When I went to sleep, knowing that Lancelot would be coming in a few days, I thought of Gwaine. I pictured him, and I guess as I fell asleep, my magic reached out for him. He was at an inn in Essitir. He was upset. I reached out and I could touch him, Gaius. Like we were right next to each other. We were able to speak to each other for a little while before exhaustion overcame me and I fell asleep. One of the things I had been doing each evening at the camp, was going out to a clearing at sunset and safely expel some magic. I’ll show you sometime, because I can’t describe it very well. The Knights were there to witness it the night they got there, so you can ask them what it felt like. Anyway, the Druids had been planning a ceremony of sorts for before I left. They placed a gold and silver circlet on my head, carefully drew symbols all over my body, my arms, my feet and then dressed me in fine clothes. When the sun was directly overhead, the ceremony began. I felt so much magic around me, the symbols connecting me to it all. It pulsed through me and raced around. As I stood in front of the Druids, they began reciting. I don’t know if it was a spell or just a promise in the language of the Old Religion, but as soon as they said it, I could feel the connection being made from me to them and them to me. I might have fallen under the onrush of magic if not for Gwaine. He steadied me. When they finished speaking and knelt in front of me, I put my arms above my head and a huge golden triskele appeared. I pulled the magic down from the sky and through me to the ground. The magic rushed through me and raced across the land. I felt each and every magic user and Druid in that moment, Gaius. It was incredible.”

“The marks are still on you. I take that to mean they are now part of you?” Gaius asked, carefully.

“Yeah, they seem to be. When the Druids were chanting and connecting their magic to me, I felt them imprint on me. It didn’t burn, more like an itch I suppose. But I’m pretty sure they’re permanent. Gwaine had tried washing them off last night, but I knew it wouldn’t work.” Merlin started to blush remembering the night before. He played with the ring he now wore, and smiled. 

“I see there is something else you need to tell me about.” Gaius raised an eyebrow at him. Merlin laughed, softly.

“He, uh, went to see my mother a few days back and asked for her blessing. Last night he asked me to marry him.” Merlin smiled. When he looked up, Gaius was smiling back at him.

“I’m very happy for you, my boy. Now, as much as I want to keep you here to help me, you need to see to the King. He has had a hard time, and I know he needs your support.” 

“What do you mean, he’s had a hard time? No one’s told me anything that’s happened after I got sick. I can tell something is wrong. Arthur looked awful last night. There were dark circles under his eyes like he hasn’t slept and he looks like he hasn’t been eating well. Can you tell me what’s going on?” Merlin watched his guardian’s face for clues. He saw pain flash behind his eyes.

“That is something that you will need to speak with him about.” Gaius held up his hands to stop the irritated look. “Go. I’m sure he’s ready to head to his council meeting.” Merlin wanted to argue but stood up, hugged Gaius one last time, and then headed to the King’s chambers. 

Arriving at Arthur’s chambers, Merlin walked in, same as he always did, and found George helping Arthur out of his armor from training. He went over to the desk and started trying to sort through the stack of documents that Arthur had. When he looked up, George was gone, and Arthur was staring at him. 

“So what has been going on since I’ve been gone?” Merlin asked, hoping it would lead Arthur to tell him what was causing him such distress. 

“Merlin, what was the last thing I told you last night?” Arthur asked, walking towards the desk. 

“Erm, to get some rest?” Merlin responded, almost like it was a question instead of an answer. 

“Hmm. And, did you?”

“Yes, actually. I feel great.” Merlin said smiling and headed for the wardrobe to get some clean clothes for the meeting. 

“Really? Because, Sir Gwaine was very distracted during training today. Almost like he had other things on his mind.” Merlin dropped the clothes he’d been holding when he tripped, seemingly on his own feet, heat making its way up his face. 

“Hmm. I, uh, don’t know what that could have been.” Merlin knew he wasn’t fooling the King and busied himself cleaning up the mess he’d just made and set the clothes over the changing screen. When Merlin turned around, the King was right in front of him leaving no room to escape. He reached down and grabbed Merlin’s wrist bringing his hand up to examine the new jewelry. It was a simple band with another band in the middle that rotated around freely. Merlin felt heat flood his face and was sure his face must be the color of the Pendragon crest at this point. Arthur dropped his hand and, not saying anything, walked behind the screen to change. Merlin was still rooted to the spot, unable to get his feet to move. 

“You know, since Gwaine is a Knight, he was supposed to tell his liege when he planned to marry, get permission. Since he’s a Noble and all.” Arthur said, trying to keep from smiling, knowing that Merlin was in a bit of a panic.

“Mmm.” Was the only response he got. It took a lot for Arthur not to laugh.

“What do you think I should do, Merlin? Should I allow him to marry you?” Arthur asked coming out from behind the screen to get his other boots on. This seemed to snap Merlin back to the present. 

“Allow? Well, you could not allow it, but we’re still going to. So if you want to be there, then you’ll allow it.” Merlin said, grabbing the stack of papers from the desk.

“ _ If _ I want to be there?” Arthur asked incredulously.

“Yes, prat, if.” Merlin retorted. 

“Any idea when you want to do it?” Arthur asked, putting his arm on Merlin’s shoulders as they headed down the corridors. 

“Er, not really, no.” Merlin got a little quiet, not wanting to share his funny feeling with Arthur just yet, but the King being who he was, having spent many years with him, could already tell.

“No!” Arthur groaned. “Don’t tell me, I’m not sure I can handle another one of your funny feelings just yet.”

“Sorry. I can’t control them. I think we have some time, but it won’t be as long as we want it to be. Do you think after the celebrations you hold would be too soon? I just...I don’t want to wait. And I don’t think he does either. What? Why are you looking at me like that?” 

“I think after the celebrations would be perfect. It gives us a few weeks to plan it out. I’m of course going to be the one to give you away.” Arthur said ruffling Merlin’s hair.

“Says who?” Merlin asked laughing, but knowing it was true. Arthur gave him a wicked grin and raised an eyebrow challenging him. “Alright, fine.” They got a lot of strange looks as they walked in the council chamber Arthur still had his arm around Merlin. Merlin set down the papers, and then went to stand behind the King a bit, as was usual. Aggravaine was glaring daggers at Merlin. But he was too happy right now to let that man get under his skin. The meeting was long, there were preparations being made as Princess Mithian was on her way as an envoy of her father to discuss lands that were in dispute between Nemeth and Camelot. They would be arriving the next day and the King wanted to ensure everything was in readiness. Merlin was enjoying being in the background again. Having the Druids bow to him had been disconcerting. He just wanted them to treat him like a regular person, but that would not happen. While standing there listening to each member discuss various topics, Merlin found himself twisting the ring around his finger. Moving the middle band that rotated actually helped him focus more on what was being said. He’d have to thank his mother for such a good choice. They were talking about some change to some law. A magical law. That caught his attention. Apparently Aggravaine was still advocating against the changes Arthur had made. 

“How can we expect people to follow the restrictions set forward? It should remain banned, an executable crime.” 

“We’ve already discussed this,Uncle. The laws were passed, this council, aside from you, were all in agreeance that the change was long overdue. In a few weeks, the Druids will be coming to Camelot, along with their King. I have every faith that the alliance will hold.” Arthur said flatly. Several of the council members were actually gawking at him.

“The Druids have no King.” Aggravaine said.

“Sire, if I may?” Geoffrey asked. Arthur nodded at him. “There is only one man that would be King of the Druids. You’ve spoken with them, I take it?” 

“I have.”

“This is wonderful! The Druids have been waiting for the arrival of their King for centuries. Will he be in attendance at the celebrations?” Geoffrey was acting like an excited child, Merlin couldn’t help but smile. 

“He will.” Arthur stated simply. 

“How certain are you that you can trust this, King of the Druids?” Aggravaine spat the title out with venom and loathing. Merlin scoffed at this, and realized a little late he did it out loud and tried to cover it with a cough. Arthur, glared back at Merlin who tried to offer an apologetic shrug. 

“I’ve met him.” Arthur said looking at his Uncle. “I can assure you with one hundred percent certainty that he bears no ill will to anyone. Now, if that is all for today, and there are no NEW topics to discuss, this council is dismissed.” Arthur stood and headed for the door while Merlin gathered the papers he’d left behind. He ran to catch up to Arthur. Once they were in Arthur’s chambers he smacked Merlin on the back of his head. “Do you want to just announce to them now? This is to remain secret until the celebrations,  _ Mer _ -lin. Honestly I’m starting to wonder how you were able to keep anything a secret for any period of time.”

“I’m sorry, I did not mean to make that noise out loud. I really didn’t.” Merlin was raising his hands and backing away from Arthur who was walking up to him like he was going to pummel him. Merlin quickly put the papers down and tried keeping away from Arthur. It didn’t work and when a couple of the Knights came in to find Merlin and Arthur on the ground, Merlin’s head locked in Arthur’s arm while he ran his knuckles over his raven hair, everyone was laughing. 

“Alright! Alright! I’m sorry!” Merlin yelled, and Arthur finally released him. 

“Good, now go help the other servants get the guest chambers ready for the Princess and her repertoire.” Merlin tried patting his hair back down, since it was sticking up in several places now. When he got away from Arthur though, Leon, Percival, and Lancelot were messing his hair back up and punching him on the arm congratulating him. 

“I’m going to go before I get any more bruises from your displays of affection.” Merlin laughed and ran out the door when he saw Arthur start to lunge for him again. He wasn’t paying any attention and turned a corner and nearly ran straight into Aggravaine. Merlin quickly schooled his expression, and moved to keep walking down the hall, only for Aggravaine to step in his path again. Merlin looked at the man’s face to see what he was thinking. “Is there something you need, my lord?”

“Merlin. It seems you have different ideas on what a servant should and shouldn’t be doing during council meetings.” Aggravaine stepped closer to Merlin, and Merlin had to fight the urge to step back away from him. “Arthur has a soft spot for you, for some reason. I urge you to become more like other servants. Invisible. Seen and not heard. I’d hate to see anything happen to someone the King is so fond of.” He threatened. Merlin kept his face straight. He was the same height as Arthur’s Uncle, if not slightly taller. 

“Is that a threat, my lord?” 

“Consider it a warning. There’s already been damage done to your face from those slavers that long while back. It would be a shame if they found you again.” Aggravaine said reaching up to touch Merlin’s scar. He flinched back. 

“Merlin!” Corbett had come down the hall and seen him, calling his name and causing Aggravaine to take a step away and walk back down the corridor he’d come from. Corbett had reached him, and put a hand on his shoulder causing him to jump involuntarily. “Merlin? You alright? You look like you’ve seen ghost.”

“I’m f-fine.” Merlin cleared his throat. “I’m fine. I’ve got to go help the others get the guest quarters prepared.” Merlin said and tried to walk past Corbett, but the other man pulled him in an alcove.

“What? What did Aggravaine want?” Corbett asked.

“I can’t.” Merlin said and shook his head.

“Merlin. Tell me. I won’t say anything to Arthur. Was he threatening you?” Merlin couldn’t answer, he just nodded. “Merlin, you know we won’t let anything happen to you. Why would Aggravaine come after you?”

“He doesn’t like mine and Arthur’s relationship I guess. Says servants should be seen and not heard.” Merlin gulped. “He, uh, said it would be a shame if those slavers were to find out where I was.” Merlin touched his face where he knew his scar was. He wasn’t afraid of the man who’d done it, he knew he was dead, but his brother was still out there and Merlin wasn’t interested in being hunted again. 

“Hmm. Has this been going on long? This animosity between you and the King’s Uncle?”

“Mm. Remember when we said there was a traitor that while back? I’m almost certain it’s Aggravaine. I just can’t prove it. He’s the one who came to Gaius and inquired who Emrys was.” Merlin wasn’t lifting his gaze from the ground. Corbett exhaled a low whistle. 

“You’re not to be on your own, not so long as he has you in his sights. I’m going to have someone with you at all times. Don’t argue with me, you can either deal with them shadowing you, or you can enjoy the company. We keep losing you for a few weeks at a time here and there, and we all miss spending time with you. Don’t worry, I’ll get someone chatty for the first go around.” Corbett said and drug Merlin down the corridor to where the other servants were preparing the rooms. 

By evening Merlin was exhausted. They’d put fresh bedding on no less than 20 beds, scrubbed the floors, prepped the fireplaces, stacked firewood, and polished most of the other surfaces. When Merlin finally made it out of the rooms, he found Gwaine waiting for him. He made a mental note to thank Corbett for that. He walked up to his lover and kissed him in the middle of the hallway. Gwaine smiled. 

“Hey. Corbett told me I had to escort you around for a bit. You going to get the princess his dinner now?”

“Yeah, walk with me?” Merlin linked his fingers with Gwaine’s. 

“Of course.” When they got to the kitchens there were shouts and cheers all around. Diana was crying and hugging them both tightly. Merlin grabbed the King’s food and headed back down the corridor, while Gwaine recounted how he’d been caught this morning and the money that had exchanged hands. Merlin’s face was sore from laughing so hard. When they got to Arthur’s room, Gwaine opened the door for him. He was still smiling widely when he walked in, but his face fell when he met Aggravaine’s eyes. He set Arthur’s food down on the table and busied himself with picking up laundry and Arthur’s armor. He felt Aggravaine’s eyes on him the whole time, and sweat trickled down his back and beaded on his brow. Once Aggravaine left, he breathed a bit easier. Gwaine had noticed, but Arthur hadn’t. Arthur dismissed Merlin for the night and he left without a word, not trusting his voice. When he came out of Arthur’s chambers and started heading towards his room, he caught sight of Aggravaine, watching him. He wasn’t scared, but he was shaking at how angry the man was making him. Gwaine followed Merlin’s gaze and saw Aggravaine turn and walk off.

“Merls, what’s going on?” 

“Not here. I, uh, think I need to go outside for a bit, or need a distraction. Which would you like?” Merlin asked, with his eyes closed. 

“Distraction it is. We’re not far from my room, come on.” Gwaine pulled Merlin by his hand to his room and locked the door once they were inside. Merlin pressed himself against Gwaine, against the door. When their lips met, he felt like he was going to melt through the floor. He exhaled and wrapped his magic around them. 

“Sorry. Did Corbett tell you why I needed an escort? Or did he just say you all were setting up a follow Merlin around schedule again?” Merlin asked, eyes still closed. 

“He didn’t say.” Gwaine said pushing away from the door so he could get out of his chainmail and put his sword down.

“Ah. Well, it seems that I’ve upset the King’s Uncle. He, uh, “Merlin was tracing the scar on his face, absently, “he said it would be a shame if those slavers found me again.”

“What?!”

“Yeah, he, uh, he doesn’t approve of the relationship that Arthur and I have. Says servants are meant to be seen and not heard. Anyway, I think he’s plotting something, I just can’t figure out what.” Merlin said flopping down on the bed. 

“Merls, there has to be more to it than that. He feels threatened enough by you to make you feel unsafe. What is it?” Gwaine asked, waiting for a response. Then he remembered something. “Is he the one working with Morgana?” 

“I have no proof.” Merlin said, sounding defeated. “Just, that he was the one who came to Gaius asking who Emrys was.” 

“Merlin. We need to tell the King.” Gwaine was kneeling in front of him now.

“Tell him what? That his Uncle threatened me? Because I have a tendency to ruin any plans Morgana makes? There’s nothing I can say. It’s his Uncle. He won’t want to believe it. And until I have proof, I can’t say anything.” Merlin reached out and put his hand in Gwaine's hair. “Besides, why are we talking about this? I thought you were going to distract me?” Merlin said with a crooked smile. Gwaine laughed at him before laying across his body. “Did you lock the door?” Merlin asked breathless as Gwaine pulled his shirt off. 

“Not sure. Don’t really care.” Gwaine said, running his hands over the various markings that now littered his body. There was a loud knocking at the door. The pair were too focused on each other and determined to ignore whoever it was. The knock became louder and was accompanied by shouting. “GO AWAY!” Gwaine yelled at the door. Merlin started laughing and couldn’t stop. The door swung open and all of the Round Table came bursting in. 

“Stop that! Right now, both of you get dressed, we’re celebrating!!” Leon exclaimed. 

“We’re trying to celebrate but you won’t go away.” Gwaine said exasperated. Shirts were thrown at them, so Gwaine reluctantly got up and pulled Merlin up as well. When they stood up, there were a couple gasps from those who hadn’t seen Merlin since he returned. When he turned to face them, all the marks on his arms, chest, stomach, neck, were all visible. Merlin blushed and pulled the shirt down over his head to keep them from staring. 

“So are we celebrating here, or did you have something else in mind?” Merlin asked, pulling his boots back on. 

“We’re heading down to the tavern. They’ve all missed seeing you Merlin, but they know this isn’t one of your usual visits. So hurry up, let's go!” Lancelot said and pulled the younger man by the arm out the door. Before he got far, he’d grabbed Gwaine’s hand and they were on their way. The tavern erupted in cheers when the group got there. Drinks were passed, toasts were made, and everyone was cheering and making the pair kiss every chance they got. Not that they complained.

******

In the castle, Aggravaine had decided to seek out Geoffrey and find out what he knew about this Druid King. He’d never heard of such a thing, and he knew Morgana hadn’t either. She’d encountered Druids before, but she never mentioned they’d said anything about having a King. 

“Geoffrey, how are you?” Aggravaine asked, coming into the library. 

“Lord Aggravaine, I’m well. What can I do for you?” 

“I wanted to see if you could educate me on this Druid King. You seemed to know a good deal about him.”

“Of course.” Geoffrey rummaged around and pulled out an old looking book. He flipped a few pages and showed it to Aggravaine. “This depicts a ceremony of the Druids marking the man who would be their King. The ceremony is one of deep magic that connects this man to each and every Druid. Once he has risen to his position, he is connected to them through their magic as they are connected to him. They would recognize him on sight, even if they’d never met him before. The legend that goes with it is quite remarkable. Many believe that his time is now and that he has been working alongside King Arthur to bring peace and prosperity.”

“Interesting. Does this King of the Druids have a supposed name?” Aggravaine asked, flipping a few pages of the book.

“He has many names, but the one that appears most frequently is Emrys.” Geoffrey said. Aggravaine nearly dropped the book, and simply looked up to meet the older man’s eyes. 

“The King of the Druids, is Emrys?” 

“Yes. Why, have you come across the name before?” Geoffrey asked. 

“I’ve heard it before. Thank you Geoffrey. This has been enlightening.” Aggravaine said and left. He had to get to Morgana to share this new information.

*******

Merlin was regretting his choices at this point. His head was pounding. He groaned as the sky started to lighten. He reached up and found his hands trapped. He shifted a little trying to get his love to wake up. The other man just groaned as well, not wanting to move. 

“Love I need to get up. It is going to be a very busy day and I need to get Gaius’ hangover cure so that I can make it through the day. If you don’t move I’ll be forced to move you.” He said into Gwaine’s soft deep brown hair.

“You can’t make me move.” Came a reply muffled as it was spoken into Merlin’s chest. Merlin’s eyes flashed and their blankets were pulled off and the curtains were whipped open. Gwaine rolled over and threw his arm over his face. Merlin had planned to stand up, but when he realized that neither of them had any clothes on, he had another idea. He rolled on to his lover and began kissing down his neck. “Merlin, you shouldn’t start anything right now. We’ll both be late.” But Gwaine’s heart wasn’t in it. He was already pulling Merlin tighter against him. 

“We won’t be late. Besides, if you didn’t want this to happen, someone should have made sure at least one of us kept our clothes on last night. So, for now, just shut up and kiss me. We have time enough.” Gwaine couldn’t get over the thrill he felt when Merlin was being demanding. That hungry look in his eyes broke whatever resolve Gwaine thought he might have. 

“Merlin.” Gwaine growled. “You have ruined whatever self control I had.” Merlin giggled at this and gasped as Gwaine rolled them over. Before long they were both out of breath and laying back on the pillows, not wanting to get up. “If the King asks, I’m definitely blaming you for us being late.” Gwaine said. Merlin laughed and got up pulling Gwaine to his feet as well. 

“That was a wonderful way to wake up. I look forward to waking up like that again.” Merlin said and placed a kiss on Gwaines forehead. The pair dressed as quick as they could, Merlin helping Gwaine with his armor and cape before running off to get breakfast for the King. He didn’t end up needing the hangover cure after all. 

When Merlin arrived in Arthur’s chambers, he set the breakfast tray down and shoved open the curtains. He came and pulled the covers off the King to several indignant yells. Merlin grabbed the clothes and threw them over the screen.

“Come on, Sire, you need to get up and get dressed. Princess Mithian’s envoy should be arriving soon and you need to be full and focused.” Merlin said and went and pulled Arthur out of bed and set him on his feet. 

“Merlin, what are you wearing?” Arthur asked.

“Oh, er, I borrowed a shirt from Gwaine. I couldn’t find mine this morning. I’m not actually sure where it is, or how we made it back last night.” Merlin said, scratching his head.

“Back from where?”

“The tavern. The Knights drug us out to celebrate last night. They were rather insistent on it, actually.” 

“Are they all going to be hungover and useless today then? How are you not? If I recall, you got drunk fairly quickly.” Arthur said, walking behind his screen to get dressed. 

“Uh, no reason. Found a different method to, er, clear my head.” Merlin answered, feeling the heat in his face.

“Am I going to have to separate you two until after your wedding?” Arthur asked, playfully.

“Absolutely not. Besides, I doubt you’d be successful in your attempt.” Merlin smirked at him. Arthur rolled his eyes. 

“Try to keep yourselves under control while the envoy is here, yeah? I don’t need you offending the Princess.” Arthur chided as he sat down to eat.

“Offend the princess? I always make it a goal to offend you, princess.” Gwaine said walking in, interrupting the usual morning banter. Arthur had to look away from the way Merlin’s face lit up with adoration when he saw the other man. It caused an ache in him that he had been hiding for over a month now. Seeing his little brother in love was all he ever wanted for him. But he couldn’t ignore his own hurt and anguish. Gwaine reached up and briefly touched Merlin’s chin, before turning to Arthur, a look of apology crossing his eyes. “The scouts have returned. The envoy should be here in less than an hour.”

“Thanks, Gwaine. Gather the Knights and the council and have them ready in front of the castle.” Arthur said looking at his breakfast as if it held the secrets to the universe. 

“Yes, Sire.” Gwaine said, and then turned to leave, but not before stealing a quick kiss from Merlin, who watched him leave, with longing in his eyes. When Merlin turned back around, he found Arthur watching him.

“Sorry, Sire.” Merlin cleared his throat.

“Can I ask you something, Merlin?”

“Obviously. We’ve been over this before, you can ask me anything.”

“How did you forgive him? He left you alone for almost a month. How did you get past it? Didn’t you feel betrayed?” Arthur asked, eyes shining and full of anguish that Merlin didn’t understand.

“It wasn’t easy. I was heartbroken, at first. I thought he gave up on me, on us. But he was hurting just as much as I was. I couldn’t make myself  _ not _ love him, though. I couldn’t turn it off. I don’t know if this makes any sense. But, I’d been alone for so long, you know? Hiding my magic, trying not to love anyone since everyone I seemed to love, died. But it was barely surviving. Finding him, having him come back to me when he was ready, it was like that first breath you take when you come up out of the water. It was like I was drowning and he was the air I needed.” Merlin said, trying to put the feelings into words. 

“You felt all that?” Arthur asked.

“Yeah, yeah I did. I’m not interested in wasting any more time. I need him.” Merlin finished, simply.

“I’ve missed getting your advice, Merlin. You always manage to find just the right words that I need to hear. Thank you.” Merlin raised an eyebrow at the King after he finished.

“Are you feeling ok? Only you never thank me.” Merlin smirked at Arthur, who scoffed and finally smiled. 

“Don’t get too used to it. Besides, you tell anyone, and I’ll just deny it.” Arthur said, abandoning the breakfast. “Come on, let’s head down and prepare to receive the envoy. Oh, and there is a hunt scheduled the day after tomorrow. I know it’s not really your thing, but try not to scare away everything, yeah?” Merlin rolled his eyes and helped Arthur get his cape in place and his crown set on his head nicely. 

Standing on the steps of the castle, Arthur in front, Merlin to his right, and back a step, all the Knights and several of the advisors and council members. Merlin kept looking around trying to figure out where Gwen was. She should be here, standing next to Arthur. Come to think of it, he hadn’t seen her since he’d been back. He decided when he was released today that he would go to her house to see her. He missed his friend and wanted to share his excitement about Gwaine with her. When the envoy appeared, Arthur gave some speech or another, Merlin was having a hard time paying attention as he felt like he was being watched. Arthur led the Princess and her entourage into the castle, while Merlin trailed along at the back of the group. When he glanced around,he noticed Aggravaine’s eyes boring into him with an intensity that made him feel like he was being appraised by the slavers again. He shivered involuntarily. Princess Mithian decided to rest for the remainder of the day due to the length of the journey. Merlin assisted the other servants with getting the luggage to the necessary rooms, and realized he had ended up delivering the Princess’ things. She smiled at him sweetly and thanked him. She was, in truth, very beautiful. She had long silky brown hair and eyes that matched. She may have been petite, but she was confident. When the day was finally over, Merlin went to see if Gaius needed anything before he went to find Gwen. When he found the physician’s chambers empty, he headed out through the citadel. Arriving at Gwen’s little house caused him some alarm. The usually cozy home was dark and empty. What was going on? As he stood in the dark empty house, he felt a hand on his shoulder. He looked pleadingly at Arthur for an answer. 

“Come on, we need to talk.” The King said, and directed Merlin through the city gates and out to the clearing where he would be trained in secret. Oh, no. The only reason he would be brought out here would be if he was going to have a bad reaction. 

“Arthur? What’s going on? Please start talking, because I don’t know how much longer you have before I start to panic.”

“When you fell ill, a lot of things happened. Guinevere has been banished from Camelot. She betrayed me. I found her embracing another that night after the tournament. It broke my heart. But I couldn’t see her killed for what she did, as Aggravaine kept suggesting. I know you were friends with her. But I couldn’t bring myself to tell you yet.” Merlin had lost his composure. He was shocked. Gwen would never purposefully hurt Arthur, let alone choose another over him. He knew he was sending off shocks and felt the wind whip up around him. He backed away from Arthur so as not to accidentally hurt him. 

“That’s...that’s why you asked how I could forgive him? Forgive Gwaine? Because you can’t forgive Gwen?” Merlin asked. Arthur just nodded. He was fighting to keep his face impassive. “Why did no one tell me?!” Merlin shouted. 

“You weren’t well. And then you weren’t here.” Arthur said, as simply as he could, if not a little coldly.

“She’s my best friend, I had a right to know!” The sky had started darkening. 

“What good would it have done!” Arthur was now yelling back. “What good would have come of you being told that not only had Gwaine abandoned you, but that Gwen, your best friend, was banished? None!” Merlin was still backing away from Arthur afraid of what might happen. He was a storm, and he couldn’t calm down. Merlin heard some shouting and saw several of his friends had found them, including Gwaine. 

“I deserved to know the truth!!” Merlin shouted, having lost control of his anger. He quickly put a shield up between himself and his friends, so that they couldn’t reach him. Something was happening that he couldn’t figure out and his magic was reacting. His eyes were blazing, he could feel it. When he looked down at himself he saw the marks on his skin glowing. Merlin had enough time to look up at his friends, his fiance, and for them to see the panic and fear in his face, before lightning struck and he was unconscious. 

*******

Arthur looked around, utterly confused. What just happened? One minute him and Merlin were arguing over what happened with Gwen, and the next? Merlin was gone. Sparks had been coming off of him, his markings had begun to glow, and the clouds had gathered heavily above them. The Knights that showed up were as unable to do anything as Arthur. Merlin had put up some sort of shield that prevented them from getting to him, to try to help calm him down. They were all shouting his name, but Merlin was already caught up in the center of a storm. When Arthur saw the fear in Merlin’s eyes, it nearly broke him. Then the lightning had struck and he was gone. The storm, the shield, it was all gone as if it had never been. There were no traces that lightning had struck, and there was no Merlin. 

“Arthur? What happened?” Lancelot asked him, trying to keep his own fear and anger under control.

“I saw him leave the castle, and followed him to...Guinevere’s. I brought him out here to tell him everything, but he lost control. Did you see it?” Arthur looked in Lancelot’s eyes, searching. 

“Yes. He looked so afraid.” Lancelot commented.

“Not again…” Gwaine mumbled, trying to keep his emotions under control.

“What do you think he did?” Corbett asked, looking up at the sky.

“I’d hazard a guess he somehow managed to become part of the storm he’d unintentionally caused.” Percival said, causing everyone to look at him. “What? He is literally the embodiment of magic. This is probably something he didn’t realize he could do. It’s elemental, instinctual magic.” The group stood in silence for a while longer, not wanting to go back to the castle just yet. There was a rumbling in the distance and they all turned, hoping to see, well, anything. The sky was nearly dark, so the clouds weren’t as discernable as they had been a few moments ago, when a bolt of lightning struck about a mile off. Similarly to what happened when Merlin disappeared, the storm seemed to be gone as quickly as it had appeared. Gwaine had already taken off running. It only took a few more seconds for the others to catch on and take off as well. Gwaine recognized the area as where Merlin had gone after the Caerleon incident. Crouched on the ground, breathing heavily, shirt clinging to his body, shoes missing, was Merlin. 

“Merlin!” Gwaine yelled and ran over to his love. When he got there Merlin tried to stand and collapsed against him, legs giving out.

“Merlin!” The others had caught up in time to see Gwaine catch the younger man as he fell. 

“Ah!” Gwaine exclaimed, shaking his hands.

“What?” Lancelot asked. 

“Nothing, just, his skin is burning up, and he sort of shocked me.” Gwaine answered. The markings on Merlin’s skin were finally starting to fade back to their darker color from the bright glowing gold they had been. His eyes were still blazing like the sun, though. 

“‘M sorry.” Merlin tried saying.

“Shh. Don’t try just yet, love. Catch your breath first, we can wait.” Gwaine said gently brushing the sweat drenched hair from Merlin’s face. 

“Here, he needs to drink something.” Corbett said, handing over a water skin. Gwaine thanked him with a look, and held it up to get Merlin to try to drink some. His breathing was starting to get back to a normal pattern and he attempted to sit up, only to put a hand to his head and fall back to Gwaine’s lap, wincing.

“I’m really, really done with all these surprises when it comes to my magic.” Merlin muttered still holding on to his head. It was so ridiculous that Gwaine just started laughing. Merlin smiled at the sound. Everyone breathed a sigh of relief and chuckled along. “That was, by far, the weirdest feeling, I’ve ever experienced.” 

“Merls, what happened?” Gwaine asked softly.

“Same as usual, I suppose. Arthur will say I was being dramatic, prat. But I do think I had good reason. I haven’t lost my control or had a panic episode since the Druid’s ceremony. There was way too much magic...everywhere. Next time you have something to tell me that you know I won’t react well to, tell me sooner rather than later. Besides, I thought we all promised no more secrets? And here you lot are keeping the fact my best friend is gone a secret from me. I had a right to know.” Merlin said keeping his hands pressed to his head the whole time. “Something feels...off. I need to try something real quick.” Merlin said and pushed away from Gwaine for a second, before he just disappeared. A few paces away, directly behind Arthur actually, he materialized again, swaying on his feet slightly before gripping the King for support. “Ugh. That’s better, but,” he shivered, “maybe I shouldn’t have figured out how to do that.” The Knights were just staring at him. 

“Did you just figure out how to  _ transport _ yourself with your magic?” Lancelot asked him.

“Er. Not on purpose.” Merlin said, still unsteady. His knees had started to give out and he would have fallen if not for the King’s firm grip on him. “I think I need to lie down.” Arthur rolled his eyes. 

“You think? YOU THINK? Merlin, you are lucky that it doesn’t seem anyone else witnessed this!” Arthur was trying to keep from shouting, but he was not being very successful. 

“Don’t take your anger out on me because you made a bad decision. You can be sullen, and disappointed, and mad with yourself all you want, but don’t think you can take it out on me.” Merlin was looking him in the eyes and poked a finger in his chest. “You made the decision, Arthur. Now you have to accept it. I’m going back to the castle and trying to get some sleep before you try pinning all this on me.  _ You _ chose this, Arthur. Not me, not her, you.” Merlin had felt himself getting upset and decided to see if he could transport himself again. He met Gwaine’s eyes for a brief moment, and then he was gone. 

“He really does have a flair for the dramatics.” Leon said quietly. “Let’s head back, Sire. He’ll be fine by tomorrow.” 

“Yeah. Tomorrow.” Arthur muttered still looking at the place Merlin had just been standing. Lancelot helped Gwaine up to his feet, as he hadn’t moved since Merlin moved from his lap. 

“Make sure he gets something to eat. That had to use up a lot of energy.” Lancelot said quietly. 

“Hmm.” Gwaine was unsure he could speak.

“Maybe make sure he takes a bath as well. Don’t need him around all these fussy nobles tomorrow smelling awful.” he added, giving him a playful shove. Gwaine looked at him with a glint in his eye.

“Mm. You’re right, I better go make sure he’s taken care of. See you lot tomorrow.” Gwaine hollered as he ran back to the castle and disappeared from view. 

“He’s talking like him now. Do you really think that was a good idea?” Corbett asked, leaning over to Lancelot.

“Probably not. But I know he’ll take care of him. If anyone can reach him and get him to unwind and get some proper rest, it’s going to be Gwaine.” Lancelot answered simply.

Before Gwaine got to his room, he asked a few servants to bring hot water to his room for a bath. When he got to the room, he got his bath out, set the screen up and then locked the door once he had all the water in it. Merlin was passed out in the middle of the bed. Gwaine carefully stripped Merlin’s clothes off and helped him settle in the bath. There was a soft knock at the door, and Gwaine opened it and accepted the food that Diana had brought up. She gave him a hug before leaving. He set the tray down at the table after locking the door again. He then went and knelt by the bath and began washing Merlin. His love just sat there and stared unseeing at the wall. Gwaine carefully scrubbed Merlin’s hair and rinsed him off. He helped him up and dried him off before sitting him at the table. Of course he left him in just a towel. Merlin was still quiet and still just staring unseeing at the walls. Gwaine managed to get some soup in him. 

“Merlin.” Gwaine said, tentatively stroking a finger down his jaw. Finally Merlin looked up and looked in his eyes.

“Love.” Merlin smiled softly. “He asked me how I could forgive you. This morning. I didn’t know why. I didn’t think it was as big of a deal as he made it seem. I didn’t understand.”

“It wasn’t your fault. If you’d thought that the dark magic you sensed was because someone was going after Gwen, you would have done something. You would have, I believe that. You’re so used to people coming after Arthur, it hadn’t occurred to you that someone wouldn’t want Gwen on the throne. I saw her, you know? When you came to me that night? She was working in the inn I stayed at and staying with a family nearby. She misses you. I told her you’d been sick and that once you were back by Arthur’s side, you’d make him see sense.” Gwaine said, cupping Merlin’s cheek while he spoke. 

“And all I’ve done is shout at him.” Merlin grunted, leaning in to Gwaine’s touch.

“Better than anything anyone here has done. Everyone has just avoided the topic afraid of being banished because they accidentally said her name. Well, not Aggravaine. He’s been encouraging Arthur that he should be seeking a marriage to form an alliance for the kingdom. Princess Mithian’s name came up at least once. Arthur of course is refusing any of these talks. Said it’s too soon, and he’s not interested.”

“Do you think I went too far? Shouting at him like that?”

“Oh, Merls. I think that you are the only one who can make him see sense.” Merlin smiled at him. 

“You know he was asking this morning when we planned on getting married. Tried saying we were supposed to seek his permission first.” 

“Technically that’s true. But then I’m not one to follow the rules.” 

“Nor am I. Do you think we’re moving too fast? Do you think a few weeks would be ok? Only I told him I was tired of waiting.” Merlin looked at Gwaine hesitantly, unsure of what his feelings would be. If they would match his own. 

“Merlin, I’d marry you tomorrow if we could get away with it.” Gwaine said, grabbing Merlin’s hand. 

“Do you mean that?”

“Absolutely.”

“Maybe we can sneak away a few hours tomorrow night or something then?” Merlin said grinning wickedly. 

“Tomorrow can’t come soon enough.” Gwaine said leaning in for a kiss. Merlin grabbed a paper and quickly jotted a note down, set it in his hand and it was gone. 

“Just sending word ahead for Iseldir to expect us. Now, I don’t suppose you left me in just a towel on accident, good Knight.” 

“Just trying to keep you cool and comfortable love. Plus the view is breathtaking.” Gwaine said, kissing Merlin’s head. 

“Well I think I’ll just go to bed then. I could use some sleep.” Merlin had stood up and headed for the bed dropping his towel when he got to the bed, knowing what he was doing. Before Melin had pulled the blankets up, Gwaine had let out an involuntary sound and practically sprinted the short distance to the bed and was pressed close against Merlin, both drinking in the affection. Passionate didn’t compare to how they were feeling. Merlin had forgiven Gwaine for leaving him to heal during those weeks. Gwaine hadn’t realized how much he’d been afraid that Merlin wouldn’t forgive him. That worry was gone, replaced by so many emotions that Gwaine couldn’t process them all. He made it his goal to show Merlin just how much he appreciated and loved him. 

When morning came, Arthur was surprised that he was woken up in the usual manner. Merlin had come in and thrown open the curtains revealing a bright sunny day, and saying some silly good morning phrase as usual. Arthur hadn’t argued for more sleep, and just got up. He dressed and went and sat at the table to eat. When he felt a hand on his shoulder he finally looked up at Merlin.

“Arthur?”

“Hmm? Sorry, were you saying something?”

“I was just apologizing. For shouting at you yesterday. It wasn’t fair of me to react like I did.”

“No, Merlin. Don’t apologize. Never. You were right, about everything. I just didn’t want to hear it. If you can forgive Gwaine, surely in time, I can forgive Gwen as well. Not yet, though. I’m sorry Merlin.” Arthur said and saw the bemused smug look Merlin was giving him. He promptly rolled his eyes. “No need to get cocky about it.” Arthur continued eating and eyed Merlin suspiciously. “Princess Mithian has decided to join us on the hunt tomorrow. See to it that she has everything she needs.”

“Naturally. There’s a feast tonight, yes? To welcome the envoy?”

“Yes.” Arthur glanced at Merlin, the earlier suspicion returning. 

“Hmm. I was wondering if I could have the night off?” Merlin asked not meeting Arthur’s gaze.

“And why would that be?” 

“No reason. Just wanting to spend some time with Gaius. I haven’t been able to help him or see him much other than briefly the day I got back.” Merlin wasn’t entirely lying. He’d just take Gaius with him when he and Gwaine sneack out to see the Druids tonight. 

“I need you there to begin, but I can dismiss you early, that’s all I can offer.” Arthur said taking a drink to hide a smirk, since he thought he’d worked out what was really going to happen. 

“It’s better than nothing, I suppose. Anything special you need done today, or just continue with preparations for the feast tonight and the hunt tomorrow?” Merlin asked, having already cleaned Arthur’s room during their conversation. Merlin was amused that Arthur hadn’t noticed the bed making itself nor the clothes jumping in the basket. 

“No, that’s all. Go get on with whatever you’re meant to be doing. Oh, and if you see Lancelot or Corbett, I need to speak with them.” Arthur said. Merlin nodded and grabbed the clothes before heading out. 

He went to see Gaius to see what he thought of his and Gwaine’s sudden plans. Gaius was thrilled, which surprised Merlin. Merlin told Gaius to meet them at the stables when he was dismissed from the feast. After his discussion with Gaius, Merlin had made his way to Princess Mithian’s rooms to see if there was anything she would need for the hunt the following day. He was nearly to the rooms, when he was pulled in to an alcove and his lover was kissing him. 

“Missing me already?” Merlin asked, unable to keep his grin under control. 

“Always.” Gwaine said, kissing him again, taking his time. “Tonight?” 

“Tonight.” Merlin responded and pulled Gwaine in one last time for a long slow kiss, and jumped when he heard a small exclamation from the corridor. The pair separated, just noticing Princess Mithian, and Gwaine went on about his duties. Merlin went to apologize to the Princess. “I’m sorry, my lady. I hope we didn’t distress you too much.” Merlin said, sincerely.

“It’s quite alright.” She said, fanning her face slightly. “I was told you would be coming by, I just hadn’t expected you to have company.” It was Merlin’s turn to blush.

“It wasn’t my intent. Since we became betrothed he keeps finding reasons to interject in my daily tasks.” 

“How wonderful! Come, walk with me and tell me of your love. Then we can move on to other courtly matters.” Princess Mithian came to stand beside Merlin and looped her arm in his. He smiled at the gesture.

“The gardens are lovely today, perhaps I can grab a small lunch from the kitchen for a picnic?” 

“That would be lovely. Please, when we get to the gardens, call me Mithian.”

“Of course, my lady.” They walked and arrived at the kitchens soon enough, where Merlin grabbed a small basket for a picnic. When they arrived at the gardens, Merlin set out a blanket on the ground and placed the food out. 

“So, Merlin, how long have you and that dashing Knight been betrothed?” She asked.

“Not long, actually. Not even a week. About a month ago I became ill, sort of suddenly and I wasn’t getting better, so the King sent me away to heal for a few weeks. It was not easy for either of us. I thought he didn’t want to see me, to be with me anymore. But turns out it was the opposite. He asked me to marry him the night I came back to Camelot.” Merlin’s face flooded with heat remembering the night.

“The King sent you away? That’s unusual. You are his servant, but yet he cares deeply for your well-being.” She said it as a statement, but a hint of a question in it.

“Arthur is more my brother, than my master. We’ve been through a lot together. He’s helped me as much as I’ve helped him. He’s a good man, just needs a little nudge now and again.”

“How did you meet your love if you’re always with the King? I know that several of the Knights were common born men, it’s no secret. But how did you find time to meet someone?”

“I’ve known Gwaine for a good while now. He was one of my best friends before we got involved romantically. Surely you’ve had such affections before?” Merlin asked hoping to get the Princess to share and not have the whole conversation be him telling how wonderful he thought Gwaine was. 

“Being a Princess I haven’t had the luxury to meet or spend time with anyone to garner such affections. I always imagined I’d end up marrying to further an alliance. King Arthur has changed many people's perception of what makes a good ruler. I was worried that there would be talks of a marriage while I was here, honestly. Hopefully the only marriage that gets talked about is yours while I’m here though.” She chuckled, and he did too. They spoke for another hour about the troubles of being at court, the upcoming feast, and just enjoyed the time out of all the prying eyes. When they went back inside, Merlin stopped outside the Princess’ rooms and kissed her hand, bidding her a good afternoon and hoping to see her at the feast. The feast was fast approaching so Merlin made his way to Arthur’s room to help him get ready. When he got there, he had heard voices inside, and the door was locked. He knocked and waited while the conversation inside quieted, and Arthur opened the door. Merlin raised an eyebrow at him.

“Merlin. About time you showed up.” Arthur said and stood aside,letting him in the room. His surprise didn’t go away when he got in the room and found Lancelot, Corbett, and Percival sitting at the table. He tried to ignore their knowing looks and went about setting out the King’s finery for the evening. 

“Merlin, anything about the feast you're looking forward to?” Lancelot asked. 

“Why would I look forward to it? More work for me making sure your cups don’t run dry while blending in with the walls?” He said out of habit.

“Hmm. What about Princess Mithian? How does she feel?” Arthur asked.

“Er, fine I guess. Why?”

“Oh, nothing. I was informed that a certain dark-haired servant and the Princess enjoyed a picnic in the gardens.”

“Yeah, she may have, er, caught me being accosted in an alcove and to make up for it asked me to walk with her.” Merlin answered, and could feel Arthur’s glare from across the room. “Not my fault! I thought you would be keeping everyone busy today and that it wouldn’t be an issue!” Merlin said backing away and raising his arms in defense of the King who was advancing on him. 

“So it’s my fault, is it?” Arthur asked, a challenge in his eyes. 

“That’s not what I said.” Merlin placated. The Knights were watching the exchange, and trying their hardest to keep straight faces. “I think you should get changed for the feast so that you don’t keep said Princess waiting, though.” Merlin changed the subject. Arthur rolled his eyes, he knew Merlin was right, and so did Merlin.

“You know what your orders are. I’ll see you at the feast.” Arthur said dismissing the gathered Knights, while Merlin simply raised a questioning eyebrow at them. Corbett winked at him and then was off.

“You all get stranger everyday.” Merlin said, helping Arthur change for the evening.

“You’re one to talk.” Arthur mumbled. Once he was ready, they made the trek to the banquet hall in companionable silence. The fanfare sounded as the King entered, Merlin silent and non-existent behind him. There were speeches, and toasts, and so much food. Merlin made his way through the crowd, refilling cups as necessary. The Princess had called him over a few times and he would comment on something causing her laughter to ring through the room. More than a few nobles had noticed this and would give questioning glances to the King at this familiarity. Arthur just smiled. Merlin had a way with people always making them feel at ease. When he had gone back to a table to get a new pitcher, Gwaine had snuck over for a quick hello. He reached up and fondly traced Merlin’s jawline before going back to join the Knights. Arthur watched the interaction and felt the ache in his chest return. Mithian placed a hand on Arthur’s arm, drawing his attention. 

“Are you well, my lord?” She asked, noticing the hurt in his eyes.

“Quite. Just a painful memory. How are you? Merlin told me about what happened earlier. Seems I didn’t have enough work for my Knights if one was able to wander off.” Mithian laughed.

“They’re in love, Sire. There isn’t much that can be done to keep them apart, I imagine. I only wish to one day find that same affection for myself.” Mithian added, watching Merlin smiling towards Gwaine.

“I’m sure you will.” Arthur assured her. After another hour, Arthur dismissed Merlin for the night. He knew what was going on, but he didn’t want to intrude. If Merlin knew something dangerous was coming, then Arthur wanted him to have as many love filled days as he could manage. Even if it meant keeping it a secret for now. 

Merlin didn’t search around, but simply headed straight to his lover’s room to retrieve his leather circlet that was in the wardrobe. He knew that if he showed up without it, the Druids would insist on the gold and silver one. Merlin then made his way to the stables where he met with Gaius, and after a short wait, Gwaine. The trio rode out of the citadel, hoping no one had seen them. Unbeknownst to them, Arthur had set Corbett, Lancelot, and Percival to shadow them. When they arrived at the Druid encampment, Iseldir met them and led Gwaine and Merlin in to separate tents to get prepared. Gaius was led elsewhere in the camp.

“I see you got my letter.” Merlin said as Iseldir came in while another Druid, Mara, was preparing him. 

“I did. you’ll have to share how you did that sometime. It would come in handy.”

“As soon as I figure out how to do it, I promise I’ll share.” Merlin chuckled. He was wearing midnight blue trousers and a vest of the same color with golden symbols stitched in. They matched those on his body. Merlin was pulling out the leather circlet, but Iseldir stopped him. 

“For this ceremony, we insist you wear the one forged for you.” And he pulled out a case that contained the gold and silver band. When he placed it on Merlin’s head, the symbols on his vest and his body all flashed gold, and a warm breeze blew through the camp. “It’s time.” Isedir smiled and led Merlin, followed by Mara, to a clearing that had been set up with streamers and banners and had lights hanging up giving the area an ethereal feel. He looked up to see Gwaine had been dressed similarly to him. Gwaine had forest green trousers and a matching vest, though his did not have any symbols on it. Merlin stared, drinking in the sight of his beloved. Merrik had walked Gwaine over and the lovers now stood in the center of the clearing surrounded by the Druids. They grabbed each other's hands as Iseldir instructed. It was midnight now and the full moon was shining down on them. If anyone asked Merlin later, or even Gwaine what it was that Iseldir told them, they wouldn’t be able to say. Merlin had promised himself to Gwaine and Gwaine had promised himself to Merlin. Part of the ceremony, a small container of paint was brought out and Merlin painted a symbol over Gwaine's heart. It was a twisting complicated knot, symbolized tying themselves together. When he was done, Gwaine did the same. He carefully drew over the scar that had been placed there by Balin. Their hands were tied together by a vine that bloomed once it was placed. Merlin let out a small gasp as he felt his magic stirring. Iseldir pronounced that they were joined in the language of the Old Religion and there was a resounding chorus of cheers as Gwaine kissed Merlin fiercely in front of the gathered crowd, and Merlin’s magic burst out of him in a shower of golden sparks. Once he was back in control again, he kissed back with abandon. When they parted, Merlin noticed that the symbol of knots on Gwaine’s chest was glowing in time with his heartbeat. He could feel him through the one one his own chest. Merlin placed his hand on the symbol, Gwaine doing the same, and they couldn’t help the smiles on their faces and happiness that they felt. Merlin stepped away for a second and muttered some words and shot golden sparks up in the night sky. They celebrated until it was a few hours from dawn. The group made their way back to their horses and rode back to Camelot. When they got back, the sky was lightening already, but the newly married pair were far from tired. Gaius hugged them both congratulating them before going to get a few hours of sleep before he was needed. Merlin and Gwaine ran all the way back to the Knights’ room. They were still dressed in their marriage clothes, not having changed before coming back. They had stopped several times along the way, kissing in the corridor and running off when a servant appeared. They were so caught up in each other they hadn’t noticed they were followed by at least three snickering Knights and spotted by Aggravaine at least one.

Staying locked in the room all day was sorely tempting. They hadn’t slept at all, not wanting to waste a single minute. All too soon the sun was up and they were rushing to get dressed and get ready for the hunt Arthur had planned. Merlin was racing down the corridors, Gwaine right beside him, as they headed for the stables. They were distracted yet again by each other and missed the crowd of Knights and the King who were waiting while they were kissing instead of tacking horses. A cough, and a lot of laughter, broke them apart. Merlin, burning a bright red to rival Arthur’s cape, led the horses out to the courtyard accompanied by whistles, hair ruffling, and even, briefly, being picked up and thrown over Percival’s shoulder which caused more laughter. Merlin was thoroughly embarrassed and was certain at this point his face would be permanently red. Princess Mithian came and rode next to him while they headed out of the citadel. She looked at him and smiled.

“There’s something different about you today, Merlin.” She said.

“Hmm? I’m not sure what you mean?” He responded looking straight ahead at Arthur’s back. Arthur had looked over his shoulder and raised an eyebrow challenging him. Merlin tilted his head. Surely Arthur didn’t know, did he? 

“Something is different about you. You were happy yesterday, but today, it’s almost like you are radiating happiness. It’s quite infectious.” She said smiling brightly. Merlin smiled back at her and they rode on the rest of the way in silence. When they got to the woods, the hunt began in earnest. Merlin and several others were handed beaters and sent off to scare the game out. Merlin was obviously not trying to actually find any animals, but he felt something strange then. Magic. Some sort of concealing charm was at work. How had he known that? He knew what magic was in use. He looked up suddenly alert, searching the woods, when he noticed a lone deer. He watched as it made its way slowly past, and Merlin saw a reflection in a small puddle on the ground. But the reflection was Gwen, not a deer. Gwen. She had been enchanted! His heart rate quickened when he realized what was going to happen. They were on a hunt, and Gwen was enchanted to be a deer! He was finding it hard to breathe. Gwaine was beside him in an instant, clutching his chest where their mark was. 

“What?” he asked.

“Gwen. That deer, it’s not a deer, it’s Gwen.” Merlin whispered.

“Then it looks like we need to stop a hunt.” Gwaine said, rushing off. Merlin ran off in the direction of the deer. When he got there he was in time to stop one arrow from finding its mark, but he hadn’t seen the second one. The deer had gotten away, but Merlin knew she was hit. While he followed Arthur, who followed the trail, he was trying to keep his anxiety under control. Arthur knelt down having spotted something on the ground. Merlin was at his shoulder in an instant, sensing his distress. Arthur held up the ring he had given to Gwen and met Merlin’s eyes. Merlin saw so many emotions run unchecked through him that he couldn’t move. Arthur looked so broken at just having found this little thing. Merlin tried to convey his understanding through a look.  _ Go. I’ll find her and make sure she’s safe _ . Merlin told him through his mind. Arthur stood up and turned to head back. 

“I’ll leave a guard so you aren’t entirely unprotected. See me as soon as you get back.” Merlin nodded to him and watched as they all mounted and rode off. Except Lancelot. Merlin tried to grin at his friend but found himself unable. He looked out at the woods and sent his magic searching for the enchantment he had felt earlier. He felt it and started walking in the direction he sensed. Lancelot kept close to his side and said nothing focusing on keeping Merlin from falling since he was walking with his eyes closed.

“Merlin.” Lancelot said softly. Merlin opened his eyes now and saw Gwen lying on the ground in strange clothes and an arrow in her leg. She was shivering and sweating. Merlin knelt down next to her and began assessing her for any other injuries. Lancelot started a fire while Merlin was in his physician mode. Merlin had Lancelot pull the arrow out and he quickly covered it with his neckerchief as a makeshift bandage. Lancelot sat across from them watching. Merlin placed a hand on her injury and another on her shoulder and muttered a healing spell he had learned from the Druids. He could feel her injury healing and the infection receding. He pulled the cape tighter around her shoulders. He sat down placing her head in his lap finally looking up to find Lancelot watching him carefully.

“She’ll be alright.” Merlin said, reassuring his friend. 

“You’re a good physician, Merlin. Sometimes I forget that.” Merlin just grinned and looked in the fire. 

“I should hope so. I’ve been studying for over five years now. She should wake in a few hours. Though I’m not sure it’ll be good news.” Merlin said voicing his concern for her appearance finally. 

“Your funny feeling, eh?”

“Something like that.” They sat for a while just listening to the sounds of nature around them. A few creatures, squirrels and birds and even a unicorn had come and chattered around Merlin. The unicorn had come over and knelt to him and then wandered off, leaving a very confused Merlin behind, while Lancelot laughed at his expression. Gwen started to stir and when she woke up she was very surprised. 

“Merlin?!” She exclaimed and sat up hugging him tightly. 

“Gwen!” 

“What are you doing here?” She asked, and noticed Lancelot, giving him a small smile. 

“You were injured. What can you remember?” Merlin asked.

“The village I was staying in was attacked by Southrons. The man, Helios, was in charge and ordered me taken prisoner instead of killed. Merlin, he’s working with Morgana! I saw her confide in Helios that her source in Camelot had provided her with the plans to the siege tunnels. Merlin, it’s Aggravaine. He’s working with Morgana.” Merlin sighed. “You knew?!” she guessed. 

“I had my suspicions, but I’ve had no proof. I told Arthur my suspicions once and it nearly cost me the same sentence as you. I couldn’t leave him unprotected.” Merlin said holding on to her hand. “It doesn’t matter now, though. You can come back with us and tell all this to Arthur yourself.” Gwen was shaking her head.

“I can’t. I can’t come back. I betrayed him and I can’t bear to see him yet. You must take the news to him.” She said determinedly.

“Gwen, surely you can come back for a day to rest before you move on?” Lancelot suggested.

“No, I can’t. Please you must tell him. You must protect him.” She said squeezing Merlin’s hand. The men both nodded at her. She looked down then, having felt the ring on Merlin’s hand. “Merlin!” She exclaimed. He smiled at her, feeling his face start to burn.

“There’s so much I want to talk with you about. So much has happened, I don’t even know where to begin.” He said. 

“I’m so glad for you! You deserve to be happy, Merlin. He better take care of you or I will pummel him.” She said fiercely. 

“He does. And I am happy. I’d be happier if I had my best friend around to talk to though. Arthur is alright, but there are some things that he doesn’t need to be privy to.” Merlin said laughing slightly. 

“So, have you made any plans as to when you will marry?” She asked.

“After Arthur has his feast for the Druids in about two weeks. Arthur insisted, actually. I hope you can be there.” Merlin said sitting there, still holding her hand as she leaned against him. Lancelot raised his eyebrows at him. “What?”

“Merlin, you know that you’ve been being followed for a few days now right? Since Aggravaine threatened you? So you know that you were also followed last night?” Merlin turned bright red now. 

“So, you know?” 

“I do. So does Corbett and Percival. Arthur had his suspicions so naturally we reported to him once you two were securely locked away in Gwaine’s room. He’s pretty happy that he won the bet. I honestly thought it would take another year.” 

“I’m sorry for not letting anyone else in on it. It’s just...it feels like something is coming, and I didn’t want to wait.”

“Merlin, is there something you aren’t telling me?” Gwen asked, eyes bright.

“Arthur held a feast last night for the envoy from Nemeth and I snuck away with Gaius and Gwaine, and we sort of got married last night.” Merlin said.

“Merlin!!” She hugged him then, tears falling freely.

“I wish we could have been a part of it, but don’t worry, Arthur will certainly make sure that it is a grand affair.” Lancelot added. 

“I’m sorry we didn’t tell you, we just decided sort of last minute.” Merlin said. 

“Obviously we’re happy for you. So we’re going to have to celebrate soon.” Lancelot said reaching over and ruffling his hair. They sat there for a little while longer, letting Gwen rest and get warm by the fire. 

“Gwen, you should go to my mother. She’ll help you. And when the time is right, I’ll come get you.” Merlin told her as he got her settled on his horse. 

“I’ll do that Merlin. Please, take care of our King. He’s going to need you. All of you. This betrayal will not be easy on him.” She said and then rode off towards Ealdor along with the setting sun. Merlin rode behind Lancelot as they returned to Camelot. A stable boy came out and collected the horse while the men walked in the castle. They went straight to Arthur’s chambers and found him staring out the window. 

“Sire.” Lancelot said as they entered. 

“Is she alright?” Arthur asked.

“She is. She’s going somewhere safe. Arthur, she had troubling news.” Merlin said, trying to gain his King’s attention.

“Merlin, why don’t you go check on Princess Mithian. Her envoy is leaving tomorrow, help make sure she has everything she needs.” Arthur said, still not looking at him. 

“Arthur…”

“You’re dismissed.” Merlin looked at Lancelot for some kind of help,but the other man just shook his head. Feeling defeated, Merlin left, hoping that maybe Arthur would believe Lancelot at least. When he got to the Princess’s rooms, she assured him that all was well and she looked forward to coming back for his wedding. He made it back to Gwaine’s room and before he could knock, the door swung open and he was pulled roughly inside and engulfed in a hug. 

“Love, I can’t breathe.” Merlin gasped. Gwaine quickly stepped back, grabbing Merlin’s nimble fingers and lacing them with his. 

“Sorry. Just needed that. Did you feel it? Earlier?” Gwaine asked.

“Yeah, I felt it. We are connected now.” Merlin said taking his hand out of Gwaine’s and placing it over his heart. Gwaine did the same to Merlin. They stood there for a few moments, just breathing each others scent in and feeling the others heartbeat. Gwaine reached behind him and locked the door with the hand not on Merlin’s chest. Merlin felt wild all of a sudden and backed Gwaine up to the table in the room, not breaking contact. He pushed his lover on the table and then put his hand in Gwaine’s long hair and pressed their lips together. He felt a jolt of energy rush through him as their lips met. They kissed like they would never get the chance again. Like they were drowning, and the other was their air. Hands moved to cup cheeks, then pulled through hair, then down the back, pulling hips closer together. 

“Merlin.” Gwaine gasped. 

“Yes?” Merlin couldn’t take his eyes away from the lips he wanted so desperately to kiss again. 

“Something is bothering you. We can talk now, or we can talk later. It’s your choice.” Gwaine was having just as much trouble as Merlin was. He kept running his hands over Merlin’s back, pulling him in as close as he could.

“Later, please. I promise.” Merlin said and pulled his shirt off before reaching over and pulling Gwaine’s off as well. They backed over to the bed, falling in and tugging off the remaining clothing and tossing it across the room. 

When the night had fully fallen, and the lovers lay in bed, Merlin draped over Gwaine’s chest, they spoke in hushed whispers. Almost as if saying their fears too loud would cause them to happen sooner than they were ready for. 

“Aggravaine has given the siege tunnel plans to Morgana. It’s only a matter of time before she attacks.” Merlin murmured.

“We’ll be ready. We know now, so we can prepare. We must keep the King safe.” Gwaine soothed.

“I know. I wish we could’ve had more time together.” Merlin said, not knowing why.

“What do you mean? We’ve got loads of time. The rest of our lives. I intend to make our lives as long as possible.”Gwaine was rubbing circles in Merlin’s back. “Merls, what’s going on?” Merlin let out a heavy sigh.

“It’s just a feeling, love. I want to enjoy every last moment with you. But I fear we do not have long. Morgana’s power is growing. I can feel the wrongness of it seeping through the world. It won’t be long before she figures out who I am, if she hasn’t already. I’m the only one who can stop her.” Merlin said, pushing himself up on his elbows. He knew that if it came down to him and Morgana, he could beat her, but it would cost him.

“We’ll worry about that when it comes. Now, husband, you need to rest. We both do. Otherwise we’ll do more harm than good.” He kissed Merlin on his nose and pulled him back to his chest where. Merlin reached up curling his fingers in Gwaine’s hair and drifted off to sleep. They stayed there, locked in the room for an entire day, ignoring the knocks and shouting from the corridor. Merlin knew if they were that concerned they would get the keys from Arthur. Gwaine encouraged Merlin to magic them food from the kitchen so they didn’t have to get any servants or open the door and deal with the taunting from the other Knights. 


	21. The Sword in the Stone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The final chapter brings Merlin and Arthur to yet another invasion. Knowing things won't end well, Merlin tries to pretend otherwise.

When they woke the next morning, they knew they couldn't neglect their duties any longer. The next week was meant to be preparations for the celebration with the Druids. Standing outside Gwaine’s room, Merlin couldn’t bring himself to move away from his husband. But he had to. They both had their duties. Merlin went to the King finally, having picked up his breakfast, and entered to find Arthur asleep on his desk. It looked like he had been working, but what amused Merlin, was that he’d fallen asleep and his head had landed in his dinner remnants. He set the breakfast tray down loudly, and Arthur’s head shot up. 

“Morning.” Merlin said, with a small grin, and went to open the curtains the rest of the way. He poured some water in a small basin so he could help wash Arthur’s now matted hair. He dipped a cloth in the water and started to rub at his temple. Arthur didn’t move, just sat still while Merlin ministered to him. Arthur could pick up that something was bothering Merlin, but he knew the younger man would share when he was ready. The day seemed to drag on, both men still subdued. And it continued this way for a week. The week of the festivities, their attitudes and demeaners hadn’t improved. It was a few days from when the Druids were set to arrive that there was a small banquet for the Knights, council members, and various nobles. It wasn’t anything fancy, but it was the last time Arthur had planned to have Merlin serving him. 

Arthur had taken the news of Aggravaine’s treachery badly. He still hoped that the preparations he’d put in place would be enough to allow them to fight back. Arthur had taken care of these with Leon and had a separate plan in place with Lancelot and Corbett to keep Merlin from Morgana when the time came. Merlin had refilled his cup and stayed nearby, so Arthur had registered the instant that Merlin gasped and rocked back slightly on his feet, and dropped the pitcher. They locked eyes briefly as Arthur came to stand in front of him.  _ Morgana is here, in the citadel _ . Merlin spoke through his mind, though he hadn’t just directed it at Arthur, he knew the Knights had heard as well as they were all instantly on their feet. He only hoped he kept it to the people that were aware of his abilities, but he wasn’t sure since his magic had rushed through him so suddenly. The warning bells sounded and a squire ran in announcing that the lower town was on fire, with an army making its way toward the castle. Arthur sent his Knights out to meet the invading force and had Merlin escort the remaining nobles to safety. It was a short battle though. The Knights fought as best they could, but they were quickly overrun. Lancelot, Corbett, and Eoin were doing what they could to keep the invaders out of the castle, but they were soon pushed back. When they knew they would be captured, they sent Corbett to find and protect Merlin. Gwaine, Percival, and Elyan were protecting the makeshift hospital as well as they could. 

Merlin had run out to the battling forces to ensure Arthur’s safety. He was able to pull Arthur behind a pillar as the enemy forces approached the castle, but he’d already been injured. Leading the warriors was a man Merlin guessed to be Helios, Morgana of course, and Aggravaine. Though Arthur had been aware of his treachery, it didn’t make the sight any easier to bear. Merlin pulled Arthur’s arm over his shoulders and put his own around the King’s waist and drug him to Gaius. Corbett had found them on the way and helped carry the King’s weight. Arthur had a few broken ribs and was barely able to stand. Merlin wasn’t much better. He was swaying on his feet due to Morgana’s proximity and the depth of her dark magic. Gwaine was there trying to keep Merlin steady as much as he could. Gaius wrapped Arthur’s ribs but the King was refusing to flee. 

“You need to get the King to safety.” Gaius told Merlin, who was only upright thanks to Gwaine. 

“He won’t go willingly. There must be something you can give him? A potion or something?” Merlin asked.

“There’s nothing I can do. Everything I would need is on the other side of the castle. But there may be something you can do.” Gaius told him. 

“Are you suggesting magic?” Merlin asked, just wanting clarification. Gaius nodded. Merlin thought about this, deliberating and then walked over behind Arthur. Gaius distracted Arthur by saying he was going to do something and as soon as he pushed on the King’s ribs, Merlin muttered a spell and took away his free will, making him agreeable. 

“We must go now, Sire.” Merlin tried.

“Of course.” Arthur said standing, looking strangely blank. Percival and Elyan were nearby and at Merlin’s direction, guided the King out of the back tunnels.

“Gaius, get your things, we need to go.” Merlin told him.

“I’ll only slow you down. You must protect the King.” Gaius told him. 

“I’m not leaving you.” Merlin tried to argue. 

“You must.” Gaius responded. The door that had been barricaded would not last much longer. 

“Merlin, go. I’ll protect him as long as I can.” Gwaine told him. Merlin was shocked. He stared at him. His husband. His love. 

“No. No I can’t lose you!” Merlin was nearly shouting. He pulled Gwaine close and kissed him, terrified that it would be his last chance. 

“Love, you need to go. I can make sure that Gaius survives. I can’t do that if I’m worried about you. Please. Go. I will be with you again soon.” Gwaine and Merlin stood there, foreheads touching, knowing this may be it. Corbett had a hand on Merlin’s shoulder ready to pull him out the door to follow the King.

“I love you. I will see you again.” Merlin said with determination, a tear escaping his closed eyes.

“And I love you. Now go. Protect our King.” Gwaine squeezed his neck close one last time and then shoved him to the door and blocked it once he was out of sight. Gaius tried to comfort the Knight once they were alone, but the door was blasted open and Morgana stood before them soon enough. Seeing the two men alone in the room, she had them thrown in the dungeons with the others while she rode out to search for Arthur. 

Merlin was having trouble focusing. He knew Gwaine was alive, he knew he would feel if anything had happened to him. But it was still one of the most difficult things he ever did. He was having trouble breathing and focusing. He felt his head swimming. He caught up to Percival and Elyan who were still hauling the King. They stopped for a minute to catch their breath. Percival came over and placed a hand on Merlin’s shoulder. 

“Merlin. He’ll be fine.” Percival said. 

“Please don’t. I’m not ready to think about it yet. I can’t. I...I can’t lose him.” Merlin was gasping, and it took everything he had not to collapse to his knees. Corbett was at his side doing what he could to keep him upright. Just then Merlin felt a jolt of fear. He stood up straight looking behind them. “Run!” He yelled. As soon as he did, the group took off. The Knights had learned not to question Merlin in these instances. They hadn’t made it far when they were wall thrown forward off their feet. Elyan had disappeared somewhere. Percival and Merlin had grabbed Arthur and took off. They arrived at a chasm, and Percival stopped and shook hands with Merlin and Corbett, telling them to protect Arthur. Then it was just Merlin, Arthur, and Corbett. They kept going until they were near the edge of Camelot’s borders and found a small abandoned hut. Merlin grabbed some spare clothes and told Arthur to change into something less conspicuous. Since he had no free will, it was almost like dealing with a toddler. Whatever Merlin said, Arthur did. Corbett stood watch nearby.

“Are you done yet?” Merlin asked Arthur. He had given him some clothes and told him to change. Which was odd because Merlin usually assisted Arthur in these instances. There was too much on his mind to be able to think straight enough to be able to assist the prat. 

“Almost. Some of these things are rather tight, Merlin.” Arthur said, groaning while struggling into some of the clothes. 

“Beggars can’t be choosers.” Merlin said simply.

“No, you’re right. I should learn to think before I speak.” Arthur said.

“That would be a nice start.” Merlin said, and then looked up as Arthur came around from behind the barrier he had ducked behind. When Merlin saw Arthur, it took a lot for him not to laugh out loud. Arthur had trousers on that were much too short as they barely fell below his knees, and the shirt stopped above his belly button, not to mention the vest that topped it off. 

“Well, Arthur. You look like a total turnip head.”

“There are some more things I can try.” Arthur said, making to go back towards the clothes that they’d grabbed.

“No, no. I think this will do just fine.” Merlin said, and then he grabbed the pouch of gold coins. “Probably safer with me.” He told Arthur.

“Of course.” Arthur said. 

“I’m going to remember this for a long time, I think.” Corbett whispered to Merlin, snickering.

They walked until they came up on a caravan. The people they encountered happened to be smugglers. Though Merlin knew the King would not like coming out of his spell surrounded by smugglers, he and Corbett saw this as their best opportunity to sneak across the borders to safety. Tristan and Isolde were the self-proclaimed leaders of the smugglers. They were very much in love, and it made Merlin’s heart ache. Merlin had told them that they were taking care of Arthur, that he was simpleton. It was only really temporarily true. But Merlin had no idea when the spell would wear off. With his powers so out of his control lately, he really hoped that he’d have Arthur back soon. Even sullen Arthur was better than this man who seemed to have no idea who he was or what their relationship was. In short, he needed his friend. He’d told Corbett to be ready for Arthur to come to himself soon.

*******

Lancelot was shoved in a cell, stripped of his chain mail, with Eoin. He was a little surprised to see Gwaine, Elyan, and Gaius in another cell across from them. 

“Damn, I was hoping you’d gotten away.” Lancelot said looking at Gwaine. 

“No such luck. The King is safe though. He’s with Merlin.” Gwaine said, keeping his voice steady.

“How’d you convince him to leave you?” Lancelot asked.

“It wasn’t easy. It was strange. Like he didn’t think he was going to see me again. I sure hope it’s just his anxiety and not one of his funny feelings.” Gwaine answered. Putting his hand on his chest. Lancelot noticed the action and raised an eyebrow at him. Gwaine smirked. “I suppose you already know that we ran off and got married, yeah?”

“You didn’t think Merlin was going to be left alone after Aggravaine threatened him, did you? Me, Corbett, and Percival followed you that night after the feast. It was a very nice ceremony. I just wish we could have been more a part of it.” Lancelot said.

“I know. We just didn’t want to wait. You know him. He knew something was coming, he just wasn’t sure how much time we had. Part of their ceremony involved a marking of sorts.” Gwaine pulled his shirt aside and showed them the pattern of knots on his chests. “We’re connected through it. When we were on that hunt, I felt his panic and anxiety as if it were my own.”

“That could actually be useful. It’ll let us know if they are in any danger.” Elyan said.

“Yeah, but the downside is that he’ll know if anything happens to me, too. If Morgana does anything to me, he’s going to feel it.”

“That could be problematic.” Lancelot said thoughtfully. 

“Mm. Could be, that.” Gwaine said absently holding a hand to his chest. “I can’t believe that witch only gave us a week together. I’m gonna have to give her a piece of my mind.”

“You shouldn’t draw attention to yourself, Gwaine. If she sees that mark, she’s going to know what it is. She may not know who you’re connected to, but she’s going to know you’re connected to someone. We can’t afford that. Merlin has the King, and he will keep him safe. But that means now we have to keep you safe to keep him safe, does that make sense?” Eoin asked.

“Unfortunately, yes. Hopefully she doesn’t find out.” Gwaine agreed. They sat there in silence for a long while, resting when they could.

*******

The next morning Merlin was woken by a swift kick to his legs. When he finally sat up and realized what was happening, he was excited. 

“Arthur! You’re back!” He exclaimed softly. 

“What on Earth are you on about, Merlin? And while you’re answering that, perhaps you’d like to tell me why I’m dressed like the village idiot.” Arthur was fuming. “No? Maybe I’ll just go on kicking you then.” 

“Arthur, what do you remember?” Merlin asked, standing up and facing his King. 

“Camelot was overrun, Aggravaine, he was working with Morgana.” Arthur growled out softly. 

“I had to get you out of there. I couldn’t risk Morgana getting her hands on you. We’re on our way over the border now.” Merlin said as quietly as he could. 

“Merlin, who are these people?” Arthur asked.

“They’re, er. They’re smugglers.” Merlin said, not meeting Arthur’s eyes. 

“Smugglers!” Arthur almost shouted. This woke Corbett who came to stand at Merlin’s side.

“Shh! It was the best way to get you to safety. No one would suspect you of being, you know, who you are.” Merlin suggested. Arthur seemed to accept this. As they were packing up, they were attacked. Men dressed like the army Morgana had led suddenly surrounded them. Merlin and Arthur worked as a team shooting crossbow bolts at the advancing forces while the smugglers scattered. They were able to take down enough of the advancing force by crossbow and the remaining by sword and dagger. Merlin had retrieved the last of his blades and they made their way to Ealdor. Merlin knew they could rest there for a time while they sorted out their next move. Isolde had been injured by a sword stroke from one of the army, Merlin had ministered to her needs before she and Tristan parted from them. Arthur had a pained look on his face as he took in their loving glances, much as Merlin had. Merlin knew who he was thinking of, but chose to stay quiet. When they finally came over the hill to Ealdor, Merlin almost sighed in relief. He led his companions inside his home, and got Arthur to lay down to rest, while he went to speak with his mother. He told Corbett to stand guard with the King while he spoke with his mother.

When Hunith found Merlin sitting on a bench outside the house, she knew something was wrong. He tried to smile at her, but he couldn’t. She pulled him in tight for a hug and he just cried. He was so tired of trying to be strong, he wanted his love back, he wanted Morgana to be gone, and he wanted to help Arthur continue to be the great King he was destined to be. When he finally was able to compose himself again, they walked for a bit. 

“How is she?” Merlin asked when they’d made it back to their house. Gwen was inside and was changing out Arthur’s bandages. 

“As well as can be expected. It takes time to heal a broken heart.”

“Yes, it does.” Merlin took a seat on the small bench in front of the house. “You should know that I married Gwaine. We didn’t want to wait. And...I knew...or I felt something coming. Mother, whatever happens, can you make sure he knows how much I loved him? How much I cherished our time together? I tried telling him a few days ago, but I don’t think he understood. I...I can defeat Morgana. But I don’t think I’ll, uh, be around after. Don’t give me that look, please. If I somehow make it out of this, Arthur is going to be holding some sort of grand wedding, I know he is. You should be there. In Camelot. Gwaine is going to need you.” Merlin was holding his mother’s hand. They hadn’t noticed Corbett standing just around the side of the house listening.

“You are so brave, my beautiful boy. I only hope this time you’re wrong.” Just then there were screams from some of the villagers. Merlin looked up and found the village was surrounded by torches. He ran in the house and hurried to help Arthur get to his feet. 

“They’ve found us.” Merlin told him.

“There must be a way out.” Arthur looked at him, hoping to find an answer.

“There are some tunnels not far off. We can take them and escape to the Forest of Ascitir.” Merlin said reassuringly. “Trust me, Arthur. I won’t let them get to you.” Merlin gasped just then and touched his chest where the symbol connecting him and Gwaine was. It was a pain that he associated with fighting, so he knew his love was still alive at least. Arthur looked at him brimming with concern. “It’s fine. He’s fine. It’s a fight, I think.” 

“He’ll be fine. He’s got a lot to fight for.” Arthur told him, pulling him in close for a second and leaning their foreheads together. Merlin quickly wiped a tear and sent them out the back. Corbett nodded to Arthur and stayed right with Merlin. Merlin ran back to the front of the house for a moment and sent flames after Aggravaine who was leading a charge through the small village. As the group ran through the fields to the tunnels, Merlin called out in dragon-tongue hoping that Kilgarrah was nearby. Corbett had a hold of Merlin’s jacket and shoved him forward towards the caves. Aggravaine had spotted them crossing the field and had pursued them. Merlin had managed to dodge several arrows before he heard the roar. He was able to get to the tunnels, but quickly ran into Arthur, with Corbett watching the entrance behind them. Arthur was searching for an answer in his face. 

“Kilgarrah is taking care of what he can, though he won’t be able to get them all.” Arthur nodded in understanding.

“Do you know your way?” Arthur asked as they started making their way through. 

“Yes…” Merlin started to answer and trailed off.  _ Damn _ . 

“Merlin.” Arthur said, forcing the other man to look at him. It was just Arthur, Merlin, Corbett and Gwen, but Gwen didn’t know about Merlin’s magic and apparently he’d just said that through all their minds. Gwen seemed a little shocked. There was some noise behind them. Apparently not all of their attackers were taken care of by Kilgarrah. 

“Take this tunnel.” Merlin pointed to the path on the right. He’d sent a tendril of magic down the tunnel to see where it led. “It will lead you to some ridges that descend to the forest.”

“What will you do?” Gwen asked, finally finding her voice. 

“I’m going to give you time to get the King to safety.” Merlin said, meeting Gwen’s gaze. 

“No, Merlin, you can’t.” Arthur started to argue.

“Go. Please. I will meet you as soon as I can.” Merlin told him and ran off to where the noise had come from. 

“Arthur, we need to go.” Gwen said, imploring him to move. He looked at her then. 

“Go with Guinevere, Sire. I will make sure he’s safe.” Corbett said and gave Arthur a push towards the tunnel Merlin had pointed at.

“I’m sorry we didn’t tell you about his magic. I needed to keep him safe. To keep him secret from anyone that may seek to target or use him. He’s my brother, Gwen.” Arthur rambled as they walked. 

“There’s nothing to apologize for, Arthur. It’s Merlin. If he has magic, I know he would only ever use it for good. I wish I’d known, but I understand why it was kept secret. I expect that is why he has so many scars and there always seems to be a sadness in his eyes.” Arthur was feeling a lot of anxiety about leaving Merlin behind. “He will meet us. We must give him this chance.” She said pulling Arthur by the hand further down the tunnel. 

Merlin hadn’t wanted to leave Arthur or Gwen. But he needed to take care of Aggravaine. He rounded the corner and saw the man standing there. He jumped out and shouted making sure they saw him and gave chase. He took the other tunnel, the one he hadn’t sent Arthur down, and found himself at a dead end. Corbett stayed back waiting for Merlin to give any sign he needed help. Merlin turned around slowly, he had wanted to avoid a confrontation, but it was not meant to be. Aggravaine appeared flanked by a handful of men. 

“Merlin. Where is Arthur?” Aggravaine asked.

“Stay back.” Merlin warned, he felt his magic reacting and wanting to lash out at the man in front of him. 

“What? Come now Merlin. Where is he? What has he done for you? You’re just a servant to him.” Aggravaine was trying to taunt him.

“I’ve never been just a servant. Arthur is my brother, and I his.” Aggravaine had gotten very close now. He was only an arm’s length from Merlin. “I’m warning you.” Merlin said, feeling his magic coil, ready to strike. Aggravaine held his arms out as if to placate Merlin and then quickly pulled a dagger out ready to strike. Merlin was faster though. He held up his arms and everyone was thrown backwards. There were many resounding cracks as the men with Aggravaine hit the stone walls and collapsed, dead. As he was about to walk off, Aggravaine gasped in a breath and slowly stood, staring wide eyed at Merlin.

“You! You have magic! You’re Emrys!” Aggravaine shouted getting to his feet.

“That is what the Druids call me.” Merlin said simply, no emotion.

“All this time, you’ve been at court. And you chose to side with Arthur?” Aggravaine was getting angry and moving in towards Merlin again. 

“Arthur is my brother. It is my destiny to help him to be the greatest King Albion has ever seen. I will not allow you nor Morgana to interfere with that.” Merlin growled.

“You chose to protect Arthur over your own lover. Do you know what Morgana has been doing to her prisoners?” Aggravaine had an evil glint in his eyes. Merlin’s anger flared.

“He is stronger than you think. I would know if anything were happening to him. We are connected, by a bond you couldn’t comprehend.” 

“Then it’s only a matter of time before Morgana exploits that bond. And I will ensure that she takes her time with your King and your lover.” Aggravaine lunged at him again and Merlin’s magic threw him the length of the tunnel where he fell and moved no more. Merlin ran through the tunnels then, Corbett running alongside to keep him upright, trying to get to Arthur to ensure he was ok before he could let the panic set in. The thought of Morgana using his bond with Gwaine to torment both of them was unthinkable. They finally made it to fresh air and found Gwen and Arthur standing closely. As soon as they saw Merlin was safe they both came over and crushed him in a hug. He lost his composure for a minute.

“Hey, hey, you’re alright.” Gwen murmured. 

“I know.” Merlin struggled to get his emotions under control again. 

“What happened?” Arthur asked softly. 

“Aggravaine. He...he threatened that Morgana would make me choose between protecting you or saving him.” Merlin choked out, and his fear flooded his mind, causing him to barely contain the sob that was building. 

“Merlin, we won’t let that happen.” Arthur told him, trying to convey comfort in his words. There weren’t any more words that could be said. They just stood there, Arthur and Gwen trying to soothe and comfort their friend who was trying to hold it together, Corbett keeping watch at the cliff.

“I’m sorry. It’s not the time for this, I just don’t like not knowing what’s happening with him.” Merlin wiped his face. “Come on there’s a place we need to go.” And then he started leading them further into the forest. They met a small group of Druids, who all bowed to Merlin and caused Gwen more confusion. Arthur and Corbett stayed back and simply waited knowing they were having a conversation that no one else could hear. 

_ Have you spread the tale? _ Merlin asked.

_ We have. All those who fled Camelot are gathered near the stone awaiting word. They wait for their King, as we waited for ours.  _ The Druid, Mara, who had helped with his marriage ceremony answered.

_ Once Arthur has the sword, I will go with him to retake Camelot. I will not hide anymore. But I need you all prepared. This will not be an easy fight. I...I won’t be me anymore when this is over. I will need you to help Arthur. _ When Merlin put that thought across, the Druids were noticeably distressed. Arthur moved to put a hand on Merlin’s shoulder. Merlin gave him a weak smile.  _ I will vanquish Morgana and her dark magic. And I will always be with you. _

_ It will be a cold and lonely world without your light, Emrys. _ Mara said, brushing the tears from her face. 

“Come on then. Let’s go find your people, Sire.” Merlin said out loud, breaking the silence. 

“Merlin, what’s going on? Why were they sad?” Arthur asked, concern growing.

“Nothing to worry about for now. I promise. I have a tale to tell and I will tell it to you tonight while we rest and eat. But for now, There are some who would like to see you.” Merlin said and waved a hand over to the right. Arthur turned around and saw some of his Knights, Leon, Percival, some of the newer recruits, Travis was among them, as well as many civilians. Arthur smiled brightly seeing his people, his friends, and went to them, followed by Merlin and Gwen. Corbett stayed a few steps behind Merlin.

“I don’t want to lose you, Merlin.” Gwen whispered.

“What makes you think you’ll lose me?” Merlin whispered back. She met his eyes and smiled sadly. 

“It’s in your eyes. You are going to go after Morgana and you don’t think you’ll make it out alive.”

“Gwen…” Merlin started to say. She held up a hand.

“You’re my best friend. And I love you. Arthur does too. So do the Knights and the townspeople. I need you to know that. Before anything happens. You are so loved. And we don’t want to lose you.” Gwen’s voice broke then and she crushed him in a hug to hide her tears. Merlin couldn’t say anything to comfort her. He hugged her and rubbed circles on her back and let her cry. A few tears escaped his eyes as well. He had hoped to avoid anyone close to him finding out, but he was glad that it was Gwen. 

“Arthur is going to suspect something if we both keep breaking down like this.” Merlin said, trying to lighten the mood. Gwen smiled at him then, and touched his face. “Go, get some food. I’ll be telling a story later, only this time I’m going to add a little flare.” Merlin told her. She nodded and turned away from him to go see the other townspeople who had made it out. Merlin watched everyone and stayed back. Another pain erupted from his chest and he clutched it, trying not to fall. Corbett saw his wince and put a hand on his arm. Merlin quickly turned away from the gathere people and leaned against a tree for support with Corbett still holding on to him. He needed to work fast, and get Gwaine out of Morgana’s clutches. It wouldn’t be long before she figured out what the mark on his chest meant. Merlin only hoped that Gwaine could keep it hidden long enough for them to take the citadel back. Another hand reached out and touched his arm, and he felt the pain recede. When he looked up, he saw it was Iseldir. 

“Your bond is strong. We can help ease the pain for both of you, but it will require physical contact with one of you from one of us.” He said.

“Thank you. I know he’s ok, it just...I hate that I can feel that he’s hurt.” Merlin said, voice gravelly and rough.

“Come, eat. You need your strength maybe more than the rest of us.” Iseldir put a hand on Merlin’s shoulder and led him over to the Druid encampment, where those gathered bowed to him before returning to their duties. Many from Camelot watched with confused looks on their faces. After the meal was finished, Arthur gathered those from Camelot over by the Druids. 

“This week was meant to be a celebration of the changes of magical laws and forging an alliance with the Druids and their King. I fully intend to honor these celebrations and hold them when we are able. But I don’t think that he should continue on as he is. I need to honor him for all he has done for me, and all he has done for the Kingdom he has helped me build. If you’ll allow me, I’d like to present him to you all now.” Arthur met Merlin’s eyes, asking. Merlin nodded, agreeing. Merrik had appeared next to Merlin and placed the leather and gold embroidered circlet on Merlin’s head, after he’d nodded to Arthur. The Druids stood and formed a path from Merlin to Arthur. Merlin walked toward him, shoulders back, head high, while the Druids all lowered their heads to him as he passed. When he got to Arthur, Arthur smiled at him. “I present to you, Emrys, Druid King and friend of Camelot.” Merlin turned around to face all those gathered and released a burst of magic causing everyone to gasp, while his eyes and marks burned brightly with a golden light surrounding the camp. 

When he pulled his magic back, and the warmth and love he had shared was back under his control, there was a lot of cheering and shouting. Merlin blushed and tried his best to shift back to his previous spot. Arthur kept a hand on his shoulder though and insisted they sit together. Merlin was thankful for this and tried to show Arthur as much. Merlin decided it was time for his tale. He’d already told it to most of the Druids once, this time was mostly for those from Camelot. He quieted everyone then and began his story using his magic to shape the flames to the images he needed. When he got to the part about the Once and Future King pulling the sword free, and Arthur’s visage appeared, Merlin felt his friend tense next to him. When the images faded, there were more cheers. Many of the townspeople who had heard his stories before were upset that he hadn’t been using magic to tell his stories before and told him that they looked forward to him re-telling some of them now. He tried to keep his sadness hidden, and he must have done a good job, as no one commented on it. 

******

The dungeons were not comfortable. Lancelot couldn’t hide his worry or concern. Elyan had been taken before Morgana that first day as he had been with the King when he’d gotten away. When he was brought back, he was in a bad way. Gaius helped him down to the single mattress in the cell. 

“He’s been tortured with a Nathair.” Gaius said.

“Is there anything you can do for him?” Gwaine asked. 

“I’ll try.” Gaius said. 

“If he’d given me the information I’d asked for willingly he needn’t have suffered.” Morgana purred standing outside the cells. “As it is, I now know that they are making their way towards Ealdor. Seems Merlin is as predictable as ever.” She stepped on something then and bent to pick it up. She smirked at the token she now held. “Seems our dear Gwen spent some time down here after she broke my brother’s heart. You see this? It was to ensure that she never made it to the throne. It was at my hand that she was kept from it.” The Knights stared at her in shock. She looked between the Knights. Gwaine had tensed when she started talking about Merlin and his home village and enchanting Gwen. “Perhaps you’d like a chance to earn your supper tonight?” She asked, glaring at Gwaine. 

“What d’you have in mind?” Gwaine asked, frown deepening on his face as his anger surfaced. Morgana grinned at this and had the guards pull him from the cell. Gwaine caught the looks from the others as he was pulled through the corridors. He was brought roughly into the small audience chamber where no less than 20 of Morgana’s men were gathered. She unchained his hands once he was in the middle of the group. 

“I’ve heard tales of the great Sir Gwaine and his unorthodox fighting. I’d like to see how good of a fighter you are. Win, and you eat. Lose, and, well, you get the idea.” Morgana said sitting down in the chair as one of her men came forward. He hoped that he could get through this without affecting Merlin too much. He just needed to win and win quickly. He got lucky and the man he was fighting was rather terrible. Morgana tossed him a small chunk of bread. He picked it up and was taken and tossed back in the cell roughly. 

“Gwaine! What happened?” Lancelot asked, clearly agitated. 

“Nothing. She wanted me to fight as a way to earn food.” Gwaine said and tore off a chunk of the bread and tossed it across to the other cell before breaking his piece a few more times for Elyan and Gaius. 

“Gwaine, you need to get her to use one of us instead. Don’t do anything to antagonize her.” Eoin was angry now too.

“Calm down. I’m not trying to antagonize the witch.” Gwaine said.

“No, but she saw your reaction to what she said about Merlin and Ealdor. You need to not react to her.” Lancelot added. 

“I know. I just hope that they are better off than we are, ya know?” There was a murmur of agreements as everyone at their meager meal. They sat in silence for several hours watching as the sun made its way across the sky and settled again. It had been two days since he’d kissed Merlin goodbye and pushed him out the door. Gwaine was hoping to dream of his love, but it would not be. Morgana had come down in a rage just after dawn and pulled Lancelot from the other cell. They weren’t sure what was going on. A few hours later, he was dragged back and dumped in the cell with several cuts and bruises. Eoin did what he could to try to keep him comfortable. Morgana stood in the midst of the cells, fuming. Her attack on Ealdor had been thwarted and her forces there decimated. Aggravaine had been found dead in the tunnels. She looked between her prisoners and narrowed her eyes at Gwaine. He was doing his best to stay away and not draw her attention. Morgana looked to her guards and nodded at Gwaine and then headed away from the cells. The guards opened the cell door and drug Gwaine out again. This time Elyan, Eoin, and Lancelot were all yelling their opposition. When he was pushed in the center of the group of invaders again, Morgana left his hands chained together and handed him a small wooden cross that was sharpened on one end. This time several men came at him at once. He was a good fighter, especially when it came to all out brawls and scraps. He held his own for a while, but felt himself losing ground. His energy was very low and he received a hard hit to his head. He was losing. Gwaine was very aware of how little energy he had to fight back, no matter his desires. He felt a sudden jolt of energy rush through him. Something he’s only felt from Merlin’s magic. Renewed, he fought harder and won. Morgana looked angry, but she also noticed something he had hoped to keep secret. When he was thrown back in the cells, she stayed and followed him in . 

“You are not a magic user.” She purred. “But when you fought, I felt magic in you.” 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. There’s nothing magical about me, aside from my charming smile.” Gwaine said, trying to distract her. She reached over and placed her hand on his chest and he flinched back. That was Merlin’s place, not hers. She grinned, then. Freezing him against the wall with her magic, she tore his shirt revealing the mark that was imprinted there. 

“Well, Sir Gwaine, you are full of surprises.” She trailed her fingers down his chest. He growled at her touch. “I’ll give you a few hours to think about how you want to answer this. But understand one thing. I will find out who you have bound yourself to. And I will cause them immense pain, as I cause you immense pain. Enjoy your night. For it will be your last comfortable one.” Morgana turned then and left the cells, releasing Gwaine from the wall she’d held him to. 

“Dammit.” Gwaine muttered.

“What happened?” Eoin asked. 

“I fought. There were too many hits, I was losing. I thought for sure I was a goner. I felt a rush of energy though. Like magic revitalizing me. I was foolish to think, or hope, that she hadn’t noticed it.”

“Merlin?” Lancelot asked. Gwaine just nodded. 

“She doesn’t know who it is though. So hopefully he’s safe.” Gwaine said. He was feeling some panic build up. 

“He’s strong. You both are. Arthur will come for us. We need to give him time to get here.” Lancelot said. The night was short, shorter than they all hoped. The unease about Morgana’s discovery, kept them all on edge. Being locked up as they were, with no weapons, they couldn’t hope to make an escape attempt. As soon as the sun was peeking over the horizon, Morgana’s men came for Gwaine. He tried to fight, but they chained his hands together and drug him out, while the others yelled. When he was brought to Morgana this time, the room was noticeably more empty. He was thrown on the ground in front of her while she sat, legs crossed and bouncing slightly, and eyeing him like he was a new toy. 

“Sir Gwaine. Tell me. Does Arthur know that you are consorting with magic users?”

“Magic isn’t illegal.” He said, determined to keep his answers short. 

“Hmm. Maybe not. But I don’t think my brother would take kindly to knowing you have so fully bound yourself to such a person. You are, after all, sworn to protect the King above all others, are you not?”

“I am.”

“Then tell me, who is it that could sway a famed Knight of Camelot? What have they done to earn your loyalty? Your devotion?” She asked, searching his face for an answer. He fought to stay impassive and keep his lover's face from his mind in case she would find a way to pull it from him. “No answer? Pity. I was hoping you’d be more willing to talk than this.” She came and crouched down next to him, ensuring that his mark was visible. She then whispered a spell, causing her eyes to gleam a tarnished brass color, and he felt pain sear through his chest. She put her hand around his neck, cutting off his oxygen while he could do nothing to fight back. The pain was intense. He’d been stabbed before, but this was a hundred times worse. When he thought he was going to pass out, energy surged through him again. Morgana stepped back having felt the energy rush. She walked around the Knight keeping a keen eye on him. This might be trickier than she thought. Someone was feeding energy to the Knight’s bonded partner. Why would they do that? She called for Helios and had him send in a few men and a chair that she could chain the Knight down to. She kept at him all day using variations of spells and beatings, each resulting in a rush of energy that protected him. After spending all day like this she had the Knight returned to the cells. Let him think he was safe for a few hours. She would start again soon.

*******

Night did nothing for Merlin’s feeling of dread. He watched as the stars rotated through the heavens and the sun began to rise. Once the sun had peaked it’s first rays across the sky, Merlin woke Arthur up and told him to follow him. The pair walked in silence for a very short time, as Arthur was tired and really didn’t like mornings. 

“Merlin, where are you taking me? We need to be figuring out a plan to get back in to Camelot instead of taking a morning stroll.”

“Arthur, for once in your life, just please, be patient. I promise this will be worth it.” Merlin spoke low and soft, ensuring Arthur’s compliance. The King of Camelot just heaved a heavy sigh as he continued following Merlin. 

“Where did you learn that story you told last night?” Arthur asked, unable to keep quiet. “I’ve never heard it before.”

“I only recently uncovered the tale. I had come across something in the woods and wanted to investigate. That led me to the story of Bruta. Your ancestor, Arthur. I believe in the King you are and the King you will be. We all do.” Merlin said, finally stopping and turning to face him. 

“Are you making this all up?” Arthur asked, suspiciously. 

“Of course not.” Merlin replied, going for innocence. 

“You are, aren’t you? There is no such thing as this Sword in the Stone.” 

“Really?” Merlin asked. “What’s that then?” Merlin turned and faced the clearing that held the stone he had placed Excalibur in after the immortal army had been defeated. Arthur was in shock. He stood next to Merlin, staring, but not believing. After a few moments, he walked towards the stone. When he was next to it, he looked up and found all the citizens who’d escaped Camelot standing there watching and waiting. Arthur looked to Merlin with panic in his eyes. 

“What are you playing at, Merlin?”

“I’m proving that you’re their true King, Arthur.”

“That sword is stuck fast in solid rock.”

“And you’re going to pull it out.” Merlin said it with such confidence that Arthur felt some of his panic recede.

“You had better be right about this.” Arthur said and took the sword from his belt and stuck it in the ground. He walked over to the sword and gripped the hilt. He could feel how solidly it was stuck. He pulled and nothing happened. 

“Arthur, you need to believe. Believe in yourself, as I believe in you. As your people do.” Merlin said quietly, standing slightly behind him. Arthur took a deep breath relaxing his shoulders and keeping his sword hand on the hilt he listened to the sounds around him. “Believe Arthur.” Merlin breathed out. Merlin, staying out of sight, seeing Arthur’s eyes closed and the peace on his face, with a brief flash of gold, the sword slid free. Arthur was in shock and stared up at the phenomenal blade. Merlin grinned seeing the smiling and proud faces of the Camelot citizens watching. 

“Long live the King!” Leon shouted. The rest joined in, but Arthur was still staring at the blade. 

Merlin backed away silently letting the people approach and praise their King. When he was a few steps away he felt another pain in his chest. This time was worse. Much worse. He fell to his knees clutching his chest. A small groan escaped his lips before he could stop it. Arthur was at his side as soon as the sound came out. 

“Merlin?” Arthur asked, concerned. 

“She’s found his mark. Our bond.” Merlin gasped. He pulled his shirt down and Arthur saw the symbol imprinted over his heart. He was finding it hard to breathe. There were more hands on him and the pain began to recede and he was able to breathe again. Now it was a dull ache. He looked up and found several Druids touching him on his arms, his head, and his back. “Th-th..” Merlin gulped. “Thank you.” 

“Merlin, she won’t hurt him yet. She’s going to want to know who he bonded himself to. Why a Knight of Camelot would participate in such a ceremony since it involves deep magic. When we give you our strength, it goes through your bond to him as well. He will come to no harm as long as we can help either of you.” Merrik told him. 

“We’ll get him back, Merlin.” Arthur said with conviction, pulling him to his feet again. “I swear to you. We will get them all back. Gwaine, Lancelot, Elyan, Gaius, Eoin. Anyone that was left behind.” 

“I know. I believe you.” Merlin said. “We need to do it soon.” 

“First thing tomorrow. We’ll set up the plan tonight.” Arthur patted him on his shoulder and went to join Leon and Percival, who gave concerning looks to Merlin. Merlin straightened his face and gave them a reassuring nod. The day passed slowly with Arthur making the plan of attack with the Knights and guards he had. Merlin sat in a tent surrounded by Druids as Morgana had stepped up her game. Arthur was trying to tune out the distress that Merlin was experiencing. Gwen had gone to sit with him as much as she could. Corbett stayed nearby, never leaving Merlin out of his sight. The Druids told Gwen about the ceremony they had hosted for Merlin and Gwaine. When night was falling, Merlin fell into a fitful sleep. He gave up on trying to rest a few hours before dawn and decided to take a walk. He was followed, of course, by Corbett and a few Druids in case they were needed. Merlin found Arthur standing in the woods where he could see Camelot. He reached a hand out and brushed Arthur’s elbow, letting him know he was there. 

“Merlin. You look terrible. Were you not able to sleep?”

“Not really. I know she’s leaving him alone for now, so that’s something. Are you ready? There’s every chance she’s going to go for a confrontation.” Merlin said.

“I know. But I’ll have you, and she won’t be expecting that. I can count on your help, right? I know I’m asking a lot.” Arthur said, still looking towards Camelot. Merlin sighed. 

“I’m with you Arthur. I’ve said it before, but I'm happy to serve you. ‘Til the day I die.” Arthur looked at him now, hearing the resignation in his voice. 

“That day is far off, Merlin. I expect you to be around to advise me for a long time to come still.” Arthur said, watching Merlin’s face carefully. Merlin wasn’t in the mood to hide his feelings anymore.

“Arthur, should anything happen, I just want you to know how much I’ve enjoyed our friendship. Being your brother has been one of the best parts of my life. Our adventures, meeting the Knights, all of it. I wouldn’t trade it for anything. But, you know my funny feelings. I believe we’ll be successful. But...I don’t think we’re all going to make it through. Just...promise me that no matter what happens, you’ll keep trusting yourself. Trust in Gwen. She’s going to make a great Queen.”

“Merlin, I won’t let anything happen to you.” Arthur said, forcing Merlin to turn and look him in the eyes.

“I know that. Come on. Let’s go wake our people and take back your Kingdom.” Merlin told him.

“Our kingdom, Merlin. You should know, when I gave you my mother’s sigil, I claimed you as an heir to the throne. For the concerns of the court, you are royalty now. Not just to the Druids. You are my brother.” Merlin felt his eyes start to water. He had no idea that Arthur had made their bond official in any way. 

“Thank you. Arthur. I, uh, don’t suppose this means you’d make sure Gwaine is taken care of should anything happen to me?” Merlin chuckled a little. Arthur punched his shoulder lightly and ruffled his hair.

“Yes, it means I will have to ensure his well-being. Though, I implore you please do not leave me with him. I don’t think I could handle that.” Arthur laughed at Merlin’s expression. The pair walked back to the camp of people who were waking up. The people all went off to their assignments and positions ready to attack. Mara had followed Merlin, keeping close as needed. The group that intended to infiltrate the castle was Arthur, Merlin, Gwen, Leon, Percival, Corbett, Mara, and Iseldir. The other guards would infiltrate the lower town and take out the invaders who were standing at the gates. Percival, Leon and Arthur made short work of the guards standing just at the castle side entrance. Merlin was trying to focus, but feeling Gwaine so close was making it difficult. He needed to get to him. They split off taking out any and all guards they came across heading for the throne room where Morgana was sure to be waiting. Percival and Gwen headed to the dungeons to check on the prisoners and free everyone they could. Entering the throne room, Arthur was in the lead with Merlin directly behind him, along with Corbett, Leon, Mara, and Iseldir. Morgana sat smirking on the throne watching them approach. Helios was standing behind her. 

“Hello, dear brother. Nice of you to save me the trouble of finding you.” She said walking to the middle of the room as she spoke.

“What happened to you Morgana?” Arthur asked coming to stand directly in front of the high priestess. “You used to be so kind, so compassionate. I thought we were friends.”

“As did I. But we were both wrong.” She said angrily.

“You can’t blame me for my father’s sins.” 

“You’re no better than him.” She seethed.

“How? I’ve made it so those with magic no longer live in fear of being hunted. I’ve allowed magic to return to Camelot. But you, you have chosen to use your gifts for your own gains. Can’t you see the good that magic can do?” Arthur was trying to get Morgana to see reason. 

“You may allow magic, but you haven’t accepted it!” She shouted.

“Haven’t I? I’ve worked to bring peace with the Druids and make an alliance with them. Does that not make me a better King than my father?”

“The Druid King. You’re so sure that he would be on your side?” She sneered. 

“I know he is.” Arthur said with confidence, making Morgana falter. 

“You know who he is? You know who Emrys is? Tell me!”

“Never.” Arthur stated flatly. 

“Then I have no further use for any of you. Perhaps you’d like to explain to me before I kill you how one of your noble Knights bonded himself magically to another? It’s quite a ceremony, I’m told. The connection works both ways. When harm is caused to one, the other feels it. At that point, Helios pulled a figure from behind the throne and pushed them to the floor. No one moved as Gwaine slowly raised his head, eyes burning with defiance and anger. Morgana moved to stroke her fingers through Gwaine’s hair and Merlin couldn’t hold in the growl that escaped. Arthur put a hand on Merlin’s arm to hold him back. Gwaine and Merlin held their eye contact, not needing words, just being able to see each other brought them strength. “Merlin? Are you a little protective of this little Knight?” She asked, amused. 

“Let him go, Morgana.” Merlin said through gritted teeth.

“I don’t think so. You see, this Knight is my ticket to Emrys.” Morgana said, pulling a dagger out and setting it against Gwaine’s throat. Merlin’s magic was barely under control.

“I’m fine, Merlin.” Gwaine said. 

“Oh, be honest, Sir Gwaine. We’ve had some fun together haven’t we.” She said and pushed her dagger against his collar bone drawing blood. Merlin flinched, unable to hide it. Morgana had caught the reaction. “You? Oh, dear sweet Merlin, don’t tell me that you and dear Gwaine here…” She paused, dragging the dagger down Gwaine’s arm, while Merlin did his best not to react, but gasped and clutched at his chest. Merlin was getting more and more angry and was near losing control of his magic. He needed a little longer. 

“Morgana, your fight is not with him. It’s not even with Arthur. You want Emrys? I’ll take you to him.” Merlin told her.

“ _ You _ know who he is?” She asked, skeptically.

“I do.” He answered. Morgana was considering his offer, but Arthur was clenching his hand on Merlin’s arm. He looked to Arthur and tried to convey his apologies.  _ I’m sorry, Arthur. Take care of our kingdom. _ Arthur’s eyes widened when he realized that Merlin was saying goodbye. But he couldn’t do anything. Merlin had frozen the people in the room in place, stopping time. Merlin walked over to Gwaine and pulled him from Morgana’s grasp and placed him by Arthur. Merlin was able to have Gwaine not be frozen like the others. 

“Merls, what’s going on?” Gwaine asked, pulling him in close, not willing to let him go. 

“I’m ending this, love. You’re safe now. Stay with Arthur, he’ll take care of you. I love you. I’ll see you again someday, I know I will.” Merlin said, trying to keep his voice from shaking, trying to keep his tears from falling. 

“No! No you’re not leaving when I just got you back.” Gwaine was holding Merlin by his neck pulling him in for a passionate kiss. Merlin knew that if he stayed, he would never be able to go through with what needed to be done. So he kissed his husband. And before he could let him change his mind, he froze him as well. He saw the pain in his eyes, but he knew what needed to be done. He wiped the tears from his face before turning to face the high priestess.

Merlin walked over to Morgana. He put his hands on her arms and transported them to the courtyard outside. Once he’d done that, the magic freezing everyone in place had released. He put up a barrier about five meters across. Before Morgana could get her bearings he threw up his magic in tendrils, like he had for training, and wrapped each tendril around Morgana anchoring her on her knees to the courtyard. He used one of the tendrils to keep her from speaking. He could feel the power swelling inside him. He needed Morgana to understand what and who it was she was dealing with. He stripped off his shirt revealing the many marks on his body that covered his scars and also kicked off his boots to better connect him to the magic in the earth. Her eyes looked like they were going to burst when she took in everything and his power washed over her. He was glowing he knew it, but there was no stopping the flow of his magic now. He saw when his friends ran in to the courtyard finally, and noticed an audience completely surrounding his barrier. Merlin felt the words he needed brush against his mind and knew what to say. He started chanting a long complicated spell. His power was swelling and swirling the air around them. He reached out a hand as he was nearing the end of the spell and put it over Morgana’s heart. As he finished the words, he felt the magic leaving Morgana. It left her and was absorbed by Merlin. Both were gasping as the magic ran rampant and her dark magic tore through Merlin. He could hear his name being called as if from far away, but he couldn’t stop now. There were more words that needed said to finish the spell. The light had faded from Morgana’s eyes and she fell to the ground, dead. Merlin pulled the magic surrounding them back in and staggered under the onslaught. Before he could fall to the ground beside Morgana, hands caught him. 

“Merlin! Merlin, say something!” Gwaine was shouting at him.

“Love, I’m sorry we couldn’t have more time together. We should have done this a long time ago. Maybe then we could have…” Merlin arched his back and his breath caught as the magic surged in him needing release. “I don’t have long, but I need you to know. I’ll see you again. I swear it.” Merlin reached up and placed his hand on Gwaine’s chest where their bond was. “Take care of each other.” Merlin got to his feet slowly. He pulled Gwaine in for one last desperate kiss. Putting his love and adoration and joy into it. Then without any warning he shoved Gwaine back, where he was caught by Lancelot, who’d just come from the dungeons. “Take care of each other. I’ll see you again. One day. I love you all.” And then the magic rushed forward forcing the remaining words out of his mouth. Once they were out, he let out a pained yell, head tilted back. He couldn’t help it, the power was more intense than anything he’d ever felt. Merlin raised his arms and the storm he’d made before was nothing compared to the havoc that reigned around him. He tried to keep it contained to at most an arms length around him. The wind roared and when the lightning came, it wasn’t just one bolt. It was several in rapid succession and then a golden wave of energy rushed out across the land. The storm was gone, and so was Merlin.


End file.
